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"lumberjack" poems
I got sick of shaving Every day So I started growing a beard For a while, it was technically stubble But now it would make William T. Riker proud Or at least smile and nod in approval At the effort I bought a beard trimmer at Walgreens And I trimmed that ***** Made it nice and even But it itches a lot So I have to use dandruff shampoo on it when I can I get compliments on it From my mom and my brother Whose beard should belong to a Canadian lumberjack (Not my mom, my brother) I love this beard But I still get the urge to shave it completely And return to baby-face
0
Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 3:04 AM UTC
Beard Growing
*I stopped by for a cigarette and to hear a story He always told the tale of one eyed molly She lost her eye In a fight with a dog The moral of the story was Never trust something Just because it may look harmless, Even act harmless But this day he told me another tale The one of old Lumberjack Dale* He was large like an ogre Chopped too many trees to know of Was stupid according to my uncle This gave me quite a chuckle He left off, on a normal morning Hiked up the mountain To where the clear dirt’s mourning Held his axe and began to swing The trees didn't have a prayer He thought he was king One fell down He yelled "TIMBER" Another smacked the ground He Yelled "TIMBER" Then another and Another Birds were scattering Squirrels were flying The sounds were of a madman grunting through fire "TIMBER" The fifth hit the ground The lumberjack ogre Had to sit down He swung one too many times, on this here day The mountain swung back with a black bear, ok? Protecting her cubs she wrestled the big man Teeth in his arm and his axe in his hand He squinted his eyes and flung the weapon Missing the giant bear standing about 6' 11" The mountain whispered to the lumberjack "Leave and never come back" He had ****** his pants and ran for the shack "TIMBER" The old black bear followed Protecting her land And the ones she adored
0
Jan 5, 2015
Jan 5, 2015 at 9:13 AM UTC
Lumberjack Dale
Sung to the tune of The Lumberjack Song by Monty Python. Back-up Mounties optional. I never wanted to be Sandra Dee! I... I wanted to be... A LESBIAN! (piano vamp) Leaping from bush to bush! As they float down the mighty rivers of Finger and Thumbia! With my best girl by my side! The Blond! The Brunette! The Giant Snookie! The Natural Red! The Little Spinning Skinnamarink! We'd sing! Sing! Sing! Oh, I'm a lesbian, and I'm okay, I like to broadcast that I'm gay. Chorus: She's a lesbian, and she's okay, She likes to broadcast that she's gay. I see straight girls, they're not like me, But I think that can change. If they'd just let me kiss them. Their lives I'd re-arrange. Mounties: She sees straight girls, they're not like her, But she thinks that can change. If they'd just let her kiss them. Their lives she'd re-arrange. Chorus: She's a lesbian, and she's okay, She likes to broadcast that she's gay. I cut down guys, I wish and hope, That others would join in. I wish straight women would think, that *** with men was sin. Mounties: She cuts down guys, she wishes and hopes, That others would join in. She wishes straight women would think, that *** with men was sin. Chorus: She's a lesbian, and she's okay, She likes to broadcast that she's gay. Oh I'm a lesbian and I'm OKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK K!
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May 1, 2014
May 1, 2014 at 10:07 PM UTC
The Lesbian Song
The veins in my heart, rooted down to my stomach, and from these roots began to grow a tree, and on its branches caterpillars did roam right there in my stomach, they made their home. yet I was alone. Enter the lumberjack. The caterpillars cocooned, ready to begin the transformation from girl to woman, oh, the sensation! Time ticked on, the lumberjack and I, with that little spark in our eye, from the tree, grew a garden, into woods our love resounding above the forest canopy the feral instincts, the cinders, the shade until finally the Sun no longer shone so the wall of qualms had to go, in the form of trees, one by one. chopped. Yet. the wildfires had sparked and the cocoons were now butterflies and the forest we grew together was ablaze what he didn't chop, my cinders singed, ash by ash life was ceasing to be, and then from the woods, were we forced to flee. and the butterflies flew free the blossoms, the trees, burned but the butterflies flew free, in my stomach, they are free so now a bit of our dead forest lives in me.
