What is this?.
Can I understand.
Is this something beyond me.
People will think I am a fool.
Why am I not understanding it.
What's happening.
Am I not concentrating in it.
I should run.
I am shy, I can't answer.
I don't know.
What to do.
I am getting scared...

And suddenly my soul came out.
I was shocked,
my hands were shivering.
My soul spoke to me.
Told me that,
'It is your fear, that is eating up your confidence' .
Go back and speak up your mind.
Go back and fight against your fears.
I don't have the confidence to answer back, to
fight, and to learn.
I am fool.
My soul told me ' that's it,
you got it. You got that you have the confidence but you
don't know'.
My soul went away.
My mind and my heart were telling me to go.
I went to **** my fear.
To speak in front of people.
To open up my feathers to the world.
I got that confidence,
that was hiding from me for so many years.
And lastly, I remember that
That fear that would wake up everyday, everywhere.
My tears that falls on the ground everytime.
Now that my confidence has come to my way,
I am feeling my night as a day.

Yes I'm the pregnant girl
Carrying fluids and fats in replacement of a child
I am the girl whose body component is mostly made up of fats.
Ashamed???.....Yes,
But not of what YOU say anymore
But of ME, letting you define me
But of ME, letting you paddle my existence
I am ashamed of MYSELF for jogging 60miles a day just to slimfit myself into your T-shirt
I am ashamed of me downloading several "LOSE BELLY FAT" apps and making my body go through every pain and exhaustion, so you could be proud to call me YOUR OWN in the public.
I am ashamed of me for fighting and cursing the genes that makes up my entire being,
Wishing for the perfect tummy, figure 8 shape and trying to please your existence forgetting mine.
But it's over!!!
I am done being ashamed of the fat in me,
I am done being ashamed of hiding,
I am done wishing,
And YES! I am the fat, ***-bellied, intelligent, smart damsel you lost while searching for a perfect, slimfitted, cuddle mate.

I sat with my grief long enough
To be at peace with her
Asked her how she came to live with me
She replies with a simple answer
I am the product of your lovely heart
The heart that allowed itself to be touched,broken and mended.
I asked if she would leave soon
She replied, so as long as love lies inside,
I will also be.

I sat with my pain , who looked wrung out and bled profusely
I offered a cloth to stop the bleeding
But she refused to take it, said she didn’t want to heal
I then proceeded to ask her why she stayed
She starts to cry aloud and shows me her wounds
When I looked carefully I saw that they were bind with heaps of memories and guilt
I slowly took a deep breath and untangled the rusted chains of guilt one by one
The beads of memories were tightly wrapped between the chains
It took me a thousand tries to untangle the mess
But when I finally did, my pain stopped bleeding . She took a breath of relief and thanked me for it
The next morning she left and replaced herself with wisdom

I also sat with my insecurities
We sipped a cup of warm chamomile
When it was all calm, I began to ask her
How and why she became a part of me
She looked afraid and shaken for a while
Then she whispered and told me
It was because the world had distorted my own perception of myself, that she was born and grew to be a part of me
I did not want to kick her out so harshly, lest she be filled with more fear
So I gave her a pat on the hand and kissed her gently
Told her she need not grow any longer
And asked her to become my best friend
I was no longer ashamed to be with her nor was she with me,
And this is how I found a home inside myself.

I gave food the power in my life
and watch it completely destroy me.

“Does it pick me apart piece by piece?
Or does it eat me
in perfectly portioned bits?
Does it scarf me down?
Or does it daintily
pluck at me with lush lips?
Does it stay awake at night?
Or does it just
eat me completely carefree?”

I wonder why I gave it all this thought
and why I let it turn into such an assault.

Though my smile is as illuminating as the morning sun,
it grows dim in the night hours.

Even though my lips are full,
they fall flat a lot.

My body is curvy and a nice sight to see,
but there are some days I hate it

Though I wish my skin were lighter,
I love my two tonedness

I know that the realest people don't have lots of friends,
but I wish I had at least one more

See, I'm that girl who knows there's more like her
The girls who acknowledge their imperfections
But still love their flaws
They keep their heads up and make the world their own
The ones who are determined to be the greatest
The ones who never fully fit in
Their smiles go dark but they don't let it stay dim forever
The strong women who look the world in the face
And say, "You ain't ready for me baby"
The big and kindhearted girls who will love you but will know when it's not worth it anymore
The ones who dare to believe that they can do anything they put their minds to
The missfits who were cast aside
But walked back in center with her hands on her hips and kept going forward

Life is something else on its own
But I do my best to make it a better day for myself
I can't stop smiling
I can't stop laughing
I can't stop putting in 100 percent every day
I gotta keep moving
If I ever stop, I'm halting my own progress
And I'd rather not make that my own reality
#OWL'******br>

You breathe words down my neck,
that there's no gold found on me,
that instead of gold my fingers leave dirt behind,
that my tangled hair reminds you of weeds in the garden,
that my legs are filled with bumps and scars,
that my stomach protrudes too far,
that my thighs are too robust,
that hair on my skin is only the devils invention.

The brown skin you press against,
is far from the vibrant soft metal of gold,
you'd remind me time and time again,
and I'm lucky that there's a fool looking for me.

To make my heart abode, he pulled me out of untrodden road even before the world was made!…..


She activated spirituality in and over her life to brood
And wished to work on plans and purposes of God, holding her solitude….

Rise up and Form an Unshakable attitude that God mirrors through you, where unwavering confidence would gather too!


Prayer needs to be constant, force yourself to wake from what’s stagnant…. As on earth my assignments demand accomplishment, helps me stand independent

I choose to live and dwell in his purpose,
For my breath is his purchase…O his love is reckless and his gifts are countless

Do not sit in shame….quench your earthly flame…for his love fights till you’re found leaves the ninety nine and delivers all your needs just in time…..just in time…

You want to roast me like an eggplant, all brittle flakes and bleeding oil, as if that puckered off-white skin underneath reveals significant sins. But I’m a ******* diamond. Not rare or edible or remotely useful, you’ll only find the stubborn carbon Hollywood calls beautiful. They fail to mention, or maybe you forgot, I was born bearing the earth on my back and my crucible of 2000 degrees makes your stove look like a nightlight.

So if you want to cut me to watch me break, be careful - I’ll shatter your knife.

sun dries my hair
thick and sopping with
dahi, coconut oil,
on the terrace
I peer into the endlessness
of all four directions and
the summer haze
does not halt my lack of
hesitation, inhibition.
lokhi hands release the robe and
I embrace the morning sun.