Am I in her mind?
Or am I just for her - the blind?

Is she laughing at me?
Or can she agree to laugh as a we?

How much do I mean in her world?
Am I the one who, around her finger can be curled?

The acceptance from her is vital
As the Pope's mighty title

The confirmation of interest is all
Be my guest and don't leave me to crawl

Be my guest to love me and don't let me fall.

I'll turn missing you into a way to spend my life with you.
Just see if I don't.
It doesn't matter what you do to me, I will love you every **** day.
I will make something beautiful and devote it to you.
My pain for your absence will solidify with time, and become a being of its own,
And it will follow me like my own shadow wherever I go
For the rest of my life.
And when I turn out the light,
It will envelope me, surround me, swallow me,
And we will be the same.
I've called you the sun, I've called you light, I've called you the universe,
I've called you my love,
And now you have become something even more heartbreakingly present.
Now you inhabit the dark as well.
Now the thought of you is the air around me,
In my lungs, along my skin,
So absent that it is everywhere.
So empty that it fills everything.
And never in my life will I be able to find a place without it.
Never anywhere will I stop breathing you in.
And as I murmur your name into the dark every night before I fall asleep
I realize that even if you don't care if I die, you will keep me alive.

kissing you was like swerving into oncoming traffic

i can never tell if i am more haunted by empty picture frames or the ashes of their contents

you taught me that the saying "pick your battles" meant not answering when love was at the door

sometimes when i drink whiskey i swear i can hear your voice in the creases of my bedsheets & i sleep on the floor

i still catch myself running my hands over things you touched the most, looking for the echoes of your fingertips

i practice things i'll never say to you

i remember the day you told me you didn't like poetry, how "everything's already been said" & how "nothing meaningful can be captured without being cliche" you know, i don't miss you like the sun and moon, i do not miss you like tide bent waves crashing on the shoreline, i miss you like a chernobyl  swingset misses children

rumor has it that drowning is a lot like coming home, that drinking bleach can **** the butterflies in your stomach

for your love of cigarettes, i would have been an ashtray

this halloween i want to dress up as the you when you loved yourself and show up on your doorstep

i never understood what you meant when you said i was an instrument, back when you would cup your hands around my chest and breathe through the holes in my heart, i still wonder if the sounds i made remind you of wind chimes

i never paid much attention to abandoned buildings until i became one

in my dreams all the flowers smell like your perfume

i am the only person who has ever wished for the same snowflake to fall twice

if i could go back, and rewrite the definition of audacity, it would be how when we lost the bet of love, you said "we never shook on it"

i love you, if the feeling is not mutual, please pretend this was a poem

the only apology i want from you, is to have you repeat the names of children we will never have in your parents living room until they *****

we are the same person if you find yourself up at 4am dry heaving promises, or if you are kept awake by the laughter of those who've abandoned you

nobody ever told you that goodbyes taste like the back of stamps

sometimes i'm convinced that the only reason we hug, is so you can check my back for exit wounds