Velveteen butterflies sail into strawberry way , strike a pose against the meditative , sunny disposition of the coming May
Harlequin horseflies and Bumblebee jesters
Pear bloom ballet , Mayfly soloist , interpretive Ferns are quite dashing in the Alabama breeze , Wood Thrush dancers and Mourning Dove romantics cooing in the Honey Locust trees
Madame April's storybook of Springtide scenes
and fairytale dreams ...

A light beat in the back
Enough to let it all flow
But, heart, is the solo.

These are poems about sinking, poems about drowning, poems about loss, and poems about new discoveries we sometimes make while feeling lost...



Sinking
by Michael R. Burch

for Virginia Woolf

Weigh me down with stones…
fill all the pockets of my gown…
I’m going down,
mad as the world
that can’t recover,
to where even mermaids drown.



What Goes Around, Comes
by Michael R. Burch

This is a poem about loss
so why do you toss your dark hair—
unaccountably glowing?

How can you be sure of my heart
when it’s beyond my own knowing?

Or is it love’s pheromones you trust,
my eyes magnetized by your bust
and the mysterious alchemies of lust?

Now I am truly lost!



Sonnet 26
by Giacomo da Lentini
loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

I've seen it rain on sunny days;
I’ve seen the darkness split by light;
I’ve seen white lightning fade to haze;
Seen frozen snow turn water-bright.

Some sweets have bitter aftertastes
While bitter things can taste quite sweet:
So enemies become best mates
While former friends no longer meet.

Yet the strangest thing I've seen is Love,
Who healed my wounds by wounding me.
Love quenched the fire he lit before;
The life he gave was death, therefore.

How to warm my heart? It eluded me.
Yet extinguished, Love sears all the more.

Giacomo da Lentini, also known as Jacopo da Lentini or by the appellative Il Notaro (“The Notary”), was an Italian poet of the 13th century who has been credited with creating the sonnet.



The Discovery
by Michael R. Burch

for Beth

What use were my arms, before they held you?
What did my lips know of love, before they encountered yours?
I learned I was made for your heart, so true,
to overwhelm with its tender force.



Grave Oversight I
by Michael R. Burch

The dead are always with us,
and yet they are naught!

Grave Oversight II
by Michael R. Burch

for Jim Dunlap, who winked and suggested “not”

The dead are either naught
or naughty, being so sought!



Door Mouse
by Michael R. Burch

I’m sure it’s not good for my heart—
the way it will jump-start
when the mouse scoots the floor
(I try to **** it with the door,
never fast enough, or
fling a haphazard shoe...
always too slow too)
in the strangest zig-zaggedy fashion
absurdly inconvenient for mashin’,
till our hearts, each maniacally revvin’,
make us both early candidates for heaven.



Birthday Poem to Myself
by Michael R. Burch

LORD, be no longer this Distant Presence,
Star-Afar, Righteous-Anonymous,
but come! Come live among us;
come dwell again,
happy child among men—
men rejoicing to have known you
in the familiar manger’s cool
sweet light scent of unburdened hay.
Teach us again to be light that way,
with a chorus of angelic songs lessoned above.
Be to us again that sweet birth of Love
in the only way men can truly understand.
Do not frown darkening down upon an unrighteous land
planning fierce Retributions we require, and deserve,
but remember the child you were; believe
in the child I was, alike to you in innocence
a little while, all sweetness, and helpless without pretense.
Let us be little children again, magical in your sight.
Grant me this boon! Is it not my birthright—
just to know you, as you truly were, and are?
Come, be my friend. Help me understand and regain Hope’s long-departed star!



You Never Listened
by Michael R. Burch

You never listened,
though each night the rain
wove its patterns again
and trembled and glistened...

You were not watching,
though each night the stars
shone, brightening the tears
in her eyes palely fetching...

You paid love no notice,
though she lay in my arms
as the stars rose in swarms
like a legion of poets,

as the lightning recited
its opus before us,
and the hills boomed the chorus,
all strangely delighted...



Time Out
by Michael R. Burch

Time is running out,
no doubt.
Time is running out.

I don’t know what the LORD’s about,
since Time is running out, the Lout!,
and leaving me with gas and gout.

I don’t know what the LORD’s about;
still, it does no good to grouse or pout,
since Time is merely running out,
like quail before a native scout.

’Twill do no good to shout or flout:
Time’s running out,
I have no doubt,
though who knows what the LORD’s about?

No need for faith or even doubt,
since Time is merely running out,
like water from a rusty spout
or mucous from a leaky snout.

Yes, Time is merely running out,
and yet I feel inclined to pout
and truth be told, sometimes to doubt
just what the hell the LORD’s about.



Pointed Art
by Michael R. Burch

The point of art is that
there is no point.
(A grinning, quick-dissolving cat
from Cheshire
must have told you that.)

The point of art is this—
the hiss
of Cupid’s bright bolt, should it miss,
is bliss
compared to Truth’s neurotic kiss.



Haiku

Am I really this old,
so many ghosts
beckoning?
—Michael R. Burch

Sleepyheads!
I recite my haiku
to the inattentive lilies.
—Michael R. Burch

Stillness:
the sound of petals
drifting down softly together...
—Miura Chora, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

The sky tries to assume
your eyes’ azure
but can’t quite pull it off.
—Michael R. Burch

The sky tries to assume
your eyes’ arresting blue
but can’t quite pull it off.
—Michael R. Burch

Early robins
get the worms,
cats waiting to pounce.
—Michael R. Burch

Two bullheaded frogs
croaking belligerently:
election season.
—Michael R. Burch

An enterprising cricket
serenades the sunrise:
soloist.
—Michael R. Burch

A single cricket
serenades the sunrise:
solo violinist.
—Michael R. Burch

My life:
how little remains
of a night so brief?
—Masaoka Shiki, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

(Masaoka Shiki struggled with tuberculosis and died at age 35.)

Yesterday’s snows
that fell like cherry blossoms
are mudpuddles again.
—Koshigaya Gozan, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

I write, erase, revise, erase again,
and then...
suddenly a poppy blooms!
—Katsushika Hokusai, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Vanishing spring:
songbirds lament,
fish weep with watery eyes.
—Matsuo Basho, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Wearily,
I enter the inn
to be welcomed by wisteria!
—Matsuo Basho, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Pale moonlight:
the wisteria’s fragrance
seems equally distant.
—Yosa Buson, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

By such pale moonlight
even the wisteria's fragrance
seems distant.
—Yosa Buson, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Pale moonlight:
the wisteria’s fragrance
drifts in from afar.
—Yosa Buson, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Pale moonlight:
the wisteria’s fragrance
drifts in from nowhere.
—Yosa Buson, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Plum flower temple:
voices ascend
from the valleys.
—Natsume Soseki, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

limping to the grave under the sentence of death,
should i praise ur LORD? think i’ll save my breath!
–michael r. burch

The Ultimate Haiku Against God
by Michael R. Burch

Because you made a world
where nothing matters,
our hearts lie in tatters.



Homer translations

Surrender to sleep at last! What a misery, keeping watch all night, wide awake. Soon you’ll succumb to sleep and escape all your troubles. Sleep. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Passage home? Impossible! Surely you have something else in mind, Goddess, urging me to cross the ocean’s endless expanse in a raft. So vast, so full of danger! Hell, sometimes not even the sea-worthiest ships can prevail, aided as they are by Zeus’s mighty breath! I’ll never set foot on a raft, Goddess, until you swear by all that’s holy you’re not plotting some new intrigue! — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Let’s hope the gods are willing. They rule the vaulting skies. They’re stronger than men to plan, execute and realize their ambitions. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Few sons surpass their fathers; most fall short, all too few overachieve. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Death is the Great Leveler, not even the immortal gods can defend the man they love most when the dread day dawns for him to take his place in the dust. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Any moment might be our last. Earth’s magnificence? Magnified because we’re doomed. You will never be lovelier than at this moment. We will never pass this way again. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Beauty! Ah, Terrible Beauty! A deathless Goddess, she startles our eyes! — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Many dread seas and many dark mountain ranges lie between us. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

The lives of mortal men? Like the leaves’ generations. Now the old leaves fall, blown and scattered by the wind. Soon the living timber bursts forth green buds as spring returns. Even so with men: as one generation is born, another expires. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Since I’m attempting to temper my anger, it does not behoove me to rage unrelentingly on. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Overpowering memories subsided to grief. Priam wept freely for Hector, who had died crouching at Achilles’ feet, while Achilles wept himself, first for his father, then for Patroclus, as their mutual sobbing filled the house. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

