To be happy.
Not to be sad.
To be loved.
Not to be hurt
To enjoy life.
Not to be stuck.
To be free.
Not to be stressed out.
To be drama free.
Not to be weak.
To do things that make me happy.
Not pleasing others.
To be a leader.
Not a follower.
To be Me.
Not to be someone else.
To be kind
Not to be rude to others.
To live my life.
Not living someone else life.
To keeping my faith.
Not feeling sorry for myself.
To understand more.
Not to be mistreated.
To control my life.
Not let someone take over.
To rebuild
Not tear myself down.
To travel the world.
Not to stay still.
To hold my own.
Not to **** my dream.
To make things happen.
Not to fall behold.
To listen to myself.
Not to run away.


It's my turn to do what makes me happy, and not worry about what makes other people happy.

To be strong.
Too proud of who I am.
To let go of the pain.
To stop crying.
To be patient.
To be

nobody knows
the troubles
you've seen

nobody knows them all,
maybe some here/there,
scattered pebbles, strung together in a too tight choker,
as if two hands grasping your  gasping neck,
as if you needed a reminder
of your own hands in slow mo,
cutting off of the oxygen supply,
to merest trickle,
the insufficient
be well

hell
no one knows the precision past,  decision nature
of thine owned Sisyphus boulder,
the one you alone shoulder

so you grin~grimace inside,
when they sincere, but casually bell,
un-beknowning, un-thinking
wishing you one mo' time,
an extra seasonal

be well
~
ah, well intentioned,
but you're getting older,
tireder from the loader,
each time it's tossed your way,
falling to the pitted bowls bottom
all these
be well wishes

it's like a glass of water trying to
fill a well mostly dry,
quench a bonfire of exhaustion,
that only grows stronger,
feeding on its own inexhaustible supply
of good wishes innocently poisoning

I have two* sons.

I hope they

be well