As I meditate in prayer
I realize heaven
Is the golden spaces
Between thoughts

I'm not unhinged
To consider gates,
And which side I'm on;
Who's allowed in, or out.
If a gate's open,
Do we rush or seep in?
Uncle Frank's gate leads to his plush meadow.
That's how I envision the Pearly Gates
With a slight squeak as they slowly close
On all the lies outside;
Souls sticking a foot between the gate and the post
While banging on the bars.
But the toes don't lie.

My soul feeds off my heart
and my heart needs people
to love only heaven knows
"Doves from Crows"
so even if you hate me
forgive me knowing
I already forgave you.

I've come to the outer limits
Where the stars bleed away
Melting into obscurity
Fading into the deepest back
An all consuming darkness

I've meditated and pondered
How I might move forward
In the absence of light
Without path or guide
Into the infinite void ahead

I sought to touch it
To feel the inky black darkness
Wash over my fingers
I imagined it thick like paint
Or perhaps far stranger

Yet when I reached out to it
I was blinded by light
Scarcely could I adjust my eyes  
But when I did I saw the nature
The true nature of that void

And it was only a thin veil

I’m so far from heaven
But also far from hell
I’m stuck in a world that doesn’t want me
And I don’t want to be here
Even less

Gloomy days lay ahead
For those that accept their fate
Living in autopilot
Believing the lies of the liars
Always afraid of the change

I try to assimilate to everyone around me
No one is ever the same
It’s hard work to be liked
When your identity doesn’t exist
I want you to notice me
But do you even know who you are?

I can spend a whole lifetime
Searching for myself
Alone in this lonely world
My mind compartmentalizes my trauma
Even then, I feel to damaged to go on

I need your love so desperately
Because without you I can’t go on
Please love me
Because your love is all I need
To fight these demons inside
I look at the mirror
To see if today is the day
You’ll finally love me
Better luck tomorrow
Today has been marred by self doubt

Heaven has a street called ‘Hope’
It leads from earth and is thin like rope
It’s a tight walk across earth to sky
Those who walk may fall but learn to fly

Heaven has a street called ‘Love’
It starts from here through to clouds above
It’s thinner than Hope but is stronger still
Those who walk may lose their way but not the will

Heaven has a street called ‘Faith’
This path is unknown but one can trace
both Hope and Love and where they intersect
They that walk may lose their life but not the respect

In the constant motion of calamity,
you are my tranquility.
My peace, my rest,
my heaven.

In the burning heat of the desert,
you are my oasis.
My lifesource, my rarity,
my hope.

In the unseen darkness of night,
you are my torch.
My guidance, my honesty,
my light.

In the meantime,
you are mine.

Dear God I thank you
for every single precious breath
And when you'll place us in paradise
   We shall thank you then for death.

People round the world gasping for breath, breathless,
short of breath, some unable to catch their breath,
       some breathing their last,
some on artificial costly breathalysers .
How many times do we thank God
for the countless free breaths we breathe our entire life??
Oxygen o2 more valuable and scarce than diamonds nowadays.
         Respiration, the main need of all life
Those who eventually recover from covid and find their breath again
             can finally breathe a sigh of relief.
Yet heavenly sights in paradise  will be sure
  to take our breath away anyway.

           Life or afterlife
      Here and hereafter
   Life's a gift from God
Now and thereafter
Why end it here and now
Why not extend fun and laughter?
When my DNA and RNA expires with me
  May God Resurrect and revive it in me
I live and die for an extension of life in afterlife
   God grant me that part eternity
To search for the meaning and purpose of life
   is to search and find the Creator of all life
      i know there's out there somewhere
     in Allah's universe, a heavenly portal
      that will lead me to eternal bliss
            designed by Allah the immortal.
Imagine a perfect heavenly life with no fear , death or problems
That's a life to die for, when Allah transports us to those realms.

    An abode with no sickness or illness
Only peace and total eternal happiness
No viruses but rather real flying horses like real Pegasuses
   We could get to ride and fly the universe
   with angelic wings without planes or buses
But you have to work to earn and deserve that heavenly paradise
        Just follow God's latest holy book, so perfect and so wise.

What you mean to me
stretches like a redwood far
beyond the forest of this life.
It’s as if my love for you
has a Soul of its own,
and that the warmth of your heart
is the Heaven it seeks..