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"chafes" poems
Another year gone, leaving everywhere its rich spiced residues: vines, leaves, the uneaten fruits crumbling damply in the shadows, unmattering back from the particular island of this summer, this NOW, that now is nowhere except underfoot, moldering in that black subterranean castle of unobservable mysteries - roots and sealed seeds and the wanderings of water. This I try to remember when time's measure painfully chafes, for instance when autumn flares out at the last, boisterous and like us longing to stay - how everything lives, shifting from one bright vision to another, forever in these momentary pastures.
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Fall Song
122 A something in a summer’s Day As slow her flambeaux burn away Which solemnizes me. A something in a summer’s noon— A depth—an Azure—a perfume— Transcending ecstasy. And still within a summer’s night A something so transporting bright I clap my hands to see— Then veil my too inspecting face Lets such a subtle—shimmering grace Flutter too far for me— The wizard fingers never rest— The purple brook within the breast Still chafes it narrow bed— Still rears the East her amber Flag— Guides still the sun along the Crag His Caravan of Red— So looking on—the night—the morn Conclude the wonder gay— And I meet, coming thro’ the dews Another summer’s Day!
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A something in a summer’s Day
Sure the fatigue would come... Infiltrating the sanctity of our skin, gripping our muscles and chafes us within. Right down to the bone. No doubt the fear of future days would eat at us raw. It would gnaw at our minds... Debilitating thoughts that would ******* no one else but our own. Of course the seeds we've planted, mightn't see past the layer of soil in which they're embedded. Seeds hidden in the ground for future reaping... They mightn't flourish to meet the harvest and greet the hand which would welcome them full grown. Most likely the days before us only show of dark clouds... That constantly scare us. But today... Has time and space for us to exist. Today has a crisp sweetness wafting through the air. Firm, unwavering ground beneath our feet. So let's claim today because today is ours to keep. Today we share the returns... Of the sweat and the tears that in the past we've sown.
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Dec 24, 2015
Dec 24, 2015 at 11:40 AM UTC
Carpe Diem
a polar vortex swirls eastward on Siberian Tiger paws bounding over Appalachian Highlands gobbling geography gelling Great Lakes spawning Erie blizzards sculpting Wabash ice floes clogging commerce all along the Ohio River Valley this voracious juggernaut’s wide maw bears icicle teeth laughing as it swallows Pittsburgh, Little Philly, and a Big Apple, before gorging itself on generous portions ladled into simmering crocks of steaming Boston Baked Beans growling blue arctic air blasts roar bursts pipes savages the heat of blasting furnaces, bubbling boilers, hot belly stoves frantically drinking oil, flaming gas burning wood and burping soot the blistering jet stream claws screech a slashing stratospheric hum as Frigidaire blasts swallows breath brittles limbs chafes cheeks gnaws earlobes crystallizes tears nibbles nostrils cubes snot numbs toes bites digits diving sub zero gradient subdues batteries to deaden states delays buses derails trains cuts power constricts veins preys on vagabonds and animals get the homeless off the street! bring the animals in check on your elderly neighbors don’t get caught outside and shut the **** door! do you own stock in the Public Service? beware the polar vortex and next months heating bill Sonny Boy Williamson & Otis Spann Nine Below Zero Oakland 1/6/14 jbm
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Jan 6, 2014
Jan 6, 2014 at 2:43 PM UTC
Polar Vortex
Every hour of every day, In some clichéd way, I think of you At least twice. I’m a friend, I know. You say it too much, It chafes me raw. Are you really that dense?   Or maybe it’s a ruse, A system you’ve devised To keep me at bay, Because you just don’t feel The same way. I’m crazy about you, I admit, If you saw me now, You’d recognize the guilt, Brightly scrawled across my face, Like a neon sign: The coffee, the talks, the long walks? All excuses, Preambles for profound, passionate ********** That never materialized. I don’t think it ever will. Adieu!  Farewell my friend,   I wish you all of life’s best, I’ll cross the sea to forget you and rest, Sail somewhere faraway, Like Portugal or Paraguay. Then, On a lonely afternoon, You’ll phone for yet Another friendly talk, Expecting me – your anchor, your rock,   Steam will blow out your ears hissing: ‘She is missing!  She is missing!’ Will you sigh and say, ‘Ah!  My Love has gone away’?
