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jennifer ann Jan 2015
the girls had been chattering and laughing in the dining room when suddenly nan, zoey, and madison charged in the room. making everyone stop and look at them. "Alright *******." Madison stood with her arms crossed and an enraged look in her dark brown eyes. "who the **** stole my money???" she questioned. the girls just sat there and looked at her quietly. "okay, none of you broke *** hos want to fess up? you're ballsy enough to take my **** but you're not ballsy enough to stand up to me? i see" Madison shouted. sadness and hostility in her eyes and voice.
"who took Madisons money? i wanna know right now!" Cassie stood up in anger. quickly rushing to Madisons aid. Madison nudged her alittle and rolled her eyes. Cassie folded her arms, mimicking exactly what Madison had been doing. "BROKE ***!!! HOESSSS!" Cassie screamed, pointing at all the girls. Pyper rolled her big blue eyes and flipped her long crimson red hair laughing, "nobody stole your money you idiot, you probably just misplaced it." she laughed, fearlessly looking madison straight in the eyes. which made nan look at  pyper very suspiciously as she read her mind. "hold my earrings please." Madison began to put her hair up in a bun. "what is going on in here?" Cordelia stormed in the room with her arms folded. "put your shoes on Madison." Cordelia looked at Madison in confusion. "nothing, Madisons spazing out because she thinks that someone took her money. and now she's getting all 'ghetto' and bent out of shape about it. taking her payless heels off like she's actually going to do something." pyper rolled her eyes and joked, making the rest of the girls laugh aswell. "payless? i only wear chanel." Madison flipped her hair. Nan looked Pyper in the eyes suspiciously, shaking her head from side to side. "i'm going to say this once and once only." cordelia shouted. "i will not have any fighting or steeling in this house. and if anyone is caught fighting or steeling, you will be expelled. it's a big bad world out there girls, up until now you've all lived very sheltered lives and i'd hate to send you out in it to fend for yourselves." Cordelia sighed. pyper got a very sad look in her eyes. "sheltered" she snickered, "right."
Nan looked at pyper sadly, still reading her mind.
"what are you looking at?" Pyper shouted at nan viciously.
"i'm not sure yet." Nan replied curiously.
Tom McCone Mar 2014
dunedin. friday, three, afternoon.
set from home under a blue sky
with full& prepared pack,
a somewhat empty stomach,
and a necessity to get away from the city.
hiking boots tread asphalt down to the depot,
where, in thirty-seven minutes punctuated
by plastic seats grafted to a wall
and a mildly disjunct group of small or
big-time travellers, the naked bus
pulled in, a hematite centipede
crawling into the lot. it was a bus,
no complaints. all others' bags
stowed, twenty seven bucks outta pocket
and swung into the front-right-window seat,
bid a farewell to the beat-down
pub across the road and onto the one-way
merging into a highway and outta
town the dark bug skittered, on
schedule or something resembling it.
behind the driver, the sun came through
around the beam in the window. warm patterns
laid on skin, the countryside's broad expanse:

cylindrical bales of hay scattered about
paddocks, dark late-autumn florets of flax
on roadsides, plumes of white smoke from
bonfires in townships as small as a thumbnail,
hedgelines of eucalyptus, pine; russet streaks
through bark of single gum trees stood
off-centre in fields. sticky-wooded hillsides
punctured by fire breaks roll almost forever
and back. the rushing sound of passing cars
through the 3/4-golden ratio of the driver's
ajar window; twenty-first century mansions
verging on out-of-place. saplings emerging,
bracketed, through verdant grass patches.
museum abbatoirs. toitoi like hen's plumage
lining drainage ditches. another Elizabeth st-
(how many could be counted out by now?) tidy
front yards and milton liquorland through this
small town. an everpresent tilting sun. fields
of flowered nettle. s-bends through pancake layers
of hills. a delapidated gravel quarry at stony
creek. deer farms, sheep farms, bovine farms, alpaca
farms (favourite); another bonfire seen down a
long gulley; a power substation, all organized
tangles. a two-four 300m before the bridge into


balclutha. 4.40pm.
across the road into the i-site
two friendly ladies circle locations
to make (got a car) or try to make (on foot),
offering a ride in half an hour,
leave it to chance.
across another road, drifter's emporium
(that's the name, no joke) got a knife
to open up cans- bought no cans, brought
no cans, still nice to have one anyway.
down the road, 200ml from unichem, waste
no time, turn ninety degrees, cross a
railway, then outta town in a sec. first
photo: half highway, half clutha river. fine
shot. sit down, watch the water couple mins,
head down the road. red-black ferns radiate
under willows down the riverbank. metal
bumper-bars keep legs on, the road rolls
gentle turns, diverges from the river. stick
to the former, faster that way. no intentions
of hitching. just wanna walk. and walk. and
walk. guy yells out a car window. envy,
likely. who cares. apple tree hangs over
a dry ditch. pick a small one, gone in
a minute. probably ain't sprayed. been
eating ice-cream dinners more often'n
not the last coupla weeks- isn't much
the stomach won't or can't handle anymore,
anyway.

