Mi' Padre' was stabbed in a bar fight.
The cantina is the deepest of wells.
Mi' Madre' put mi' ropa in la mochila.
La pandillas tiene mi' hermano - He fell.

Madre' sold her finest of silver
To buy maquillaje to color my face.
She said, "Better that you should have her"
To the man who had come from The United States.

Yo era una nina novia.
El era un hombre mayor.
I wanted to run away fast, go back home,
But nothing was there for me anymore.

I was but only sixteen.
I had never been touched before.
There I was in such a new land,
Our cothes crumpled on the floor.

The whole time I kept my eyes closed.
I longed for mi' familia and home.
He held me and slumbered when it was over.
My tears were hot and I felt so alone.
.
Yo era una nina novia.
El era un hombre mayor.
I wanted to run away fast, go back home,
But nothing was there for me anymore.

I was told to learn to speak English.
To abandon the language I knew.
I did not speak of my heritage,
It was better that I was kept from view.

I learned to cook like an American wife,
And soon I could speak like the rest.
It was difficult, but I learned how to fit in.
I even changed the way that I dressed.

Yo era una nina novia.
El era un hombre mayor.
I wanted to run away fast, go back home,
But nothing was there for me anymore.

These days, I spend keeping shop,
When the children are still at the school.
They are the heart of my life.
They are named Sally and Raul.

The nights are the hardest to get through.
I still dream of my other life,
Before I was given to my husband.
But I love him now, I am his wife.

But,
I remember when -

Yo era una nina novia.
El era un hombre mayor.
I wanted to run away fast, go back home,
But nothing was there for me anymore.

I met a man who cried at a bar.
He told me he mourned, and travelled from far.
So I bought a bottle and he drank with me,
As he regailed me his memory.

"I'm waiting for you, Dear, alone in the dark.
You're dieing, they've told me,
It rips me apart.
You bravely are holding your fear at the start,
As I cry alone in the dark.

I've come to your bedside because you've been ill,
Since the cold winter morning you first felt the chill.
I'm waiting for Jesus to make you alright.
I plead for you not to die.

I ache for the sight of your watery eyes.
I hear you breathing, it sounds like good-bye.
This is a moment I'll relive and cry.
My beautiful songbord has died.

Wait for me, wait for me
on the other side wait for me
wait for me, wait for me
wait for me, wait for me."

she stood outside the apartment
finger halfway up her nose
scratching with her free hand
a **** loosely encased
in patchy, ***** blue jeans
ratty sneakers with holes where
her toes and dignity poked through

usually a whiner, a brayer
a donkey among gently purring cats
calling down thunder and racket
like a motorcycle tearing circles through a lamp shop

today, of all days, she swayed

silently
in loose waltz time
to soft piano of a long-dead Frenchman
curling down from speakers
mounted in windows
across the street

her misshapen hips and flexing calf muscles
lifting her up in a rude en pointe
somehow made elegant
by a quiet ballad, a soothing moment
on a hot August morning
in Main Street
of the hinterlands.

2/12/2015

You wrote songs for me,
You’d give everything for my heart.
A month went by,
We could no longer stand being apart.

You made the trip to see me,
And took my breath with your kiss.
We were so in love,
How the hell did it come to this?

You knew I was weak,
And couldn’t stand being alone.
Without you nothings right,
You were my only home.

I got scared when the night came,
I needed you so bad, and you weren’t there.
Sitting here tearing myself apart.
Screaming prayers but I knew you wouldn’t care.

You weren’t there and it broke my heart,
You promised me you’d always be.
You said you were going to get me out of here.
You said you still loved me but I couldn’t see.

I thought love was supposed to heal,
And for a while it did.
If this is love, how could it hurt so bad?
I told you to leave, you said “take care of yourself kid”.

And you’re probably right,
It wasn’t our time.
But how could I “take care”
When you weren’t mine?

It came down to the fact
Being with you hurt just as bad
As being without you.
I’m trying to forget everything we had.

Because the memories are what hurt the most,
We were kids high from love, some stupid kid.
I need to forget so I can live again,
But life won’t be the same, if we end up like this.

You made me say “forever”,
When you said “always”.
I still hope forever will happen,
I really thought it would end up that way.

Maybe I’ve been stupid,
Just some heartbroken fool.
A naïve idiot,
But now I cry at school.
I can’t get through a day,
Without wishing you were here.
Without feeling so lost I can’t breathe.
I know I ****** it up with my fear.

“Don’t beat yourself up”,
But I’m overcome with guilt.
Beating myself up is what I do best.
I thought I could stop it with the wall I built.

But you got in my veins,
I don’t know how it happened.
I was so careful,
But this is the end.

Isn’t it?
Or will you be back?
Please keep your promise,
I need it so bad.

I need stability,
But this love is ******* crazy.
Euphoria and pain,
But it’ll be okay, maybe?