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Nov 23, 2013
Nov 23, 2013 at 3:05 PM UTC
Jim II
If the universe is expanding and All is in flight from the center outwards, If what is close soon shall be far; If all is slowing by miniscule degrees Until the whole **** lot is frozen; If every thriving life will cool; if I am Mistaken and you are not the fool I hoped you were; if you are; If, in the vast ending of this story, It is not the plot but the syntax That chafes against you; If you are a mad creature, A dissonance in the hum, If you can be defined by your name, And you think there is anything to be gained In your coming to the front lines, If you think you can slow the creeping cold Of mumbled words and sideways glances, If you will not be cowed or numbed - Gather your things, say your goodbyes And come.
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Jun 8, 2011
Jun 8, 2011 at 2:15 AM UTC
Blue Shift
Sweat and rubber Chafes against my toes Polish chipped like a porcelain doll Hurling juvenile patter around Like drops of sweet rain Cooling the smouldering tirade Flying on horseback Wind twirling non-existing Scalding coils spurt up limbs Bubbling out in incandescent mirth Linking and tripping Stumbling doggedly along Ridged gelatinous arcs Superior to the first incline Propelling ever up
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Jul 5, 2015
Jul 5, 2015 at 6:46 AM UTC
Bouncy Castle
An army of little girls poke dandelions through the skin of every man who could hurt them. Blades in a briefcase, hide several between their legs until the wetness chafes her right where the dark funnels stop. The big people and his crosses – armpits made of porcelain then dug into little girl gardens, a meadow of dandelions scrawled: we do not give you ourselves but we will give you our blood. Their masculine fingers could not win, too harsh for bald skinned little girls.
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Mar 17, 2013
Mar 17, 2013 at 6:14 PM UTC
grass blades
cure yourself by finding another boy, one who wants to hold your fingers as you lose yourself in flaxen starlights. cure yourself by singing until your throat chafes like sandpaper. cure yourself by telling yourself that you are the moon, and the moon is you, and she is laughing with you, shining for you, waiting for you to glimmer. cure yourself by finding the right people, the ones who grasp you with splintered paws and souls searching for whatever tastes like bubblegum. darling, you won’t be cured right away, take it day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, don’t forget to watch the sun rise, to smell the coffee with shaky fingers. cure yourself by watching the cream dance with the shadows. bruises are only temporary.
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Nov 23, 2013
Nov 23, 2013 at 12:05 AM UTC
starry
In times when the heart is lodged somewhere between the brain and the throat I try to force it back down to its chambers, before I choke, or before it strangles my head's precious, antagonized gland. There's only one way to avoid certain tragedy, and that's to look, feel, taste. It's either make mental tracks- run and jump- or drown. It's at these moments when I start playing tricks on my mind. Doing this is easier than you may think. Just stop all thought, for the mind's constant churning chafes the heart. Now, allow your hungry eyes to sidle to and fro- let them wander- dare to wonder about what hasn't, but don't idle even for a minute on what has, or what couldn't. As long as you can avoid relapse, you might even venture into what could, as long as it's new and fresh. As long as it isn't some woeful inquiry growing stale since last night. Then once you find yourself daydreaming, or better yet, DOING, you are halfway there. You've made it uphill and only need to coast down- down the lovely unkempt slope of impulse without crashing. Do something new, preferrably silly- stay away from dangerous- go somewhere new, talk to a stranger, eat something expensive, drink a little, burp loudly. Go wild, steer away from crazy, but cruise through hilarity. Bombard yourself with creative juices, **** your phone, bury your watch, put on your shoes and let yourself laugh. Once you've had some laughs, cue up some Planet Earth -Kung Fu's good too- roll a joint. Smoke it. Grab a pizza, fall asleep with the television on then wake up with a smile on your face. Trust me, it won't come off in the shower, and trust me your heart's ok. You're gonna be just fine.