“Genius is discovered in adversity, not prosperity.” — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Ruin, the eldest daughter of Zeus, blinds us all with her fatal madness. With those delicate feet of hers, never touching the earth, she glides over our heads, trapping us all. First she entangles you, then me, in her lethal net. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Death and Fate await us all. Soon comes a dawn or noon or sunset when someone takes my life in battle, with a well-flung spear or by whipping a deadly arrow from his bow. — Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Death is the Great Leveler, not even the immortal gods can defend the man they love most when the dread day dawns for him to take his place in the dust.—Homer, loose translation/interpretation by Michael R. Burch

Keywords/Tags: Homer translations, Haiku translations, life, death, sinking, drowning, bitter, sweet, rain, darkness, love, fire, fate, ruin, genius, memory, memories

it starts with you
sitting underneath the sun at dusk
the only noise you can focus on
is your languid breathing
while the scent of the hot wind
curls into your nostrils
in wicked streams

your slow and steady breaths
gives the beat for the rest of nature to imitate
her winds join in
offering a sweet and watery whisper
blending her breaths and your breaths in an airy duet
laying down the foundation for
the soft pitter-patter
of her plants and animals

her mischievous wind
knocks against the willow's branches
swinging her leaves.
their hollow ringing
is rhythmic and relentless

and then you hear it
the orchestral arrangement
that mother nature
has arranged for you
you become the conductor
of your movement
with your deliberate, languid winds

and when you take a pause in your rhythmic breaths
to savor the sweet scent of summer
as if it could be stamped on your mind
the kestrel's song plunges
into the orchestra
the shrill, sharp notes form a soloist in a flurry of feathers and beaks
completing the orchestra

as the moon rises, opening her pale eyes
as she sways to the rhythm of Earth's song

When the orchestra begins to play
serene melodies eternally free,
drifting over gifts of hypnotic beauty,
lifting you out from the depths of the sea,

A triumphant entry rises the curtain,
and the fantasy-overture starts its story,
as wondrous morning celebrates passion
striking heart chords with fresh glory,

Waves of the sound wash over thee,
as tempo rubato steals beats of free rhythm,
giving birth to vibrant embellished pearls,
preserving the virtuoso’s flawless gift,  

Violine pleading into the waltz of roses
rhythmic freedom mingling  harmonic trills,
dazzling whirlwinds diffusing tasteful fragrance
carried by fairy tales over hills,

Dreamy melodies slip under the gateway,
hummers striking piano strings
broken chords accompanied by murky
nocturnal interlude, where words cannot fit,

Unnoticed by the virtuoso’s glistening tears
witnessing in silence mesmerizing
sounds that would never be held
in-time at the discretion of the soloist,

Lost halfway in the ebullient coda,
and musing under the canopy of the stars,
glittering gold blazing display of bravata,
entering their kingdom in discrete contrabass,  

When the orchestra begins to play
serene melodies eternally free,
drifting over gifts of hypnotic beauty,
lifting you out from the depths of the sea.

/            every time the soloist breaks into
a solo...
     i start fidgeting!
            imitating a "paraphrase"
  of a conductor, allowed an orchestra!
alas!
      all, and all, that i own...
              are.... shadows!
          yet every time!
      the soloist from the soviet choir
on the song kalinka breaks into a solo?!
          i break form,
    of a body, otherwise intact,
hunched over a computer keyboard!

         the choir on the song
kalinka?!

       one hand imitation
of a piano
on my behalf?

most of the times up relistening
i'm "thinking":

  thank god it's not
the overplayed o fortuna
by orff!

     finally!
  i can relive visiting
  the mariinsky theatre!
  
        shambles! ******-attires!
and english satire!
  
   bravo!
    applause! applause! applause!                /

an anatomy of a maxim, originally: the greatest trick the
devil ever pulled was convincing the world the world that
he didn't exist... perhaps, but what
was the conviction, what ontology lay
behind it, was it pre-existential (Cartesian)
or existential (Sartre's)? we're not
talking gambling with Pascal - we're not talking
games anymore - i'll explain later.
i have too many concrete references to throw
at you, where you'll make this whole affair
a scandalous one that i didn't invent myself,
but we're all refining our meanings,
in youth prescribing unknown to us
slang vocabulary to filter through the included
and the excluded, i always wondered where
slang originated, and to what purpose,
the Beat poets and novelists licked the topic
of slang with their addictions to subplot the
demands for a bubble-effect and a non-touch policy...
i was watching the Olympics today,
and i was watching the height of plagiarising Greek
in Pax Romanum, and it felt very civilised,
an equal contest, handshakes of the defeated,
they are after all games, we're not been equal,
let's celebrate Achilles and remember him
for no depressive isolating ******* when drinking
Dionysian epilepsy of refill, refill, so we remain drunk
and memory of him keep us drunk!
but no, oh no, modern men don't know what
to do heroes, or such memories that might
detach us from thinking ourselves likewise;
oh the slur of jealousy, so much angst, among ably
bodied and among the disabled, the disabled have
no sight of a plateau to look up to among the ably
bodied, they're rotten to the core -
and i know where premature dementia stems from...
i was watching the Olympics today, and it felt so
healthy, but then i watched the opening of another
sport... football... and i put on Salem's debut album
on the speaker, songs like sick, release the boar,
trapdoor, and i felt a reminder of the fall of
the western Empire, and when the Norse men
came against the Roman plagiarism of Greek culture
after the Trojan immigration to Italy after the defeat
at Troy, and Hector dying glorious by a glorious
hand of Achilles, and Achilles dying from luck
for the prototype of Tinder man of Paris, ***** licking
boot straps marching to fake debility...
oh, if you don't have a mobile phone, and never used
the Tinder application, you can see the super-charged
desperation of women, porcelain dolls pretending it
was always hard luck and too much eager ****...
they book the cheapest tickets to the Opera house
to see Bolshoi ballet, they even buy tickets that only
allows them to stand... after the second act there's no
sign of them... they disappear, no Tinder swipe
no Pokemon... better chances looking for either
in Auschwitz (as i heard has happened, Auschwitz,
well, thank god people go to fake mourning and a digital
theme park at the same time, at least the hens and stags
have Prague... they call us the forgotten Europeans...
maybe this is the precise intention of what i once
mentioned concerning the ONE LESSON IN TAO:
to aid the world, let the world forget you,
in order that you might forget the world.
seeing la corsaire we had anna nikulina as Medora,
mikhail lobukhin as Conrad, nina Kaptsova as Gulnare,
vitaly biktimirov as Birbanto (the *******),
denis medvedev as Lankendem and alexei loparevich
as Sāid Pasha... the major dances...
- pas d'esclaves by kristina kretova and igor tsvirko,
- danse des forbans by kristina karasoyova (soloist),
                                       anna antropova, anna balukova,
                                       evgeny golovin, denis savin,
- pas de trois de odalisques by yanina parienko,
                                        xenia zhiganshina, elvina ibraimova,
- le jardin animé............................................................­........
- grand pas de eventailles......................................................­.....
lonely girls at the opera, phones in the interludes, swiping
left, swiping right, a boy without a phone,
behind me two young women trying to strike conversation
about ballet exclusively, nothing human, just prepared for
the stage... what an awful talk, and talk, and talk...
no talk about excessive clapping... out-of-time clapping...
i'm truly living among barbarians... i might not be as rich
as these barbarians, but i wouldn't care to clap so much,
i guess the logic is: i payed so much money for this ticket
i better make my presence felt.
as i already said, i did take Ezra Pound on the commute,
i should have taken Kant... on the way back from central
London heading into the west i felt patronising
tourist eyes of misguided voyeurism, here one minute,
gone the next... only the devil sweats with shame in hell,
while everyone remains cool and in denial at being in one...
i was just standing on the tube, reading a book of poetry...
i turned into Niagara Falls... sweat on my back,
sweat on my front... while everyone else remained
surprisingly well hydrated, i looked like i just ran a marathon...
so after watching the Olympics i watched the dark ages emerges,
two strands of sport... god almighty and the barbarian's
religiousness of sports, so hellbent-anti-bohemian,
intimate secretes of Onan as a chant with that curled finger
jerking sideways movement... after watching a few days
of the Olympics, the empty seats, the few remaining lights
of this world... i got a cyst pool of ****** bound maggotry...
dad says to son: as my dad said unto me: 'ammer 'em in!
but now i know where premature depression comes from,
under communism we flourished with our imagination,
we played hide & seek into the night,
even when they imported Nintendo and comics we
were hardly moved... hardly the ones to be domesticated
and zoologically probed by anaemic paraphrasing -
we lived outdoors, we slept indoors, we used to eat
sunflower seeds, freshly baked bread, drink
cheap lemonade, go foraging for mushrooms -
idealism of some sort? but none of us were given
pharmacological attractions to treat - we were
given a childhood - even in England we managed to
play with Pokemon cards, to be puberty riddled geeks,
but then things changed... none of this new generation
of youth is given the same childhood chances,
in my youth few already experimented with ***,
teased us all that it was the highest achievement -
back then we still had people to look up to -
strange how i bypassed ****** pubescent development,
when the first boy masturbated he'd be *******
*****... i'd be ******* a sensation aged 8 or 7...
and said it felt good, i didn't involve a church doctrine
that life begun somewhere other than after the birth...
as it might be reasonable inspection that mere death,
sudden, et tu Brutus?, is like an *******,
the fetus later, then birth, the migraine of mourning,
the ***** training (getting used to angels),
the ****... takes us several years to record our
first memory, some might go back as far as being 4
years old... no further, whoever says they can remember
prior is mixing what's presented to them for distortion...
i can't distort my first name and my favourite footballer's
surname in the 1990s world cup (lothar matthäus),
or the satirical sketch show about Solidarity:
**** wałęsa (lew) was the lion, tadeusz mazowiecki (żółw)
the turtle, jacek kuroń (hipopotam) the hippo -
the memory of the "turtle" politician always made me fall asleep.
to be honest, the maxim sounds better not because the devil
denied he existed, but because God denied he existed,
once having proven he did, he denied it with such force
that his marriage to the chosen people became a brief
marriage to the elect / intellectual people... but then that
failed too... we're at the last stage... with Islam teaching
us the original intention of man having to relationship
with god... when Muslims teach us kung fu and judo and
yoga and stop trying to censor our vocabulary,
teach us mutual respect, a divorce from writing poetry
to solely embrace the Koran... when they finally realise
they have become more decadent than anyone would
have thought give their discovery of oil under the dunes...
the greatest trick the
devil ever pulled was convincing the world that
he doubted his own existence; and all because he knew
that god denied his own, as became apparent in modern
politics, that the sole tactic politicians used to perpetuate
their authority was in the playground of using denial...
but it was never a playground... oddly enough
doubt and denial mingle like the Cartesian mind-body
duality - but when looking at children i know
that children do not understand doubt, too many games
to play to doubt them, hence the crippling uncoupling
from imagination later on, they're real, undoubted games,
hence the child's complete immersion in them:
whether Walt Disney lived and provided for the lost
children is none of my business.... children don't know
doubt, they have no knowledge of thought per se, thought
per se identified as ego... they know only one form of
lie: which is denial, intuitive lying... doubtful lying is
in good interest only a wavering, but nonetheless a straight line...
if ever doubtful lying ever persisted - even the Koran states
something about non-believers... it states nothing about
quasi-believers... the sort of: well... as long as that
martyr walks into a harem, where all the 72 virgins
are actually prostitutes, and he can stomach their piercing
eyes, then we'll think about giving him 72 authentic brides
to deflower.

