Feels like I’m losing you. Slowly drifting apart. We don’t have the same vibes anymore. Everything feels different from your kisses to our skin touching. It just doesn't feel right anymore. I don’t know what to do. Do I let you go or do I stay and fight. If I choose to fight, how do I know it will be worth it and I’m not falling into a never ending black hole. Where my heart will feel even more numb than it already does. I need you to show me the effort. Show me that you still want me. Give me the slightest clue that you’re still in love with me. Make me feel the way I did when we were first together. I’m beginning to believe the butterflies have escaped and won’t return. They’ve outgrown this lonely dying heart of mine. I just want to rebuild what's breaking apart. I need you to give me the tools to do that. Lord knows I can’t do this on my own. You’ve begun to slowly but surely silence me. I’m starting to believe my words mean nothing to you. I could scream until my lungs exploded and you still wouldn’t hear me. It’s funny how you can think everythings just fine when I’m barely breathing. How you can go about everyday laughing and smiling while I’m in pain. The thing is you can’t even realize that. Or maybe you do and just won’t accept it. You just couldn’t handle the pain of me leaving so you keep me around in hopes that I’ll come around. Unfortunately I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, only darkness and sorrow. You’re not the only one to blame, I’ve had plenty of opportunities to walk away. Yet I was too scared of being alone again and starting over. I was dumb. At this point I don’t know if I could even feel anymore. What more could you possibly have to hurt me with. I have no pride anymore. I swallowed that a long time ago. So tell me what’s next in the endless circle of what you call “love”. I honestly don’t know if you even know you’re doing this to me. You’ve dealt with your own pain, but I'm not making excuses for how you treat me. I’ve never caused you pain nor would I ever think about it. That’s the thing my heart is too good for most. Even for myself. No matter what gets done to me my heart still won’t change. That’s the saddest thing. It’s like i'm killing myself and can’t stop. When will I stop drowning myself.