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Jul 26, 2012
Jul 26, 2012 at 12:14 PM UTC
How to play tricks on your mind
In times when the heart is lodged somewhere between the brain and the throat I try to force it back down to its chambers, before I choke, or before it strangles my head's precious, antagonized gland. There's only one way to avoid certain tragedy, and that's to look, feel, taste. It's either make mental tracks- run and jump- or drown. It's at these moments when I start playing tricks on my mind. Doing this is easier than you may think. Just stop all thought, for the mind's constant churning chafes the heart. Now, allow your hungry eyes to sidle to and fro- let them wander- dare to wonder about what hasn't, but don't idle even for a minute on what has, or what couldn't. As long as you can avoid relapse, you might even venture into what could, as long as it's new and fresh. As long as it isn't some woeful inquiry growing stale since last night. Then once you find yourself daydreaming, or better yet, DOING, you are halfway there. You've made it uphill and only need to coast down- down the lovely unkempt slope of impulse without crashing. Do something new, preferrably silly- stay away from dangerous- go somewhere new, talk to a stranger, eat something expensive, drink a little, burp loudly. Go wild, steer away from crazy, but cruise through hilarity. Bombard yourself with creative juices, **** your phone, bury your watch, put on your shoes and let yourself laugh. Once you've had some laughs, cue up some Planet Earth -Kung Fu's good too- roll a joint. Smoke it. Grab a pizza, fall asleep with the television on then wake up with a smile on your face. Trust me, it won't come off in the shower, and trust me your heart's ok. You're gonna be just fine.
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I tread on the tightrope Suspended between thinking too little And thinking too much I balance precariously Tiptoeing towards optimism But humanity sways me And I shakily creep Towards despair The costume chafes There is not enough chalk on my shoe The lights are too bright And a pearly bead of self-awareness Trickles past my temple And drips on the dirt baseness A thousand feet below And yet-- The crowd smiles And gasps And cheers And claps And I am reminded That everything Is a show So I smile And I bow With a flourish And I soak in the adoration And try to forget That the struggle repeats Each night In each town But the show can And does Go on
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Oct 3, 2014
Oct 3, 2014 at 5:41 PM UTC
The Balancing Act
strip me of the defenses i wear to protect myself from the cold shoulders, the wicked stares slip the armor from my speech and reassure me that i do not need it here, past the judgment of the daytime take the stony demeanor from where it chafes against my soft skin- let it lay, discarded, on the floor with my guardedness, my cynicism let me be the angel i have learned to smother let me spread my wings without bruising them on mankind's abrasive habits here, where sin is not forgiven but rather accepted have me whole and nothing more with no more negative space- in this room, mold me, with accepting hands, into what i always was into something small, something honest, something trusting let me let my guard down
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Mar 20, 2013
Mar 20, 2013 at 7:39 PM UTC
misanthrope
Once again I’ll blame the weather that I can’t get it all together and wrap the tethered, skimpy shawl of concentration around my mind Frustration penetrates in the wind and chafes away with hourglass Time - who falling tactless through the illusion tries to                          b                              u                Me                                      r                                  alive.                               y
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Jun 26, 2013
Jun 26, 2013 at 1:58 AM UTC
Weather or not I blame you
genius is snapping at my dragons. feel free to ask them. they’ll barter hard tongues and won't apologize for mad hatters. but this. This matters. it ungathers. It unravels and the sunscape chafes on the void's tatters. but it rathers you know me now, than meet me at crossroads. it's your call. come from your unexamined life and be sitting with your eyes like two mouths. they will speak when spoken two; when i give you all... and you want me too. hello. my name is unsung. and That's the song. don't get me wrong; but right your vessel - and this ocean will float your devils with your nephelim. with your unbridled elan. be sweet. keep your feet unplanted, but be enchanted by the road you're on. find me in the thicket of unbearable seeing. you will be me - for the moment you release ' things ' and imprison Nothing. of course you'll need a cauldron to rehearse your heresies as often. may i suggest a new guess ? a question that suits you better than " what the **** ? " and has feathers ? can we do that and love each other ?