odours of decay from the freezing works.
seagulls sound out nearby.
typical.

down the road, the reek of death fades
out. back to grass. sit in some of the
tall stuff, under a spindly tree. put down
some ink, a handful of asst. nuts. 'bout
thirteen fingers of daylight left. no idea
if the coast is further than that. little
care. down the road the land flattens out,
decent sign. the junction was a fair bit
past reckoned, though. flipped a chunk
of bark (too lazy to get a coin out) to
figure whether the coast was worth it. bark
said no, went out anyway. gotta see the sea,
keeps you sane. past a lush native
acre or two- some lucky ******'s front lawn-
changed mentality, slung out a thumb (first
time). beginner's luck, kid straight outta
seventh form pulls over in a mustard-yellow
*******' kinda beach-van. was headin' out
to the coast, funnily enough. had been up
in raglan (surf central, nz), back down with
the 'rents now, though. out kaka point, only
one of his age, he reckoned, no schoolhouse
there, just olds. was going to surf academy,
pretty apt. little envious.

the plains spread out and out, ocean just
rose up out of a field. there's nothing
more perfect. gentle waves stroke the sands,
houses stare intently out at the mingling of
blues. one cloud hovers so far away it doesn't
even exist. down the other end of kaka point,
back on solid ground, walking into a gorge, laments
about not choosing the coastal route. but owaka
is the new destination, bout 11ks, give or take
(5ks later, sign says another 15.. some give). nothing
coulda beat that sight anyway, stepping outta
a van onto that pristine beach.

entry: gorge route to owaka. seven.
late light painted the tops of hills absolute
gold. thought maybe this way ain't so bad. beside a
converging valley, phone got enough reception
for dad to get through. said in balclutha coulda
got a room with a colleague. too far out now. lost
him in the middle of a sentence about camera film.
surprised to have even got that far. road wound
troughlike through the bottom of the gorge, became
parallel to a cute little stream. climbed down chickenwire
holding the road in place, ****** in it (had to).
clambered back up, continued walking as the occasional
campervan rolled on by. took a photo of the sun perched
on a hilltop, sent it to mel. dunno why. anxieties
over the perfect sunrise picture came frequently,
a goal become turmoil. the gorge flattened out,
and soon in countryside my fears allayed. round
a corner in picturesque nowhere, found my shot.
sat in long grass. stole it. sighed. ate a handful
of nuts. moved on. {about eight}

dark consumed the surrounding gentle-rolling hills,
nowhere near owaka, which was probably the tiny bundle
of lights nestling a little below the foot of a
mountain in the distance (not too far off, in
reality). near the turnoff to surat bay (was heading
there, plans change) a ute honks. taken as friendly.
a right turn instead of a left, farmsteads lit
up in fireplace tones, the sound cows make at
dusk. it got colder. would one jersey be sufficient?
hoepfully. stars began pinpricking the royal blues of the
night sky in its opening hues. eight-fourty-ish slugged
back about 3/4 of the syrup, along with half of a box
of fruit medley (so **** delicious), in light of dull
calf aches becoming increasingly apparent. needed
to walk a helluva lot more. ain't one for lettin'
nothing get in the way of that. lights in the distance
became the entry sign for a camp-site. no interest,
head on. past another farmhouse, stars came out in
packs. three cows upon a slight hilltop. next junction
pulled left a good eighty degrees and was on the
straight to owaka. less than two minutes later,
a dog-ute pulled to a halt and offers up a ride down
most of the stretch. didn't say no.