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Feb 5, 2015
Feb 5, 2015 at 8:58 PM UTC
be wary of the caterpillars
She walks the woods Stays the night Everyday at her Grandma's house He knows the path Walks with her Silently he stalks her "It's not me, it's the wolf" She swears to her Granma's ghost "He dug my skin up for treasures" Found the bones of a pretty young girl Hiding behind her bright blonde curls Shed her skin on the side of the road Picked up her coat and put on a show "I will go to Grandma's home And eat her heart out like a wounded soul" She uses the last of her dying breath To call out to the lumberjack "He went all the way to my Grandma's cottage He wears a disguise, my great red cape and hoody Don't Mistake him for another hooligan He's the big bad wolf and he'd eat you in an instant"
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Nov 20, 2014
Nov 20, 2014 at 5:17 PM UTC
Little Red Riding Hood
Better to be a live dog than a dead lion. Better to be a rollin' log than a lumberjack cryin'. Better to be a drunkin' fool than a junkie's spoon. Better to be a happy camper than a hurtin' unit. Better to be a fresh pamper than full of ****
0
Jun 16, 2012
Jun 16, 2012 at 9:09 AM UTC
Live Dog
Firm hands Visage, chiselled by gods I pray upon the temple Intertwined fingers Sinful embrace I have longed a touch for Mars So far, yet he saw the wood, The hill, The Temple. The Mars enraged! Raging howl of a lone canine Digging of what the burried desire has for him Digging, digging Dig! The Lumberjack fervently saws the hills O God! Visage with a burning desire! Not a tune of emotion compares to what this broken vision has seen Not a tune of reality passes him. Unconcious by the dew, Concious by the sun Ending the sin of a forbidden bind.
0
Jun 18, 2017
Jun 18, 2017 at 1:38 AM UTC
The Lumberjack
Better to be a live dog than a dead lion. Better to be a rollin' log than a lumberjack cryin'. Better to be a drunken fool than a junkie's spoon. Better to be a happy camper than a hurtin' unit. Better to be a fresh pamper than full of **** ©2000
0
Nov 15, 2013
Nov 15, 2013 at 8:20 AM UTC
Live Dog
Her Father's old wool jacket, from Johnson Mills, in creamy white, dark forest green, golden amber, in a lovely patchwork, A soft dark winter tuke on her head, that dark green in the background, with rusty speckles on her cheeks, Wet snow falls silent, the sky is a crisp Winter blue, the air is cold and clear, & intoxicatingly clean, As she breathes life in and out, then, looking down at her black Sorel boots and her worn black denim jeans, a nice old holey wool sweater, and a maul, A **** lumberjack? Maybe... Dressed to hack the wood, the plumber thinks so, he stops by, a friend of hers, sorta, Huh? Not invited, but no one is around here, we all do it, so he helps too, Hey I'll make lunch, harmless flirting, I suppose, Because, wood warms you 3 times they say, Once to chop it, two to stack it RIGHT, three to bring it in & burn it, But if you count the starting of the, cantankerous chainsaw & the guy, helping you, And you hafta arrange & rearrange, everything, cleaning the flue and chimney, I'd say a few more than that, & don't ferget to pay the man, the cantankerous one, Yeah he got lunch too, and about them ashes, could be pretty hot, take 'em out regular, that stove cranking too, OUCH, She ends up gets burned, a few times each year, Taday, she's on step too, as she picks up the heavy maul, not to heavy for this gal, all the way back, watch yourself, As a neighbor winches, a woman chopping wood? Yup. That's right, a way of life, for her, always has been, poised and ready, swing and smack, if you hit it right, you hear a crack, Just like a baseball bat, hitting a homer, Big pieces, are made more manageable, when you don't try to control the force, when you let the sharpened maul, Do all the work, for you. Cherie Nolan © 2016
0
Nov 20, 2016
Nov 20, 2016 at 1:40 PM UTC
It Warms You 3 Times They Say
Her Father's old wool jacket, from Johnson Mills, in creamy white, dark forest green, golden amber, in a lovely patchwork, A soft dark winter tuke on her head, that dark green in the background, with rusty speckles on her cheeks, Wet snow falls silent, the sky is a crisp Winter blue, the air is cold and clear, & intoxicatingly clean, As she breathes life in and out, then, looking down at her black Sorel boots and her worn black denim jeans, a nice old holey wool sweater, and a maul, A **** lumberjack? Maybe... Dressed to hack the wood, the plumber thinks so, he stops by, a friend of hers, sorta, Huh? Not invited, but no one is around here, we all do it, so he helps too, Hey I'll make lunch, harmless flirting, I suppose, Because, wood warms you 3 times they say, Once to chop it, two to stack it RIGHT, three to bring it in & burn it, But if you count the starting of the, cantankerous chainsaw & the guy, helping you, And you hafta arrange & rearrange, everything, cleaning the flue and chimney, I'd say a few more than that, & don't ferget to pay the man, the cantankerous one, Yeah he got lunch too, and about them ashes, could be pretty hot, take 'em out regular, that stove cranking too, OUCH, She ends up gets burned, a few times each year, Taday, she's on step too, as she picks up the heavy maul, not to heavy for this gal, all the way back, watch yourself, As a neighbor winches, a woman chopping wood? Yup. That's right, a way of life, for her, always has been, poised and ready, swing and smack, if you hit it right, you hear a crack, Just like a baseball bat, hitting a homer, Big pieces, are made more manageable, when you don't try to control the force, when you let the sharpened maul, Do all the work, for you. Cherie Nolan © 2016
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81
They squirm inside their clothes tweed, chiffon tiered skirts, and bows of their grandmothers’ sepia, halcyon days with lumberjack flannel and Kerouac quotes, but it’s more a matter of age than size, these charging, listless, candid creatures with hairstyles that can only be described as gravity readily defied and self-cut, frequently dyed to shades that swing between black coffee and New York poetry deep imagism and social realism against the backdrop of American Apparel ads on scratched up Macs. They slouch up and down trafficked Newbury, dropping names like Morrissey and Bukowski pausing now and then to pick up on the ennui of twenty-three, and how they will one day live la vie Dharhimian, running on American Spirits, James Dean, Truffaut chic, a monthly check from their parents, an apathetic sneer at holding anything too dearly and how they hate that word—hip-ster.
0
Dec 30, 2012
Dec 30, 2012 at 6:44 PM UTC
Hipster Girls on Newbury
How do I get a carving out of a tree? The smug shape of your G+E outlines with a stupid, misshaped heart etched into the evergreen. You ruined my favorite tree with five words. A sentence I knew you would inevitably say at some point of our lives together. I really wanted to doubt myself for once, and be proved wrong in the right way. But you just had to keep me incorrect. I call the local lumberjack and ask him, "Cut down the tree as soon as possible." I think that's how you get a carving out of a tree.
0
Nov 19, 2015
Nov 19, 2015 at 10:42 PM UTC
Ad: Tree Cutter Wanted
after witty humour, which spawned slapstick... slapstick can only spawn the last of the known humours... the offensive type, the 'get me out of this straithjacket of everything's fine apathy,' the ugly humour... rude humour... i take oaths humour... i rather write a swear word to oil up than degrade myself with thesaurus usage humour. why is poetry such a ***** of coding daily activity... who needs poetry if the everyday is intact? atheism didn’t **** god... it merely killed the logic of myth.... atheism is far worse than mythology... it just regurgitates facts to make you submit to them without the necessary philosophical awe of finding them interesting... poetry isn’t dead... it’s a ***** which is worse than death where i come from... there’s ezra with his fountain comparison: ‘i ****** in it... and put pigmenting chlorine in it - you **** in it... streaks of blue... i think that’s called cubism in france.’ did i say alcoholism was engineered by the nazis for the bomb sarcasm? cheap humour you say... ah well slapstick was invented after sarcasam... i heard the new best anti-ageing cream was butter rather than l’oreal - there are too many stages in the differences of women, i quite like the summer spring autumn winter thing going... it’s like this thing that’s happening right now... christian nations censor words... like **** cultish **** of the brothel... and islamic nations invoke words... like kefir (sour milk, not quite youghurt), dawah... adhan salat abraham... one party censors words for excess ***** saying: ‘we don’t like swear words in accomplished spelling, we like dyslexia and **** teen **** graphic...’ sounds about right... the other party says: ‘we hate censoring ***** words, that’s doubly censoring, censor ***** words get more dirt out of it... we invoke the power of arabic to teach koran latin for the knobs!’ problem sorted... we’re all power brokers of spelling / punctuation / arithmetic - that’s what i don’t get, the ratio of the two languages... all you have in the digits A to Z is spelling and punctuation... but what you have in the digits ZERO to NINE is so much more... is grammar a castle that’s keeping certain functions out? in mathematics you have +, x, obelisk, -, square root, etc. but in linguistics you have this permament reminder: SPELL RIGHT FROM WRONG AND RITE FROM THONG. well... ****** me timbers... i think i just spotted a lumberjack chequers tweed jacket.
