Nestled in bed is the family of mine.
The mice are alive in the walls,
Scritch, scratch, scritch.
This is my time to rise.

Manic are the dreams
That course through my mind.

Ghosts of the past, be free tonight!
Keystrokes fire in rapid succession.
Release these demons,
So that I may rest.

The sun is rising,
I am falling,
Fast, fast, asleep.

1/17/2016

Abandoned playthings rot in isolation,
You toyed with me and left me for broke.
I’d **** you if I could, but you have disarmed me.
Naked and exposed, you dirtied me with your deviant desires.
Back and forth, I thought we swung higher, until the cherry bump threw me from your chains of love.
Up and down on the teeter totter, faster and harder, my legs broke for you.
I sat in the middle of your merry-go-round, but you spun so fast I could not keep hold of you and landed on splintered wood chips.
Bleeding and scarred, I limped from your playground unwillingly.
Why weren’t you labeled condemned?

12/27/2015

The lake was crystal blue,
I watched you toddle away.
Freshly pressed burgers laid across the grill,
I sat and watched my family.
A lover's playlist on my iPod,
A nylon stadium chair supports me.
Yes, this is how life is supposed to be.
Mommies and daddies and babies blankets.
It was all a pipe dream.

You held our hands, both so tightly.
Pulling me out and your father in.
Standing in the door frame, crying.
The door has to close, my sweet.

Tiny hands splayed across the window pane,
Watching her memories fade into a rusted red Jeep.
Black tires squealing and pebbles flinging,
He goes, he goes.
The door is closed, my sweet.

Standing in the doorway,
Years go by in a flash.
A little girl stands waiting,
For her red jeep to come back.

1/16/2016

I am powerless
Over your sweet fixation.
One last time, promise.

1/14/2016

Anonymous camaraderie,
New friends pour from cyberspace.
Tweets flutter rampantly,
In this most ambiguous place.
Strangers in passing,
Or is it kismet?
Can’t you tell what I am saying?
Innuendo among keystrokes.
And you thought I was playing.
LOL

My world is all digital,
Evocatively simple,
Demanding your principle,
Ingrained as symbol,
A**ll in code.

1/6/2016

Microfleece nighties and cottony socks,
Squeezable soft like a carnival teddy bear.
Rituals of the night we perform,
Brush, brush, your silken hair.
Brush, brush, your milky teeth.
Kiss, kiss, your tender cheeks,
Hug, hug, you tiny squeeze.
Breathe in the intoxicating scent of your sleepy innocence,
Shampoo and skin, breathe in, breathe in.
Lights out, door ajar.
Sweet dreams, my angel.

1/17/2016

Stroke me until I purr.
The heady wine has killed my inhibition.
Wrap my legs around your steel,
And ride freely down the strip.
I feel your power vibrate through my being.
Two wheels, two brakes and multiple gears.
Pop the clutch and feel me rise up off the ground.
Pop a wheelie and then crash back into you.
Steadily cruise through the valley of lust,
The rumble of our pleasures roaring through the night air.
Black marks on the pavement are all that remain.
We were here once, before the rain rolled in.

12/27/2015

Captivate

My jealousy is understated,
Desires that have not been sated,
I will captivate you.

Place your gaze upon my lips,
Rhythmic motion of my hips,
I will captivate you.

Fiery embers behind my eyes,
Passion is the bond that ties,
I have captivated you.

You will think that you have won,
But in the morning I’ll be gone,
My memory is in your arms,
I did not mean to cause you harm,
But you captivated me.

My jealousy was overstated,
Behold the mess I have created,
Now I don’t captivate you.

12/26/2016

Words are my release.
Penning poems for recovery.
I write, for I am.

Oh, sweet Indigo
Your empathy astounds
At high frequency.

1/14/2016

broken, you left me
tangled in your web of lies
my ignorance bliss

1/6/2016

Liquid refreshment,
Steaming hot pools of caffeine.
God how I love you.

1/6/2016

Hidden in the crowd.
Looking my way, quiet stalk.
Dare I leave alone?

1/6/2016

Misfire of the brain,
Succumbing to endless pain,
Crushed pills in my hand.

1/6/2016

Eternal mysteries constantly evading,
Never ceasing to puzzle the wisest man.
In all my thoughts and dreams revealing,
God only knows how much I’ve tried to understand.
Mysterious magic speaks of emotion and feeling,
And loneliness has vanished by the touch of a hand.

Obsessed with a passion for the first gentle touch,
Feelings of joy I have wanted so much.

Living alone for the longest of years,
In despair of all hopes for passion.
Following the trail blazed by deep seeded fears,
Elation was a dying breed, going out of fashion.

