How can you **** all night on a broken bed?
This jealousy is taking over my head
Can't stop punching that ******* face
Watching blood spray allover the place

How can you ****  all night on a broken bed?
While I was home filled with dread
You told me we'd try augain
After we fxcked at 10am

You'd left by mid day
I smiled and kissed where you'd lay
But by the time darkness came
You'd fxcked her again

While I cried down the phone
Confused and all alone
You offered her protection
not from getting her pregnant

How can you **** all night on a broken bed?

Vapid people
dribbling vapid shxt.
A society of ****-eyed,
drunken infants
debating politics memorised
from Fox News.

We, the awakened,
plastering social media
with doll-faced mannequins
captioned with some Eastern Philosophy
we read in Cosmo,
enhanced with a filter
titled "Who The **** Is Lao Tzu?"
Comments read: goals af.
(Insert emoji here)

And praise the Indigo Children!
It's a true gift indeed
to talk about activism
until blue in the face.
My, what a spiritual hue, are you.
Are you?

A generation of craft makers,
weaving their way
through the alcoholic labyrinth,
drawing the Hungover Man
from a Rider Waite tarot deck,
for another episode of Dull and Duller
next weekend.

Amid daylight
I feel so inferior
I'd constantly bury my face in my hands
Feeling completely ashamed,
Feeling completely defeated,
For what I still
Genuinely feel about you

What the ****,
Is dealing with questions from the heart
What the ****,
Is believing in a blessing from what has torn apart
I've got all of these pieces in my head fighting to breathe
Fighting to breathe for the air in my heart
But how will it ever work out
If these pieces and my heart were never on talking terms

It hurts
Hurts so bad that I
look forward to every twilight
So that I can fall
Fall for the night over
And over again
Cause there's no where else
That I can ever seek the comfort
That I need
But from only what lies within
The ambience of silent nights

It's the only time
Where it will always feel as though
I've never let you go

With a little bit of bleach and a rounded xss
they think they can be Marilyn Monroe
but never strive high enough to **** a JFK,
instead they're down on their knees for a Trump
refreshing their Instagram.

I sat at the bar
You sat at the other end
You just had a fight with your boyfriend
that the whole bar saw begin

He left in a rage
you returned to your drink in a huff
I nursed my drink to build up courage
because I desperately wanted to ****!

Finally I walked over to you
and said "I hope your alright"
she looked dead at me and said
"I need something new tonight"
"What do you mean? I can buy you a drink"
"No I need you tonight not a drink".

I finished off my malt brown whiskey
as she downed her dry martini
I called in a cab
he showed up, and in the back we talked... shall we say freaky

I barely knew your name
in fact I know next to nothing about you at all
but when I laid my eyes on you
my cxck was at your beck and call
We walked into my apartment and I kissed your soft neck
beer goggles weren't on, but she still looked a positive ten

We made our way into my bedroom
our restraint left at the door
you laid me down on my bed
and made me your personal wxore

I caressed her soft warm *******
as she bounced upon my cxck
I laid my tongue upon her lips
as her puxxy my cxck was at rest

As she moaned out her pleasure I said "come to the kitchen"
I barely knew her but so wasn't love,
it was lust with which I was smitten

I bent her over ny kitchen counter
all my things she slid,
I pulled her hair back and spanked her hard
she said "**** me like I'm your little bitxh"

We fxcked ******* the floor, in the room, in the kitchen, on the elevator in the stairwell,
We had more *** than a concubine on hormones, a week had passed before we finally got our clothes on,
"hey I still don't know who you are, what's your name?"
"You'll know, call me next time you have a *******."

This isn't a poem of rhymes and games,
Oh no.
I'm here to tell you that Love isn't something that hurts.

Your mind believes all the lies you constantly tell it,
The wishes that create problems that,
Guess what?!
Were never there to begin with.

Just embrace the fact that you're in Love.
Nobody falls "in" and "out" of Love.

It's not a substance.
It's not the catalyst to living a
"Happy life".

I feel like people are constantly
Corrupting what Love is.
You don't describe a word,
With more words.

It is,
What it is.

Don't try to make it something it's not.
Don't try to make it personal.
Don't try to define it.
Don't try to possess it.

