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"granddad" poems
It's been nine years now. Nine years since the angels took you away. Nine years since I stood at the home, looking at your peaceful face; eyes closed, a ghost of a smile gracing your lips. It doesn't seem that long. It seems like yesterday you were calling me your little princess; I'm still that little girl at heart. The one who believed she would grow up to be a beautiful elegant contessa. I don't have many memories of the times we shared as I was only young when you passed. In fact, sometimes I struggle to picture your gorgeous, smiling face telling me stories of your past of advice for when I grew into an elegant older woman just like you were then. I was only 6... 6 years old and I had to go through the pain and heartache of having my nan cruelly taken away from me. I'll be 16 next year. I'll be having my prom next year. I will be leaving year 11, getting my GCSE results and starting A-levels next year. So much has happened in these 9 short, short years. There is so much more to come and you won't be here to share it with me. My graduation from university, my first career move, my marriage, my children... Your great-grandchildren. You won't be here for the good times, the bad...The happy and the sad... There are certain qualities about you that I will always remember... Being made banana sandwiches every time we went round to your house! Having a Sunday roast with you and Granddad every single week! Your 60th birthday (I knocked Zack down and felt so chuffed!) The last birthday you ever spent with me... You made my birthday cake that year... If I remember correctly, it was a princess castle with all the Disney princesses stood around it! You told me I deserved a cake because I was a beautiful princess also. I know you will be looking down on me and the family just to make sure we are alright! I just hope it's a smile on your face and not a frown! I hope I have made you proud nan... I really do. I hope you Rest In Peace nan and I will never forget you. Forever in our hearts and minds. 15/06/2004... We love you nan and always will. <3
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Aug 2, 2013
Aug 2, 2013 at 6:56 PM UTC
Nan...
It's been nine years now. Nine years since the angels took you away. Nine years since I stood at the home, looking at your peaceful face; eyes closed, a ghost of a smile gracing your lips. It doesn't seem that long. It seems like yesterday you were calling me your little princess; I'm still that little girl at heart. The one who believed she would grow up to be a beautiful elegant contessa. I don't have many memories of the times we shared as I was only young when you passed. In fact, sometimes I struggle to picture your gorgeous, smiling face telling me stories of your past of advice for when I grew into an elegant older woman just like you were then. I was only 6... 6 years old and I had to go through the pain and heartache of having my nan cruelly taken away from me. I'll be 16 next year. I'll be having my prom next year. I will be leaving year 11, getting my GCSE results and starting A-levels next year. So much has happened in these 9 short, short years. There is so much more to come and you won't be here to share it with me. My graduation from university, my first career move, my marriage, my children... Your great-grandchildren. You won't be here for the good times, the bad...The happy and the sad... There are certain qualities about you that I will always remember... Being made banana sandwiches every time we went round to your house! Having a Sunday roast with you and Granddad every single week! Your 60th birthday (I knocked Zack down and felt so chuffed!) The last birthday you ever spent with me... You made my birthday cake that year... If I remember correctly, it was a princess castle with all the Disney princesses stood around it! You told me I deserved a cake because I was a beautiful princess also. I know you will be looking down on me and the family just to make sure we are alright! I just hope it's a smile on your face and not a frown! I hope I have made you proud nan... I really do. I hope you Rest In Peace nan and I will never forget you. Forever in our hearts and minds. 15/06/2004... We love you nan and always will. <3
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4
It was only the other day you fell asleep in your old chair The one that was in your front room decades ago You didn't see Andy Murray lose but you didn't care You’d eaten well and heavy eyed you dozed I’m sorry but when I lost the house it had to go I know throwing it out was a bit wrong But if chairs go to heaven though At least you’ll have something there to sit on I wish I’d never told you off for smoking by the pump You looked so sad that I’d made you feel a fool But imagine how you would have made those people jump As they were all engulfed by a massive fireball Enjoy your new lungs and try keeping them clean for a few hours Enjoy your time with Granddad it’s been thirty years too long Enjoy strolling through those heavenly gardens with all your favourite flowers But in heaven, please don’t bag cuttings; I’m sure up there it’s wrong!
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Apr 9, 2013
Apr 9, 2013 at 11:08 AM UTC
Enjoy the Trip Nan!
To the man who made me who I am Being with you was like learning without a textbook I just watched and copied and made it my own From gardening to maths You made me my own genius I didn't have to speak for you to know what was wrong You didn't judge me for the silly things I said Or how I never learnt at school You taught me to teach my self You were my Mr Miyagi With less riddles more jokes I learnt that laughter can flood rooms like tidal waves And we were leaves to float in it And now you're gone I wont mourn You would tell me to stop crying and cut my hair I will use laughter to put a smile on raggedy dolls And the stories to keep the dark days down Thank you for being the Godfather of giggles Making Sunday dinners not the day to fear Mondays Having gardening not be a chore but a way to think Rest well Granddad.
