He's got an eye for storms so he walks right in
A Bible in one hand
And in the other a sin
Torn between who he wants to be
With everyone else pushing and prodding
He doesn't know who to believe
He's the guy at the party with the drink in his hand
Rambling about how guilty he is
But drinking as much as he can

A walking contradiction
A Bible in one hand
And in the other a sin
He can't feel the world around him
So he tears himself apart just searching
For anything that means something
A word or a song or a remedy
A book or a person or just maybe
An identity

like an animal waiting to pounce,
the effects are disastrous
and tough to undo.
she’s dying to be noticed,
dying to be loved.
she’s crying at night,
it’s her lullaby.
there’s a mask on her face
that hides all the worry,
locks all the pain inside.
when you look into her eyes,
look into her soul.
don’t stop just on the surface.
she’s crying inside and asking herself,
why can’t anyone hear me?

i want your garden
sprout from the earth
breathe you in
consume all of you

i want to feel
green in my feet
in between my toes
it can't be beat

the sweetest smell
it's like the fuel
i know it all
a little too well

the warm embrace
what is this place?
it seems you've left
without a trace

who are you now
you've left me again
i feel the fear inside
purer than the water
that brought us here
it's beginning to get to me

Then the tears came flowing
Pouring down her face
And the release in relinquishing her pain into the open,
Even if it was her alone in her room,
Brought a stillness of peace
At least, the closest thing to it she'd felt in a while
And so she wrote and she wrote and she wrote
Hoping it would take the pain out of her and onto the paper instead
Let her make sense of it all
And figure out what to do.
But no help came and the picture remained muddled
So with her tear stained cheeks she curled up to sleep
Praying it would be her last

I wake up in the morning and think, how rude of me to wake up without warning. Because I'm a grenade. Just look at all of the promises I've made, that I know I can't keep. I try my best to go back to sleep; but I can't.
       So I dress myself in yellow caution tape, close the drapes, turn out the light and tell myself no one will find me here but I know they might.
       I hang a stop sign on the outside of the door and lock it, put the key in my otherwise empty pocket and scream, "This is a danger zone, don't come near. there is only hazardous waste in here!"

             I didn't know you were fearless.
Or that you could break down a door.
Never  thought you'd caress me, pick me up off the floor
and say "But, you used to be so full of life."
Those words cut through me like a knife because I remember when butterflies still lived in my stomach and fireflies lived in my eyes.
they're dead now. I'm not surprised.
But, could you maybe bring them back to life?
They haven't taken flight since we slept in the meadow that night.
When I realized, after all those hours laying in a field of flowers,
That I am the flower you disassemble Petal by Petal.
as you chant "she loves me, she loves me not."  about some other girl. And I try not to rant, because we've never fought. But I don't want to listen to you tell me how her hair glistens in the sun, or how she bites her lip when you call her Hon. I don't want to hear it. I don't want you to give my biggest fear a name or face I could recognize. I'm just hoping you scrutinized me petal by petal as you disassembled my petals with another ******* your mind. and that's why you're back now. That you don't know how, but your thoughts trailed or that other girl failed you. And while you were moping you thought of me broken, scattered Petal by Petal. And your heart shattered at the thought so you bought a one way ticket and broke down my door. Because you realized while you were moping that you love me and you were stupid before. maybe i'm wrong and you shouldn't have to settle.

I'm just hoping,  you'll put me together again Petal by Petal
© copyrighted *Nicole Ann Osborn

I was trying to apply for a student credit card
But everyone kept denying me
We didn't know why.
Today I was told my identity was stolen
I wasn't too surprised
It's funny, I've been saying that I haven't felt like myself for years,
I guess I really haven't been...

I am a grenade in his arms
burning, fire destructive
still He holds me

I am a lost stream of strange desires
of sin and sorrow and addiction
still, He is with me

I am a beast that no-one wants to love
a home built in caves of shadows and darkness
still He sees me

His love is an avalanche,
His forgiveness meant death,
His power is God.

Who is like you Jesus?