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ayesha roleyes Aug 2017
a therapist
prescribed me rose-tinted glasses.
she told me
my view was too blue and the pink
would counteract my countenance
so i would
finally
see normally.
a “shift of perspective”
she called it. i didn’t
tell her that the color i saw wasn’t blue, it was gray; i didn’t
tell her i had fifty pairs at home, perched pristinely on the vanity; i didn’t
tell her i pressed them onto my nose and stared into the mirror; i didn’t
tell her the only shift of perspective
was the way the world
became blurry,
water welling up and
flinging a flimsy filter
onto my mirror when
i realized this wasn’t working,
this wouldn’t work.

instead, i smiled
and added another pair to my collection –
this time,
it was different. this time,
when i put them on and
nothing changed,
i convinced myself that it did.
i swore i saw swirls of scintillating salmon in the sky,
swore sunrise was less montonous and sunset less muted.
“it’s gonna get better, it’s better, i’m better” ran through
my mind, up
my throat, out
my mouth and swirled
in the air and coated every surface until
my breath was reduced
to those words:
it’s gonna get better, it’s better, i’m better.

and each day battered the words,
each hour chipped away at their strength,
each minute batted them out of the air until
i was lightheaded from oxygen deprivation, stuck
gasping with a gaping mouth in a vacuum.

when i shattered my rose-tinted glasses
and used the shards to carve
two neat little lanes up my forearms, when
i smeared the rivulets of
blood across my eyes –
because a pink filter hadn’t worked, but maybe,
maybe red would –
i whispered to myself:
it’s gonna get better, it’s better, i’m better.
ayesha roleyes Aug 2017
i wonder if i
will ever dedicate love
poems to someone
Jas Aug 2017
Why can't I be in control?
At night I rake my eyes across the sky and see the moon shiver
Then, I always know.

But why when the sun takes morning shift do I forget?
The war drum sirens signal fire -
My body hasn't caught up with it yet.

I'm not "happy to have forgotten you."
My inner peace arose from beneath heavy rain fall
My mind is stagnant and taunt
It carries hazy reminders of voices raised, killing each other

Yes, I remember you.
I just prefer to keep it void of color and let all else burn vividly.
silent

pulled chain click        
stillness

cold air
no crickets              

bedsheets
stale

ceiling fan
still

stagnant fan
no click                    
no pull chain

nothing you can do to move air

left un-         -comfortable

still
yellow wallpaper

wide
adderall eyes
coma
eyes
grey
eyes
dull ***
eyes
*** worker
eyes
hospice
eyes
disembodied
dissociative
upper-rexic
still wood
eyes
watch
the fan
watch the still
fan
you
fan             
watch                          
still                                          


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J Jul 2017
You
i wish so desperately to find solace in
You
i want to believe in You wholeheartedly
but for some reason
i cannot
i was raised to follow You and believe in
You
but i feel You have left me in the dark
i am trying to see Your light through the forest
but i cannot
i don't feel Your love the way i once did
You don't touch me the way You used to as i kneeled before You on sundays
i know You are real and the Son is real
but i am having a hard time understanding why i am here
and why my prayers have gone unanswered
You have a purpose for me
but what is it?
CPM Jul 2017
i have traded my self love
for his i love you

i had no idea i was covering up
his own insecurities with
ever bit of affection and forgiveness i had left.

countless times have i mistaken
his jealousy for thinking i was loved.
i didn't know that jealousy
was a prison he voluntarily stays in.
i didn't know i was already held captive
until he dangled the key right in front of me.

