I want to speak French, and read more, and wear suits more often but in a casual way, and also wear a watch, and design book covers as a side job, while working for and helping children who don’t have great homes.
I want to be a morally better person, and live life to its fullest potential, and stay in shape because I want to live long, and not because I want to look good. I want to be able to have a great time and remember it, I want to remember to take my meds every day for so long that it becomes part of me and I am finally better, I want to be in a triathlon.
I want to create art that makes you feel so alone that you don’t care what happens next, but make music that makes you want to live forever because there will never be enough time to experience everything you want to feel. I want to share moments with strangers that make us life long friends. I want to feel things I’ve never even thought were possible, and fall in love with people that I didn’t even think exist.

She's so different from who I used to love, every time I see her or talk to her it's like this ghost or something haunting me. It looks, talks, and smells like her. And it should be her. But as much as I want it to be, it never is.

I knew.
I knew it from the second she opened her door, her boots in my hand, not even knowing who she was.
I knew I was in love. I knew she was in love.
Both scared to admit it, but we were.
I knew we wouldn't last.
She would have to be the one to end it.
She was going to have to break my heart.
And it couldn't be a clean break.
No, no that wouldn't work.
My love was too strong.
I was prepared to put up a fight.
I knew she was going to have to smash it, burn it, then forget it in the rain.
And even then, I'd still want her.
I knew I would.
There was nothing she could do to make the pain stronger than the love.
I knew there was no end.
Right when she opened the door.
I knew.

I was purchased, used, and thrown out.
I got to see a few good times. Usually blurry or something got in the way, but it was still sort of ok.

The cycle starts over.

I'm purchased, used, and thrown out.
Once again I see wonderful things,
but usually posed and fake.
It was still sort of ok.

Until the cycle starts over.