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Sadie Grace May 2020
I walked a mile searching for the sunset
but couldn't quite find it
the storm clouds tried to cover
the trees tried to hide
the darkness tried to smother it

but I still found slivers of color and beauty
covered in clouds
hidden behind trees
smothered by darkness
but still alive
still visible

is this what grief looks like?

darkness slowly eclipsing the beauty of life
Sadie Grace May 2020
There's life in this pen beyond what someone will read

They only see the pretty, cleaned up, typed out version of my thoughts

This is the battlefield where they go to war

This paper will take the hits, absorb the impacts, and survive

Your mind might not
Our friendship might not

But my hand will keep dancing across the pages
Originally this was written in my notebook.
Sadie Grace May 2020
She wished to paint with watercolors
because they bled all over the paper
Like her emotions bled all out of her wrists
but never out of her mouth

She wished there was a way to be beautiful
and still tell the truth of her messy, wild life

She was reaching for her razor blade
When the watercolors called to her
There is a better way
There is an easier way than this, they whispered
She wanted to believe it
but didn't know if it was worth the risk
didn't want to look weak

There was no pain involved in this new way
Only beauty bleeding from her heart
Instead of her skin
Was it worth it?
to leave paint stains rather than scars on her arms
Sadie Grace May 2020
I sleep when the sun does
to hide from the dark in a fortress of sleep
But running doesn't make it go away
only more traumatic when you have to face it
I sleep when the sun does
missing the beauty of the stars
They speak a language I can’t understand
A language I might never learn
If I'm scared of the dark
Sadie Grace Apr 2020
The sun says just as much in its presence as in its absence
A beautiful escape from the sky
How could endings be so graceful?
As the fire goes out, the passion dies
I lay here believing that there’s more out here
In the dark, there is still light
In the night, stars come out
They are much brighter, much more genuine than our inventions  
Artificial could never replace the real thing
Although the sunset is beautiful and the night of stars are beautiful,
There is always some awful grey in between
based on time spent watching the sunset
Sadie Grace Apr 2020
If the night is long
Look up at the stars
If the night is lonely
Look around in the dark
& start to realize you don't belong here
You're not alone here
The dark is not your home
So don't settle down here
You will be found here
You're not alone here
If pain is here
Your Savior's near
Knowing the whole story, he walked into the dark
yet made it out
Knowing your heart was full of doubt, shame, and self-inflicted pain,
He still went through with the plan to forgive
So I can live beyond the grave
There is life beyond the grave holding my plans, future, & sense of control
This night is long
But I'm not out here on my own
I'm not out here alone
Though darkness seems like home
I'M NOT OUT HERE ALONE
Sadie Grace Apr 2020
Even if your world is falling apart
I hope you take care of that precious heart
Feed it truth
Feed it love
Feed it forgiveness
When the season is over, look back and see
In all this illness
There was growth
In all this sickness
There was hope
For one day, you will see again
One day you will breathe again
And one day we will meet again
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