I suffered, so I don't let others suffer,
I was ***** so I don't ****,
I was abandoned, so I don't abandon,
I wasn't loved, so I love you,whoever you are.
I was betrayed, I don't betray.
I wasn't killed, so I **** the filth instead.
What an interesting turn of events.

you were too much like a nectarine
in early summer. All poreless and bright
and insinuating sweetness. Filled me up
with your secret eruption then shut me down
with your sleek silver tongue. Lava barricaded my eardrums,
enhancing my blood, fire in your eyes.
I was a plum, stealing forth
in the wake of your Augustine heat. My tender skin
gave way to your deft touch.

But then I bit down,
tasted the flesh beneath your glossy sheen
and oh how it betrays you!
So yellow and unripe, so taut with newness,
still clinging to the brightness of dawn,
spring-frozen with fear of the darkness
of my nectar.

Today I woke up with a magnet
in my pitted stomach. Echoes of
cold metal scour my throat. That love-
-less twang in the aortal penumbras--hope,
a refuge swallowed by the ephemeral night.
I always knew
you were too much like a nectarine
in early summer.

I stand up, look with the eyes in the mirror
****** and red
Show my palm to hold the glass but i wipe
My tears instead
I know I might cry again, the cause I cannot
Erase you from my head
Maybe I go, I go and sleep, sync with my bed
Instead I hope you hope…. I do not have you at all
With wishes that the moments should have been dead
Then I will be banging my head, hate will rule over
Eat in me deep
feelings shall heap & the nightmares will be begging
For life… but no,
Nothing of this part of my bliss will ever change
Nothing will ever go
You will just be someone I would know
but death…. gently decorated lying in the coffin, waiting to be buried
Praying, wishing if I was staying up to see the flower grow off me
And let you pluck it off to give away to the one who replaced me
in you but are you freaking kidding me?
Because I will wait till someone tells you, ‘Get off me, you’re irritating me’,
And send the news to my fellow dead one’s you can now rest in peace
It was one of the days, she says, she wants to speak with you,
‘look at this kid, he wants to be someone like you’
Green land, holding hands, I’ve been dreaming
about bands of colors in slow motion of the portion of it.
I wish to remember a part of my emotion. I check the album turn up the pages and recall the moments in a negative version.
I shout out and screamed
I was told to closeout a deem or maybe hold to be
what I’m not supposed to be
I loved you, adored you, the same I wanted for me
but though I knew life is not how it promises
then I forget I ever lived in the premises
where you were the nemesis all I did was anything to make you feel home
not just bricks and layers If we really know what living is
I am trying to unload, trying to whisper and speak to whatever, whoever I’m not,
now because I’m lost, it has cost me more than I can imagine maybe one day I can

maybe one day I can ignore you begging when you completely lost me
I picture, picture of smiles in hundred different files when I was talking about you holding me then
now one of us is smiling, piling up memories, checking in and out then
I see him, walk past me in a disguise; I know what he tries, never look me in the eyes.

Love is such a funny thing
Or at least it is when it comes from you
In my eyes you were a king
I didn't have a clue

I will never forget the pain
Caught in your web of lies
Playing your games with my brain
While my hope dies

Stabbing me in the back only to come and save me
Ripping me apart
And the silence in my plea
The dying in my heart

I hope I never see you again, that you're **** alone
Rot in your misery while I rebuild my throne

Friend: a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection.

In some instances, we do not choose who we are going to be friends with. It just kind of.. happens. We may be sitting alone reading a book or staring off into nothingness, and then someone walks right up to you. You don't know if you are going to be friends with this stranger. Sure, they could be attractive, have a nice personality based on what you see and hear from others.

But when that first conversation starts, there is no way back to peace and life without them.

From stranger to a weight that keeps pulling you down.
"Get rid of them! If they cared about you, they would take the time to talk." , says my brain and logic. "They have feelings too! They're really nice!", says my heart. "What did they ever do to you?"

Nothing. They did nothing.

Friends don't back-stab you, or ignore you. They don't ignore what you say or send to them. It doesn't matter how weird or inappropriate you act or speak, as long as you know where the boundaries are and you have a good heart and soul.

As Snow White takes a bite out of a poisonous apple, I too have had my share of poison apples that continue to stay by my side.

© 2018 Omni Winters