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May 13, 2015
May 13, 2015 at 8:05 PM UTC
Godfather Of Giggles
I'm no good in a kitchen but, I can cook stuff all the same Around here, say "the recipe" and most folks know my name It hasn't changed in fifty years, and folks still drink it up I've been making it with my granddad since I was just a pup I"ve been racing cars through out these woods since before most learn to drive I've been chased by cops and revenuers, I surprised I'm still alive The funny thing, they know the route, and I always make the border Because if they ever caught me, I would just cancel their order Magic comes from our hard toil Once it travels through the coil We cook it slow on a low boil It's cooked according to old Hoyle It's magic in a glass And it'll put you on your *** In all the years that we've been cooking we've only moved on twice Not because the cops found us, but because of all the mice Grandpappy started cooking when the jobs round here dried up And me, I've been his helper since I was just a pup Everyone's on credit, we all live on iou's There's still no jobs around here, there just isn't no good news But, if folks round here need healing, we've got magic in a jug Our granddads old elixir is a moonshine mountain hug Magic comes from our hard toil Once it travels through the coil We cook it slow on a low boil It's cooked according to old Hoyle It's magic in a glass And it'll put you on your ***
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Sep 8, 2013
Sep 8, 2013 at 2:28 PM UTC
Grandads Elixir
I'm not sure how old he is, my step-step-granddad, but that's the advice he gives that fixes itself on my psyche. Focus. The act is the goal. It's the thought of having been and becoming whole. Focus. Each event is like a pebble in a landslide. I take it in stride. Focus. I am everywhere and there is no center, no home base, no dock on this river. I'm caught in current. Stay calm. This is perfect. Each twist in the flow, every rock of the boat, every splash in the face, my being gives chase to  possibilities in consistent inconsistencies, sacred, eternal, geometries. Do our bodies disperse like the leaves that traverse from limb to ground, spiraling down? Focus. Where are your shoes? We're running late, and there's no time for another drink. We're out of milk? Look at my sink. It's piled high and I can't think with you  making all that ********* noise. What time is it? I forgot to call... that bill is due tacked on the wall. I wonder if we'll talk again. There's spam where your email should have been. All this time I thought that we were friends. I can't sleep. I'm up too late and I can't sate this need to see what I can make of missed phone calls and mystery texts. That write up? No, I haven't seen that yet. But don't forget, I told you, "I can handle it." Remember? Double. Oh. Seven. Wait. Focus. Breathe in. I'm calm. That's resurrection. Breathe out. I'm smiling. That's reconnection.
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Nov 24, 2014
Nov 24, 2014 at 10:08 PM UTC
Focus
When Rome fell down, Don Newton with his flashing blade Took over. He marched the corridors of Table Tennis power For more than fifty years. And graced a multitude of committees with his Presence. As Mister NALGO, Don constructed A glorious empire Of countless teams At many a venue: Down Pasture Street, In Weelsby, Yarra, Knoll, Electric Club, Saint James... To name a few. Amassing titles and cups From every division Of the Grimsby League: A roll of honour too long to recall, Now stretching to the horizon. No fancy sponge, reversed rubber, Or long-pimples for our Don. Give him a plain old Barna bat, Devoid of sponge, short-pimples out, To give that ball a mighty clout. The simple things in life Were all he wished: A pint of mild, Or game of chess, Would always go down well. This table tennis granddad knows the score, And takes his leisure now, Contented as The sun goes down. Paul Butters
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Feb 13, 2015
Feb 13, 2015 at 3:03 PM UTC
Don Newton
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ She had her own signature scent, A lasting aroma, that lingers in every corner of her home As the strong winds picked up the scent, and move it quite a distance. She carefully prepare the mixture from the earth Cuss ,kuss grass, Jasmine, rose buds and roots, Before she prepare the mixtures with that special touch Like a fine wine from the winery, “One more drop of Rosemary oil, she would say This would make the scent last for eternity, Old Granddad he would make silly jokes, His word usages, madam chemist, a witch with a spoon, But in the end, she would always made a special potion for him We would carefully select the flaky mahogany woods shaving, with combinations of fresh vanilla leaves with extracting oil with oils Those homemade perfumes from flowers had lots of potential. Granddad hand craft the wooded bottle stoppers with his chisel, It was a joy to watch, the old Irish typhoon working and smoking his pipe Old Alan baffler was Nana nickname for him She would scold and speak harshly to us for touching the those colorful luring bottles “Don’t open those bottles, you malicious children Else a witch would appear: She would often say, For me, my nana was an old chemist, with old decade’s wooden sticks. Preparing the mixtures like a fine wine, I am forever grateful for those memories I should have follow in her footsteps, Her secret potions, her gift, Is worth millions of dollars today Looking back on yesteryears , good parenting and good memories
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Oct 6, 2015
Oct 6, 2015 at 8:48 AM UTC
Grandmother’s Perfumes Bottles
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ She had her own signature scent, A lasting aroma, that lingers in every corner of her home As the strong winds picked up the scent, and move it quite a distance. She carefully prepare the mixture from the earth Cuss ,kuss grass, Jasmine, rose buds and roots, Before she prepare the mixtures with that special touch Like a fine wine from the winery, “One more drop of Rosemary oil, she would say This would make the scent last for eternity, Old Granddad he would make silly jokes, His word usages, madam chemist, a witch with a spoon, But in the end, she would always made a special potion for him We would carefully select the flaky mahogany woods shaving, with combinations of fresh vanilla leaves with extracting oil with oils Those homemade perfumes from flowers had lots of potential. Granddad hand craft the wooded bottle stoppers with his chisel, It was a joy to watch, the old Irish typhoon working and smoking his pipe Old Alan baffler was Nana nickname for him She would scold and speak harshly to us for touching the those colorful luring bottles “Don’t open those bottles, you malicious children Else a witch would appear: She would often say, For me, my nana was an old chemist, with old decade’s wooden sticks. Preparing the mixtures like a fine wine, I am forever grateful for those memories I should have follow in her footsteps, Her secret potions, her gift, Is worth millions of dollars today Looking back on yesteryears , good parenting and good memories