- *CPM
Aaron LaLux Jul 2017
2017 Self Manifestation

It’s 2017,
publishing my 7th book this year,
probably my 8th as well,
it’s 2017,

this is the year of Self Manifestation,
of the Personal-Realization of Other’s Existences,
even though it still feels like this is a Still Dream Matrix,
and somehow I’m on the side of The Resistance,

except I’m not resisting,
I’m going with the flow,
so when someone asks me if we’re living in a Dream world,
I just shrug my shoulders shake my head and say “I don’t know.”,

but really,
I suspect that we are,
but I’m a suspicious person by nature,
but maybe I’m wrong,

maybe no one is out to get you,
maybe you’re your own worst enemy,
maybe you’re your own best friend,
maybe nothing exists not even maybes,

don’t call me Baby,
don’t be so cliche,
this isn’t 1900 whatever,
this is 2017,

It’s 2017,
publishing my 7th book this year,
probably my 8th as well,
it’s 2017,

this is the year of Self Manifestation,
of the Personal-Realization of Other’s Existences,
even though it still feels like this is a Still Dream Matrix,
and somehow I’m on the side of The Resistance,

and at the same time also corporately complicit,
completely addicted to my electronic devices,
in fact the fact is the way I act you could say my devices are my vices,
see these days we don’t worship Isis we worship Apple and all that iSh!t hypeness,

that’s right isn’t it kid,
now go on now run along and tell ‘Ol Father Time,
that it’s 2017 and even though it’s almost the end of the line we’re doing just fine,
still writing away otherwise wasted time combining divine lines and making it all rhyme,

I’m,
publishing my 7th book this year,
probably my 8th as well,
it’s 2017…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

from the # best selling poetry book '777'
available worldwide: www.amazon.com/dp/1548700746
Jake Brannon Jul 2017
One day I stopped,
I looked at the person who has no friends,
The person that you pass and just give that look,
The verbal abuse they receive behind their back,
It hurts!
He was broken
He knew what was said
He felt like nobody cared.
Next time, if you see that boy...
Stop and think: Will what I do hurt?
Stop and give them your time.
Stop the nasty comments!
After all, they hurt!
Pat Adamek Jul 2017
All the pages of the calendar ran past
The fingers, arms, and face and the second counting hand
And for a second, I thought I had a real life plan
Then it turned out real life had a plan
I don't understand
Why
On the third time, these birthdays, for the first time
No head in the sand
I feel like a hundred grand saying "I am who I am"
Even without ionic, atomic, nuclear clocks ticking
I can feel I'm gaining time as the plot continues tricking
my mind and skin are thickening as I continue picking
and pricking the skin, like queen mab said
This world is a dream, sometimes its a nightmare
I'm happy, it seems, having something to share
A tradition I started a few years back to work out a poem on my birthday
Found on the date of nine – two – three – two – oh – one – seven -
Barely more than one month after the grand eclipse of heaven
The revised twelve stars of Leo crown the head of the ******.
In her land of milk and honey, her labors merge in.

Jupiter encircles the womb while within the Holiest of gastronomes.
Mercury, Mars and Venus conjoined with Leo’s nine making the dozen.
Seventy-five days prior the New City’s Trumpet has merged with Put In
Calling for Levant’s retribution which will divide ancient Ebian within.

The ******’s head newly crowned with the temporal twelve stars of Leo,
At her feet quiver the sun and moon awaiting the arrival of Palladio.
She being with child cries in the pain to deliver.
The earth quickens the mystery in perfected position, as both quiver.

Nine months prior the consummation completed by NATO’s resolution
Casting out the promised land – this is real – this is not the imagination.
Jubilee last appeared on the eave of the six day war
Marked by half centuries, Jubilee returns this year once more.

The revelations of tribulation are set by a single star that does always appear
Every two thousand years and four thousand years ago it founded Israel.
Two thousand years ago this same star led the three kings to the king of all kings.
This star is visible for two years and appeared in September two thousand and fifteen.

And yet another sign appears in the heavens: behold a great fiery Red Kachina
Having seven followers and ten outcasts with seven headbands in the arena.
The Red Kachina drawing in a third of the stars, hurling them toward the earth.
This Kachina standing at the ******’s feet waiting for her to give up the birth.

The Red Kacina’s vile evilness waiting to consume Jupiter’s birth failing
To devour the newborn who is to lead all nations with a rod of iron.
But the child remains in the heavens with it’s mother to feed grazed
By the Red Kachina for one thousand two hundred and twenty six days.
Do you believe in prophecy. I'm not sure that I do. All I can tell you is that I have these dreams. I get up and try to write them down. I've decided to share some of them. You can find many of the words in this piece in Revelation in the Bible if you care to take the time to look them up and read them.
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