0
Nov 24, 2015
Nov 24, 2015 at 8:49 PM UTC
a lumberjack chequers tweed jacket
after witty humour, which spawned slapstick... slapstick can only spawn the last of the known humours... the offensive type, the 'get me out of this straithjacket of everything's fine apathy,' the ugly humour... rude humour... i take oaths humour... i rather write a swear word to oil up than degrade myself with thesaurus usage humour. why is poetry such a ***** of coding daily activity... who needs poetry if the everyday is intact? atheism didn’t **** god... it merely killed the logic of myth.... atheism is far worse than mythology... it just regurgitates facts to make you submit to them without the necessary philosophical awe of finding them interesting... poetry isn’t dead... it’s a ***** which is worse than death where i come from... there’s ezra with his fountain comparison: ‘i ****** in it... and put pigmenting chlorine in it - you **** in it... streaks of blue... i think that’s called cubism in france.’ did i say alcoholism was engineered by the nazis for the bomb sarcasm? cheap humour you say... ah well slapstick was invented after sarcasam... i heard the new best anti-ageing cream was butter rather than l’oreal - there are too many stages in the differences of women, i quite like the summer spring autumn winter thing going... it’s like this thing that’s happening right now... christian nations censor words... like **** cultish **** of the brothel... and islamic nations invoke words... like kefir (sour milk, not quite youghurt), dawah... adhan salat abraham... one party censors words for excess ***** saying: ‘we don’t like swear words in accomplished spelling, we like dyslexia and **** teen **** graphic...’ sounds about right... the other party says: ‘we hate censoring ***** words, that’s doubly censoring, censor ***** words get more dirt out of it... we invoke the power of arabic to teach koran latin for the knobs!’ problem sorted... we’re all power brokers of spelling / punctuation / arithmetic - that’s what i don’t get, the ratio of the two languages... all you have in the digits A to Z is spelling and punctuation... but what you have in the digits ZERO to NINE is so much more... is grammar a castle that’s keeping certain functions out? in mathematics you have +, x, obelisk, -, square root, etc. but in linguistics you have this permament reminder: SPELL RIGHT FROM WRONG AND RITE FROM THONG. well... ****** me timbers... i think i just spotted a lumberjack chequers tweed jacket.
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50
It's like sparring with a lumberjack a tell tale sign you're lost A party trick , a baseball bat and loving what you've got a sparrow rests- an open chest a gunshot wound for hire tempted to forget that love will force you through the fire thirty nine and feeling fine and hating what you have kisses in the moonlight and ignoring how it stabs open eyes of baby blue have been lying all this time dreaming dreams sustained by you it still feels like a crime. Headlights hollow open vast and scream a shallow tune baby birds they fly too fast and are taken by the moon. Pacing blankets made of smiles and fairies in her hair name tags and red ceiling tiles dying, trying not to stare. She's beautiful as sunshine and sweet as summer heat and standing by the roadside she sells her rotten meat. There's plenty love in all the world for sirens of her kind and your body's steady pull of heat tempts her to leave us all behind we're hanging from a telephone pole at the end of steady stream and seeing glass is on the floor cutting up our dreams This plane is falling into bits for the rich ones to enjoy i wonder when they'll figure out that earth is not a toy. porky's in the dining hall playing Rhapsody and Blue on a washboard and a bathroom stall I'm entering on cue. You can scream and yell and call me names Curse words aren't that bad My life is one big mess of loud you're not supposed to make me mad.