still stable, as two pig-hunters tell
of their drive back from picking up a couple
pig-dogs somewhere north. they were heading
out bush to shoot, thought they'd seen
another guy they'd picked up a couple weeks
ago, who'd taken 'em out somewhere they
couldn't remember. paranoia grips, but
the lads are fairly innocuous. they say it's
dangerous out here, gotta be ballsy walking
middle of the night, no gun, no dog,
all by yourself. wasn't worried, got nothing
to lose anyway (still, this sets helluva
mood). by a turnoff a k outta owaka, dropped
off. said probably all that'll be open there
is a pub, if that. bid luck and set their way.
above, the whole sky is covered with shining
glitter. down a dip and turn, **** in the
middle of the road. an ominous sign indicating
the outskirts of

owaka. approximately 9.40pm

my head loosens as i approach. the lights
form across a small valley i can't verify
exists or not between dog barks i mistake
for the yells of drunkards and lights
pirouetting from cars behind me. i slow
down i don't want to do this.

owaka is terrifying. plastic.

the street corners thud like cardboard. i
walk past a garden of teapots, a computer
screen inside the house glares through the
window pane bending breathing outward. there
is nobody here, still there is a feeling
like there's people everywhere, flocking
in shadows. a silhouette moving in a
distant cafe doorway. the sound of teeth,
of darkness fallen. thick russian tones
sound from a shelf of a motel. eyes
everywhere, mostly mine. i stop only round
a bend and down near a police station, yet
feeling no more safe, sitting in a gutter to
send mel my plans, to tell myself my plans.
i want to be nowhere again. i am soon nowhere.


out of breath, out the other end of owaka,
the sick streetlights fade into comforting
dark nestled between bunches of indistinct
treelines. the feeling of safety lasts but
twenty minutes, where another dip in the
road leads through a patch of bush, in which
gunshots ring periodically and laughter and
barking rings through. breaking down, it takes
five minutes to resolve and keep going. ain't
got nothing to lose, anyway. boots squeak like
diseased hinges all down the road. hadn't
noticed beforehand, the only thing noticed
now. an impending doom hangs thick like fog,
the thought of being strung up like an
underweight hog. walking faster and
not much quieter, the other side of the
bush couldn't have come sooner. the fear
lasts until the gunshots are distant nothing.
still alive, still out of breath, still
fairly ****** up, there's no comfort like the
sound of nothing but the occasional insect's
chirp. vestiges of still water came around
a corner and just kept coming as the golden
moon sung serenity all over. finally, a peace
came to rest over the landscape. sitting by
the road with a clear view of the moon's light
sheathed in the waters, the stars above wreath
a cirrus eye to watch over the marshland
plants leading into the placid waters of

catlins lake, west. ten fifty-one.
crossing a one-way bridge over a river winding
its way into the lake, another turning point
decision arose: continue down the highway
along the river, or head straight out and
toward the coast again. having resolved to
make it to a waterfall by dawn, and the latter
offering a possibility of this, the decision
made itself. turning back around the other side
of the lake, the road wound a couple times
up a gentle ***** out and up from the valley
at the tail of the lake, and into a slightly
more elevated valley. the country roads ran
easily and smooth, paved roughly but solid.
not a car came by for kilometers at a time.
lay on the road past a turnoff for quarter
of an hour letting serenity wash over, the
hills miniscule in comparison to home, the
sky motionless, massive thin halo about the
moon. walking on, night-birds called from
time to time (no moreporks, though. not until
dawn), figuring out how to whistle them back.
a turnoff to purakaunui bay strongly
considered and ultimately ignored; retrospectively
a great call, considering the size of the detour.
hedgerows of macrocarpa, limbs clearly cut
haphazard where once they'd hung over the
road. occasional 4wd passing, always a 4wd,
be it flash new or trusty old. you'd need
one out here. have no fun, otherwise.
monolithic pine-ish hedge bushes, squatting
giants. once, a glimmering in the sky, a
plane from queenstown (assumedly) almost
way too far to make out. the colossus of
the one human-shaped shadow cast down
from the moon to my boots. how small
a thing in this place. swamped out by
the beauty of this neverending valley.
breathless.

the road turned, not quite a hairpin,
but not entirely bluntly, a welcome
break from the straight or gentle
sway, and five minutes turned to dirt.
had to lay down again- legs screaming
by this point for rest. still, they
had nothing against pressing on. dad
taught me to just keep going. that's
the thing about walking. stop for a
little bit and you're good to go
again. pushing for the fall was probably
overkill, but no worry now. dirt road
felt so right after a good 20+ks of
asphalt, only infrequently punctuated
by roadside moss or thin grass. it
was as if beginning again (well,
kinda, if only with as much energy).
having downed only a litre of water
(leaving only half a litre more), a
litre of fruit juice and about 100
grams of assorted nuts since more
than twelve hours ago by this point,
it should have been a shock to
still be going by this point. don't
really need that much anyway, though.
gone on less for longer. hydration,
anyway, was the least of all worries,
the air being thick with water, ground
fog having been laid down hours ago.