Just...
STOP.

/breath

I'm not here
To tell you a poem of rhymes and games.
I'm here to tell you that Love doesn't hurt.
It never will.
Never should.

Ever.
Should you think otherwise,
Just look back at the person,
Place,
Or thing,
That you associated yourself to loving.
Think back.

Take a breath.
Breathe.

For days I've been unable to write poetry and someone told me I should just write something...

This is me writing 'something'.
I hate writing about this situation but I'm purging.

Lol, all I wanted was mutuality but even in the brightest of times, it was mission impossible. Seems a bit foolish of me to have invested basically my all into someone so ...transparent. The lies and deception dripping like wet paint off of her giving the reflection of a colored person was visible to everyone but me ...to me she was still transparent. From the start, I made a promise to myself never to succumb to any negative forces interfering with what was supposed to be a 'Nirvana'. I still remember the tedious efforts of sneaking to her window. I still remember everything we did and her lips still feel close to mine ...for now. My retrogression occurs once again. Tomorrow, her name will no longer be locked onto my tongue, no longer stitched onto my heart. Instead, her name will do nothing but damage what was once whole but it's fine because tomorrow there'll be another. Tomorrow your name will be '****** from my lips ensuring it never comes back up'. Tomorrow, what was once so sacred between us won't be so sacred. Tomorrow it begins; tomorrow I regress.

You see,  I'm no dummy. Somewhere between the lines of
loving me too little
and
not loving me at all,
you found a bucket of lies with my name on it and you fed em to me until  even you succumbed to the deception. Luckily, you caught yourself so can I really blame you for what you did?
You say I play the 'victim'? I am a 'victim'.
a victim of being cheated on, lied to, played and rode like the donkey jesus sat on lol ...just a little humor to ease the level of despondency.
im a victim of tragedy.

Do you even know how it feels to be so happily in love with someone? so confident that someone is yours just yours and then watch that person willingly get swept off their feet and out of your life? never have i ever felt so confident that someone was mine and all mine, someone i could love and trust...
You won't ever understand how I felt that night.
...sitting there with the biggest smile on my face and the warmest heart ...then your neck.
I didn't just see a 'purple bloom' my dearest love. I saw my life flash before my eyes, I knew you were no longer mine for on your neck you were branded and you walked proudly with it. With your branded neck you stood there proudly and confident in yourself. ****, i hate you. you stood there smiling a smile that was no longer just for me. You stood there and kissed my cheek...if only I had known the devaluation of that kiss. You held my hands but if only I knew that those hands were not too long ago wrapped around and lustfully attached to another.

Although my way of getting over you isn't right, I'm **** sure it'll work. You want me to share you. That's what you want and I should've expected it from the 'first occurrence'. You want to be in the middle and who am I to judge? I'm just stuck, maybe? I'm no fool. I've done my wrongs and I've kept my secrets from you but in no way have I came remotely close to doing this to you. I stood by you through every hurricane, sheltering you. How is it that it's so easy for you to be apart from me? All I wanted was to be secure but you're so immature and can't even secure yourself, check your wrists.

I sincerely wish you the best. Disregarding all my bitter thoughts, I do hope you're happy.

It was another one of those nights
I came home, I missed you. i was lonely
I got In and you weren't home
Geez I'm Oh so *****

I made dinner and walked into the room
I dropped down on the bed
I looked over and read a note
nestled sweetly beside my head

I opened it up
and this is what it said
"Hey lover, I'm hiding from you
come find me use your head ;)"

Task in mind
I took off my shoes
Your little game driving out
all of my blues.

I tried the garage, not a sign of you to be found
I tried the kitchen and attic.
nope your still not around,

I searched in the bathrooms and found a clue
it was another note
"You're getting warmer lover, I'm closer than you think was what she wrote

Intrigued, I went to the room my journey began in,
I walked to the bedroom door and you said
"Come in"

I opened the door slowly n poked my head inside
I saw you wearing that lingerie we picked out
I grew hard at the sight

Calling me over
with those soft blue eyes
you already knew you had me mesmerized.

