There are so many people I thought that I could trust
But they all tell my secrets like it’s the daily news
As if their life depended on it, as if they really must
Don’t any of them have anything remotely better to do?

I write to let out my feelings, all of them at once
Since nobody wants to listen, nobody even cares
Everywhere I go I’m met with thick unfriendly silence
But once people find out, it’s the latest sick affair

And they talk about me like I’m a bad disease
All I wanted was some solace and the impossible peace
In my small little mind, because that doesn’t exist out here
I want to feel free, but I have so much that I fear

If someone else finds out, it’s another juicy story
I can’t cope with this, although the world is temporary
It will be over soon, but how long will it take?
For people to accept me and the choices that I make?

But what is worst of all is that I don’t know which one
Of these liars had started this never-ending war
They always seem to be in need of my thin ceasing blood
Waiting like hungry dogs for a possible taste of more

I try to be patient and I try to at least be kind
Try to soothe myself and earn a peace of mind
It’s not like they deserve it, but I’m better than my foes
I don’t pretend and smile for the sake of petty shows

My rule is that if you’re nice to me, then I’ll be nice to you
It’s not that complicated, but people don’t even try
And if you want to start over, then I’d be happy to
But real friends don’t backstab or tell each other lies

I’m missing you like the drought misses rain
A drug that keeps feeding me this bittersweet pain
It lives in my soul, draining me of joy
What once was beautiful has now been destroyed

I’m missing you like the snow misses sun
Where light had once flourished, now there’s just none
A darkness that drowns me in melancholy and sorrow
I was such a fool for giving you my heart to borrow

I’m missing you like the night misses day
But no matter what happens, it’ll always find a way
The world will keep turning; the sun will shine again
A cycle for a billion years, I’ll miss you even then

But this has all been a daydream of strayed and mindless thoughts
I’m reminiscing like a fool, while you’ve probably forgot
Do you even miss me? Do I even want to know?
It wouldn’t be as painful as having to see you go  

And I’ll still be missing you like a beautiful sin
With the guilt inside of me where my heart had once been
You never returned it, don’t know where it might be now
Perhaps destroyed or buried, I’ll love you anyhow

Only once has love ever opened my wrist,
Twice more with a rope, my neck has been kissed.
Three panic attacks on the floor of the shower,
Six nights have I wished to see my last hour.

Everyday she walks alone
Keeping her head bowed down
But she knows she's a princess
With an imaginary crown

One day she met a boy
She thought whom was the one
Made her promises of forever
Asked for everything but none

But colors fade away
So did her perfect guy
He found someone 'better'
Left without any 'goodbye'

Now her heart was broken
She walks alone again
Left with nothing but memories
Of a boy she loved back then.


© Leigh Herondale  *January 2015

It's worth all the waiting, it's worth all the pain
It's worth all the tragedy 'cause it led me to your way
It's worth all the heartaches that killed me inside
I found my self reborn when you stayed right by my side

I thought we won't make it for tomorrow but look where we're now
You've shed light on my sorrows and saved the pieces of me somehow
You brought new perspective of how I look about my life
And I found my self looking at you and every who I am is now enough

You've never asked me to change, you just wanted who all I am
You've never asked me to be someone else, you just let me to be the same
You've chose to love me, the whole I am without asking me in return
I don't know what you've found in me but I'm grateful that I have you for my own

Thank you for every who you are and for all you've imparted to me
Thank you for my simple life has turned to be amazing with thee
Thank you for the crazy moments, for laughters and even for unwordly times
We can use different words on how we are feeling but only you can make it rhyme

There is no need to tell anyone, we don't have to tell the world
Because we have what cannot be touched by anyone, sometimes cannot be described by words
And we cannot pleased everyone that all we have is real
'Cause this feeling is supernatural and every moment with you is surreal

I will treasure every inch of you, I will memorize the sound of your voice
Of how you whisper to my ear that you'll be always here even on the worst
You and your love is evidently enough to lift me up above the sky
We will face anything with our hands together and every memories will be you and I.

I never got the chance to write something for you
Never had the way of showing that you are my truth
Never in my dreams that we will be in this way
Time has separated us, and we can’t bring it back today

Sorry for I let this world took my life that fast
Sorry for I let my soul die, sorry I can’t go back
I just let this love slid away from my hands
I just let my everything be nothing now in my mind

I am sorry for I never had the intentions to save my life for you
I am sorry for I loved you and trusting all my love to you
I’m sorry for I made you be my world without asking your permission
Blame should be to me for I loved you without inhibitions

I am unconditionally in love, and now maybe I was
I am perfectly engaged, but the thread has just loosen its tight
I am kind of disoriented, and the fragments are all over again
Don’t worry I saved something for myself, but death is just one breath away

Pain is rushing down in me, tears are flowing out my eyes
Trying to be in my best content, trying to stand with a guise of smile
But I just let go of forever, cause forever is now just a word
It isn’t now an adjective of us, it is where we must have been belong

I just can’t let you to come back, for you chose to go away
I can’t keep fighting for this love for you just let it out our way
But I am saving all your memories ‘cause I’ve already made our future
I just have to erase it now ‘cause we had just lost each other

As I lay myself to rest, where I know I will be at peace
I will be somewhere in your past, I will be at ease
I will be looking down to you, I will be always at your side
Please remember me, whenever you can’t feel your heart

I hope that someone new will be good to you
I hope you will also feel the love I used to offer you
I hope you’ll never feel any resentment like what I feel for myself right now
I can’t hate you, I’m just sad for the world is unfair again somehow

And now there is no you and me, but please don’t forget
Somehow I know we were real, we gave all our best
We laughed most of the time, but the time just don’t permit us for long
You took your love away, and I just have to let my love go on

I never had the chance to write something beautiful for you
Never had the way of showing that you are my endless truth
Never could imagine that I am alone again in love
Hope someday I can love again unconditionally, I hope I can go back.

Helps me get my work complete
His awards are daily blessings as a treat
I don’t have to worry about a days paid
It is praise all the way
I can have all the overtime I want
My responsibility of salvation, glory and holiness
My experience is my witness
I don’t have to worry about being fired
It’s Jesus that helps me to stay inspired
If I do something that isn’t right
God doesn’t get all up tight
It’s divine understanding in plain sight
No money needed to satisfy
It’s guidance from God in every try
I can pray all hours of the day
It’s a permanent job here to stay
A new day is a new experience
Energy applied with plenty of endurance
I never forget to get my glorified work done
Jesus is Lord and is number one
When the job seems tough
God understands when it is enough
A Boss every one should know
The Lamb’s voice being the show
My hours never have to be complete
It’s God’s blessings keeping me from deceit
A Boss I am proud to work for
His teachings are what I want to explore
His praise and Mercy are what I applaud.

Let me sink another glass of wine
To bring me closer to the divine
I don't mean a God of any kind
(If you're religious I hope you don't mind)
I mean the place inside of me,
Where I know lives good poetry