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33
I have a right to stand I'm claiming it now. Turangawaewae; 'a place to stand' Is a deep empowerment from the land Learnt through ancestral connection Strengthened through ahi ka; 'keeping the fires burning' Well, my ancestral stories ain't so impressive There were few battles Though my granddad worked for the air force in world war two - As an accountant We didn't encounter the gods or try to bring down the sun Though when my Grandma arrived here she built up the soil Soul of the Earth For 70 years As the city sprang up around her And my mother aged 11 played follow the leader with a goat in the next door construction site Where her house is now My uncle found an old mans false teeth in a cup Climbing through an abandoned house My aunt visited James K Baxter's Jerusalem She wasn't a fan of his poetry But his wisdom spoke to her My other aunts jumped through the neighbours trees Who threatened to shoot them My father followed my mother here After her O.E with my sister in the oven He ******* about John Key as much as anyone And praises this land; it is home. I stood on a windy cliff surrounded by pohutukawa and learnt the whisper of the sea Roughing it on an island I tried determinedly to turn into a pukeko I got my first cut, bruise, scrape from this land My first breath, poem, touch of a violin, my first kiss was here I know the rough patches, the fringe scene, where the best soil is (It's at my grams house) I know how to spot a drug house, which cafes will let us jam, where the open mics are 5 days of the week. I know Kirikiriroa. My fires have been burning And I have a right to stand I have learnt through my own evolution Through Janet Frame's railroad country Through a history Cities growing and spreading They weren't just here As it has always seemed to me. The countryside, what was here before? Landscapes of forest and mountain Familiar yet unknown to me. When I go away I will know the difference When I return I will know this land The depth recognized through contrast Defined by difference As the sun and moon complement Light and dark Sorrow and joy And, As in yin and yang I will know nothing is completely separate. When I go away I will know So fully And I will return and say: This is my place to stand My turangawaewae My Aotearoa
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Nov 16, 2014
Nov 16, 2014 at 7:24 PM UTC
Turangawaewae
I have a right to stand I'm claiming it now. Turangawaewae; 'a place to stand' Is a deep empowerment from the land Learnt through ancestral connection Strengthened through ahi ka; 'keeping the fires burning' Well, my ancestral stories ain't so impressive There were few battles Though my granddad worked for the air force in world war two - As an accountant We didn't encounter the gods or try to bring down the sun Though when my Grandma arrived here she built up the soil Soul of the Earth For 70 years As the city sprang up around her And my mother aged 11 played follow the leader with a goat in the next door construction site Where her house is now My uncle found an old mans false teeth in a cup Climbing through an abandoned house My aunt visited James K Baxter's Jerusalem She wasn't a fan of his poetry But his wisdom spoke to her My other aunts jumped through the neighbours trees Who threatened to shoot them My father followed my mother here After her O.E with my sister in the oven He ******* about John Key as much as anyone And praises this land; it is home. I stood on a windy cliff surrounded by pohutukawa and learnt the whisper of the sea Roughing it on an island I tried determinedly to turn into a pukeko I got my first cut, bruise, scrape from this land My first breath, poem, touch of a violin, my first kiss was here I know the rough patches, the fringe scene, where the best soil is (It's at my grams house) I know how to spot a drug house, which cafes will let us jam, where the open mics are 5 days of the week. I know Kirikiriroa. My fires have been burning And I have a right to stand I have learnt through my own evolution Through Janet Frame's railroad country Through a history Cities growing and spreading They weren't just here As it has always seemed to me. The countryside, what was here before? Landscapes of forest and mountain Familiar yet unknown to me. When I go away I will know the difference When I return I will know this land The depth recognized through contrast Defined by difference As the sun and moon complement Light and dark Sorrow and joy And, As in yin and yang I will know nothing is completely separate. When I go away I will know So fully And I will return and say: This is my place to stand My turangawaewae My Aotearoa
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63
Your Uncle Fred on Christmas Eve at Gran’s house when you were a kid did the sand dance wearing an old fashion man’s striped nightgown and a red fez (he got that in Egypt during WW2 Gran said) and brown open toed sandals and Uncle Ed turned the handle of the windup gramophone where an old 78rpm record was playing and there were glasses of sherry being consumed and cigarettes being smoked and you sat watching clapping your hands and Gran would get up afterwards and do her Can-Can like she used to as she young woman on the stage and Granddad sat there quiet saying nothing looking at the people gathered sipping his sherry watching his wife lifting her legs her white fuzzy hair going to and fro as she moved and you wanted to have some sherry but your mother said no you have lemonade little boys don’t have sherry so you sat with your lemonade watching Uncle Fred and his dance and the music coming from the old gramophone and the smell of sherry and beer and cigarette smoke and Uncle telling the adults one of his old army jokes.
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Sep 15, 2012
Sep 15, 2012 at 5:26 AM UTC
UNCLE FRED AND THE SAND DANCE.
