as the emotions begin to pour out of me
it seems to feel like an eternity
wrapped around your finger
the thoughts seem to linger
with the brief touch of heart
and the sudden urge to depart
the attachment is only temporary
but, let's go back to february
where it almost seemed less scary
though the temptation is urging
i feel it emerging
the overwhelming fear
leaves me with no time to hear
how you're not like the rest
though unable to be expressed
take me back to february
where all feelings were unnecessary
take me back to february
where thoughts were only imaginary
hand in hand
living in our own wonderland
- february
a.m.

He couldn’t understand that my heart was already shattered,
and no matter how much he tried to glue the parts together with sticky words,
tiny bits out of his sight went  missing,
scattered on the dusty floor of habit and weariness.

I saw you tonight for the first time in months. Your hair was shorter and your face was covered in stubble, I’ve never known you as anything but shaggy haired and clean shaven, it was yet another reminder that I no longer know you.

You wore a dad hat and pink T-shirt, clothes I never would’ve recognized you in, but you still wore your worn down converse like you did when we were almost us.

You’re quieter now and your smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes. What once made you laugh until you cried now leaves you stone faced and I’m beginning to question if I ever knew you at all.

I still miss you, but it’s easier to miss you when you’re no longer the person I fell in love with. It hurts less to look at you and remember what we had when I know it’s no longer possible to love you like that.

I hope that you’re still happy. I hope you continue to laugh until your stomach hurts and watch ****** reality tv until the sun comes up. I hope your days are filled with far too many iced coffees, ridiculous twitter threads and indie music.

Tonight I said goodbye to the boy I fell in love with, in his place stands the boy that broke my heart many months ago. I don’t know where you stopped and he began but I think it’s time to move on from you. You’ve evolved into a different version of yourself and as much as I miss the person that completed me he’s nothing more than a memory to mourn.

It hurts, every time I hide the fact that I still like you.
It hurts how my heart is still hoping for that chance,
and it hurts that I know you only talk to me when she can't.

She's desired by millions
But acquired by losers
She's survived those losers
But she still has bruisers
Reckless in who she chooses
Stubborn and pain oozes
From the greatness that she callously
Disregards
For she is broken in the heart

The sun is so bright, hurting my ******* eyes.
But what compares to your icy blue eyes?
Your hair shines a shade of heavenly gold.
They type you find ingrained in an old Victorian home.

My eyes meet yours, my cheeks turn rose.
You smile and I laugh.
Telling me about the girl next door.
I think how could be like her, can you not see I’m trying to be her?
I want so desperately for your attention, but how can you when I’m only the girl you come to when your lonely.

I’m waiting for you patiently.
I thought you were done with this phase, I told you she’s no good for you.
Can’t stand the ****** affection.
She’s such a attention seeking *****.
But she’s my friend, and I care for her more.

A kiss behind the shed.
Hide under you parents bed.
A holding of hands, but we’re only friends?

Don’t wanna be with this guy, but we’re grown up.
Time has passed us by, and its time for me to grow up.
You still linger in my mind, wonder if you think of me time to time.

Gotta act happy at your wedding, you married your middle school crush.
Hope you think I’m happy.
Nothing will ever compare to the nights with you.

I think I loved you.

where does love go?
when that deep immense feeling of belonging
dissipates like a mist in an ocean breeze.
does it gently fade away, as it evaporates in the sky?
is it remembered?
does it still exist?