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Shannon Jun 2018
You told me you loved me,
You lied to my face.
You stole my heart,
And put it in a case.

You locked it away,
So far away.
You own it, you stole it,
It can't run away.

You told me you loved me,,
You lied to my face.
You closed my mouth,
Just incase.

You told me not to tell anyone,
You made me promise.
You made me quiet,
I still broke that promise.

You told me you loved me,
You lied to my face.
You stole my mind,
and entrapped it away.

You bruised me,
You hurt me.
This isn't the way.
Why did you have to
Do it anyway?

You told me you loved me,
You lied to them.
You put on a smile,
And a façade.
They believed you,
And threw my words away.

You told me you loved me,
You still lied to the rest.
I knew you were lying,
This wasn't what was best.

You lied, you pried,
You said you wouldn't do it again.
I cried, and cried,
You still inflicted the pain.

You told me you loved me,
You lied to yourself.
You said you were sorry,
But that couldn't help.

Stop, oh stop,
You did it, nonstop.
You hit, you bit,
I just wasn't enough.

You told me you loved me,
You lied, oh you ******* lied!
You could never love,
With your demons inside.
Jun 2018 · 523
i want to wake up
Shannon Jun 2018
one day i want to wake up,

beside you.

i want to feel your breath on my skin,

your lips lingering over my cheeks,

and your hands caressing me,

with a grasp unlike others,

and what would feel like home.

a grasp so careful, and protective,

like nobody would know.

i want to wake up beside you,

and have you love me,

all of me, for who i am.

i want to wake up beside you,

and not have you leave,

while we're making a language

that nobody can understand.

i want to wake up beside you,

while you feed me with affection,

honey sweet mutterings in my ear,

whispering things you want me to hear.

i want to wake up beside you,

i want to feel a sanctuary, a peace.

for you are my home,

let me have that please.
Jun 2018 · 764
it still wasn't enough
Shannon Jun 2018
she held the weapon in her hand,

cut open her chest,

and handed him herself.

her heart was torn, willingly,

pulsating in his hand.

he was her life,

he was her reason,

and she handed him hers infront of him.

she was devoted,

she was gold,

she couldn't love another,

only the one who held her heart in their hands.

she asked him to cradle it,

she asked him to care for it,

she asked him to love it, and nurture it.

and so he did,

he hugged it,

and he fed it,

with adoration and love,

but the next thing she knew,

he had played too hard.

he had crushed it,

and bruised it,

battered alive,

she was blind,

she did not realise he had used it,

and lied.

and so he walked away,

after feeling uninterested,

he took her heart with her,

and left her to bleed,

she cried,

she tried,

but it still wasn't enough.

she knew that someday she'd see him,

and it would be tough.
Jun 2018 · 3.7k
the awakened fire
Shannon Jun 2018
its a vehement compassion,

the kind where you miss it,

you crave it,

you want it,

you need it.

a fire that awakens a fervid beast inside of you,

that weakens at the sight of you bare.

your hands holding mine,

caressing,

lingering.

your lips against mine,

tender,

and fore bearing.

but your heart is elsewhere,

your mind is elsewhere.

your heart is stirring my insides,

touching me,

loving me,

devouring me.

your mind is thinking about where you want me,

where you need me,

where all of me is open to you.

to take.

and we are bound,

though not bound by love,

that same night;

you broke me.
Jun 2018 · 1.9k
Is it really love?
Shannon Jun 2018
It's a vehement compassion,

The kind where you miss it,

You crave it.

You want it.

You need it,

A fire that awakens a fervid beast inside of you,

That weakens at the sight of you bare.

Your hands holding mine,

Caressing,

Lingering.

Your lips against mine,

Tender,

And fore bearing.

But your heart is elsewhere,

Your mind is elsewhere.

Your heart is stirring my insides,

Touching me,

Loving me,

Devouring me.

Your mind is thinking about where you want me,

Where you need me,

Where all of me is open to you.

To take.

And we are bound,

Though not bound by love,

That same night;

You broke me.
May 2018 · 335
headache
Shannon May 2018
How constant you are,

from the surface of my skin, to the depth within.