in a house, where a bonsai tiger sleeps listening
to jack johnson's in between dreams
(realising his loathing for radio transmission
dynamics of advertisement and talk when
the album fills a full hour of ear drum concerns,
and in a house where upstairs frank zappa's
hot rats plays in unison to a man on a windowsill
musing: 'by god, zappa did a john coltrane
in a symbiosis with a love supreme; there's only
one vocal track on the album, the rest
is sheering saxes to grizzly.

poetry, esp. non rhyming poetry to detached it
from musicology, poetry is after all
the oldest musicology without instrument
as whether dicing tongues protruding
made sneezing a new wheezing or coughing
to beat-box rapping, i guess it's like that,
well, non-rhyming poetry that old rekindling
adolescence needs to be less "scientifically"
itemised with theories to identify a metaphor
for a metaphor: just take it in one gulp as the whole;
it needs a detachment to lose all inhibitions
of self-consciousness and carve a route into
exhibitions, pompous art of music, this poetry,
so if not rhythmic rhyming at least interested
in music: a strong rhythmic section makes music
interesting, esp. when the bass guitar
is as important as the drum-kit - and gets equal
expression, unlike all those air-guitar soloist
techniques within the framework of critique of
the famed phrase 'intellectual *******,
thinking, epitome of liverpool's jabbing and upper-cutting
because of a football score because of a referee decision,'
same thing in music: big hair, make-up, solos
of guitars with over-burdening vocals - i need the rhythm,
i need the rhythm to enter the labyrinth and scatter think
by way out, by the odd chance right choice.
so scientific theory died with the higg's boson,
god got a mention, no need for scientific theories,
with my x-ray vision i see everyone wearing laboratory
coats and pretending to not have rats' whiskers and tails,
it's over, we need all theories to move into
humanism's area, from science just practicality,
but as always, we have the merchants and middle-men
who will stall human endeavour for a higher price
being reached by politico dynamite exploding
in curbing the populace for a horse-blinders of
angry rubric divisions into economy theorised.
so if i told you otherwise, would you tell me
the winter be bleak? i find winter refreshing,
after all, only in winter can you see the celestial
marriage of moon and sun, seeing how the moon
appears in the daytime and in the night is missing.
with that famous debate about pinpointing god
(existence - out of every instance? that's hard),
i'm not going to guise myself in a theological disguise
of spider and spider's architecture to eat with
the spiderweb his digestive system inside-out:
like a poet to his unvocalised muse: this word
isn't complete, it's an abandoned poem,
and hence us, we come in with scissors and pliers,
hammers and nail, due to the incompleteness of
this world we have a momentary chance to fill
it with ourselves... that creationism fight v. darwinism
is too claustrophobic for me, so anyway:
if i said to you the romans were better poets than
the greeks because the greeks gave names to
their phonetic units: alpha to omega in between
iotas, then i'd tell you the romans didn't name
their letters to be befitting for scientific constants,
on the basis of do re mi fa so la,
and hence i'd tell you romans were better poets
and the greeks were better fathers of shakespeare,
and i'd tell you homer was a greek and fathered
the tree major sons in rome: ovid, virgil, horace.
then i'd tell you our age has to have a lightbulb moment,
after the 1st prometheus stole or simply gave fire
unto man in order to be gnawed by a hawk
gnawing on his liver (metaphorically, might have
been a heavy drinker, drinker's hawkish vision),
a 2nd prometheus must come:
i'm guessing with some sort of magnetism to capture
zeus' wrath of a lightning storm...
2nd prometheus is rather dull, let's use etymology
to drive out a name for this man:
lightning bringer (αστραπαραδευς) - derived
from lightning and the word *deliver, the deliverer
of a godly essence - of course other ambiguities
can be crafted, but putting two nouns together
to create a compound, like -1 + -1 = -2,
so two nouns put together don't really create a
new noun, but couple a noun with a verb
and it's like -1 - -2 = 1... hence i didn't use
the greek word deliverer (ελεθερωτις /
eletherotis).

i don't know why,
            in a litre, that's 250ml gone,
on the basis that, working from 40%,
i'm figuring, 40% - x = 37.5%,
add the half and then add the 2...
what do you get? 40%.
               anyway...
                 these "hard" spirits
are perfect for mixers...
                     you get a perfect mix
of, say,           dark *** & pepsi,
to conjure up a sharpshooter known
as blackbeard; and that really is
a name for the most trivial cocktail.
    and when i mean "hard", i do mean "hard".
ever drink habsburg absinthe?
        that's nearing the 100% mark...
            or what one might call:
   the 10,000 indicator for: what wasn't
ran, but was drunk;
zeno's paradoxical centimetre or
inches or miles or kilometres come later,
or at least last...
   but this is fascinating... % = double negation
given that kant said, 0 = negation...
it's like a denial divided by denial...
           i know the symbol suggests more
omicron representation than a zee-ρ;
    never mind... it's the perfect fraction...
like a golden ratio, % = the perfect fraction.
the thing is though...
          i'm drinking this 37.5% dark ***
and thinking... if this **** was at 40%...
          i'd be worrying about not mixing it
properly...
            and this is a "hard" spirit after all...
it's not exactly habsburg absinthe,
        or a plum extract that's know by the name
of śliwowica, common in the tatra mountains...
which, like habsburg absinthe, is
nearing            the ten thousand mark;
but some strange reason 37.5% is the perfect
partner for a mixer... say... *** & pepsi...
whiskey & pepsi... ***** & pepsi...
        at 40% you're thinking... posh whiskey,
drank lukewarm... like a brandy / cognac.
37.5% is a ******* mystery to me...
       i actually can perfect the sharpshooter concept
with that balance... mingling 40% with a mixer
is... is... just ****** hard...
          sharpshooter? excess of spirit and
a little bit of a mixer...      a bit like... a shandy...
beer with a head of lemonade?
                                no? don't know it?
37.5%, and a litre of it?! and enough pepsi?
  i call that a friday night... as a party soloist;
oh i did to the laundry wasted today,
      almost anything done drunk is fun as ****,
you get all autistic, making patterns out
of the clothes and where they should hang
on the washing-line...
       red sock, blue sock... no... red sock red sock...
here!        blue sock... tartan pattern blue sock...
no...         ah! blue sock blue sock.... dangle here!
well... you know... people have their alternative hobbies.