To see things through child's eyes A world seen different Not like an adult Everything has its place Order, Structure, Harmony, But every now and then, Relax, Let your hair down (Even if your bald) The child within needs to be free Fun, Enjoyable Crazy Be like the child within, Play with your young ones Not as a giant, Become their size Jiggle your **** Be silly Lie on the floor, be their bouncy castle, Even though all the wind is out When you arise from the floor, See through the eyes of your child Imagination, Dancing, With your tongue wigging about, Be the Parent, Uncle, Aunty, Granddad, Or Nan,   But every so often relax Let the child within run rampant And have some childish fun be free...
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Aug 17, 2014
Aug 17, 2014 at 4:00 PM UTC
The Child Within
Written for a school project September 09, 2013 To: Evan Riddle From: Granddad Well, I understand that you would like to have a letter from me, recognizing certain traits, and accomplishments, and so forth. Begging your pardon, I will begin in this manner. A couple of years ago, during a"pre-game warmup" prior to the start of one of your games, I was standing behind the glass watching the pucks bounce off your chest. A young boy, perhaps a year younger, came up, stood beside me, also watching you. He then turned, yelling to a friend, "here he is, #41!"  He was quickly joined by his friend and another, all three watching you at close range.You have no idea how that made me feel. How proud of you I was, that apparently your reputation was developing among your peers within the "ice crowd." In my home, on a wall, is a photo of you, taken during the All-Star game in Ottawa, Canada. You, wearing the red and white All-Star jersey,  standing in front of the net watching and observing the action that soon would be coming at you. This is my favorite photo. The expression on your face silently reflects your abilities to "focus" on what you are supposed to do, the "determination" to do it, and the "perseverance" to get it done. Three traits that have followed, and stayed with you, and guided you to be successful, in all you have accomplished in both sport and academic activities in which you have participated. You are respected by your team, your coaches, your teachers, and your classmates. You can't have better than that. Love you, Granddad
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May 13, 2015
May 13, 2015 at 8:09 AM UTC
To My Grandson-Evan Riddle
Written for a school project September 09, 2013 To: Evan Riddle From: Granddad Well, I understand that you would like to have a letter from me, recognizing certain traits, and accomplishments, and so forth. Begging your pardon, I will begin in this manner. A couple of years ago, during a"pre-game warmup" prior to the start of one of your games, I was standing behind the glass watching the pucks bounce off your chest. A young boy, perhaps a year younger, came up, stood beside me, also watching you. He then turned, yelling to a friend, "here he is, #41!"  He was quickly joined by his friend and another, all three watching you at close range.You have no idea how that made me feel. How proud of you I was, that apparently your reputation was developing among your peers within the "ice crowd." In my home, on a wall, is a photo of you, taken during the All-Star game in Ottawa, Canada. You, wearing the red and white All-Star jersey,  standing in front of the net watching and observing the action that soon would be coming at you. This is my favorite photo. The expression on your face silently reflects your abilities to "focus" on what you are supposed to do, the "determination" to do it, and the "perseverance" to get it done. Three traits that have followed, and stayed with you, and guided you to be successful, in all you have accomplished in both sport and academic activities in which you have participated. You are respected by your team, your coaches, your teachers, and your classmates. You can't have better than that. Love you, Granddad
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10
Eavesdropping A good man is hard to find Said my Nana, That was the day I saw tears in my nana’s eyes As she nervously stuff her monthly tithe in the envelope And headed out to church that Sunday morning Before, shouting at my granddad I guess she was mad as hell at the old fool That was the day I found out that my hero my grandpa Was having an affair with the widower Estelline Beckley “Ellie you’re the only woman for me said my Granddad” However, my Nana wasn’t haven’t any of that So she slammed the door on Grand dad I remember being scare, and confused, About this family feud So, I hid under the table, and prayed to God for the scream and shouting to be over For several weeks all my Nana did was prayed And all Granddad done was to burnt her pots and pans Boiling water and making coffee. Nana told the neighbors, that those harlot with a trail For a rear end, can cause a man to climbed, a mountain without his proper gears That statement still baffles me until this day. Until many years later when I met my mother’s sister here in New York the spit and image of my mother. But had the very spirit and expression of my Granddad so much for eave dropping and family affair
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Jun 12, 2013
Jun 12, 2013 at 10:25 AM UTC
Eavesdropping
Ashley,      Your blues inspire me, insipid triangles, walking cold, sweating more and wetting the bed your lips the sizes of gods that I married through hidden video cameras, I caught bias in bliss, racism in slow disasters, tornado sirens and just sirens, and justice on the horizon. My eyelids the sizes of your little ******* the party of tomorrow, the starting sounds of scarred and stripped *** sounds. Caught in a drift, my bottom lip stuffed with lift-lust and jolting up and down your porcelain rift. Messed up and round the back to the buttons, the clasp too heavy to drop your ego down, the cold too swift to catch me as I fell. The heavens too burdened to beat me with your god. I just wanted to me smacked in the face with your flaws. Hips the sizes of doorknobs, hurdles that I caught one weekend sipping slow gin with granddad and papa and Tootsie, your evils carnivorous, your mess much more than your message. Your koo-koo voodoo and big bad red frock. Tuesday's made me the man I am today. The Slayer made me the hate I stuffed into my **** jock-strap to puff out my chest and make prisms in kitten litters and furrow the night clauses to match stick the pumped-up bypass of hazmat and heroism, I was won and didn't know it, you were one and now you're all one. She,      came to me in French class holding straws. I picked swiftly and came, all staled and stiff, lock-jaw and threesomes one moonlit night the fourth of July.