0
Jul 13, 2011
Jul 13, 2011 at 9:23 AM UTC
Playful Banter
What is this? A jacket But something so simple can mean so much It can hold me together when i get mad Make someone look like a lumberjack Though how could I rely on a lumberjack? A jacket? I can’t I know this None the less They mean so much to me The tough exteriors Soft insides All in all I believe a lumberjack saved me today
0
Oct 22, 2014
Oct 22, 2014 at 11:10 PM UTC
Lumberjack
I am the Lumberjack, strong and sway, Out and about to work a manly day. "Will you swing your mighty ax?" less asked, more sung, And I said "Boy, my axe already been swung". "Oh sweet Jesus, where are we hiding the body?!" "I'll make it into a cabin, that's a Lumberjack's hobby" It takes skill and ingenuity to rank with Lumberjacks, "Well good for you, that's thinking with your ax."
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Oct 30, 2014
Oct 30, 2014 at 11:02 PM UTC
The Tree-Slayer
Taken by my hand, warped and aged with time, rings and rings of life, ingrained beneath my skin, you hold me with ease, and, I unravel with gravity, falling apart. I bend and lean with the wind, a slight breeze from you, is enough to shake me from the ground, to the sky, and everything is naked, and everything is the truth, and i stand here, before you, as you hold an axe in your hands. Ready to fell me, and take me apart. My roots are old, my heart is protected with years of warped timber, my heart is protected as peach pit, my heart is protected with poison ivy. Yet in the spring i blossom, In the summer i shine bright as the very sun, And in the autumn i renew myself, ready to ride the winter's harsh code. You take me within your grasp, I am a cold wind, I am a summers breeze; I am the very essence of life within you, within me. As you come to me, and take me, And take me apart, I am ready to go, I am ready to be burnt by the fire, and become the earth again. So come at me, but be warned I stand tall, and built strong, but beneath the outer layers, I am truly a phenomenal piece of work, given from the universe, to you. Bring your axe, Bring your rough hands, Bring your words. I am rejuvenated by you.
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Nov 1, 2013
Nov 1, 2013 at 5:38 PM UTC
The lumberjack and I.
A misplaced Oxford Comma Lead to perilous trauma She drifted into an Oggsford Coma Then turned into an awful aroma The Ceremony held in 1980 Resurrected in 1 A.D In the lumbering town of Hudson's Bay Majorie chose to stay Never feeling so free She sat within a tree Enjoying all she could see The girl decided never to flee Established in 1995 This dream came Alive A tree home called heaven Would stand until 1997 Slim used to be a Jackline Skinner Lumberjack was more of a winner Quickly forgot all about Walden Pond Long before a new light dawned "The wind that blows Is all that anybody knows" Even goes for pros Or vacant minded 'hoes' Just patiently listen to those Who know where a **** goes Don't make needless foes Leave that for all the 'pros' Slim stood uttering horrible slurs At the request of a woman in expensive furs Majorie stood on bended knee Pleading for them to leave her tree As she reached the bottom of the ladder Silence was breached by a sudden clatter All the rats began to scatter Knowing exactly what was the matter The lumberjack had missed his mark Added slightly too much ark Caused the Oak to prematurely tumble And his body to instantly crumble
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May 25, 2013
May 25, 2013 at 3:08 AM UTC
Oggsford Coma
Hey, I'm not a lumberjack, or a fur trader there's only one pelt I'm interested in.... I don't live in an igloo or eat blubber, or own a dogsled Global warming has taken all the snow away.... and I don't know Jimmy, Sally or Suzy from Canada, i do know Partel, Kareem, Xi Chein and Steve and they're really really nice. I have a Prime Minister who is ******** not a president. I speak English and a little French, not American though we like to mock southern accents... And I pronounce it 'aboot, not about... I can proudly sew my country's flag on my backpack along with with motorhead and misfits patches... I believe in peace keeping, not policing unless you count the G20... diversity, not assimilation, unless it's the borg... and that the ****** is a truly proud and noble animal and a bald one is truely a wonder to behold... A toque is a hat that douchbags wear all year round, a chesterfield is a couch that my dunken friends sleep on, and it is pronounced 'zed' not 'zee', 'zed' unless its Zebra because Zedbra sounds stupid!!! Canada is the second largest landmass that can be pilfered by multinational conglomerates! The first nation of hockey! and the best part of North America... except vegas! My name is Josh!! And I am Canadian!!! EH?