Cold Sun with calling Raven
Morning soloist in the Cyan school tree haven
Wild berry blush , springtime zephyr maven -
relaying messages o'er crystal oceans of red wire grass
and brunette morning straw

Insect soloist of enormous color brushstroke
the given day
Cobalt- silver windows laced with
mountains of billowing steam , coveys
of timid Quail spark an afternoon of vivid dreams
A whisper of hope to awaiting ear , the
saccharin flavor of love filling warm air
The living day of Wren , Sparrow and Chickadee
The very hour of Live Oak , Sugar Pine and Mulberry
Fertile , vivacious stream beds on course for Gulf waters
Rainbow infused land of Cherokee Fathers* ...

Luscious Spring is wonderful avian theater ... The cameo appearance of Bradford Pear ,  a fragrant , beneficial Chestnut Tree of April ..

Melodious springtime , 'Creations Opus stage ..'
Voluminous , arthropod soloist , capering
the riparian rivers , break the searing afternoons ,
sing to me , the cool blessing of night ...

I'll listen with my heart
for the tune unheard;
for the soloist's song
sliding through the world.
I don't need to know the notes:
only feel the love.
I don't need to know the words:
only hum softly to the silence.

And when I'm dancing,
line by line,
to your sweet Harold
I'll play it all over again
just to feel your care,
just to know and smile and laugh

*because I know you're there.

i kept watching a few poetry reading videos
on the internet, and it scared me...
analogue after analogue...
          scared and angry poets shouting
and not one singing...
                                             oh man... they're
shouting, i'm blaming Ginsberg for this...
me? i'm the sort of man that sits up at night
waiting for his doctor to call him from
8 a.m. onward (time-frame? not designated)
                   while watching 1988's rain man
as the incompetent exaggeration of autism
thinking back to a poem about three
tiers of phonetic encoding
                                     and how that sorta relates
to how this autistic guy sees toothpicks
in clear number or how these geniuses
              of so called mathematical Olympics
are good at what they're good at, i.e.
    98723 + 2361 = ?
                                       like i am saying:
that's the key, a + b + s + i + n + t + h + e =
                  a good time... esp. if you have (cubed) sugar
and water to dilute the **** fairy into
                green milk... oh yeah,
this local guy sells the Hapsburg absinthe:
       £40 for less than 70cl... but at 95%... well you know...
    a soloist couldn't do better... but you need
    sugar cubes... got the spoon... only once
   in a blue moon...
                              but i'm serious
though... they can do numbers in the tip of their
little finger... but putting a and b together
        akin to something corresponding to their
genius with numbers? ask them about the concept
of money... well... that's me talking
about rain man...
                                     in the meantime i'm finishing
off my bottle of whiskey, at 6:33 a.m. it's
a dreary day, and i feel dreary tired,
            but on boy scout's honour... till the doctor calls
i'm sober...
                                         oh sure,
haven't seen a doctor in over a year...
                                       you can't these days,
you get cures over the phone...
                             and all they end up prescribing you
over here is paracetamol...
                        maybe that's better than with big pharma
in America...
                                lucky me, sleeping pills ******...
            but after rain man i got into watching
these poetry videos...
                              so much shouting:
rain man could be heard alongside having a seizure...
                   i just heard the same person
but in a different body... i thought i was hallucinating
for a while... and it came with the crescendo of
the mishap of weight v. mass and the Neil Armstrong
curse                     of yummy ivory plums
                            with a banjo accent... twang!
   babes are jaw-dropping-show-stoppers...
            they talk ******* like a plumber talks toilet...
               twang!                   and so hot with that
femininity                  bedroom politics
                                  straightened up -
           could be called evolutionary too...
                                    huh?
        you want my voice?                 i can give
you the encoding... but beyond this writing? pay up.
                        but yeah...
re-watching rain man was cool...
                             those poetry recitation videos though,
slams? yeah, slams they call them...
                              i dunno... maybe i'm too tired
and my senses are a bit dimmed...
                                 maybe sitting through
the sunset (English earl grey)
                       and now sitting through the sunrise
(English early grey)                   i'm feeling ******
and cactus like...
                                 or maybe i had that
moment of revelation: i'm a woman! and i'll
***** for all i care! burn the bras! burn the minis!
burn the thongs!
                                 dunno...
              drank the whiskey, smoked the cigarette,
ate a slice of pizza... waited and blinked from time to time
looking for uptight urban dwellers like
                a typical village idiot full of local mystery.

World’s most attentive listeners they are
Never ever speak out only vacantly stare
What you confide in them they quietly accept
Hide in their chambers all your secrets.

When got none to listen your pains and anguishes
Your heart breaks in silence shatter into pieces
Tears of your woes fall like pearl drops unseen
They’re the ones that see but hold them all within.

Sometimes you leave on them streaming river’s stain
They bear it for some time till passes by the rain
Refrains of your soloist heart all your soliloquy
They hear but never divulge friends are they truly.

They are made only to listen never to speak out
Safely share with them your worries your doubts
Within them would ever be hidden all your mystery
Till their ruins are found as relics of history!

i used to think i had a ******* problem,
                                                        as in: being addicted to it.
                       i used to ******* while taking a ****
on the toilet while watching either photographs
   (that's class, first rate, old school) or the odd video;
but then, something strange happened,
   maybe it's relatable to the promiscuity hierarchy of birds...
crows? never seen them at it,
                                       robins? never seen them at it.
woodland pigeons (with their distinct dog collar of white
around their necks)? never seen them at it.
ducks? never seem them at it.
      swans or canadian geese? never seen them at it.
it's those rats with wings! that's what londoners call
urban pigeons! ******* are ***** as a chance of gangrene!
and cuckoos! those ******* are ***** as ****!
                      so you see, there is a decency in the kingdom
of birds...           sparrows... well only in spring,
and you can see them do it, if they decide to build a nest
really close to your window... but i can excuse them...
because they're (and i have seen them do it) ****
but then there's the whole nest-building process.
    i'm cool with that... but those urban pigeons and cuckoos
are blimmin' disgusting.
      anyway... the most fascinating thing happened to me,
i turned all cenobite (a.ka. monk) after doing an exercise
that might blow your mind... it was a bit like:
  how on earth are you going to stop ******* yourself?
hmm?
                    it's not that easy to be frank...
   well...           watch a video of a pregnant woman putting on
a show on any the **** websites... no, not videos
            where she's being ******... soloists...
                you ******* to that sort of performance for about...
i'd say 10 times... and afterward... it's home and dry...
                   your ***** start to shrink, becuase they're becoming
condensed with *****... and that's that.
       oh yeah, when you abstain they shrink, becoming
    more and more chestnut hard... the more you *******
       the bigger they are... and emptier...
        hold on, 'old on... testicales are storage spaces...
                                                       ­     so what produces them?
and that's philosophy in a nutshell... asking really naive questions
for which there are already answers for, probably,
                 but awe, is not in certainty, it's in uncertainty.
once again, if this can be considered a "cure" with regards
     to *******...
       a pregnant woman soloist... like she might squeeze her
******* and milk flows out... or she might rub her foetus-enclaved
   abdomen...      (a) it's not a turn-off
               but          (b) it's a turn-off from ******* per se.
thank god this has happened... i was looking for it for
ages! i'm no urban pigeon or a cuckoo! over-sexualised and what?
                lamenting if you're not getting any?
           but that is exactly the exit strategy in an over-sexualised
culture... a pregnant woman doing a solo performance.
thank you, oh very much thank you,
                     i'm leaving with elvis, evlis has just left the building,
i'm bowing out, it was nice for the past 22 or so years,
     i'm starting to wonder: have i ever had a slush puppie?

