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Gabby Paige Apr 2014
It's midnight and
I'm awake and
I miss you.

It's been a week since we've touched
and I don't know how much longer I can go on
because I'm addicted to you
and your love.

Oh God, I miss you.
I miss you so much.
I wrote this in the middle of the night.
Gabby Paige Mar 2014
Your warmth slid through my body,
energizing every cell,
a tingling sensation.

You started at my lips and worked your way
down
through my throat
down my spine
past my stomach
around my legs
to my toes.

Part of me wanted to pull away
but I couldn't leave from your
mocha taste and firm grip-
my addiction.

I've never loved a sensation like this,
but I can't bring myself to tear away
from the caffiene that is your touch.
Gabby Paige Mar 2014
I talked to your sister today.
She said she doesn't want you two to get back together either.
He isn't right for you.
She said that when you're with him,
she's lost a sister.
Well,
I've lost something almost as bad,
maybe worse.
I lost a best friend.

Goodbye.
Gabby Paige Mar 2014
You said you'd never hurt me
and for a while,
I was okay.
I wasn't good,
I wasn't bad.
I was alive and that's all I needed.

But now,
I'm hurting.
I realize that sometimes repression
isn't always my best skill because
our memory is the cruelest skill God has given us.
I remember the pain,
the feeling of not enough oxygen,
the tightness in my chest,
the bloodshot eyes.
I remember.

I'm scared he'll do that to me too.
I'm scared to be alone,
but I'm scared to drive him away.
I drove you away.

You said you'd never hurt me.
You never said you wouldn't hurt my mind.
The title of your favorite song
Gabby Paige Mar 2014
I thought that now
I'd be so more more
Alive.
But the ones that were there
When I needed someone the most,
Are slipping...

or maybe its me...

All I know is that I can't do this alone.
Is anybody out there?
Gabby Paige Mar 2014
...
I don't know what I did to make you leave.
I don't know why you would want to.
I thought I was yours-
-your shoulder to cry on
-your secret keeper
-your laughter
-your opposite
-your best friend.

I guess not.
Gabby Paige Mar 2014
You found me in the crowd last Saturday.
I met your eyes and I tried to run-I'm sorry-I really did
but there was no way out.

You gave me a hug
(oh, how I once yearned for your arms around me)
but it felt so tense, so cold.
I didn't want to see you.

You acted like nothing was ever wrong.
Like you hadn't fallen off the face of the Earth.
Like you still loved me,
but you know,
and I know,
it's too late for that now.

I hope you know that I still have your Christmas present.
I bought it when things were still good.
It's too late to give it to you now.

That night,
I was holding a rose from another lover.  
I hope you saw that.

I hope you know that he's better than you'll ever be.
He doesn't touch me like you did,
but he listens to me.
He treats me as an equal, not as an object.
You've grown up too much without aquiring respect and knowledge.
I know it's too late for you to learn the lessons he did.
I guess it's time for you to learn.
A bit of a stream of consciousness.
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