To those hidden under blankets, huddled close to their lovers:
     There are some among us who are wrapped in blankets of our own tears.

To those who purse their lips in a smile as soft melodies floating through the air lull you to sleep:
     There are those of us who write sleepless lullabies on our arms with the sharp embrace of the blade, our only comfort.

Hello my blade
    My age-old friend
You've been with me
     Through thick and thin
And now I've come
     But once again
To use you now
     Once more to sin.

My life in shambles lays ahead
Behind, a falsehood, love is dead
No options, I agree, remain
So though I have, my best, 'till now refrained
I seek the bitting edge once, evermore
To ease the pain which ever-beats its sore

And as I open flesh-ed wounds to scar
So my soul numbs, heart as black as tar
The pain, it blessed, ebbs away quickly
And I can breathe again, rattling, sickly

No cure for panic, loss, and crippling pain
Have I found, but blood, which falls like rain
Not of a Savior, Christ within
But of the broken drowned in sin

What is waiting for me? I hate the unknown
Does this what makes life beautiful? Or the tomb?

Darkness sets in and i bleed again
I close my eyes and wait for my end

I lost faith in humanity and myself
A tear escapes my eye before my last breath

I hold my wound and curse my luck
Coward or brave? I know not

A shining silver nail and my stitched veins
A story of a lonely kid experiencing numbness and pain

Words Of Harfouchism

I held it momentarily at my throat gliding
it effortlessly as it permeated in tears of release.

You should have known this was coming,
the signs were there, but I couldn't keep it
hidden. I released the blade upon my throat.

I held it momentarily, then cleansed myself
of a burden that had hung there far to long.

You should have seen your tears in the mirror,
that part of me now gone. Laying on the ground
crumbled lifeless, A history of growth now fallen.

"Shhh....
No one needs to know..."
The razor whispered
To her skin as
It violated her.

I live in a dying vessel

torn by the blade of lies
the core of the hurting soul
hanging from the thread of love
a trapped heart no longer whole

Nicotine*

Your mother told me
I'd miss you this year -
I already knew.
I wish I could tell her
everytime I've had to
shove a blade of tears
down my throat so
no one would have to
watch my eyes bleed it.

The problem is, I
miss you quite easily,
I still need to build up
my resistance, but even then,
I would not be able to
ignore your absence
the same way you cannot ignore
a gap in between your front teeth.

I will have tearful nights
because my lips will ache for yours,
and my limbs will feel too isolated.
I will have days where I
will be in shades of black
like a funeral,
but that will be how I'll know
that I'm fully alive,
because I'll miss you so.

So I won't be able to ignore
your absence,
but maybe I'll put it to the side
until all the upcoming times
we'll see each other again,
and then I will let it all
take over me
and give into you, sweet nicotine.