As you pulled on my necktie I heard you say
I know you had it rough, I'm gonna **** you all better today ;)

**** you you justly
neutered mongrel and the hand
that is up your ****

hello thank you for calling the brain service line
where we help you fix your mind in time for a rhyme
what can I do for you?

Yes thank you got taking my call
I'm flustered you see, I don't know what to do at all
see my brain and heart are on two different pages
I go from happy to lonely to flying onto irrelevant rages

Ohh yes we've been flooded with your problem lately
we don't have a solution that can work
Well can you give me advice?
Maybe...

I'd advise trying to focus on life itself
but my heart keeps desiring someone with which to build an empire of wealth
well I can't help you sir, but I wish you good luck
thanks ma'am, I'm gloomy as ****

You know what *****?
not having anything to write about because you're full of doubt about your life and the way it's going
when you have to consider giving it up to get those creative juices flowing

You know what *****?
when you're one of the few loyal mothafxckas out here but no one gives two fxcks
when your the type to buy your lady flowers but **** her in the car at her parents house
the type to compliment her blouse then rip it off when we get hot

you know what *****?
when one thing happens and your whole day is shot down the tubes and dead like Jimmy Hoffa got,
when you try to play to sweetness but get led on instead
when there's nothing but insecurity and loneliness residing in your head.

I am good enough to ****.

But not good enough to love.

I am good enough for now.

But not good enough for tomorrow.

Our generation normalizes casual ***.

We are "down to ****" after just one text.

Two consenting adults may not be wrong.

But it is beyond that night we must think on.

She may have felt beautiful for a moment.

He may have felt good for a second.

But tomorrow morning when she wakes up.

Tomorrow morning when he wakes up.

She will feel like she is trash.

He will know it wasn't meant to last.

It is emotionally damaging for the people involved.

So they seek more comfort thinking the pain will be solved.

Insecurity is like a disease.

And when spread among lovers it's harder to seize.

Soon enough we are a disease ridden youth,

Soon enough we must face the truth.

The world is a ****** up place

Humans are a fxcked up race.

So we met in a bookstore the other day
little did we know, we'd be seeing a bit more than grey
I walked into the ****** section, to buy the kama sutra
I bumped into you and our eyes locked for a moment, I swore that it was somewhere before I knew ya

You said that the book was getting you wet
I said "don't worry I think I can manage that without breaking a sweat,
intrigued we found a hidden spot in the store
And not too soon all that was heard was
**** YES! GIVE ME MORE!!!

So we had a fling right next to a bookshelf
we could've waited until we went to your place but we couldn't control ourselves
I guess as students of anatomy we need no help
That bookstore wasn't the same, considering what was on the shelf
;)

**** I crave you!

My thoughts and desires every ****** seconds and hour.

I wasn't expecting this. To feel this strongly towards you. More than physical, I hear you and see you everywhere intuitively.

A twinflame union?
Perhaps, I've been seeing signs of it everywhere,
I bare, standing six feet deep in strong tensions I feel.
I hold a deep personification to my heart.

A soul ******* love making strong passionate sensual sounds inside of me.

*** dripping off me ...
The smell lingers from your heat

Bite me

Fallen out of ***
      Drunk on lost luck
Needle takes another ***
       You're in my veins, you ****

It was the numbing kind of feeling

the feeling you get when the senses in your limbs when they’ve been starved of blood or oxygen

The kind where it prickles whenever you move

It was the kind of sensation
ghat was felt throughout the whole body

Not in one spot
Not in the general area
but so, like
it was everywhere
it felt like your whole body
was imploding with too little oxygen

****

But you don’t scream
nor shout

Nor a whisper will
pass your lips
just the shear horror
at why you even reacted at all….

looked forward to the future
possibly a family with you
took a min but i was opening up to you
saw a best friend in you
& a source of peace within you
tough love but i wanted to love you

then it all came crashing down
there i am looking like a clown
guess who’s more shut off now
not willing to trust anymore now
i was flying high till you shot me down
sad enough like the rest, you let me down

i now talk with the rain
cause that numbs my pain
cause when the sunshines, I’m not the same
**** love, it’s all a ***** game
such a shame
even with the liquor & poems to cope with
I’ll always hurt the same  - pencasso