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Haueru Jan 9
I admit I never had real love for you
I admit I did truly care for you
I admit I was ever so tolerant
I admit despite you narcissistic nature
I still never hated you.
I admit despite your using nature and definitions of what "love" and a "real man" is
I stayed there for you even from a distance.
I admit I see why you are alone and never found real love, sorry *** doesn't make love true no matter how good it was.
I admit I never dated anyone as pathetic as you.
I admit falling for you ,I now grew pathetic Too.
I admit  I want to learn you and you learn to me and I don't maybe we both can grow.
Can you just admit it's your fault just once.
Haueru Dec 2019
You want perfection
While I hold your baggage
But can you hold mine
For just a second
Oh wait you can't
I see
Also do you want to
Remain blameless while
I hold all the stakes
Well that's fine too
Let me spoil you
Even with you
Sitting on my back
That's that true real love
I doubt there
Ever be a tipping point
As I carefully hold it in
With no spaces
To vent
As I smile
Haueru Dec 2019
I think
Therefore I am
I want to be greatest
Of all time
Actually I'd settle for
Being the greatest me
I can possibly be
So I guess no regrets
Pretty much impossible
To regress
God I only pray
For success
Morning mantra
Haueru Dec 2019
I'm fighting it for sure
Can I stand up
Please rise up
I'm not ready for this ride
Like my daddy
Told me I'm only  human
We all got them
But difference is
Can you be the one to face them
And I'm like ****...
Haueru Dec 2019
Graveyard shift ,
I don't even see the sunrise
It's  still dark outside
Before I sleep;
I know I will wake when
Its sunset.
Am I even human anymore?
I don't remember the last time
I saw the sunrise.
My body's  cold but I don't shudder,
I barely sleep , I hear no beat from my chest.
But I'm very much alive.
Or is this just feelings of a cold winter...
Haueru Dec 2019
Have you ever dated a butterfly ?
A butterfly who wings been  grounded by lies,sin, adultery and broken promises.

A grounded butterfly whose wings ripped apart from a monstrous ant.

The butterfly stayed realizing its wings will never grow but it loved that ant for pleasures  that won't fill the soul but just entice the body.

One day  that butterfly did try to fly again but no wings and it found itself by mere coincidence in the nest of  a growing dragonfly.

The dragon fly too was hurt and found itself wingless doing anything to forget it couldn't fly.

One day the butterfly and dragonfly came to be one together to ease the pain and to give the love the other deserves both too soon not ready but it's great, good and **** right horrible days.

But over time through mistakes and lies.
The dragonfly past vices caught up to it and little did the butterfly know it had baggage too it was fighting though wrong it tried to hide it but made things worse.

More time passed and struggles and misfortunes continued; it  became apparent to the butterfly tired of being grounded it saw the dragonfly as species it cant intermix with.

They fought mentally against eachother only while hurting deep inside, the dragonfly too became more devoided and hidden but secretly it wanted to help bring the wings back to the butterfly.  But after being dishonest the butterfly came to see it as a no good liar and cheat too.

A simple mistake it made and it hangs over something it never did but the die was cast, a created persona made from pain and hurt.
Truth is till this day that dragonfly only wishes to help and love that butterfly  like it should be and dispel that hurt.

It wonders how can you get a butterfly that gave you chances and now won't take you back ?can you make a home, write a poem, or stay home alone wondering can you turn back time.....

It's still got a ways to go before its fully mature and experienced but it wishes to grow along side the butterfly as it too grows it's wings.

Can one day they build into what eachother needs with reckless abandon and learn to love one another the right way.

Just mere thoughts from a dragonfly.
Late night
Haueru Jul 2019
People fiddle with fire
And get mad when they sweat
Dose their bodies in oil
And play in the flame
Hell fire
But cries it burns
The fickle logic
I tell myself
I want to help
But can you help
Those who don't seek
Questions abound
Do I deserve
A fiery baptism
To build your
Throne on this pile of dirt
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