.get to a million get to a million...
it's no dickens or a shakepeare... but...
get to a million get to a million...
it's not your everyday tabloid column...
but... get to a million get to a million...

all words outside of the italics...
said... really... real... slowly...
         Eeyore: sore...
                           i like how...
sodden sad i am with... a spike
milligan rendition of...
by the barrel of the rhyme -
this nonsense has to... be gloated...
float... 'ted...
             ballloons and buzzing... etc.

and those italics?
   gerbil on asteroids... and on steroids...
and... on amphetamines...
basics: on a cocktail...
   nibbling ferociously...
so ferociously that...
                      the tongue disappears...

i already have a: tomorrow will be...
"good"...
i don't like being pandered...
and this is that story of
a princess sleeping on twenty matresses...
agitated by an uncooked pea...

needle in the haystack for me...
this most perfect day...

   i'm using this old post-soviet
piece of equipment and...
it works brand new...
none of the samsung cheap ***** made
in china...
if i'll have my may...
and the garden needs no imporvement:
a new shed... blah...
it already looks like a building site...
i managed to tranfer a tonne of
birdseye pebbles from
the service road into the garden...

imagine the fate... of those...
sentenced to: kamieniołomy...
a quarry... i'm not exactly deluding myself
in the act already deluding me...
a hammer... perfecting what was
a farmers' suntan just below the elbows...
so i rolled my sleeves up...
for compensation...

   imagine sentencing a man to work
among stones... friko! gratis!
for... the "blessing"...
       but if i take the walk...
this, walk... i'm keeping up appearances
up to a point... then the masquerade is over...
nothing to hear but ***** horses...
magpies... woodland pigeons and crows...
nothing of assorted competing
propaganda placentas...
no cushions: no bed: count sheep...
that, tiresome, task?
how about making out: complex
"geometry" from clouds...
see castles? see swans?
see devils charging into battle
having donned the men-yoroi?!

the past... and so much for the romance...
the vikings should be known as:
the warlike gypsies... ******* pikeys and all!
sword for a harmonica...
a longboat for a... heap of castanets...
and... that... accordion? no?
the new... "napels"?
the violin... the new sax...
new: yo! ollie!
    *******...
  
         - i said i'd ******* walk it!
i did it once come sunset...
i said... i did it once in reverse: got lost:
feet became muddied...
i returned...

             this is where we'd part...
i'd ******* from the B175...
parallel to the orange tree pub...
next to the bower house...
   when walking? no point taking
the B175 up to A113... no... seriously...
there isn't...

into the havering country park...
how many times...
did i walk this "short" and "narrow"...
letting off the body known
that the breath is bound
to a duality of soul...
and "more lungs to uncover...
major major"...

       exercise: gym: pristine **** film
perfect... swimming is fun...
riding a bicycle is fun...
the rest remains a vanity project...

         i might as well be hoarding...
so from having made an exit via
B175... i end up coming back into
contact with traffic... at...
via hainnault forest of course...
at... A1112...
          
when it was especially crisp...
and winter was the *****...
watching the widow and widower swans...
at moonlight...
that's the only:
that's the best time to appreciate swans...
come a fullmoon... come the trickling
of mercury into the details of:
ghostly white: for the worth of swans...
and none other...

  and if i meet a Wordsworth on the way?
i'll strangle him with a shoelace...
hell... i'll hang him by one...
tell 'im to sniff a boot on the way out...
and a soggy sock: for practice...

from what i read:
so much for the countryside while at the same
time having... to entertain...
the garden prior to the fall:
a ****-buddy of a sister...
the foreboding mid-west...
televangelists and a-o.k. ******:
   like that physicist... who said:
brother and sister have a get together:
as long as: rubbers included...

caricature on the simpsons...
google-whacking won't even allow me
search results...
then again: sloppy seconds...
    'ere we go: lawrence krauss...
simpsons guy...
  
robinson crusoe ahoy! quick!
sink... this... ******* ship!
let's me it look like a melodrama
for environ... mentalists...
let's make it look like a beached
whale... rather than a ghost wreck
holding lost secrets of lineage:
among the arabs? muhammad ibin...
         ibin...
among the jews? yeshua ben...
   ben... blah: ibin! blah ben!

- so so much for solo...
  solo violin, solo piano...
solo... rubbing chicken with carribean
**** sauce... slaughtering a lamb,
kosher, also solo...
    ham solo... solo: project undertaken
with concern for...
no concerns except for: solo...
soloist... soliloquy... solipsism...
bored mushroom head: kanughonzagi
shimoto hiroshimmyshimmy oops...
bulldozer... machine 'ed on... 'ed off...
a party twick: don't look so surprised...

that's: "not me in your third person"
gemoetry...
well... within the trinity, secular...
of the son, ego, the father, superego...
and the holy spirit of id...
jerking off is on the same platitude
of performing *******...
in verse of reverse: eating an oyster
or a floral "pattern"...

here's to not having to find strangers:
notsably pakistani men willing
to convert...
thank be for the jews: at least they can't
convert you: ****** in them the concept
of being chosen...
like this mirage of static...
perhaps the wind does disturb this
equilibrium... then again... does it?

upon the altar of the sky before me...
a curious "star"...
that it isn't...
it has to be a planet...
i'm guessing that it's either
Venus or Jupiter...
and if my naked eyes were able to
decipher the experience...
from what the postcard of
Saturn looks like: truly:
flesh, blood and eyesight to
compensate:
why do almost all alien lifeforms concern
me with microscopic items?
i had to wrestle a mammoth
i had to overcome a tiger...
i didn't exactly find myself:
finding *****...
champagne and l.s.d. but not
mushrooms...
the fungus hitchhiker of 1960s
psychadelic intelligenstia...

i need to only die this once...
there is no god: there is no god...
"god"...
this is a house... that requires
a breath to deem it: an abode...
a home is a foreign concept in the mouth
of a mongolian horde...
crimea if a capital...

      a tartare steak... a raw herring
in yogurt sauce with apples and gherkins...
a spice for the palette...
if tomorrow is supposedly a day...
i will sacrifice a dream: all dreams!
for a day like i plan for tomorrow...
to come into contact with reality...

no love is ideal... even that of a madman...
or a gisberg... homosexual latex gimp
plaything... savvy?!
two to a rucksack
of the tow of beers i need to give birth
to a quasimodo...

"broken": to have broke - sober -
then drunk... the barking of a drop load
of ******* of an alsatian...

   we so tire... we all must tire so...
such: we! sire: i! oh... but i'm not bargained
to don a crown!
pontius pilate... the escapade
of the thief... of the coward...
or the status quo tactician...

by now... does it... would it...
even... even ******... *******... matter
to parade in all that pomp and desires
for a spontaneity of... ahem...
"spontenity"?!

better worded: i agree: genius to genius...
one would never curse...
etiquette! my boor and bore...
one must be well fashioned
to stage the pirouette of "proper"
knife and fork handling...
as... the napkin is to supposed to be bound
to never find any better use!

the air i want to breathe...
              is it... really...
the complications of chemistry...
curb... no new: every old...
           one always has to find it necessary
to fall in love with paris...
and grow perptually boring
within the confines of london;
apparently all else... vivo per se...
is supposed to "happen" & "here"!

