Pain is the only healer I can befriend
Her unconventionality is my only sin
The bait and bleed
Then relief

Graveyard shift ,
I don't even see the sunrise
It's  still dark outside
Before I sleep;
I know I will wake when
Its sunset.
Am I even human anymore?
I don't remember the last time
I saw the sunrise.
My body's  cold but I don't shudder,
I barely sleep , I hear no beat from my chest.
But I'm very much alive.
Or is this just feelings of a cold winter...

you undress my heart
so delicately
untill I drown
breathlessly
in your embrace


love me as you wish

I look outside
The sun laughs at me

I look up the sky
It's clear with an ocean blue

I look at the trees
The wind dances around with the leaves

I stay inside
And long for the outside

dead in the night
all alone
dead inside

eyes wide open
glued to the ceiling
gone all mental healing

all the overthinking
praying for redemption
followed by slow blinking
for shame, i'm left with feelings of abnegation.

there are roses growing
from my hands
My doubt the seeds
Begging them to grow

There are roses climbing
up my arms
digging in my skin
but i am numb
to their thorns and beauty

There are roses growing
in my lungs
bloodied petals
filling my throat
and falling from my lips

Tears are sliding
down my cheeks
I've had enough
I am to weak