The Sun has kept His every word He ever said to me
so here I am relearning to accept what I can’t see
my eyes have tempted every day without my own consent
but now that I have closed them all my fears have up and left
my body is no longer now the way that it once was
(a flower in a field to be picked up by anyone)
I laid myself on soil no one possibly could find
where I can be at peace in every corner of my mind

I've set aside a piece of time to keep until the end
And right before I am no more I'll push it through a pen
But if you don't believe a single word I've ever said
I cannot try to change your mind, I cannot raise the dead

It's not within my power to restore this flesh and bone
And I can only hope that when I leave I'm not alone
I want it to be simple but I want it to be true
The way of letting go of all the ones I ever knew

But in my final seconds as I breathe my very last
I realize my future's an extension of my past
It's just as I remember - nothing new and nothing good
The time that I had kept was only keeping what I could

you don't wanna be like them
not even they do

A color I could never see I found inside of you
the deepest parts of us reflected every shade of blue
Depending on the moment I would speak in melodies
that I could never carry were you not right here with me
And even though our days have led us miles far apart
I find you in the chorus of the beat within my heart
The chords I scribed in blood because I've nothing left to give
"I want to break the silence," said her Spirit to my skin

If I could trade my eyes today I'd trade them with the Sun
to wake up with the world and greet another morning come
I'd watch the shadows bathe beneath the warmth of every ray
I'd float upon the waters in the gentlest of ways
and if the clouds delivered Latter Rain upon us all
then I would be returned the eyes exchanged to watch it fall
I'd never want to miss the chance to see beyond this life
to reconcile my body with the source of Truth and Light

there's just enough of everything for all of us to see
the beauty of the stars as they reflect in you and me
let dust upon our feet be settled everywhere we go
wholeheartedly received in Truth that everyone may grow
the seeds within our bones are secrets none of us should keep
so let the flowers bloom and plant their roots in deepest deep
respond to every petal while it lives and when it dies
remember why it laid to rest but found a way to rise
there's nothing but a parallel to draw from all of this
two lines forever moving, never crossed, they never kissed

eighteen years of patience
have carried you through
made one of a body
that used to be two
the womb you were given
was meant to be shared
make room for each other
and Life will take care
[of every moment
I cannot be there]
together you got here
together you'll go
back into your mother
again to be sewn

I went out for a walk today and asked the sky to speak
and every word I recognized changed everything in me
my eyes became the keepers of a message in clouds
and now I can’t go anywhere I cannot see and doubt
my mind can go in circles or in any kind of shape
as long as I can hear You then I know I’m still awake
forgiven every absence and forgotten every fall
I walk into Your Presence like I never left at all

Alone at last, the story goes
But in her head she's on her toes
As thoughts begin to paint the end
There's nothing left to comprehend
It's here and now and then and there
It's everything that's everywhere
The book is me, the book is you
The words are everything we do
They're in the sea and if you swim
you'll have to fight with every limb
And when you're scattered in the deep
you need to bring yourself to speak
For what is good will not forsake
So carry, give and never take
Let go of all you'll ever own
you weren't made to be *alone

What if our projections are of aid to someone else
what if what we say delivers someone to the well
would you spread your words as though they didn't mean a thing
Or would you make an effort to believe the opposite
grown tired of the oceans we have poured and swallowed up
The fishes we are swimming with have duly had enough
And now that we are drowning, altogether almost gone
where are all the pillars we have ever stood upon
while everything dishonest walks behind your every step
the footprints you could see once mock uncertainty in death
and when it's running faster as your breath's becoming short
you may not find yourself again the way you did before

I couldn't keep my hands from holding tighter on to you
to use myself to weigh you down was all that I could do
and now the time has passed us by without a single stop
I still do not know what we are, I know what we are not
when you became familiar in the strangest kind of way
I had to take a step aside, I knew I'd gone astray
my feet have stumbled long enough for me to walk again
and every insecurity I had is lying dead
we cannot resurrect ourselves, we shouldn't even try
for one of us is more alive and so the other, dies
continue on without the weight of me inside your thoughts
my hands are holding nothing but the air that I once fought

I used to be good at believing
the life that I lived wasn’t real
but now that it’s nearly December
my bones are too cold not to feel
I used to pretend I was dreaming
enough to escape my own thoughts
but now that my eyes are not closing
I have not had the sleep that I ought
I used to await conversation
give meaning to moments in speak
but now that my tongue has been broken
I have nothing but Silence to seek

how suddenly, “used to’s,” start dying
when none of them bear any weight
and out comes The Time to remind you
I Was Then, I Am Now, by your Faith

I broke your heart and you broke my head
You traded me in for another stranger's bed
Did it make things right inside your mind
To have me out of sight and running out of time
What did you think this was, some kind of stone
That only you could throw but never leave alone
The red of dawn rises in your cheeks
And I can see the sun as you begin to speak
Fire breaths again, hot upon your tongue
As you reject the love of almost everyone
Where nothing is you will always be
The end of your own road, the end of
memory

I'm testing out the boundaries of the pitches I can make
The cacophonic melodies are keeping me awake
And if I had control of what I ever heard before
The noise I hear today is never welcome anymore
My ear is now an oracle I cannot comprehend
The skin around a part of me I verily offend
Repeatedly defying every thought I ever had
I wonder if I'll realize the moment I go mad

i wish that i could tell you everything you need to hear, a sound coherent message that would travel through your ears

i know that if I listen you will tell me what to say, and so i close my eyes, begin to speak without delay

the fear will neither stop me nor put needles in my mouth, and time is only present so I can't not let it out

i might be repetitious but that serves a purpose too, in marking like an accent all the necessary truths

so carry any lessons that belong inside your hands, and meet me at the corner where the ground is made of sand

for here you'll find the water that is buried but contained, and should you pass the cup to me I'll take in what remains

continue on ahead of me and I will watch your back, make note of any voices that can put you off your track

remember what you told me and then fight to not forget, the road may be unyielding but your walk's not finished yet

i can't remember the
last time i died to
myself

sodded with soil of dark turmoil
ready for the earthworms

I've painted in my mind the many things I cannot see
the stories in the roots that grow their lives into a tree
As every single season comes to harvest what it will
the organs of the sun remain intact forever still
And never mind a human's try to reap another's change
one cannot steal the soil back of which we all be made
A little bit of everything, a palette laid on skin
We water it forever or we dry it paper thin

open eyes that cannot seem
to grasp their own reality -

the word 'deserving' has a way of cutting in to me
For why do I suppose I should be handed out the key
I always lose the things I want to time I do not own
yet manage somehow to pretend I reap what I have sewn
There's someone watching over me forgiving what I've done
Reminding me I haven't lost my faith in anyone
Replacing fear with perfect love I've kept inside my heart
I know I will be broken but I will not fall apart
So here's to all the people I may never see again
You've made me in to something more than I could ever pen

where do you go when you are out of your head
when all of the noise draws you far from your bed
when so many people are blocking your view
and all you can say is, “I’m looking for You”

where is your body when you run out of Soul
when is too much and what leads you to let go
and when is The Answer too close to your heart
for you to receive it with all that you are

and when do your worries turn into the norm
to keep you from wanting to’ve ever been born
when is the Sun going to shine the right way
and what will it take to make you be okay?

if I tell you that I regret nothing
then My Conscience has entered the room
He has already taken my choices
and remade with them all I can do

if I tell you that I am not perfect
then My Conscience is saving my life
He has already bled for my body
and today He sowed Peace in my mind

if I tell you that I will not judge you
then My Conscience is reaping the sow
He has already answered my question
“Who are You that You know how to know?”