⚠Trigger Warning; the following poem contains subject matter pertaining to self-harm and suicide ⚠
____________________
­The envelope
(delivered just this morning)
splits in his attempt
to tear away its wax seal
where her very breath still wanders.

Inside,
he finds a razor blade--
upon being removed
from its paper hostel,
it glints prismatically
in the Autumn sun--
and a neatly-pressed letter
accompanied by an overwhelming
medley of scents--
parchment;
mint lip balm;
*****;
it still smelled like her.

With butterflies rising like bile
up his throat,
he unfolds the letter,
reading over her
spidery handwriting
several times before
her words fully percolate:

"Do not return to sender--
she's already dead."

We who have touched the heights of ecstasy,
See fantasies become reality,
Swimming out to sea as far as we dare,
Have to experience the depths of despair,
Living on the edge of a nightmare,
Not knowing what can be lurking there.

Such is our lot – the souls that climb the heights!
Shall we call it a blessing or a blight?
Living near the edge of insanity…
Joy is heaven – sorrow the bitter sea.
Between ecstasy and agony,
Our dreams become our reality.

I wonder what it's like
to be a tree in a storm.
To have settled roots,
that hold you steady.
To have grown so high,
and progressed so much.

I wonder what  it's like
to be a tree in a storm.
Having to bend and lean
with the comings of the wind.
Having to feel parts of you
leave.

I wonder what it's like
to be a tree in a storm.
Everything could be taken
with a single bolt of passion.
Or to have to be on edge
for the hurricane season.

I live the life
of a tree in the storm.
But, I must say, it's worth it all
just for the thrill of the fall.

What good are we
in flesh and bone
when we ignore
the wisdom of the songs
flowing in the blood
beating from our hearts

what good are we
in flesh and bone
when we walk
through troubled times
as nothing more than ghosts

as the moment pass by,
                                       like how you passed me by
i saw your eyes
                          gaze through the sky,

as i look at you
                          i cant help but feel
the feelings i have for you
                                           oh how i wanted to say them to you

as the day turns into night
the sun goes down, the moon goes up
still cant get over how beautiful you were
when you were looking at the sky
now every time i look up
it reminds me of your beautiful blue eyes
just like the sky.