Allusive answers I never will find,
Nothing so harsh as reality.
Death, love and life are three of a kind.

Looking for a cure of incurable disease,
Of endless hours and wasted misery.
Vows of devotion have me on my knees,
E**ven happiness is all unspoken mystery.

1/20/1999

Organized chaos,
Randomly designed order,
Universal law.

1/17/2016

Naughty little book,
Full of fetish and desire.
Bad boy, read me fast.

1/13/2016

Where my hope resides.
A little mustard seed found.
On my knees, I pray.

1/6/2016

The earth stood still on the day you came into the world.
Adorned in a strawberry crown of silken strands, you delighted all who gazed upon you.
My heart swelled with joy and pride.
You grew, and my heart compressed under your rising weight.
Your footsteps, pitter patter.
My heart, splitter splatter.
Trodden and worn, my heart beats slowly.
All grown up, you dance across my heart with high heeled soles.
Punctured and broken, I cry.
Baby, slow down.
You're killing me.

1/3/2016

Gaseous pockets of fire
Across the midnight void.
Lunar orbs in elliptical motion
Attract the mother planet
Closer to the sun.
Titanium white sparks form as
Iridescent rocket refuse
Collides within fields of
Atmospheric strongholds,
L**ighting up the sky.

1/17/2016

I am the ***** in your colony,
You loved me so completely.
Daily devotions in a bathroom stall,
Always answering to the call,
The presence of God was within your heart,
Your conviction tore me apart.
I repent my sin
But you still won’t let me in,
And cast me out
While you remain devout.
Good Christians, ha!

1/8/2016

Little poem I wrote.
Dramatic dance of words,
I love you, Haiku.

1/6/2016

Oh, sweet child of the light,
Your wisdom shines on through
The hum of a million Ohms,
Coursing through your fibers
Bouncing through the universe like
Shooting stars, they collide.

Power and beauty you behold,
Beams of light surround you
No constraints on your will
But will they medicate you into submission?
Or shall you meditate for awhile?

What is your mission?
Oh, sweet child of the light,
You’ve been here before
I can see forever in your eyes.

1/14/2016

Wide awake, can’t sleep.
Restless turning among sheets.
Sun rising again.

1/6/2016

A blustery wind blows through skeletal trees,
A bluish-gray hue cast upon the land.
The cold wind chills my aching heart,
The landscape a mirrored image of my soul.
Barren.  Blue.
Lonely am I without you,
The heat of your embrace,
The warmth of your kiss.
The years pass as the feeling burns,
A futile attempt to melt my heart.

1/12/2016

From a tiny seed,
Cultivated on the vine.
You fed hedonistic need,
Turning grapes into wine.

Sun-ripened botanicals,
Coated with white snow,
Reactive chemicals,
Delicious moscato.

Metabolic complexity,
Antioxidant neveau,
Oxygenic activity,
Bubbly pinot grigio.

Crisp and refreshing,
Cheeks become sanguine.
Acidic and effervescing,
Behold, fruit into wine

1/17/2016

Drive over me with studded tires,
Drain my tank until I sputter and die.
Your salt eats at my chassis,
Creating large jagged holes in my coat of steel.
You spin out gravel toward my windshield.
Crack! You’ve dinged me yet again.
When will I ever learn?
Probably never.
My brake lines are dripping,
I absolutely cannot stop this madness.
You drove me hard and put me up wet.
My headlights used to beam,
Now I am a one-lighted wonder,
Thanks to you, northern punk junk.
Watch this tail-light high-tail it on out of here.

1/6/2016

Throw open my closet doors and don my best business attire,
I am fueled by coffee and motivation to succeed.
The youngest of my colleagues, I have excelled in the pursuit of the american dreams.
I am supermom.
I am superwoman.
Hear me roar.

The fall came on without warning.
This mental prison confined me and I could not escape.
Spiraling down, down, down until…
CRASH.
I am no more.

The alarm blares and I hit snooze for the umpteenth time.
I roll out of bed, slither into day old sweats and smooth my hair with a greasy hand.
Did I feed my child today?
Who cares anyway?
I am the middle-aged teenager, tromping around town in pajamas.
Bad decisions, yeah, I’ve made a few.
But who are you to judge anyway?

1/6/2016

Of all the men I’ve ever loved,
I don’t know who I miss the most.
Or if I even loved them at all.
Am I capable of that?
A New Year’s Twist, a resolution missed.
I find myself in another lover’s arms,
Complete without bliss.
Sacred trusts and cheap grocery wine.
Empty bottles and people, but one hell of a time.
Sugar, you don’t know how stand up you are.
Famous last words from a gentleman afar.
How could you love this hot mess I’ve become?
Because you hang the moon, love.