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Jan 22, 2014
Jan 22, 2014 at 2:18 PM UTC
I AM CANADIAN
The scene was chaos almost like black friday at El Wallmarto. people being pushed around by gringo's who didnt even own a pair of spandex tights. Or even know the glory of winning a no holds barred naked lumberjack with a ***** splintter match. The people needed a hero. they screamed for the legends return please poppi save us from the ordinary. My amigo's were persecuted and i sat helpless traped across the boader do to a bogus lack of green card. I must have left it in my other tights. but once again like a old man on crystal **** and ****** the champion has returned to claim his crown. And to shake his groove thing all over Hello once again. With the strength of a small well shaved bear. And the eye's of a low flying seagull I shall drop some splatters of wisdom apon my fellow amigos. Chips and salsa for everyone . no longer heartbroken from my hellcat seniorita Drew yes her bite marks i wear proudly in places I need to tan. Let the little gringos sing like pretty little birdies and senoiritas run through the fields like in thoose not so fresh comercials. Go tell amigos everywhere pour the cervesa For El ******** Rides again.
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Jan 18, 2011
Jan 18, 2011 at 6:57 PM UTC
******** Rides Again
surrounding us: a billion stars in a time when a trip to mars is like walking around the block and captain kirk and mister spock are arguing about the prime directive. we’re beaming to a planet’s surface. now listen: i know about inverse tachyon beams i know about coded klingon screams i know about going to warp factor eight i know about redshirts' survival rate. (no. chance.) i’m beaming down with the main crew to the surface of minerva II we've got a malfunctioning interstellar transceiver which is distressing-- dysgraphing? dismantling… …i don't know. scotty said it was defective. so we’re on this planet, standing on one side of a thick forest packed with monster janeks, starfleet says we need to fix this thing yesterday, and we’re in a panic— and **** it, mccoy is a doctor, not a lumberjack, and kirk says we should just burn through the middle with phasers, and spock says we must preserve respect for all life forms no matter the situation. now please remember kirk’s the captain. that means he runs this show but kirk always listens to spock, so we spend two days walking through the forest. surrounding us: a billion trees in a place where a strange disease is rare as feathers in a flock and captain kirk and mister spock are arguing about the prime directive. halfway through this dark-lit trip things go wrong (obviously) and an alien with shellac for skin captures the captain. said alien grabs a vine, ascends into the canopy of the trees, and for one glorious moment i believe kirk’s the dead guy in this episode, not me! but spock, in his calm and logical vulcan voice, orders us to exercise any necessary force to recover the captain. translation: **** EVERYTHING. JUST GET KIRK BACK. we reach the janek village. being a good redshirt, i rush in, phaser blasting, ready to complete the heroic rescue of our captain— and get killed instantly. as i was dying, i heard the sound of thousands of janeks dying beside me saw spock help kirk off the ground and the last words I heard were theirs: “captain, are you in need of immediate medical attention?” “nah, spock, i’m fine—” “mr. scott. the captain is hurt. beam us aboard immediately.” one’s arm over the other’s shoulders, they vanished. surrounding them: a billion stars in a time when a trip to mars is like walking around the block and captain kirk and mister spock are arguing about the prime directive— but the prime directive was never the real objective.
