Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
understand that we both have problems
understand that I've lost it too,
that ability

understand that the ability is retrievable
understand that ability to trust ; principle to lust

trust me

understand that jealousy is a beast that consumes me ; everyday
understand though,  that I shall slay it and display it for all to see
for all to understand

trust me

sometimes I don't understand either
but that's okay
because understanding isn't something that comes to you ; we must seek it

so

i dare you to trust me
i dare you to fall into my arms
i dare you to take that leap for i will jump with you

so

understand
understand that whatever happens i will try to understand
try to understand you ; us
try to understand it all

every fault
         weakness
                  crack
                       corner
                            weeping night or
                                      moment of ecstacy

everyday i learn
so i ask ; will you be my teacher?
I can understand
That every now and again
We all hurt and we cry
And some of us feel as though we might die
While others try and cross that line
But I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
How sometimes pain
Can be far too real
And we sometimes lie to ourselves
With wrists kissed by knives
But I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
That we get so wrapped
Up in the moments that we feel
Worthless, useless, lifeless
Then cry and ache inside
But I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
How we lose all faith
In hope for better days
And desire pills, *****, nooses
Blades, water. and bullets
But I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
The feeling of loneliness
And heartbreak
With pangs of woe, hatred, and self-loathe
And thoughts flooded with depression
But I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
Feeling as though I
Could never amount
To the person I need to be
And feeling like I should just let go
But I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
Feeling all this awful
Having all this pain
But what I can't understand is
How I don't know why we feel this
I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can understand
That I have a disease
That yes truly we are
Searching souls in need of light
But never reaching out for help
I can't stand it
So I sure as hell can't stand for it
I can't understand
Why we search
And yearn for help
We look for outs before looking for ins
Or why we were chosen to carry this burden
I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can't understand
How it is that we
As victims of this disease
Can't understand our own psychosis
Or our own feelings
I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
I can't understand
How people see suffering
And just walk by
Like if they don't acknowledge something
In this world is wrong then it can't be
I can't stand it
So I sure as hell won't stand for it
Something I really cannot understand
Is how we
As a collective group of soon
To be strong despite feeling weak
Overcome our battle even if we experience defeat
I can't stand it
But I sure I hell can stand for it
Depression is a growing epidemic in our world today and it's an all too real problem. People who don't understand the real battle act like it's a choice we make for attention, but it's not! Who the hell would want to wake up and think "You know what, today I want to be depressed. Today, I want to be suicidal and to hurt myself." No that's not how it works! No one wants to feel that way. Depression can lead to suicide, yes. But there are ways to help before it is too late.
Please visit the link below to find out how you can help save a life.

http://www.helpguide.org/articles/depression/helping-a-depressed-person.htm

And please know that no two depressions are the same, everyone has different methods of coping.
I remember,
The day we first met,
Just like it was yesterday.
We began talking,
Then you said,
"I only like to talk,
To people who are
Somewhat intelligent."

And I don't understand
I don't understand
I don't understand

Because around you,
I can barely put two words together,
Let alone forms words and sentences
That are
"Somewhat intelligent."

So I don't understand
I don't understand
I don't understand

Yet you keep on talking,
You are witty and nice.
You make make me feel happy.
I start to smile and even laugh

But I don't understand
I don't understand
I don't understand

I begin to relax,
I tell a dumb joke,
It wasn't funny but you laugh anyway.
I listen to you talk.
Just keep on talking.
Just keep on talking.

Still I don't understand
I don't understand
I don't understand

But please keep on talking.
I don't understand.
But please keep on talking.
This didn't turn out like I expected.
What you don’t understand
Is that I don’t think like you
I don’t wait in line
Because there is nothing that I need

What you don’t understand
Is that I’m not turned on like you
I’m not a thrill seeker
Because I don’t crave speed

What you don’t understand
Is that I’m not impressed
I don’t have to prove my manhood
Because I already planted that seed

What you don’t understand
Is that I don’t keep up with you
I don’t care anymore
Because I am not full of greed

What you don’t understand
Is that you cannot control me
I made you angry
Because we never agreed

What you don’t understand
Is that I don’t live in your world
I’m not trendy
Because all I do is lead

What you don’t understand
Is that you cannot reach me
I am not vulnerable
Because I will never bleed

What you don't understand
Is why I won’t laugh
I am not fooled
Because you are so full of need

What you don’t understand
Is that it will never work
I will not be compromised
Because your plan will never succeed

What you don’t understand
Is that I seek the truth
I reject what you stipulate
Because I don’t eat what you feed

What you don’t understand
Is that you will never know
I don’t have to explain
Because I have my own creed

What you don’t understand
Is that I will soon be gone
I only warn you
Because I want you to take heed

What you don’t understand
Is that I don’t have to run
I will never follow
Because I will always precede

What you don’t understand
Is that you will never understand
I will prompt questions
Because I will always mislead

What you don’t understand
Is that your time is short
You will soon wilt
Because freedom will **** a *****



All Rights Reserved. Copyright 2011. Mark Lecuona
I wanted to hurt him. Not in the way of cuts and bruises or broken car windows and severed brakes. I wanted to be the only thing on his mind. I wanted for him to write poems about me until his hands cramped and his vision blurred, and then some more. I wanted to infiltrate his dreams. I wanted him to wake up every morning and feel a loss in the pit of his stomach when he opened his eyes and realized I was gone. I wanted to hurt him. I wanted for him to think about me until it drove him to madness. I wanted to course through his veins, like a poison. Slowly rotting him from the inside out. I wanted to hurt him as much as he hurt me. I wanted him to suffer as much as I did. I wanted him to cry until his eyes bled and all he could see was red. I wanted to hurt him. I wanted to be the only thing in existence for him. I wanted to rip him apart, piece by piece, until there was nothing left. I wanted to **** him.
 Jan 30 joel hansen
Dev A
What if I told you I was never wanted?
What would you say?
You'd say "of course I was,
We all love you"

But that's not what I asked.
Being wanted and being loved;
You'd think they'd go hand-in-hand,
But a vast abyss, an eternal ocean separates them.
You can be loved and unwanted
Or wanted but unloved.