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May 28, 2013
May 28, 2013 at 8:07 PM UTC
GENIUS IS SNAPPING AT MY DRAGONS
Sigh I wish he was here Sigh He won't leave I fear Sigh You wont believe what was said Sigh It's easy to slander the dead Sigh What it is to be warm Sigh To feel without scorn Sigh The need to be safe Sigh An embrace that chafes Sigh Where are we now Sigh No feilds to plow Sigh Wrap yours arms around me Sigh We'll be what we want to be Laugh Happieness, a piece Laugh Freedom of release
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Jul 6, 2012
Jul 6, 2012 at 6:10 PM UTC
Sigh
We're taught to move on, To be strong! Shake it off, champ! You'll get 'em next time! Except this isn't a ******* baseball game is it? These losses aren't ephemeral, And loving the ghost of someone, Is like dragging a cinder block Tied around your neck Your delicate skin chafes, tears and bleeds, And as you gag, Perhaps you wish you'd find yourself In a lake with that cinder block Gurgling, staring eyes wide At the block to do something! Haven't you loved it so? Bubbles rise. Fade to black and remember Your thankless love, Remember how you held this torch, And became a martyr for no one
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Oct 4, 2014
Oct 4, 2014 at 9:22 AM UTC
Martyr
The wistful wind tugs at me, Willing me to come out and play. I can see it tickling the barren November branches, See its aftermath in the chaos of crunchy leaves. Cotton-tail clouds yield before it, And it wriggles into the core of flustered students, Who flee from it and clasp their jackets more tightly about them. I embrace the breeze, its chill enveloping and ensnaring me. It brings moisture to my eyes and chafes my chapping lips, Yet it is within this maelstrom that I am reminded of my own vitality. I am hyper-aware of my own temperature, 98.6 in stark contrast to its harsh ice. I can feel my blood pumping sluggishly, Steadily, beneath my fragile skin. I am reminded of my own mortality. The pulse could cease, And the universe would not stop its song. The fish would stay in rhythm and harmony, And there would still be new life and beauty. A sobering thought, but freeing as well. I am not the center, not even close.
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Jun 6, 2013
Jun 6, 2013 at 7:10 PM UTC
Musings of a Blustery Day
In my own skin, I fit like a glove. In my own skin, I look as I always have. In my own skin, I look in the mirror And see someone unfamiliar. I slip into my skin, And it irritates my entire being. I slip into my skin, And I feel like I’m sinking. I slip into my skin, And for so long I wriggle In order to lessen the struggle. I move in my skin, And the material chafes all over. I move in my skin, And the resistance grows stronger. I move in my skin, And it doesn’t seem changed at all To those who don’t look and never see me fall. In my own skin, I fit like a glove. In my own skin, I look as I always have. In my own skin, I’m screaming for my life, and no one’s here to listen.
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May 2, 2010
May 2, 2010 at 6:43 PM UTC
In My Own Skin
Sometimes When the moon is up I think of you, More Than when it isn't. Out of a sense of fear More so Than anything else. A security blanket. Under that blanket We'll hide. You'll reach far down  near me and Touch glazed candies and Pull away shy, because you don't understand why you did. We'll bury ourselves deeper into the Fabric squares our families made us into. We'll make ourselves comfortable to the texture and the sounds they make When it chafes our skin and nails. The doors will open, hallway lights will prey on the dark and We'll snicker rubbing our toes together.