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May 2, 2014
May 2, 2014 at 3:09 PM UTC
Streams of Golden Consciousness
GRANDAD TENDS HIS DAHLIAS the fog walks among the tombs "I encounter my first *** he was a man he looked just like me as if I were...killing myself!" stretching back through space & time the instant of that moment the German falls beside a tomb like a badly written play Grandad bayonettes the German...looks surprised to be dying Grandad plunges the bayonette in twists it about the German almost grins then the dance of the living & the dying in strict time the German goes down on one knee as if proposing to Death Granddad stabs the German through the lifeline of his left hand the dying German's left outstretched hand like a man about to sing a song "As he fell his hand touched my hand 'This...' I thought '...is hell!'" all his life the touch...that touch impossible to shake off Grandad tends his dahlias the dying German still clouding his eyes
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Apr 8, 2019
Apr 8, 2019 at 7:45 AM UTC
GRANDAD TENDS HIS DAHLIAS
PROCESSIONS that lack high stilts have nothing that catches the eye. What if my great-granddad had a pair that were twenty foot high, And mine were but fifteen foot, no modern Stalks upon higher, Some rogue of the world stole them to patch up a fence or a fire. Because piebald ponies, led bears, caged lions, ake but poor shows, Because children demand Daddy-long-legs upon This timber toes, Because women in the upper storeys demand a face at the pane, That patching old heels they may shriek, I take to chisel and plane. Malachi Stilt-Jack am I, whatever I learned has run wild, From collar to collar, from stilt to stilt, from father to child. All metaphor, Malachi, stilts and all. A barnacle goose Far up in the stretches of night; night splits and the dawn breaks loose; I, through the terrible novelty of light, stalk on, stalk on; Those great sea-horses bare their teeth and laugh at the dawn.
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2.1k
High Talk
how i forget to cherish these little moments of our togetherness; making an early meal of sauteed vegetables and eggs, "froached" like i used to call them when i was your little chef and would bring you breakfast on special occasions, and sometimes on sundays, just because it was sunday and dad didn't have to leave for work long before the crack of dawn even set its alarm. we'd all sit in bed together, squished into sharing a cozy comfort, sandwiched between you two and my old buddy gladly the bear who still sits on your bed upstairs in his pink- and-green striped shirt. but then i guess somewhere along the way i grew up; the move happened-- i didn't visit gladly anymore, or you for that matter. today you asked me to get the big jar -- the carnation                       (top) jar, from the shelf of the kitchen    cabinet while i     explained my oddly convoluted thought process, and we talked about how my granddad danced you down the aisle to django on a whim of a kooky family friend, and how i finally realized how little i actually know of you-- but that's normal. i might be growing up now, and i might not visit that little bear anymore, but what i never really told you, or anyone, is that i have my own now, a blue one who used to be called blueberry, renamed as joseph stalin, because i'm a big boy now, and my sense of humor dried out long ago. i may not be your little chef anymore, but i can still make you breakfast, and bring it to your bed on sundays, and sit with gladly, and quietly chat until late morning like we used to (never) do.
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Dec 8, 2012
Dec 8, 2012 at 6:01 PM UTC
breakfast and teddy bears
how i forget to cherish these little moments of our togetherness; making an early meal of sauteed vegetables and eggs, "froached" like i used to call them when i was your little chef and would bring you breakfast on special occasions, and sometimes on sundays, just because it was sunday and dad didn't have to leave for work long before the crack of dawn even set its alarm. we'd all sit in bed together, squished into sharing a cozy comfort, sandwiched between you two and my old buddy gladly the bear who still sits on your bed upstairs in his pink- and-green striped shirt. but then i guess somewhere along the way i grew up; the move happened-- i didn't visit gladly anymore, or you for that matter. today you asked me to get the big jar -- the carnation                       (top) jar, from the shelf of the kitchen    cabinet while i     explained my oddly convoluted thought process, and we talked about how my granddad danced you down the aisle to django on a whim of a kooky family friend, and how i finally realized how little i actually know of you-- but that's normal. i might be growing up now, and i might not visit that little bear anymore, but what i never really told you, or anyone, is that i have my own now, a blue one who used to be called blueberry, renamed as joseph stalin, because i'm a big boy now, and my sense of humor dried out long ago. i may not be your little chef anymore, but i can still make you breakfast, and bring it to your bed on sundays, and sit with gladly, and quietly chat until late morning like we used to (never) do.