A young girl dreamt of being a dancer
She is a wonderer of movement
A soloist of rhythm
A listener of tempo

She gracefully lands her toes
Swirls and twists to show
An expression of owe
For the gift from her soul

But there was a time she landed
A terrible fall she shouted
Her legs were shaking
Her feet was aching

She lost track of time
Every beat was denied
Tears were flowing in her eyes
She felt left, betrayed and lied

But she recalls her first few steps
To why she started to count from
5..6..7.. and 8
To up, down, leap and have faith

She stands up and tries
Wiped her tears and smile
Swings to the music and reach for the aisle
Bows down with shinning light

Applause is all she hears
Congratulatory cheers
She felt loved and peace
Whenever she moves her 2 left feet

Confiding
In your belief
Senses revived
You raised me up
To a different plain
Awaiting eternity
Prefect motions
A pathway higher
You need no
Introduction
Epitome of all
You took
The shackles off
And no longer does the darkness
Reign over me
Prisoner of war released
The ultimate imprint
Stamp of approval
Even when I feel
Like I’ve done nothing to deserve it
The sum of all
Personas the vast majority of
All we see
Nothing greater
A divine providence
You retrieved a
Lost traveler
The things
I suffered through
Early on
Don’t compare to
Your unlimited sacrifice
Deep rooted
My struggles groomed
Who I have become today
Coming to the realization
Your behind anything
I could ever comprehend
A soloist who taught me
What it feels to be alive again
My one shining star hallelujah

and i can sit, on a windowsill, perched and bound
to fake demure, and then listen to
                      an adhaan... and weep...
              a weeping to state joy?
a concrete emotion?
i'll sit, perched, and hear only
the many diacritical invocations of A...
all the gnostic symbolism speaks of
the A with eyes...
          but does it depict the A with ears?
http://tinyurl.com/o92pavd...
who is dajjal if the question is whether
or not he has one eye, yet whether
he has but one ear?
  why can't i receive the same emotional
comfort from the study of grace,
in castrato tongue, in Handel or Bach?
   why are there so many "diacritical"
variations of a single letter... such as A,
alpha, or ah?
             why must this vowel resound
so pristine, and i gain so much emotion
from it, as to be reduced to shed
those tears?
              it's but one vowel...
          and it stretches, on and on, and on...
something that could almost be homosexual,
for i am prone to react to a man singing
than a woman proclaiming the onomatopoeia
of ****** that translates in house,
son, daughter, a kitchen...
             provisions of all sorts...
why then, in this adhaan so i see A, equipped
with all the possible diacritical fascinations
i implored to see?
      it's but one word... ah                 lah...
and the trembling contained in it...
        why could but one word contain my tears?
or a way to possibly extract them
with the least possible due to do so?
mind you, i am drinking ***** and coke...
is that why i'm crying?
  why would i be called european,
and drinking ***** and coke and listening
to an islamic adhaan and crying?
huh? is this the point where i wonder
if i'm living in western society and "suddenly
disocver" i'm gay?
is this the part? maybe i like music too much,
and with the adhann and, e.g. le triou joubran
i think christianity has made music ugly...
and i'm trying to listen to something beautiful?
is that the point where i say it?
that one adhaan is probably the only thing
i would care to listen to if the rest of the world
of music tried ****** my hearing ever again...
and can the western world not spot the weakness
it's spreading?
          why should i drink ***** and appreciate
an adhaan?
   why?! i speak zilch of arabic...
   so why the heavy heart?
              why the tears?
                 what could possibly serve this prompt
that has happened to me before?
   who are we to not claim that religions
are to enforce poetry,
and the more beautiful the poetry,
the more the stance to endure...
          when islam started singing it's praises
they took to singing the psalms of king david...
how horrid that sound came from the depths
of aeons... king david had a lyre...
   how could you sing the psalms with many
instruments?! and, say, a choir rather than
a soloist?
              the adhaan is but one voice,
and some refrigerator background noice equivalent
to an ambient soundtrack...
        i just see christianity in england
as this stale mummy, with a church packed by
old virgins... and in poland (being a catholic
nation): zombies... pigeons... cult adherents...
  and oh that dreaded mea culpa mantra...
like everything really was my fault...
   go to poland, go into a church,
and let them recite their creed.... zombies!
a satanic cult!
    at least in islam you get to abstract praise
my imitating about to receive ****...
**** me, isn't it a multicultural world after all, eh?
and it only became possible
by investing in a self-proclaimed x-men
               quickening of evolution...
just a bit of ******* on a woman, and a man...
   being cut off...
you do know that dobermans were a breed of dogs
that had their ears cut, so they wouldn't be floppy
and instead pointy and therefore more
fearsome? well, never mind the tail being cut off;
rottweilers? that's a cow-head...
   would a bulging dog-head really look
fearsome with pointy ears added to it?
a fat head / a big head, according to the film
unbreakable is characterised due to its
size by an inherent unpredictability...
and therefore necessary evil... you can't really
add to it... a rottweiler with snipped ears
can never make up for the lean doberman,
being its cousin...
well, you see, i can appreciate an adhaan being sang...
but this thing about muslims and
not wanting to keep dogs or cats in their house...
oh just this one case of talking to an old
pakistani on a bench in a park,
and he said he said cats were ***** creatures...
but there's this story about muhammad
and his favourite cat... huh?!
   well... there you go... i know as much
about nothing, as you know as much about nothing
that could ever convince me to
    do something that you would approve of,
or thereby exploit for whatever reasons,
beginning with being, merely entertained;
modern day british converts...
                                                  use­ful idiots;
i'm sorry, but that's how it looks...
of the ones that converted, how many of them ever
weeped listening to an adhaan? one? any?!
that doesn't mean i'll don a taqiyah -
if i have that emotional intelligence / response
to it;
   i call it a bit like a man trying to prove
he's masculine and punching a boxing bag;
ah, the bit that's goo-choc and you get to see
the fraility in every man, not borne from violence
and all that's easily seen...
   but something hidden.

it was like if colors could make sound:
an aria of light and I was the soloist,
slowly singing, linking each note with the next:
dissonant noises.
not all sounds are pleasant.

thank you
for teaching me that hurt heals
and anger subsides.

lessons worth learning are hard.
hard as rocks, which press you, mash you into pulp.
but even mush and marrow have purpose.

(thank you). the bitterness of my
appreciation does not escape me.

after the großartig composers...
there can only be
                    the great pianists...
you can do all you want
appreciating someone like
   joe satriani:
             but a guitar can never
become a piano:
   none of that hushes suspense
of a piano soloist...
  even a violin requires back-up
(akin to schindler's list
main theme)...
           but... piano...
                 schumann,
                satie,
              debussy,
         ­        chopin,
                    liszt...
                  schubert..­.
          campanella's
   reinterpretation of wagner...
a piano can stand
alone,
        and doesn't even,
remotely,
  require the harangue
of an orchestra
  (listen 'ere,
you uneducated swine -
sort of scenario)...
     no opera...
            but piano:
like... listening to the uniformity
of rain drops
  falling onto a tin roof...
mind you:
i have to return
to the slaughterhouse music
of modernity
   with its heavy influence
on stressing rhythm, drum...
as much as i do enjoy
the aloofness,
   the ivory tower music...
   i have to come down
to the horse-hooves
and buckles
    of THUMP... THUMP...
as much as i appreciate it...
i can't be sat
next to these porcelain
            aenemics for long...
from on high,
to from down below...
       i need the current music
of the slaughterhouse.
- but only a piano can pierce
the silence...
   and relieve something
akin to the royal albert
concern hall...
        with an unanimous
revelation of...
   that trembling
before the satiated
             sound of: a sigh;
as if to confirm:
            yes... you are alive.

There is kindness and sadness
some crazy mixed up madness
and that is us,

we are
shopping trolleys on a bus
full of purchase, but
closed away.

don't tell anyone you saw me
is
the mantra of the day.

I despair
I really do
can't get through to some
and you can blame it on the sun,
I blame the times we're living in.

After our love, I lie in the shadow of your shoulder

also, float to the sound of the seventeen-year locust outside,


their forlorn tenor buzz that ascents and falls together

and all of a sudden it stops, and flares out once more.


Their cadence clears against the sides of the house,

stirs like late leaves, a delicate edgy scratching,


the ave, ave, ave syllables of air, skin against skin.

When we happened to come upon her yesterday, inside the church shadows,


the youthful soloist deserted herself to the words she sang,

her interpretation like a nonattendance of dialect. Her music


cast itself away and away, beating on, until the hush

of a vacant room had its spot, where the heat of day


is just lamplight through the recolored windows.

It channels over the dusty floor. It lights


upon a light blue divider, unpredictable in what it touches.

What's more, the deriding, mating voices of the grasshoppers return once more


in their consistent journey out of the earth,

out of the dull, into the shadows.