1/1/2016

Xanax and textiles soothe your savage beast.
Roam through the aisles and lose yourself.
Blissed out ignorance while money is spent.
Oh look, a sale! Screams the internal bi-polar.
Retail is your therapy and I am your psychiatrist.
Folding your ***** laundry into color coded displays.
Prozac on clearance, aisle 13.
Cover your sorrows in piles and dreams.

1/4/2016

How do you take your coffee?
You’d surprise me with a cup.
We parsed out tidbits,
Sale mongers on a mission.
A true couple of misfits,
But you imparted to me your wisdom.
We swapped photos of our pride and joy,
Then the day came and you said,
This just isn’t fun anymore.
You were right.
So I clocked out.

1/7/2016

Silliness personified,
Amber eyes, ginger locks.
Vivacious and free-spirited
As she radiates
Never-ending energy.
Nocturnal wanderings in the twilight
As she reaches for the shooting stars,
H**olding her dreams so near.

1/17/2016

Bulging at the seams,
These are my life dreams.
Knick knacks and toys,
Relics of girls and of boys.
Emotions and things
Happiness does not bring.
But if I throw them away,
How will I occupy my day?
Dusting, organizing, putting up stuff.
Close to the brink of having more than enough.
Throw it away!
Purge myself of these beasts!
Have I accomplished my goal?
Not in the least.

12/27/2015

Shackled by whims and desires.
The selfless and the selfish, Danse Macabre.
Who holds the key to these manacles?
Is it me?
Or is it you?
You are the spider and I dance through your tangled web of desire.
But your desires cannot be sated by my sacrificial offerings.
Do you desire at all, my dear?
You skitter through the woven webs, devouring the innocents trapped in silken tombs.
I beg of you master, please, show your mercy to your subservient.
Release me so I may release you.
******* is not becoming of you.

1/1/2016

Close your eyes, and you will find me there.
Long tendrils of fiery hair billow around me as I come to you.
Shimmery porcelain skin beckons you, please touch me.
I rise amongst the ethereal mist, and shower you in soft petal kisses.
Your manhood calls to me, and I respond.
My velvet hands reach for every inch of your skin.
My plump rosy lips tantalize your essence.
I am not your concubine, but you don’t know that yet.
You belong to me, but you don’t realize that yet.
All that you are will be devoured by my ***** mounds and valleys.
The winds howl as the demons moan in ecstasy.
Demons? And I thought it was just me.
Hello, Incubus.  Fancy meeting you here.

12/29/2015

Your eyes were sweating,
Or at least that is what you said.
Those aqua pools, glinting with moisture
The sight of you broke my resolve,
My eyes started to sweat with you.

Oh you were a prayer answered,
The gentlest of men in the deep south.
We were kindred spirits that hung the moon.

Oh how it must have hurt you,
To pack up my things and watch me go.
And what do you do with the things that remain?
My daughter's furniture in your home?
Do you sleep in my bed and dream of me still?
Drink from my wine glasses and imagine I am still with you?
Buddy, I miss you.

Your blue eyes glittered when they met mine.
We danced and laughed like children reborn,
While you sliced and diced a culinary gourmet feast.
You were able to reach me when no one else could.
Our first date, I won you over, merely with these little words,
I am just trying to get to know you buddy.
Our feet and legs entwined, you held me so tightly.
I tried to roll over, you woke up and said come back to me,
Then you fell into a deep sleep again.
We walked in each others footsteps in identical sandals.
Now that is all I have left of you, is your soles on my feet.
I miss you love.

I came to you innocent and sweet,
You broke me with your crooked smile.
What was behind those pearly whites?
A serpents tongue.

Lash me, oh master.
Beat me, betray me.

Two bottles of wine.
You won't even notice I have faded away.
Onlookers mourn the co-dependent ***** I have become.

The sunshine reflected off your dampened silverish spikes,
Wrap-around glasses hid your cool baby blues,
But I knew they were there.
Your nimble fingers gracefully grasped the frisbee
As we danced in the parking lot after a late day swim.
It was a glorious day, you and I together in the aquamarine blue,
Barely clothed, as close to naked flesh on flesh as we could get in public.
Your eyes ever so gentlemanly kept a gaze upon mine,
But I know you must have noticed my ample ***** a mere inches below,
Black spandex bikini top and glistening with clear droplets.
You never let it show though.
Baby, I am your Sweet Pea.

1/10/2016