yesterday i drowned myself
in a bottle of red wine and some gin
i tried to stop breathing
but ended up gasping for
even more air.

To lay with my head on your lap, was all I ever really wanted do.                                                              ­                                                                 ­                                                 
                                                                ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­        A place where I can be safe.                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                                    A place where I can be warm.      
                                                     ­                                                                 ­                                                  Somewhere I can let every care float away from my mind.

When I am with you, even breathing has a sweetness, to it, that I can't begin to describe.

in and out
oxygen
if you can breathe
you can live
if you can breathe
you can fight
so dont stop breathing
because i need you.

Fresh air I need
Suffocating I can't breath...

Ventilation I get ...
When am with you..
Relaxation kick in...

Easily I breath in...
Controllable feelings...
I express...
It's not complicated...

Unless....
I stop breathing...
Can I confess...
To me..
You come first...
joy in a flash..
When I hold you...
I can feel myself breathing again.

-kay🌹

Wood burns from blue flames
Air drawn in does change
Prepared for events to unfold
Stationary held for take off
Past the count of numbers out
Breathing easier now
A transient being announced
Green lady elevates state
Orange eyes merge, lights diverge
Lifted into what seems to be
A tunnel of colourful multiple Vs
Pleasant fate when identity dissipates
No pain, no pressures, no claims
Just white space
Until pulled back into this place
To live a life again

I cannot resist your wriggle
your movement wrestles me awake
from my routine slumbering lumbering day
your breath
your wind are my oxygen
telling me I’m alive
you move from heart to fingers
and dance on the floor
of this keyboard
with your partner
pen on the smooth flat surface of paper.

It is more vital to write my heart
to write write write as I MUST
than to obey some poetry manual
or imitate Longfellow, Rumi, or Frost
or any other.

Writing your movement is like breathing
I cannot go long without it
you impel me to this place
this oasis
this pure land
these tropics
where I let you speak
and have your way with me,
you my magnificent muse.

A virus appeared one day
Summer was no longer ours for fun
Walks became a thing for one

Locked inside, no room to breathe
Movies all day and drinking all night
Half the money coming in

Bike rides and swimming wild
BBQs and summer wine
We opened up again

Flights cancelled, passports banned
The United Kingdom in another lockdown
Jobs have stopped or are on strong pause

The mood is dropping, life isn't as fun
Queuing for food one by one
I sit in the window and wonder

What could life have been
What adventures have we missed
As I watch the sunrise

It made me think
It made me dream
It made me sit still and finally learn how to breathe