Her body was a city.
Filled with folk who spoke with their hands.
Nothing was ugly. The way that they vocalized.
She lived in the street, watching every little thing come alive.
Her body was a city where most times we sat in the car.
With no idea where we were going.
Most of the time just sitting there with the music playing.
I loved going places with her, most times just sitting still.
There wasn't just one landmark that stood out. Often time loosing sense of direction.
*** heard through the ears of a leaky car and rattling tailpipe.
Her body had a culture of it's own.
Moet' shaped frame, cigar paper still wove tight. Still in the package. 
Rich in the sound that came alive soon as her eyes closed. The same color of her car.
Each little thing contributed to the support of how she dreamed with her eyes open.
The folk whom spoke with their hands. lost in a multitude of conversation.
Everything came  to life with each passing glance.
A few folks walking pass, the corner store still lit.

Sitting in a still car, promoting live art.
The little orange wrench popping up on the dashboard motioning perspective.
Often a soloist, she'd let me visit by the hum of buzzing lights.

Wooden street poles, medium sized plastic aluminum and glass.
We sat under the street light in a mid sized sedan without need for seat belts.
Rich in the sound that came alive soon as her eyes closed.
I myself became a resident.
Following the songs she'd play. 
I'd listen intently often forgetting everything she just said.

The contact of screen to phone. The back drop of  lights ringing in silence.

Volume cut low, Most of the time just sitting there with the music playing.
Everything just seemed to disappear in the percussion her body would make.

The swift motion her hips would make,
The songs she'd mouth to herself.
I wasn't completely hopeless.
Just in love with the blues

CONTINUING WITH THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS
HERE IS THE STORY BEHIND THE ENGLISH HYMN:
          “ONWARD  CHRISTIAN  SOLDIERS”

"Onward, Christian Soldiers" is a 19th-century English hymn. The words were written by Sabine Baring-Gould in 1865, and the music was composed by Arthur Sullivan in 1871. Sullivan named the tune "St Gertrude," after the wife of his friend Ernest Clay Ker Seymer, at whose country home he composed the tune. The Salvation Army adopted the hymn as its favoured processional. This piece became Sullivan's most popular hymn. The hymn's theme is taken from references in the New Testament to the Christian being a soldier for Christ, for example II Timothy 2:3 (KJV ) :  "Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ."

Now Arthur Sullivan was the son of a military bandmaster, who composed his first anthem at the age of eight, and was later a soloist in the boys' choir of the Chapel Royal. ... To supplement the income from his concert works he wrote hymns, parlour ballads, and other light pieces, and worked as a church organist and music teacher.

    LYRICS OF THE FAMOUS HYMN
“Onward, Christian soldiers, marching as to war,
With the cross of Jesus going on before.
Christ, the royal Master, leads against the foe;
Forward into battle see His banners go!
o Refrain:
Onward, Christian soldiers, marching as to war,
With the cross of Jesus going on before.
At the sign of triumph Satan’s host doth flee;
On then, Christian soldiers, on to victory!
Hell’s foundations quiver at the shout of praise;
Brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
Like a mighty army moves the church of God;
Brothers, we are treading where the saints have trod.
We are not divided, all one body we,
One in hope and doctrine, one in charity.
Crowns and thrones may perish, kingdoms rise and wane,
But the church of Jesus constant will remain.
Gates of hell can never ’gainst that church prevail;
We have Christ’s own promise, and that cannot fail.
Onward then, ye people, join our happy throng,
Blend with ours your voices in the triumph song.
Glory, laud, and honor unto Christ the King,
This through countless ages men and angels sing.”
……Posted by Raj Nandy of New Delhi.……

forever in their shadows
only if you stay still
it takes but a sidestep 

in blinding light
find yourself bright
stage lights beam

in all angles vary
step out of darkness
into your own light 

in life's Olympiad
keep steady your pace
run your very own race

in life's grand opera
you are a soloist-
there are no second voices

in life's orchestra-
you are a symphony
there are no second fiddles

in life's parade
a winding cavalcade
there are many drums

two items of interest, that make sense
in an english society these days,
susanna hoff... mm, mm...
             a gal that makes
jerking off a tedium...
                                     what?!
- ****, said it out-loud,
romancing an italian got me
everty, single time,
just the sort of thing that
aged, nearing retirement polish
galls get up to,
spicing up their retirement age.
the exfoliation of the 80s hairstyles
makes a lot of sense with
a niqab thrill for a fake *****....
      she can call it modesty -
i just call it faking latex lucy
with her celluloid -
  pucker that one, *****?
                       yoju know what,
i actually hate living around
these nincompoopss....
                     politics actually made
sense in the victorian era,
not the second Elizabethan era,
ma'am...
          sorry, you cultivated
a generation of window-lickers....
         you'd sooner get more of
these, things,
   if you chopped their limbs off...
they're not even equipped
at flapping,
     imitating wings...
                       let's call it a blockbuster
evening's end by suckling on
the suggestion,
when idi amin cut off
the limbs of his cheating bride
              kay amin -
and, miracle! behold!
             he reattached her feet
to the place where her hands ought to be,
and also reattached her hands
where her feet out to be!
     that, i thought, was a spectacular
caterpillar...
      many memories of fluttering
butterflies came from that image,
   let me assure you!
            duck fat written all over it!
mm... yum!
                 sorry...
i always get the impression that
the english have to write sarcasm to
invite parody.
hmm... maybe it's just me...
perhaps i'm a soloist in guising
the current affairs.
maybe not being black enough
will wake the Zulu in me
to match up to, tailor and suit up
adorning the english youth and
thinking nothing of:
               those limbs aren't 'elping,
are they, if we're really
serious about growing these
gluttonous barons of bloat and carnal
flesh, with an inner narrative
that resides in a scrap-heap dubbed:
Newton... what's the point
of a wasted pint's worth of time?

we have finally arrive
once citizen of a different country
sailed through water and sky
here to dwell in this land

upon arrival, we sort for life
while accustoming to change
like eyesight trying to focus in light
after being long in the dark

we worked the factories
with our hands bruised
our back bent and spent
embracing winter's frigid air
and summer's sweat

we held on the blue lifestyle
bounding it around our neck
like a diamond collar
fetching for a dream

we sort soloist in the change
holding on to the little that didn't change
reminding ourselves that we came here to make a change
after giving all away for a change

Now we are chanting back to this land
we, the very backbone with which she stands
our song filled with pride
of toil and lost
an overwhelming sacrifice

we sing as we fill upper ranks
taking on prestige professions
leading up the charts
we sing on and we climb