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88
I woke from the deepest of daydreams, my eyes focusing after being long glazed over. It’s late in the afternoon-- the light pours through the window— it draws across above my left shoulder. The tea kettle whistles like a freight train in the background. She’s in the kitchen, but I can easily see her veiny hands dropping the Earl Grey tea ball into the scolding water. —her hands, like old softly crumpled white paper. The same routine, every day since great granddad passed in 1961. Rock forward, rock backward. What time could it be? Was I out for long? Fresh cut grass, the familiar smell of lawn and moth ball I so readily identify with this old Victorian house built by my family. Evermore, the scent of kerosene dances with the freshness of bologna and tomato sandwiches on lightly toasted pumpernickel bread. Where’s that 1000 piece puzzle with kittens in a basket? Long gone? I guess it’s been over a decade since me and my sister last conquered that puzzle and strategically placed connected and sectioned chunks back in the box for easy assemblage on future rainy days. Rock forward, rock backward. Her first step from kitchen tile to wood planks sets off a chain reaction of creeks and moans that only wood of this age and wear can produce. She enters the sitting room, puts the tea tray atop the white baby grand piano: “tea time, honey,” she whispers with a crooked smile and sad eyes. Rock forward, rock backward.
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Mar 7, 2013
Mar 7, 2013 at 11:55 PM UTC
Viola's Rocking Chair
My grandfather's not dead but you act like he is the way you tiptoe around the closed oak door way you whisper in a scratchy voice when you talk about the future way you pop in your set of pearly whites and bare your teeth too easily when he asks you for a glass of water and your brassy trumpet tells him of course, dear, are you feeling okay? You think that I've caught on and know better than to trade him secrets beneath the cracked door to your bedroom like copper pennies for freedom and that I don't remember him throwing diving sticks at the bottom of the pool then snatching them up and waving them above his head far from my six-year-old reach or when sitting upon his knee as a child I would pick at the edges of the sepia photos as he traced the veins of our family back to seventy-second great-aunts and royalty I help you count the red pills as I recall my favorite hiding place (your fireplace) and you shake your head and scold me that was an awful place to hide what if there had been cinders? I tell you we live in Texas and tuck my wishes back into my pocket and mention that Granddad thought it was a fantastic place to visit and that I would sit there for hours and pretend I was a phoenix from the old mythology books in the musty back of your closet You laugh as you slip him his pills you can't possibly remember that But I remember and I insist on discussing college while he's in the room his wrinkly eyes smile when I plot out my dreams and he knows that I know but I keep our secret anyway you simper at my mother oh, isn't she precious hopeful and hoping a cure will be found but you don't realize I've already discovered it: Pretend like nothing has happened Don't let them see the ticking hours on the mantelpiece As long as we know that we're not older beneath these transcripts and chemotherapies the real world doesn't matter not really, not at all My grandfather's alive even if you think he isn't but he is and he's sitting in your drawing room so why don't you pop by for a visit? we're only pretending, anyway.
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Aug 8, 2010
Aug 8, 2010 at 8:33 PM UTC
copper pennies
My grandfather's not dead but you act like he is the way you tiptoe around the closed oak door way you whisper in a scratchy voice when you talk about the future way you pop in your set of pearly whites and bare your teeth too easily when he asks you for a glass of water and your brassy trumpet tells him of course, dear, are you feeling okay? You think that I've caught on and know better than to trade him secrets beneath the cracked door to your bedroom like copper pennies for freedom and that I don't remember him throwing diving sticks at the bottom of the pool then snatching them up and waving them above his head far from my six-year-old reach or when sitting upon his knee as a child I would pick at the edges of the sepia photos as he traced the veins of our family back to seventy-second great-aunts and royalty I help you count the red pills as I recall my favorite hiding place (your fireplace) and you shake your head and scold me that was an awful place to hide what if there had been cinders? I tell you we live in Texas and tuck my wishes back into my pocket and mention that Granddad thought it was a fantastic place to visit and that I would sit there for hours and pretend I was a phoenix from the old mythology books in the musty back of your closet You laugh as you slip him his pills you can't possibly remember that But I remember and I insist on discussing college while he's in the room his wrinkly eyes smile when I plot out my dreams and he knows that I know but I keep our secret anyway you simper at my mother oh, isn't she precious hopeful and hoping a cure will be found but you don't realize I've already discovered it: Pretend like nothing has happened Don't let them see the ticking hours on the mantelpiece As long as we know that we're not older beneath these transcripts and chemotherapies the real world doesn't matter not really, not at all My grandfather's alive even if you think he isn't but he is and he's sitting in your drawing room so why don't you pop by for a visit? we're only pretending, anyway.
