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Hold onto me
When memory
Is pulling on my wings;
Your arms around,
When I break down,
They heal what sadness stings.

Protect me here
And hold me near
When fear reaches to claw me;
You hold my hand
When I can't stand
And in my panic calm me.

When worries come
And flutter from
Anxiety's dark cave:
You fight them back,
Stop their attack
And keep me strong and brave.
depression, panic attacks, and anxiety.
The heart that beats within me now
Was silent for a while:
Shouldering the guilt of years
And clothed in my denial.

And when, those blurry months ago,
It stirred to life again,
I tried to still my beating heart
The way it was back then.

I should have known, I should have seen
Through my soul's sad disguise;
But ev'ry time I saw the truth
I quickly closed my eyes.

The heartbeat in my shackled chest
Was loud, but I was louder.
Sticking fingers in my ears,
I hummed to quell the doubter.

"Your heart's alive! It beats again!
The fears you loved have faded."
But I felt safe behind the bars
My jailed heart had created.

So, silently, this gentle Trust
That I had never known
Came whisp'ring through to save my heart
Of flesh, and not of stone.

Trust wrapped its arms around me
And lifted up my soul
From depths of blue obscurity
And I gave up control.

I opened up my eyes that day
And though they shone with tears,
The hurting heart inside of me
Felt stronger than those fears.
1-2 Sept 9, 2016 and 3-8 Feb 4, 2017
My feet haven't moved
And my breath is caught somewhere
But my mind's racing.
Again, I find myself at home
The home I made last year
And while it hasn't changed too much,
That I have is my fear.

I loved this place and made it mine,
And tied myself to it;
But now that I've returned, I'm lost
And not like the rest, I admit.

Will I find my place? Or will that only come
With friends who are my home?
Am I isolated now, and is this why
My home feels so alone?

Perhaps this feeling soon will pass
And maybe it'll get better;
But for the moment, I'm alone,
And can't seem to find my tether.
It's like I never left.
Out the window there,
Beneath the glassy, blue sky,
The white sun bleaches
Everything beneath its rays.
I wither inside.
I die if I venture out.
And yet, my heart yearns,
My soul burns, to see the world.
Mountains, rivers, seas;
Indeed, just to see a tree
I would leave it all.
I would risk the burning sun,
Drop it all and run,
If forests were there for me.
I would endure it,
Knowing that cool springs waited.
My heart climbs mountains
As I answer phone calls here;
My mind explores caves
As I file cash receipts.
I watch mountain lakes
Turn gold with the dying sun
As I read emails.
But some day, I will reach out
And instead of desk,
I will grab my mountain gear;
Some day, my fingers
Will callous and toughen up:
Instead of keyboard,
I'll skip rocks across a creek.
I will do it all,
See all I've wanted to see,
And feel the cool breeze
After climbing the mountains
And fording rivers.
I'll get out of this desk chair
And go explore what's out there.
  Aug 2016 Mrs Ashley Somebody
Torias
Dad,
You don't get me,
You never have.
When I ran away,
Were you even sad?
Dad,
You wanted me gold,
I tarnished in your hands.
I fell through your fingers
Like grains of sand.
Dad,
You don't get me.
Especially not when
I told you to call me
Kylo Ren.
5/14/16 Felt inspired XD Should I mention the rights to this character belong to Disney or something?
Mountains or valleys
Quick heartbeats or slow exhales
Who are you to me?
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