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We were strong
But the world was stronger

The Earth can send violent storms
Massive waves
And unhinged ground
And it changes the landscape forever
Never to return to before

That's where we are  
You saw the storm of my hate
Felt the waves of my sadness
And the tremors of my soul as it broke
And now here we stand
On a new decimated land
And we can never go back to before
Not that I would ever want to go back.
Get a job,
a husband or wife.
Make yourself comfortable
in your own life.
So they tell me
or would have told me
if they were still alive.
But they are dying slowly
by the magic pills.
They are no longer there
to protect and care.
I no longer have devils
that whisper and scream.
They can do both
but now they are doing non.
And I can see myself having fun,
not caring or staring
into nothingness.
Yet it leaves me in mourning
to know they are about to die.
Maybe if I hold on a little longer
I won't be lonely and then find myself
a job, husband or wife.
 Dec 2018 Lance McDonald
Olivia
The world is a mirror
If you love it
You will receive love

But you must start at your mirror
If you love yourself
You will receive your love

I don't always love the world
Perhaps it doesn't always love me
But what I give I receive

I don't always love my reflection
It certainly despises me
But sometimes we get along rather nicely

I am trying to love the world
Ceaselessly
As it grows to love me
For we are one in the same

I am trying to love my reflection
Relentlessly
And it grows to love me
For we are one in the same.
i had no idea what love was
until it disappeared
or the joyful sound it made
until silence was all that i could hear
or the beauty that it held
in a single tear
i had no idea what love was
until love disappeared

i had no idea what love would take
until it was gone
took apart this wanting heart
left behind this weary soul
would i have let it get this far
if only i had known
i had no idea what love would take
until love was gone
.
So you snuggle in to your bed
as you hear mid-winter calling.
The cold north wind is blowing
as the last of Autumns leaves are falling.
Did you ever stop to think
as you pull up your blankets tight?
That out in the doorways of the city
desperate figures shiver in the night.
Crowding around the soup van
blue hands grasping for the heat.
Hallowed eyes and frightened expressions
as the rain turns to stinging sleet.
The concrete pavements are hard and cold
the bridges provide scant protection.
The hot food and volunteers words
stir memories into recollection.
Once they were people of society
with homes and jobs and cars and love.
Now they fight behind the charity shops
for clothes and coats and hats and gloves.
So as you snuggle deep in your bed
and your fire starts to burn low.
Remember the people of the streets
as the sleet begins to turn to snow.

Pagan Paul (Dec 2008) ©2016
This was the first poem I ever wrote.
Its from personal experience of being homeless for 3 months over winter 2008/2009.
PPx
.
I see her beautiful shape
laying still and quiet in our bed,
sleeping form curled around the pillow
on which I left my scent.
But I am a self made Ghost
and I saw her cry all day.
I am a shadow and feel nothing
and I left her because I loved her.

So I died,
by my own hands,
maybe soon,
she will understand.

I never deserved her, she deserved more,
so I showed myself to the leaving door.
Inside the darkness had begun to call,
step over the edge and start to fall.

Bereft of life, she found my shell,
screamed at me from the depths of Hell.
Tears streamed in gushing torrent
expressing a grief I did not warrant.

So in the ether I pen this note,
words can no longer leave my throat.
I left my love to set her free,
I couldn't keep her bound to me.

And whilst she gazes at my picture on the shelf,
may the Universe bless her not to blame herself.


© Pagan Paul (18/08/17)
.
A Note From The Ghost of a Successful Suicide
.
 Sep 2017 Lance McDonald
Barker
I know that feeling of being lost
I know that feeling that there is no one out there who understands
What you're going through and the emotions that you have

But listen to me
Hear these words that I'm about to say
I understand what you're going through
The emotions that you are feeling
I understand and I want to help

Because once ago
I was going through
The same thing
(c)Ibarker
 Sep 2017 Lance McDonald
Barker
The constant fight for equality
Black vs White
White vs Black
Religion vs Religion
Women vs Men
Men vs Women
Human vs Human
Why can't we see that we are all equal
(c)Ibarker
 Sep 2017 Lance McDonald
Seema
Knocked from all sides
My life halts from its ride
Watching the full rising tides
Remembering all the spoken lies

My entire world is slowly sinking
I've done all the thoughts and thinking
Venomous words sting right through my heart
Thus, it's best to take my own depart

A goodbye to this world, a goodbye to all
I've taken my step over to a waterfall
For all the five elements I call upon
Falling in the deep, I am forever gone!


©sim
Inspired by a frustrated person.
 Aug 2017 Lance McDonald
Seema
I want to be a bright star
In my own realm to hark
Way above the others
That shines in the dark

Bright like the morning sun
More than a diamonds spark
A one of its kind born
I want to leave a genuine mark

Tho, my hands can't reach,
The sky where the stars reside
Maybe oneday I might just greet
When my soul will finally abide...

©sim
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