i am a Spidey red Pontiac
the ceiling is falling in and the doors are broken
(that you pry open anyway
but only because i want you to)

you ask me with your eyelashes
why i don't put thumbtacks into the parts of me that droop and sag along the interior

and the heater whines softly,
smoke spilling in from a mangled motor
because i ask myself the same question

we are cramped, you and i
the stuffing seeping out of the back seat,
the mangled box spring hearts dangling from our chests like metal slinkies that can't find the floor
because we've swallowed one too many books
and seen each other barefoot once too few
but we are happy, you and i
we find amusement in red sweaters and pull Pokemon from Abe's old hat

i wouldn't pass the safety inspection for your soul
(but you drive me anyway)

I've stopped wearing seat belts
And looking both ways before I cross
Because when I hear the screech of tires
And feel my car slip and fishtail
It makes me feel something
When all I feel now is nothing.

Moving
     everyone's        cars in
the morning

before work

is       always

a                                


                     ­       struggle .

I was driving down a curvy road
And I saw a cross of some fools soul
I didn't know
I saw some road **** as I went by
Well at least they pulled it off to the side

Set fire to your ants with magnifying glasses
Self-immolation a monk turned to ashes
See what you want, it will always seem better
I guess I like the ocean sea better  

My thoughts coagulate and my contemplation thickens
There’s no more catalyst to loosen the tension
But what can I do, for is this not my soul?
What is this existence I am forced to behold?

Well I guess that’s life
At least that’s what I’m told it is
I guess I’ll go to sleep again
And hope things get better within

Cars crashing,
seatbelts couldn't hold them back
as they flew through the windshield,
waterfalls of glass
cascaded over the smashed front,
the ground sparkled coldly,
red glinted off of the glass
that was embedded into the flying figures.
Bodies hit the ground,
they made a hollow sound,
blood pooled out around them.
They were young souls,
gasping out their final breaths,
their chests heaved as they screamed.
People gathered around
crying hopeless tears.
Nothing could change their fate.
As the ambulance finally came,
and the cars were towed away,
only one thing remained,
it was the young blood that stained
the grey pavement.
No tears,
and no rain,
could ever wash away this blood
that now tinted the hearts of the people who saw
just exactly how violent it is
to die young.

Once again, 7 years later, Im faced with these Lights.
The music changed but the mood still the same.
I relax.
Head tilted up I watch these Street Lights whistle a tune by my memories. Strange  people, the car an anomaly from times known, but this feeling... Still so much the same.
No curve this time, no speed limit; like we cared then or now.
Instead of school tomorrow it's a job, instead of teachers it's higher ups. Regardless.
I ask myself the same question now as I did then, "Can we make it?"

i'm broken down
on the side of the road
and when people pass
they just drive faster
so they can pretend
not to see
so they cannot feel guilty
about passing someone
who desperately needs help
and i wonder why
they can get behind the wheel
when i can barely stand up.

A few years ago
I fell in love
Racing 60 mph down a 45 zone
Clutching the seat and the door
Of a 98 nissan sentra
Hoping to get the hell out of that car
Because i couldn't stand him anymore
His reckless turned me on though
In a way that opening that car door
Seemed like an exit strategy
I didn't need to take after all
The darkness that encased the car around us
Seemed like the perfect mood setting
For the thrill we both wanted
And for me what i needed
Love didn't understand that
My fear for speed
Resembled my fear for life
Life always seemed to flash by to fast
Like it always had some place to be
And i wanted to remain still
I wanted to take a picture
Because i knew it would last longer
Instead of it always changing
And rearranging itself
Love drove me through the streets
many countless nights
Expanding my perspective
Reversing my sense of direction
A feeling of protection
That i didn't have before
Love gave me reasons
To speed through life
To not be scared
To every once in a while
Let go of the handle
That i strictly held onto
Love became my life
And i thank god
Each and every day
That i didn't take
That exit strategy
That i sped away into the night
And lived an actual life.

A body like running pavement
and filled with
skidmarks --
broken pictures of sunset sky between trees
power lines--
they fall and rise like waves,
quickly flashing.

A mind like an endless set of highways
there's no map to tell
where anything could end up--
ideas that are
headlights, move with uncontrolled velocity,
bobbing in the darkness, wheels
humming from the engine, throaty engine--
voice that's a radio, projects songs
and thoughts
to the passengers--

it's not a roller coaster, we don't choose to be behind a wheel
but we're all in our vehicles
with horns
and shouting matches and road rage,
swearing, arguing our luck,
gambling the speed limit
to try to get to all our destinations
"on time"
but God only wants you to feel the wind rushing
through your rolled-down windows,
or contemplate on silent journeys, a
seemingly never ending stretch of road,
breathe through the starry summer nights,
sunlight flickering on rooftops,
dirt paths in forests,
trees, lights,
pedestrians,
a hitch hiker,
clouds,
parks,
mountains,
cities,
stoplights,
billboards,
­but all you see is the
pictures fading into a blur--
blurring,
all
blurring,
and sudden--*

                          collision.

I met a man
I met a woman
When I was driving down the interstate
While I was driving down this road
An interstate of broken dreams
A road of blood and tears of others
He seemed different
She seemed mysterious
I was running from the past
I ran trying to catch the future
My car collided with his
I met her when our cars collided
Now we don't know each other
She seems to have forgotten
Now here I am sleeping
I am just laying here
Can you hear me?
Are you near me?
Can we pretend to leave...
And then meet again...
When both our cars collide?