Maybe I've had my happiness
Maybe we only get one chance
Only one shot at our dreams
Why would the universe believe in us if we can't even believe in ourselves?
Maybe these things do take time
But perhaps my hourglass
has cracks in it's figure
And now the only thing running out
Is me

There's something beautiful
about sadness
and how there are no words
for the depth that you feel.
I never knew emptiness was a feeling and that loving someone
could be so **** painful.
I used to cry at
scraped knees and broken toys
but now I cry at
bruised hearts and void souls.
How can I heal
when you were my only antidote

It's been 1 month
and it pains me to breathe
and I'm trying to act like I'm okay
but I can't help but feel
all of my emotions at once
I don't know how I'll make it
without you by my side
I took a chance with you
what was I expecting
while bargaining with the devil?

It's been 2 months
it's like learning to walk all over again I'm still shaky
but I can stand on my own
I have a fear of falling and getting hurt but I do it anyway
because the world doesn't stop
for anyone
and I need to get a move on.

3 months have passed
and I have to pretend
that I don't notice that you're happier than you were with me.
You finally cut your hair
like I begged you to
and stopped biting your nails
I've taken up the occasional cigarette
to rid the taste of you on my lips.
It's nice to have something
inbetween my teeth than your tongue and feeling the stress leave faster
than you did.  

It's been 4 months
and I wake up
shaking and screaming your name until the echo soothes me
My dreams are haunted by you
and I can't escape you in my reality. I've dyed my hair
and changed mindset.
I'm not the naive ***** I was before.  
I don't let people walk over me
and tear me to shreds.

Half a year has gone by
and I'm still searching for something
to fill this void
I miss you terribly
and there's not enough drugs
in the world to give me the high
you gave me when we kissed
I saw someone who looked like you the other day and my heart froze
My initial reaction was to hide
I couldn't stand the thought
of you seeing me
and the look of disappointment
in your eyes
I didn't want to
hear how great your life has been
without me.

Luckily it wasn't you.
Unfortunately it wasn't you.

You were water
You drowned me with every kiss
And I had waves of missing you
That crashed against me
And dragged me back out into the bay
When you left
I went through a drought
And saw mirages of you everywhere
You're the only thing that can save me
I need you
But now the only thing
I have left to remind me of you
Is my tears
And the flooding of emotions
You left behind

Your Daddy's voice sounds like thunder
Your Daddy's fists strike like lighting
His torrential rains pull you down under
Nothing to a child's more frighting

You shouldn't have to face the weather
As once again you brave the storm
No amount of sunshine will make it better
When you know what's still to come

There's also the worry these storms carry
From one generation to the next
And a coming storm that's left alone
Will level all that's in it's path
Until there's nothing but the pain of the storm left

No one loves me
I'm not worth a single drop of blood

It would be wasted
If you spilt it for me

And dry your tears
For I'm the only one that has to cry

This time,
So there's no use shedding them for me

Sometimes, I wish I knew
How to disappear completely

So no one would remember my voice
Have no memories with me

I feel like life
Would merrily move along

If I were just simply
Gone
                     Gone

    Gone.

I loved you so
My darling beau
And I thought you loved me too

Until you stopped
And then I was dropped
On the floor with memories and tears

I adored you so much
But my grip you un-clutched
And entwined your hand with someone new

Now time has passed
Though my heart still is gashed
I finally feel hope again

Because though you hurt me
I finally feel free
Because I survived loving you.