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I held up that grand quilt in my tiny hands, thoughts rushing past my mind. That denim piece splattered with red paint, ah, remember when you wore that for the first time as you picked carrots with Dad? That cotton piece filled with a vibrant orange, how could you forget? That was the dress you wore to your first ever play recital. That baby pink rayon piece, you wore that on the first day of high school, you could not forget. That grey wool piece, that was your Christmas present, and you wore it near the fire. You spilled hot coco on it. That rare purple leather, that is too important to forget. Remember, it was the jacket you wore on you first date. That blue flannel piece, you loved that one. You wore it all the time, ever since the first time you wore it when you won “best speaker” at a school competition. That brown cupro piece, you wore that to your mother's birthday, the one where she got promoted to L.A. That green polyester piece, never can forget, could you? That was the shirt you wore when Dad and Mom divorced.   That white lyocell piece, you wore it at your graduation party, and your whole family was there. That barkcloth piece, it was a day to remember, you united with you brother once again in that dress. That calico piece, you wore that to the hospital when Granddad got a heart attack. That black and white damask piece, that was so beautiful, so you kept it for your dinner. Which you hadn't realized was your engagement dinner with your boyfriend. That red gingham piece, wow, that was the time you met your dad's girlfriend. And Mom had not moved on. That black lace piece, a day never to forget. It was the funeral of your Granddad’s, and that was the dress you wore. That grey gauze piece, it was the shawl you wore when you visited your grandma, and found out she was ill of depression. That amazing white gazar piece, a memorable day. It was the dress you wore to you wedding. That turquoise silk piece, *too soon after your wedding. It was the part of the purse you took to your Grandma's funeral. * That white and blue jacquard fabric, that was the fabric you had for your curtains, when you moved into your own house. That leopard print intarsia piece, it was an amazing day. Your mother visited you the first time in your new home. The both of you cried with the rain pouring outside. Nothing could have ruined that beautiful moment together, united. That satin cobalt blue piece, that dress you wore to the dinner with your parents and husband. Only to later realize that you brother had met with an accident. That exotic lantana piece, you remember, don't you? You wore that dress when you met your brother days later, severely hurt. That red lace piece, you went to London with your husband wearing that. You were so excited. That madras piece, it came from that cushion out of the four your husband bought you. That cream organdy piece, your mother had found it in her closet, a dress from her mother's, and wanted to give it to you. That deep purple paisley piece, you wore that on the day your mother died. And like that, all the thoughts came back to me. All the pieces of my past, fit in together. But it never made sense – that was how my life worked. And there were more pieces, more parts, to fit together, until my life was spread out in front of me. Like a patched quilt.
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Dec 18, 2014
Dec 18, 2014 at 3:32 AM UTC
Patched Quilt
I held up that grand quilt in my tiny hands, thoughts rushing past my mind. That denim piece splattered with red paint, ah, remember when you wore that for the first time as you picked carrots with Dad? That cotton piece filled with a vibrant orange, how could you forget? That was the dress you wore to your first ever play recital. That baby pink rayon piece, you wore that on the first day of high school, you could not forget. That grey wool piece, that was your Christmas present, and you wore it near the fire. You spilled hot coco on it. That rare purple leather, that is too important to forget. Remember, it was the jacket you wore on you first date. That blue flannel piece, you loved that one. You wore it all the time, ever since the first time you wore it when you won “best speaker” at a school competition. That brown cupro piece, you wore that to your mother's birthday, the one where she got promoted to L.A. That green polyester piece, never can forget, could you? That was the shirt you wore when Dad and Mom divorced.   That white lyocell piece, you wore it at your graduation party, and your whole family was there. That barkcloth piece, it was a day to remember, you united with you brother once again in that dress. That calico piece, you wore that to the hospital when Granddad got a heart attack. That black and white damask piece, that was so beautiful, so you kept it for your dinner. Which you hadn't realized was your engagement dinner with your boyfriend. That red gingham piece, wow, that was the time you met your dad's girlfriend. And Mom had not moved on. That black lace piece, a day never to forget. It was the funeral of your Granddad’s, and that was the dress you wore. That grey gauze piece, it was the shawl you wore when you visited your grandma, and found out she was ill of depression. That amazing white gazar piece, a memorable day. It was the dress you wore to you wedding. That turquoise silk piece, *too soon after your wedding. It was the part of the purse you took to your Grandma's funeral. * That white and blue jacquard fabric, that was the fabric you had for your curtains, when you moved into your own house. That leopard print intarsia piece, it was an amazing day. Your mother visited you the first time in your new home. The both of you cried with the rain pouring outside. Nothing could have ruined that beautiful moment together, united. That satin cobalt blue piece, that dress you wore to the dinner with your parents and husband. Only to later realize that you brother had met with an accident. That exotic lantana piece, you remember, don't you? You wore that dress when you met your brother days later, severely hurt. That red lace piece, you went to London with your husband wearing that. You were so excited. That madras piece, it came from that cushion out of the four your husband bought you. That cream organdy piece, your mother had found it in her closet, a dress from her mother's, and wanted to give it to you. That deep purple paisley piece, you wore that on the day your mother died. And like that, all the thoughts came back to me. All the pieces of my past, fit in together. But it never made sense – that was how my life worked. And there were more pieces, more parts, to fit together, until my life was spread out in front of me. Like a patched quilt.
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I feel apart of this hick town place Breathing in life, through open, clean air Trapped by my mind in a wide open space My granddad showed me on his Gum tree The marks left by moths and beetles alike I went to touch them whilst he let them be The Scribbly Gum tells the same story Our lives intertwined in memories The aftermath of destruction, can be beauty My chubby hands admire what my eyes miss like a blind man hungry for the verse I feel the indented trails, lead me into the abyss I envy those tiny critters, hiding away creating art without even knowing One day I shall join them and there I shall stay Dancing glimpses of times past The smell of eucalyptus sticking to hot air Pulling, aching strings of my childish heart
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May 5, 2017
May 5, 2017 at 11:56 PM UTC
Scribbly Gum
D Day Amongst us walk the ghosts of our past Silent screams that shout and hollow "we died for you" I look around and bow my head in shame For I have let their giving be worthless I have failed They lost So that we may have a future A better place so that us siblings Can live Love Grasp for life Fade less hate See the saying D Day is still used today Yet how many think back to the lives lost Our loss Our granddad's Our family Their lives My failure is mirrored in the failure of the world Religion after religion Gun against gun Life fighting life One day I hope words will be the healer Language our fighters And soldiers our builders One day Will We Have a better world One day!!