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Jun 29, 2013
Jun 29, 2013 at 5:27 AM UTC
Quilted
the crust on the bread we break chafes the palm homely as we twist the loaf of our repast releasing the heat of hot embers growling in the brick womb of our rustic ovens... crumbling aglow, after the dough has risen like a Christ to a crisp. long after the yeast has spat hollows in the flesh of our sour toast. it burns unburdened beneath a barren grill, inconsolable. croaking smoke and ash. pitching cinders up the plume Promethean. it is the morning. so our wolves will have their rabbits as our pendulums, our mortality. but the feast is not our bread... it's the crumbs.
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Apr 20, 2015
Apr 20, 2015 at 7:57 AM UTC
PENDULUMS AND RABBITS
In this chair is where I'll be, It is where I will be when I write the grandest novel. In this chair is where I'll be, It is where I will string together the most magnificent predicate, I will sow my words to make the most wonderful sentences. In this chair is where I'll be when I watch it all come together, A Voyer to the construction of a spider web of fiction, Spun so gracefully. It is a lot to behold in such a chair, a chair in which chafes the fringe of my buttocks. A chair that wails. It is very old, and its cracks are showing, for after all it is little more than a dying tree, mutilated for our comfort, though, it has become my own discomfort, In this chair is where I will be, When I purchase a new Chair, and the that is where I will be......
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Mar 18, 2017
Mar 18, 2017 at 3:45 PM UTC
In This Chair
I saw a picture of you today And I thought, "You are the most beautiful person I've ever SEEN." It took my breath away. I love you. I am in love with you. When I am in your arms Nothing else matters. When I see your face I melt with joy. When I think of you My soul glows with awe. But darling I know I am okay, underneath all that desperate love. I know I am. Somehow. There's a bit of something there That never was before, Something solid. I am so glad That sometimes I have a lucid moment Within the insanity of loving you. Not- Never!- When you are next to me, For then I can't imagine even breathing without being near you. But when you are absent, When you are absent Sometimes I am not sad And I'm thankful I've discovered the duality Of worshiping you And enjoying my life without you always in it. And it's not perfect- I've spent a lifetime fearing this change. My life has said to me, "To let go is to forget, and to forget is to lose everything. To trust is to be unprepared for damage. To breathe is to allow a weakness you can't afford." There are many many moments when your silence Chafes at my wrists like rope, When I panic, drowning in the loss of you Even though I know it isn't a permanent one. But... There are many moments, also When I think of you and smile Even though I know you are not thinking of me And that Frankly Is much more progress than it seems like. That is more faith and calm than I've ever been able to offer someone I'd bring down the stars for. I am working for this.
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Dec 11, 2013
Dec 11, 2013 at 12:15 AM UTC
The Calm Inside The Storm
I saw a picture of you today And I thought, "You are the most beautiful person I've ever SEEN." It took my breath away. I love you. I am in love with you. When I am in your arms Nothing else matters. When I see your face I melt with joy. When I think of you My soul glows with awe. But darling I know I am okay, underneath all that desperate love. I know I am. Somehow. There's a bit of something there That never was before, Something solid. I am so glad That sometimes I have a lucid moment Within the insanity of loving you. Not- Never!- When you are next to me, For then I can't imagine even breathing without being near you. But when you are absent, When you are absent Sometimes I am not sad And I'm thankful I've discovered the duality Of worshiping you And enjoying my life without you always in it. And it's not perfect- I've spent a lifetime fearing this change. My life has said to me, "To let go is to forget, and to forget is to lose everything. To trust is to be unprepared for damage. To breathe is to allow a weakness you can't afford." There are many many moments when your silence Chafes at my wrists like rope, When I panic, drowning in the loss of you Even though I know it isn't a permanent one. But... There are many moments, also When I think of you and smile Even though I know you are not thinking of me And that Frankly Is much more progress than it seems like. That is more faith and calm than I've ever been able to offer someone I'd bring down the stars for. I am working for this.