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Dec 4, 2013
Dec 4, 2013 at 10:30 PM UTC
a redshirt's perspective on the prime directive
surrounding us: a billion stars in a time when a trip to mars is like walking around the block and captain kirk and mister spock are arguing about the prime directive. we’re beaming to a planet’s surface. now listen: i know about inverse tachyon beams i know about coded klingon screams i know about going to warp factor eight i know about redshirts' survival rate. (no. chance.) i’m beaming down with the main crew to the surface of minerva II we've got a malfunctioning interstellar transceiver which is distressing-- dysgraphing? dismantling… …i don't know. scotty said it was defective. so we’re on this planet, standing on one side of a thick forest packed with monster janeks, starfleet says we need to fix this thing yesterday, and we’re in a panic— and **** it, mccoy is a doctor, not a lumberjack, and kirk says we should just burn through the middle with phasers, and spock says we must preserve respect for all life forms no matter the situation. now please remember kirk’s the captain. that means he runs this show but kirk always listens to spock, so we spend two days walking through the forest. surrounding us: a billion trees in a place where a strange disease is rare as feathers in a flock and captain kirk and mister spock are arguing about the prime directive. halfway through this dark-lit trip things go wrong (obviously) and an alien with shellac for skin captures the captain. said alien grabs a vine, ascends into the canopy of the trees, and for one glorious moment i believe kirk’s the dead guy in this episode, not me! but spock, in his calm and logical vulcan voice, orders us to exercise any necessary force to recover the captain. translation: **** EVERYTHING. JUST GET KIRK BACK. we reach the janek village. being a good redshirt, i rush in, phaser blasting, ready to complete the heroic rescue of our captain— and get killed instantly. as i was dying, i heard the sound of thousands of janeks dying beside me saw spock help kirk off the ground and the last words I heard were theirs: “captain, are you in need of immediate medical attention?” “nah, spock, i’m fine—” “mr. scott. the captain is hurt. beam us aboard immediately.” one’s arm over the other’s shoulders, they vanished. surrounding them: a billion stars in a time when a trip to mars is like walking around the block and captain kirk and mister spock are arguing about the prime directive— but the prime directive was never the real objective.
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56
Home again. I hold the door, and sigh. Holding my axe in one hand, Orange, white, and red plaid shirt. Chin covered in stubble. A warm fire inside. My sweetheart reading by the hearth. A glance up. Her light blue eyes, so inviting. Her smile. I enter. And rest.
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Oct 9, 2013
Oct 9, 2013 at 1:24 AM UTC
"Are You A Lumberjack?" "No, I wish."
Went to visit grandparents, decided I never want to be old I have trouble keeping up as it is: Technology is too fast paced Phones are too small (and who needs one when they’re seven?) Movies have too many explosions All my music is from at least twenty years ago While I’m planning my eternal youth I forget I take up space I feel four hard smacks on the rear Apparently I was blocking an elderly woman’s wheels “Sorry for the love tap, you were in the way” I wasn’t sure how to feel A bit violated perhaps It might have been, well, kind of nice If she didn’t predate Christ For lunch we sat with a kind couple Marjorie and Phil She wore all brown, with a necklace of whittled wooden giraffes He was dressed like a lumberjack, pants mid-torso, flood-ready We talked about a few things… Mahler symphonies, Latin, obscure mountain villages Both of them seemed perfectly content You know, old age doesn’t seem so bad As long as you have someone to share it with
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Jan 17, 2011
Jan 17, 2011 at 7:50 AM UTC
62. Old 1/17/11