Oh this pounding in my head,

the cephalalgy makes me want to drop dead.

Please just let me rest peacefully in my bed,

Though the sobriety I wish to endure won’t come.

Pills after pills,

And more pills still,

It won’t crush this rising affliction,

It’s most certainly not an addiction.

You prevent me from my task,

You crush all concentration in my path,

You’re a constant discomfort,

An ache in my brain,

I might just be going insane.

—-
May 2018 · 471
I often painted
Shannon May 2018
I often painted,

I enjoyed the subtle hues in which such miracles were created.

I found the colors to paint,

And wanted to paint her like the stars in the night

and the moon that shone so bright.

I wanted to paint her like the sun shining on her skin,

and the heat that radiates from it.

I often painted
May 2018 · 310
adoration
Shannon May 2018
From the moment I saw her, I knew she was worth my broken heart.

Whether it was she who broke it repeatedly or not.

I wanted her to show me the most damaged parts,

her soul,

and I wanted to show her how it still shone like gold.

it still dared to leave a mark

every word,

every thought,

Every moment we had

every half smile,

and every sigh,

every almost conversation,

I do not know why.

but it still left its mark,

It left traces only she could put

inside of my heart.
May 2018 · 2.0k
a lechery
Shannon May 2018
It's only you that i want,

that I need,

that I could have,

But also you weren't mine to keep.

I wanted to be held by you,

feel your hands on me,

Your lips on my skin,

I wanted you to feel what I had felt for you.

And I had a deeply hidden

And inarticulate desire for something beyond,

It's an inclination, disposition.

an impulse, a craving, a yearning.

This wasn't as ruining,

But yet it has taken every part of me to not think of.

A libido for you, a sensuality,

Lust to take all that I had to give,

And I'd given it—
May 2018 · 277
things that kill love
Shannon May 2018
What kills love?

Only this, neglect.

Not to see when you stand before me,

Not to think of you in simplicity,

Yet so diverse and explicitly complex.

to choose you out of habit,

And not desire.

to say your name without hearing it,

And to assume you are mine,

When I can never be yours.

My next sin,

Derelicting ourselves,

Neglect and disregard.

What feels like a stab to the heart,

And the crack of a skull,

One of the most heartbreaking to all--
May 2018 · 226
anger
Shannon May 2018
Everyone witnesses your destruction,

When you're tearing yourself apart

and constantly trying to heal

those wounds you’ve wrecked in half.  

You're intimidating and brooding,

And people see the smoldering flames

with the raging winds.

My sin was indignation, a wrath,

Fury and exasperation.

Anger does harm,

And if you hold it in your heart

It will eat at your walls,

And spill out the guts of the lives of people you love.

It will destroy you, and

I have already destroyed myself too—
May 2018 · 456
jealousy
Shannon May 2018
Jealously is the tie that binds,

And binds,

And binds

It was the way you spoke about,

What you couldn't have,

Yet what you wanted so bad.

With animosity,

Regret,

Disdain,

And underneath it all, just a hint of pride.

And it's truth that,

The bullets of jealousy **** the shooter too.

Verily, It destroys good deeds, as fire would destroy,

Incinerate,

And ravish

anything,

As flames eradicate feelings,

In which jealousy is pain,

Obsession,

And envy,

In which we all blame the feelings of jealousy,

For the things we can't  ever really have.
May 2018 · 223
the mind
Shannon May 2018
The mind is more awake, and trembling than anything else,

leaving one to be anything but restful.

It brings deep nights of consciousness,

while precious minutes pass by too swiftly.

The mind is a void, although silence speaks utterly loudly.

It screams.

It hollers in a room that only echoes so far.

It's an enclosure, an aviary in which you are the feathered friend,

keeping the bars company.

It's an inferno, in which erupts chaotically,

demolishing all good in it's path.

It's a vessel, awaiting a titanic tragedy,

to be dismantled, and submerged into it's own nemesis it willingly walks upon.

It screams, and it burns, and it drowns all in its trail.

Leaving no trace but the agonising silence,

all sound devoured by a faultless beast.

This

is

how

I

feel.

— The End —