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Greyblue overwhelms my eyes as fog and cloud covers the sand Stretching beside me I step forth, leaving family behind Lost in wonder. Salt intoxicates, tempts my nostrils Enticing my feet forward The coarse sand grows soft As it greets the water, Melting at its touch - my toes relish the taste- Natural Water rushing around me Below me Through me Rising as I willingly sink in The endless ocean hypnotizing me Like the sirens it holds, singing to The voyager within A voice, now not so sweet Stern, concerned, worried, -motherly- Calling me back, forming Crossroads to my young mind Amphibious A tadpole Drawn between reality and - safety? Pulled back The sand chafes my skin As I walk back to the world I know so well, And the future that remains a stranger.
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Jul 9, 2011
Jul 9, 2011 at 11:54 AM UTC
memory
You need to go. And I don't know how to do it. I don't want to forget you, to cut you off. I don't want to shatter my love for you. There has to be another way. But... you need to go. I can't keep waking up sore every morning. Raw. I can't keep talking myself out of tears. I can't keep wondering why the hell you matter to me, and abusing myself for caring about you. But I don't know how to do it. It's not in me to extinguish a love. I have sacrificed every part of myself at least once to avoid it. It has been the single thing I am unwilling to do. The one unwavering line in the sand. And I know where this leads- this trying to erase it. I know because I've tried, In pain, In desperation, to destroy a love before. And I couldn't do it. I threw more and more at it, unleashed every weapon I had. And by the end... I had caught the rest of me in the crossfire, and the only thing that remained untouched was that love. You need to go. But that will happen again if I try to uproot you from my soul. It is a humbling lot. A prideless realization. That I must wait. That I must serve the part of me that holds me captive, the only part of me I know as indestructible, The part that reigns because nothing can dethrone it. I must bow to it, because I like what else I am. I know that even if I tried with every ounce of courage and hatred I have built up over my years to demolish my love for you, the dust would clear, And it would be the only thing about me left. And I don't want it to be. I don't respect it enough to let it be my defining factor. And so I sit and stew and wait, for it to loosen its stranglehold, or for you to come back. It is a prideless thing. And I am a proud person. And it chafes every single day. And I swallow it, and go on.
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Jan 17, 2015
Jan 17, 2015 at 1:38 PM UTC
Crushed
You need to go. And I don't know how to do it. I don't want to forget you, to cut you off. I don't want to shatter my love for you. There has to be another way. But... you need to go. I can't keep waking up sore every morning. Raw. I can't keep talking myself out of tears. I can't keep wondering why the hell you matter to me, and abusing myself for caring about you. But I don't know how to do it. It's not in me to extinguish a love. I have sacrificed every part of myself at least once to avoid it. It has been the single thing I am unwilling to do. The one unwavering line in the sand. And I know where this leads- this trying to erase it. I know because I've tried, In pain, In desperation, to destroy a love before. And I couldn't do it. I threw more and more at it, unleashed every weapon I had. And by the end... I had caught the rest of me in the crossfire, and the only thing that remained untouched was that love. You need to go. But that will happen again if I try to uproot you from my soul. It is a humbling lot. A prideless realization. That I must wait. That I must serve the part of me that holds me captive, the only part of me I know as indestructible, The part that reigns because nothing can dethrone it. I must bow to it, because I like what else I am. I know that even if I tried with every ounce of courage and hatred I have built up over my years to demolish my love for you, the dust would clear, And it would be the only thing about me left. And I don't want it to be. I don't respect it enough to let it be my defining factor. And so I sit and stew and wait, for it to loosen its stranglehold, or for you to come back. It is a prideless thing. And I am a proud person. And it chafes every single day. And I swallow it, and go on.
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The eventual "later"; come and gone, why haven't I heard back from either one? I left myself open to keep them safe, to be taken advantage; leaving chafes. Protecting and returning by their side, thrown, tossed around and asked to abide. Abused and used to find their happiness, left alone with your thoughts in the darkness.
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May 9, 2015
May 9, 2015 at 3:12 PM UTC
Later