Alright all you pigeon chests Came the sound of thunder from the open door As Big Bad Bart replaced the space Giant mountain man of lore Making his way into the bar Sweeping Nancy boys out of his way Stepping up to the the jukebox Kicking it till some good ole country boy music played This mountain man has made it his goal To grab hold and unsissify Any Wimpy Wally's That happen to catch his manly eye He started off his conquest Out in the great North wood First stop The Red Eye Back Door Saloon Need I explain the name to you He went in with his moral barrels a blazing But there wasn't much he could do Village people the only band on the jukebox Y.M.C.A. being the only tune He didn't let that little nitch stop him Or slow him down by any means Giving America back to the menly men And not the mousey men with their girly dreams Till the day that Bart locked eyes with Stanly In that San Francisco flower bar Those two haven't left each others side Going through life now arm and arm They spend their time skipping through fields of pansies Giggling freely hand in hand The way Bart now feels this was meant to be Mia Mono, Man to Man Bart's lumberjack buddies can't believe it And don't know what to think of their friend Although they all secretly admit He does look good in those Hot Pink Hot Pants
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Jun 12, 2013
Jun 12, 2013 at 7:21 AM UTC
Big Bad Bart (Mountain Man)
Planet earth Was my place of birth I need worth? Money fortune and fame Man i couldnt picture this Without makin' a name I wanted to be the black Picasso With the picture perfect flow So ya know The microphone fiend Aint went no where And All my spectators n haters Had to stop n stare Listenin' to the bass thumpin' Music n mic is so loud Movin' the crowd With my aesthetic poetry Ricochetin' minds with my lyrical Content Once the trigger hits the bars get More ruthless Strikin' furious makin' emcees toothless Leave em with a strong lisp Check the total Eclipse Its temporary darkness mark this Day and age im the new jack So im turnin' the page Backward bringin' real hip hop back Yo! ,im finna cut deep as a lumberjack And yea im black So get ready to attack Butll be back For more ******** delivery NONE could shake thee Original master of the craft Send the army n still they couldnt penetrate me The black rambo of the industry I had to take and make My own moves show to you n prove To ya that im the best at this Two decades later n hip hops gone But now im resurrected The flow is re-connected Back to nineteen eighty six Now watch me rough up the mix Dont look any further this is a stick up Or hold up just fold up Cuz ya at a dead end Dont pretend that you couldn't bend Your way out of a jam session Go to the **** for a quick blessin' ya stressin' Got ya nerves shook from my verbs Ya mind couldnt take it So death couldnt fake it now i know as hit up ya funeral Payin' my dues to the fallen ones That tried to intervene between The jewelry the cars and my life complex scene Enticin' green Cuz of the way i drop them fools Turnin' mule On the mic Cuz im paid in fullllllllllllllll!!!!!
0
Jul 28, 2015
Jul 28, 2015 at 7:18 PM UTC
Paid in Full
Planet earth Was my place of birth I need worth? Money fortune and fame Man i couldnt picture this Without makin' a name I wanted to be the black Picasso With the picture perfect flow So ya know The microphone fiend Aint went no where And All my spectators n haters Had to stop n stare Listenin' to the bass thumpin' Music n mic is so loud Movin' the crowd With my aesthetic poetry Ricochetin' minds with my lyrical Content Once the trigger hits the bars get More ruthless Strikin' furious makin' emcees toothless Leave em with a strong lisp Check the total Eclipse Its temporary darkness mark this Day and age im the new jack So im turnin' the page Backward bringin' real hip hop back Yo! ,im finna cut deep as a lumberjack And yea im black So get ready to attack Butll be back For more ******** delivery NONE could shake thee Original master of the craft Send the army n still they couldnt penetrate me The black rambo of the industry I had to take and make My own moves show to you n prove To ya that im the best at this Two decades later n hip hops gone But now im resurrected The flow is re-connected Back to nineteen eighty six Now watch me rough up the mix Dont look any further this is a stick up Or hold up just fold up Cuz ya at a dead end Dont pretend that you couldn't bend Your way out of a jam session Go to the **** for a quick blessin' ya stressin' Got ya nerves shook from my verbs Ya mind couldnt take it So death couldnt fake it now i know as hit up ya funeral Payin' my dues to the fallen ones That tried to intervene between The jewelry the cars and my life complex scene Enticin' green Cuz of the way i drop them fools Turnin' mule On the mic Cuz im paid in fullllllllllllllll!!!!!
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