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Nov 8, 2014
Nov 8, 2014 at 3:14 AM UTC
D Day (Remembrance day)
I've been asked by our son and the grandchildren, Evan and Emily, "Granddad, what would you like to have Santa bring you for Christmas?" A stock answer with grandparents nearly everywhere is, "Don't get me anything, for I have everything I need or want, so save your money." Although this is a true answer, I usually give some kind of a rediculous answer like, "A pair of horseshoes would be nice." They smile, laugh, but it wouldn't surprise me if they bought a pair. When I say, "I have what I want", I mean just that. For you see, my family, our son Russ, daughter-in-law, Mea, Evan and Emily, and my "Guardian Angel", "Brie", are my Christmas gifts, 365 days a year. I can't ask for more than that! copyright: richard riddle- 12-21-2015
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Dec 21, 2015
Dec 21, 2015 at 9:52 AM UTC
Best Christmas Gifts
Bevelled slick edges, and reeaal eeaasy slopes. Chilli dip wedges with fresh artichokes. Wanton loose wenches and swivel hipped ****** Daft dawgs and dentures and granddad - who snores.
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Oct 5, 2013
Oct 5, 2013 at 1:19 PM UTC
"- Think Julie Andrews -"
A silver pipe strikes me on the left-hand window, breaking the dullness of these grey hospital walls. Granddad, you’re due for your umpteenth colonoscopy, and here I am thinking about how your IV’d wrists strip away light like a prism. They bandage the hurt leaking from your eyes and let rainbows clog up your insides. (Is that why you can't go, you old geezer?) (Smile a bit more, will you?)
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Jul 1, 2015
Jul 1, 2015 at 1:57 PM UTC
Sickness
There's a Mexican saying, (I'm Chinese American and yet i know this; don't ask me how or why, because if you knew how much i talk about you, i think i'd die.) There's a Mexican saying, "It's a small step from hate to love." I hated that you pulled me up in front of a full room and pointed out my **** granted you weren't saying anything about my **** but more the fact that we were wearing the same style of checkered shorts. i hated that you didn't make sense when you told our friends about your grand scheme to start a library with two books. who starts a library with two books?!? YOU CAN'T! i hate that at dinner that night, i actually enjoyed talking to you, bantering and bickering laughing and smiling. and then "you two are like an old married couple". i hate that you started calling me when your granddad passed away because you couldn't talk to anyone else. and we'd talk for hours and hours because we actually had that much to say. i hate that you wanted to spend time with me. i hate that you wanted to see me. i hate that you wanted to help me. i hate that you wanted to get to know me. i hate it because i wasn't expecting it. and the hardest thing is that we're just friends. i don't know when it happened and i don't know how. but i can't just be friends with you. i don't want to be just friends with you. because i took that small step… from hate to love. ok, so i don't love that you pointed out to a room full of friends and other people that my **** was in a pair of shorts much like yours. but i love that you noticed me. i don't love that you think a library is two books. but i love that you like what i like. i don't love that people think we're an old married couple. but i love that i want to be an old married couple with you. i don't love that you used up a lot of my cell phone minutes, but i love that you didn't want to talk to anyone else. i love that you want to spend time with me. i love that you want to see me. i love that you want to help me. i love that you want to get to know me. and i love that i'm in love with you. i wish i could tell you. i wish i could say it out loud. I'm wishing my whispers at night on the first star in the night sky come true because i'm wishing for you.
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Jul 30, 2010
Jul 30, 2010 at 4:40 PM UTC
A Mexican Saying
There's a Mexican saying, (I'm Chinese American and yet i know this; don't ask me how or why, because if you knew how much i talk about you, i think i'd die.) There's a Mexican saying, "It's a small step from hate to love." I hated that you pulled me up in front of a full room and pointed out my **** granted you weren't saying anything about my **** but more the fact that we were wearing the same style of checkered shorts. i hated that you didn't make sense when you told our friends about your grand scheme to start a library with two books. who starts a library with two books?!? YOU CAN'T! i hate that at dinner that night, i actually enjoyed talking to you, bantering and bickering laughing and smiling. and then "you two are like an old married couple". i hate that you started calling me when your granddad passed away because you couldn't talk to anyone else. and we'd talk for hours and hours because we actually had that much to say. i hate that you wanted to spend time with me. i hate that you wanted to see me. i hate that you wanted to help me. i hate that you wanted to get to know me. i hate it because i wasn't expecting it. and the hardest thing is that we're just friends. i don't know when it happened and i don't know how. but i can't just be friends with you. i don't want to be just friends with you. because i took that small step… from hate to love. ok, so i don't love that you pointed out to a room full of friends and other people that my **** was in a pair of shorts much like yours. but i love that you noticed me. i don't love that you think a library is two books. but i love that you like what i like. i don't love that people think we're an old married couple. but i love that i want to be an old married couple with you. i don't love that you used up a lot of my cell phone minutes, but i love that you didn't want to talk to anyone else. i love that you want to spend time with me. i love that you want to see me. i love that you want to help me. i love that you want to get to know me. and i love that i'm in love with you. i wish i could tell you. i wish i could say it out loud. I'm wishing my whispers at night on the first star in the night sky come true because i'm wishing for you.
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