Why are they laughing at me?
I'm normal as they are
Who else could I be?
wishing only to remain somewhere far

Will they ever leave me be?
healing scar is rare as a falling star
Can I ever be free?
reachimg my life's goal like a formula one car

Wet blue velvet jacket in a cold winter night,
it freezes under the blue light of the moon
close to the watery eyes of the grieving knight

Dry fallen leaf gone in the howling wind,
carried around and unable to go elsewhere
under the fiery autumn sky in our minds

"No offense but you're like really fat."
this was said to me in second grade by another kid
to be fair, yes i was an obese little second grader but i had been growing about three inches every year since i had turned three
i don't believe this person was being inherently malicious
but i will never forget their words and the way they made me feel

I wanted to write a poem
about the incessant discomfort
I always feel in my left eye
whenever my contact lenses
become old and dry
I thought about how it tickles
but scratches at the same time
and starts off alright
just a minor annoyance
but quickly, overtime
becomes almost unbearable
like my pre-school bully himself
is folding down one of my eyelashes
just enough for it to poke me
at the slightest movement
then I thought about how
I'd sooner write a poem about my life
and how it started out equally alright
and quickly, overtime became almost unbearable
as if my pre-school bully didn't do it right

so I found him in his adult life many years later
wife, two kids and a mortgage
yappy staffy-cross, two cars
and an alright job as a graphic designer
his garden full of gorgeous flowerbeds,
a full head of hair and a fading right hook
"MAKE ME FEEL **** LIKE YOU DID THEN."
a puzzled look on his face,
garden hose flooding his drive and the yappy
staffy-cross still yapping away
at the living room window
"I'M DEAD SERIOUS ANDREW,
NOTHING HURTS LIKE IT USED TO."
so he called the police
and I never got to feel young again
unless you count scurrying away from
a council estate under the threat of
a poor meal at Parkside police station
the rekindling of my youth

so this is my infomercial poem
about how not to confront someone
always be fully clothed
that's very important
avoid being drunk
any mind altering substance
is best avoided in my opinion
remember just because you care
just because you remember
does not mean anyone else does
oh and
don't eyeball craft beer when
you still have your contacts in
you know what?
-just don't eyeball craft beer

Insecurity is a fast acting disease.
Pouring into every cell,
thickening the lens,
distorting view.
Erupt in jealousy,
tension fills the chest, breathing deep feels sharp.

Pick at their flaws,
make them feel small, tempt them to inch down to your level.
Do what you can, in every desperate attempt,
But the self disgust still radiates off your skin.

The unjustified hatred will
consume you,
convince you,
that you truly are the victim.

But it is merely a sickness that will eat you away.

The infinite flambeaux guards inside me daily haunt the subtle led through which the darknesses enter inside me and bully me.

Am I to be insulted?

heh heh

Correction; my love.....no.. no-my lust for knowledge is insatiable
Proud to be, in the ways that I'm stuck, to ponder the who's, the when's, the why's and the whats. I thrive to pursue the touch of intelligence to quench the aching must. A combination of patience, self-discipline, determination, and dedication will construct any road you wish to travel in this Nation.
So call me a Nerd, oh i know, I take pride in the fact that I know facts, in fact I bet that that fact alone is why you react by recalling that: I'm a Nerd.