i've finally accepted my opinion on the ultimate song...
esp. after a ****** shift at the London Stadium:
West Ham vs. Lyon...
  there's not other song that keeps me.... groovy...
up-beat... even though we had about five pitch-intrusions...
runners... whatever...
i was mouthed off for not doing my job:
even i was on the opposite side of the pitch
and... no one was paying me to be a supervisor...
mouthed off for other people not doing their job...
clueless sputnik sort of people...
the whole: penguins of Madagascar... just smile and wave...
middle-aged *******: do your job...
then apologies... but me being the negotiator:
sir, i understand you... the passion... no one wants
a pitch-invasion, even if it's by a soloist...
yes, kind sir, thank you for your criticism...
people need to be herded...
i don't have a c.c.t.v. type of third crow of Odin
on my shoulder to check on everyone,
for ****'s sake!
        then this *******... with a walking stick...
ugly inside and out...
i could understand: humble... not this sort of crap...
that's why he's a *******: in my eyes...
because he has ugly insides...
moans into my ear... but i paid £71 to watch this match!
i can't see **** because of the steward standing up!
sir... we're supposed to stand up just before
the end of the match...
but i paid £71 to watch this match!
may i suggest, buying a ticket... so you're sat
a bit higher up?!
  i actually love this job... which isn't really a job...
crowd management...
i'm more used to dealing with inanimate things...
applying them...
what a glorious precursor to dealing with
children in a classroom... the mascots fist-bump me...
as to the colt... i also have my usual crowd...
i blow kisses to them they retort with:
we love you! and what the **** am i?
some ******* high-viz. traffic cone...
    that's all i am...  or am i?
    i forget to get to know myself in these situations...
i just checked on the Muslims in the crowd
breaking fast... you have your candy-bar?
or are you on the strict date breaking of the fast
diet? joked aside with another Muslim lad...
so... is it true? some of the Ummah binge eat
when the sun goes down?
oh, i agree... another one of those sly *******...
a feeling of conversation soon turned into a feeling
of conversion... trouble is...
ha ha... sure... i'd tell him... i'd convert...
but... i'd convert to ****'ite Islam... not Sunni...
that's a worthwhile joke... to keep...
  sure... i'll convert... but... i don't want to convert
to Sunni Islam... i want to convert to ****'ite Islam...
because... PBUH: Muhammad was a man
that didn't keep his word...
                    then again, i figured...
there could possibly be a third splinter in Islam...
that the Turks could take care of...
Arabs and Pakistanis in the middle...
Persians being one outlier...
Turks being the third...
  so composed within the confines of European
cosmopolitanism...
besides the Byzantines... who spent the most time
in the Balkans? not the Ottoman Turks?!
well then! sorted!
            why dates?! how about a handful of
Brazil nuts, or pecan nuts?!
what's with these ******* Arabs and
diabetes... oh sure... drinking it bad...
but SUGAR: GOO' GOOD...
sure... not enough sugar... chop a hand off...
chop a leg off...
it truly was a ****** ****... i arrived at Romford
and said to myself... better walk it off...
drink two ciders on the way home...
eat some... vegetarian spectacular wrap...
smoke... admire the moon...
thick skin, though...
whatever the people were saying...
with my usual crowd i just blew kisses...
shook hands... it was all good...
as the break guy i could have watched the match...
yawn... i found out that... football?
is best watched on t.v.: when at a football match
i rather watch the crowd...
but i've switched off...
it should have been the song akin to:
a-ha's cry wolf,
duran duran's the reflex...
roxette's - watercolours in the rain...
prokofiev's lieutenant kije suite / battle on the ice...
boney m's cover via placebo:
daddy cool... no... that will never cover it...
bohemian like you by the dandy warhols...
no chance...
  girls aloud - the show... nope...
vaughan williams;:
        fantasia on a theme by thomas tallis
nope...
nothing by early madonna: i tried material girl...
no chance...
there's only one song...
cel-ah-brate... believe me...
  i can't be wrong...
    i can be wong... but i can't be wrong...
KOOL & THE GANG: CELEBRATION....
sure... and all those underappreciated black artists
by zee weißvolk!
          ficken-du-zu!
                    fickereiwic­hsenarbeite!
*******-****-jobs...
      problem (aufgabe)? solved (
                                                          gelös­t)!
always with the: ****-it attitude... and always always best...
with s stern elevation of English into German...
no no... trying to pull off English into a Russian
translation... never cuts through the lard...
you can see the Russians... sons and daughters
of oligarchs... truly timid creatures...
but the rich kids of China at Fulham?
          solipsistic... ******* on lemon type of crowd...
****... you're right... they just might be...
smuggling prunes in their *******...
sometimes... you never really know...
        ugh... where's the Ummah's position on
the Uyghurs? no suicide bombing in the part of the world?
pseudo-humans? so, so celebration of Islam
there? ******* double-standards if you don't
think those people as equal to your own:
Arabii cwowd... so much current stuff happening:
yet the trucks of peace: piece by piece of instestines
being dragged through the streets of Nice...
the joyous parties surrounding Cologne...
let's just have a good time! goad:
milk the goats sort of fun time!
yeah-hoo!              party!
                             ­ while we're walking on egg-shells:
minding who gets to break fast! yeah-hoo!
the girls of Rotherham! gang-*****!
getting soaked in petrol! yeah-hoo!
          i'm a party man... i love to party!
i'm a party man! this is a party song! i'm in a part mood!
at one point being so respectable...
one close alternative: for a song...
PENDULUM: TARANTULA...
    that song came on and i was clubbing in Basildon...
i went... mental bruv!
                and when the music is right...
sure... but i'll covert... to the Turkish version of Islam...
don't you know... there's this third branch of
your religion, it's not ****'ite... it's... Turkish...
it began with barbers and prostitutes...
in the Balkans...
                it treats Jesus as: a son of Hell...
the Lord of Mosquitos...
the greatest troll Hell ever produced....
lord of mosquitos...
        לורד  של יתושים
                eh? lurd shl ysushim?!
well, it's a best kept secret... Hebrews have always
been a secretive types...
let them continue: preserving their ******* past...
what... ever...
          Jesus for me was... is...
a Prince of Hell... just as there was a prince of flies:
Beelzebub...
  he... was the Prince of Mosquitos...
blood turns to wine, wine turns to blood...
water turns to blood... blood blood...
and those 2000+ years with the inspiration
for the myths of vampires?! seriously?!
then, i, must, be, *******, clueless! asleep!
      only recently i've learned -
i have a weak-spot: ein schwachpukt:
          betreffend: ingwer-behaart-frauen...
gälisch: wahr-und-richtig...
          this: diese geistbetäubung beihilfe!
oh, i even talked with this Celtic beau!
ginger... i'm sworn to these women!
with a crusade... i call them shy auburns...
this one i talked about being  James Joyce
disciple... i was once a mythological blonde
type of guy... now? sure... blonde...
but more... strawberry blonde...
ooh... those red-heads...
            i hate chocolates...
but i want to drizzle them into the stuff...
i want their ginger to turn into brown!
into oak!
                  kiss me: because i have lost care....
how much i want to love...
per usual... so much is always missing.

this... this long awaited bottle
of wine; that's for omome,
but not you... if there's going to be
a me and you...
we'd needd a ms. amber...
and some hereafter...
that bouting with the bridge
and bride of hades
and... whatever...
come tomorrowland....
i will not birdge any gaps
or any other interludes...
save those bits that welcome
the last of life and that killing joke...
here, now, the better half of
me... closed circuit worth of a
pundit...

lingo sputnik that one into an equation
for the basis of oasis that
never clamoured to burden the eurotrash
with blur
and pigeon shtiting clarificastions....

manchester chequers...
n'ah n'ah hey jude... ******* worth
of wriggling and teasin'...
  
happy to have made cheese...
says anyone beside...
an alex james...
   gear up to be riddled, moi...
something sharpening in
tone-deaf pain...

no... 4 down-under
3 across a "crew"...
             he's also greaved in
the soloist "moisting up" of suicidal tendencies...
linger me for that spot
leverage: major major of rationed bacon...

you really don't want the kinds
of me crafting a ridicule of
your naked ***... making
tabloid "oops"
of that always appeasing moon
whips and tenures...

two birds with one stone...
except the arithmetic of twenty-two...
and there's a whoop-catch
of the better half of rottten tomorrows
of the intelligent:
hardly an i.q. tester, tester, count...

i come from this affair all..
all ******* dehydrated...
and fixated on a d.n.a. of the wirth
of argumentation for the worths of
tomorrow...

hardly the happy slap...
          we... the governing
lords of salem...
                        that last misendeavour;
culprit, corrupt...
of that what's best salvaged...

mein besitzen!
           az én saját...
                               mano savo!

refresh... the death upon the crucifix
of golgotha...
then again...
that death of being impaled...
to dangle with death in tow...
but then... being impaled...
all that glory-******* the tenets
of homosexuality...
then one is being impaled
via the transcedence of buggery?

it's one thing to dangle on
a crucifix... hands outstreched...
quiet another...
to have ones hands tied
behind one's back...
being impaled...

           na pal z tym skurwysynem!
i will just listen to enough
wading through the glories of
the cossacks mingling with
the crimean tartars before...

                             crucifixion is
hardly the worthy bargain of torture to be...
exemplified...
there are so many, more...
na pal...

   to be impregnated by a quest
of making **** *** normie-proud...
at the crux of where the pelvis ends and the coccyx
begins...
at the point where the birth of the iron maiden
welcomes the weeping willow...
as a response of being
the sulking bride of commerce...

i do pity the emblem of the crucifix...
there's being subject to the pike...
one can be made to suffice in this
instrumentation of torture...
with a leonardo da vinci exegesis...
the limbs extending...
but never quiet so on a pyke...

                          butterflies of all
held hostage high heavens...
as ever... the inglorious stump...
sharpened... a death proclaimed...
two weeks short but then
the interlude... of the agon. of "waiting"...

it's called the highest crucifixion...
the lesser **** forthcoming...
the hands are tied
and the body is made to pivot
on the pelvis come coccyx...

              no angel will come here:
in spite... or repose...

                    i have lost my amibitions
to imagine... thus, this,
this torrent of whimsical expenditures;
bone-breaking
copper nibbling skimming
of loitering examinations of:
the awaited loss of value.

He imagined her bones were hollow, quaint;
Needed for lift her
Body given to hummingbirds, A piacere soloist.
Twilight was her captor, dreams no one could persist I
Wonder why a childhood rents tenement in this-
Love, and the sleep-deprived sorryness for it