Walk on the tight rope of life and watch the world crumble below you

You asked me if I was okay.
Not really wanting to know the answer. It was more of a
prerequisite to getting me to your bed.
Watch out.
Caring can be a sign of weakness, a sweet spot to the whole **** building collapsing
Boy, can’t you see how weak you are?
You break bones like twigs, sitting awake at 2 a.m. drunk and alone pretending to enjoy yourself
When it takes all of your courage to face the darkness
And I am darkness, no wonder you could never face me sober
I have been here for far too long, looking for an end,
But all I keep coming up with is a map of this maze I can’t find my way out of. Instead, I find my way to you. Join me,
I will try and save you
But my lips never held enough alcohol for intoxication, never enough to get your next fix
Hurling crushed cans out windows, you created birds out of bubbles and hops
And other **** that made you look like the child that jumped out of the tree thinking he would fly and realizing he couldn’t, and
I wanted to make you fly
You found out and tied boulders around your ankles, willing me to try harder. And I did. Everyday. Until I got dizzy eventually and I will never be strong enough pathetic boy, nor you will ever be brave enough to handle a being like me
In the end the sweet spot gave and the whole **** bridge came down
I gave up on boulders and flying and began to swim
I sure had had enough practice breathing underwater
This time I left you to drown

-KZ

There was a time
When I was with you
And each smile,
Each shiver was framed
And hanged
On the walls of our dreams.
Now I fall asleep
And everything
Is silent,
Except the screams
Of those paintings
As they crumbled
To the floor
And didn't mean a thing
Any more.


F.Z.**N

Faces intertwined like
Brambles in my mind
Cold lips give breath no more
Images burned behind my eyes
Much too easy to retrieve
While memories of the love
Of warmth and safety
Stay faded like stone-washed denim
A translucent curtain
Fluttering in the wind expelled
From your last words
Leave me endlessly uncertain

I am a structure, hastily built
Cemented within my chest, the weight of the world
Burdens of nations, plastered on my shoulders
My base starts to move
How long til I crumble

he still holds your name in his
mouth like his first
communion, his hands would still fit the mold of your
hips if only you'd
let him try. you can remember the light of
after, the gleam of the scissors as you tried to make him
pretty, his strength littering the floor sort of like the plates in your
kitchen now, that kind of
damage. it must've took a whole lot of
something for that to
happen, they say to you. the
aftermath is not
pretty. without his flower petal
ponytail he is no longer
pretty.

it's not a coincidence that his name sounds like falling
cities, how you never bothered to learn to sleep
alone.