What if I told you I never felt wanted?
Maybe I wanted to feel more loved, too;
But that would never happen.

What if I told you the boys never wanted me?
They never wanted to play;
They sent me away.
I was too girly,
Never tough enough,
I played by the rules,
I was too fragile,
Never strong enough;
I was too weak.

What if I told you the girls never wanted me?
They never wanted to play;
They sent me away.
I was too tomboyish,
Never dressed the right way,
I liked sports more than fashion,
I acted more like the boys,
Never wanted to shop or gossip;
I was too tough.

What if I told you the older kids never wanted me?
They never wanted to play;
They sent me away.
I was too childish,
Never mature enough,
I talked to much,
I was too excitable,
Never acting the right way;
I was too young.

What if I told you the adults never wanted me?
They never wanted to play;
They sent me away.
I was too innocent,
Never doing as I was told,
I butted in when I wasn't wanted,
I was too demanding,
Never acted my age;
I was too naive.

What if I told you that you were wrong all along?
You never wanted to play;
You sent me away.
I was too good,
Never breaking the rules,
I tried to do what was expected of me,
I didn't need reprimanding,
Never knowing what was wrong with me;
I was too quiet.

What if I told you I never felt wanted?
Would you still say I was loved?
I wanted more but never knew of what.
I was too different from the rest,
Never acted my age,
I tried to be more;
More mature,
More understanding,
More...
Just more.

What if I told you I never felt wanted?
I tried to fit in,
To be like the others,
The ones I called friends.
But try as I might,
I wasn't invited out,
I found out about the parties days later,
I was the afterthought when everyone else was busy.

How could I feel wanted?
My friends,
My brother,
My cousins,
They never wanted to play;
They sent me away.
Always alone,
Always left behind,
Never feeling wanted.
You asked me why I like you
But I didn’t want to tell
Some of my reasons are cheesy...
But here is why I fell

I love the way your lips curve
When I make you smile
It makes me want to pull you close
And kiss you for awhile

I love the way your eyes twinkle
When you talk about things you love
I truely believe
You are a gift from above

I love that you are compassionate
You have such a big heart
That was the first thing I noticed
Right from the start

I love the way it feels
When you hold me tight
I finally feel safe
Like I could sleep through the night

I love that you don’t judge me
For my less than perfect self
That is more attractive
Than any amount of wealth

There are so many more reasons
But I’ll start with just this few
Maybe someday
I’ll give this poem to you

:)
 Jan 30 joel hansen
Enas
I am so sorry.

For every time I hurt you..

For every cruel word I’ve ever said to you..

For not seeing what you needed most..

For not being kind to you as much as everyone else..

For every tear you have wasted..

For every time I stepped on your heart..

For every time I didn’t believe in you..

For every time I didn’t listen to you.

I am so sorry.

For ripping you apart..

For destroying the beautiful things in you..

For always making you pay the price..

And I apologise for all the wrongdoings I caused you!

Forgive this fallible human that is you.

I am so sorry.
Why Men Cry in the Bathroom

For so many reasons.
I will tell you the why.
I think you know,
Or perhaps, you think you know.

Men are always O.K.,
Even when not.

We expect the worse,
Accept the worse,
Nonetheless,
We are forever unprepared.

Wearily, we cry,
In the bathroom, in private,
Lest sighs slip by,
We be unmasked,
Early warring, strife signs warning.

Copious, tho we weep
Before the mirror confessor,
It is relief untethered,
Unbinding of the feet,
An uncounting
Of beaded rosaries,
Of freshly fallen hail stones,
Of night times terrors
By dawn's early edition's light,
and welcomed.

But look for the mute tear,
The eye-cornered drop,
*** tat, that never drops,
But never ceases formation and
Reforming, over and over again,
In a state of perpetuity of reconstitution,

The tippy tear of an iceberg revealing,
And I see you peeping, wondering,
What is beneath


Look for:
the torn worm-eaten edges of spirit,
thrift shop bought, extra worn,
grieving lines neath the eyes,
where the salt has evaporated,
discolored the skin.
worry lines,
under and above,
browed mapped, furrowed boundaries.
the laugh line saga,
where better days are stored,
recalled, as well as recanted,
publicly, privately.

Why just men?

I don't know,
Perhaps,
it is all I know.


Jan 6, 2013
your effusive and lengthy comments are each a poem in their own right.  

Tinkered with June 22, 2013
With a push from Bala,
A serial peeper, thank God!
Today I’ll ponder,
on these scars.
Tonight I’ll wish,
upon a star.

Tomorrow may bring,
another wound,
but wounds can heal,
if treated soon.

Yesterday,
I thought of death,
and felt the wind,
sigh with his breath.

Not today,
he whispered clear,
perhaps tomorrow,
but do not fear.

In the end,
he comes to all.
The weak, the strong,
the big and small.

He’s timeless and constant,
Death’s always “been”,
and he has no pity,
foe or friend.

He’ll lead me on,
to the unknown,
giving me the thing,
he can never own.

So I will not fear him,
and I shall not fret.
For tomorrow,
has not happened yet.
Death comes to us all.
Next page