up the dirt track, more cows. they make strange
sounds at night. didn't know anything yet,
though. that's still to come. a ute swang past
going the other way, indiscriminate hollers
from the passenger-side window. waved back
cheerily. so far from anything to be anything
but upbeat now. not even the heavy shroud of
tiredness could touch that, yet. the track wound
on forever. was stopping every half-kilometer
to stand and stretch, warding off the oncoming
aches. the onset was unwieldy, though. didn't
have long. past a B&B;, wondered whether anyone
actually ever stayed there (surely would, who'd
not revisit this place over and over once they'd
discovered it?)- certainly would've, having the
cash (apparently parts of "lion, witch and the
wardrobe" were filmed here. huh). further on, the
road turned back to seal, unfortunately, but
with small promise- surely, at least fairly
close by this point. turning a corner, a small
and infinitely beautiful indent against the bush,
a small paddock bunched up against it, stream
wound against the bases of trees, all lit by
the clear tones of a now unswathed moon, sat
aside the road. it was distilled perfection.
it was too much, just had to keep goin' or
risk shattering that image. next turn was
a set of DOC toilets, an excellent sign. must be
basically sitting on the path entry now. searched
all 'round the back for it, up the road, nothing.
not entirely despondent but bewildered, moved
forward and found a signpost. the falls were now
behind? turned around and searched even more
thoroughly, quiet hope turning to desperation
by the silent light of the moon. finally,
straight across the road from the toilets,
was the green and gold sign, cloaked in
darkness under clustering trees, professing
a ten-minute bushwalk to the

purakaunui falls. saturday. 1.32 am.**
venturing into the bush by the dull light
of a screen of a dying phone, the breeze
made small movements through the canopy. it
couldn't have been any more tranquil. edging
way through the winding cliffish track through
dense brush, the sound of a trickling stream
engorged into a lush symphony of water. crossing
a single-sided bridge across an unseeable chasm,
twinkling from the ferns behind became apparent.
turning off the dull light, the tiny neon bulbs of
glow-worms littered the dirt wall risen up about
half a metre, where the track had been cut out.
my heart soared. all heights of beauty come
together. continuing down the path, glow-worms
litter the surroundings and the rushing of
water comes to a roar. at a look-out platform
above the falls, nothing can be seen save a
slight glisten. down perilous steps (wouldn't
be too bad if you could actually see 'em) the
final viewing platform lay at level with the
bottom of the falls. they stood like a statue
in the dark, winding trails of thin white wash
through the shadows hung under trees. left
speechless from something hardly made out, turned
around and back up the stairs to where the
glowing dots seemed their most concentrated.
into the ferns above, clambered through and
around moss-painted tree trunks and came to rest
a couple hundred metres from the trail, under
a fern, under a rata. packed everything but
a blanket from nan into the bag, laid it out
on curled leaf litter and folded up into it,
feet too sore to remove 'em from boots, curling
knees up into the blanket and tucking a hand
between 'em to keep it warm. only face and
ankles exposed, watched the moon's light trickle
through canopy layers for a few hours, readjusting
tendons in legs as they came to ache. sleep (or
something resembling it) set in, somewhere
around four.

some time slightly before six, the realisation
that my legs had extended and become so cold that
they'd started cramping all the way through hit,
coupled with the sounds coming through the bush.
thank you, if you made it all the way through :>
Joe Picardi Jan 2012
He says crazy
        I say creative
He says ******
        I say ballsy
He says weird
        I say wonderful
I love you
           You love him

                                                  He loves her
David Jin Mar 2014
The loudest sounds most kids hear on a school day
are lockers slamming, or maybe the late bell tone
I hear all of those, but the loudest sounds by far
are those created by the lacrosse team
when they beat the **** out of me
every day,
after 8th hour, at the intersection of nerd street and **** avenue

The attacks were formulaic, more complex than Pythagoras
but simpler than Newton’s Binomial Theorem;
Two would tackle me, one would pin me down,
and the rest would kick me around as if it were soccer tryouts
and I was nothing more than a ball
and regardless of whether you derived or integrated this equation
you always got the same solution
me ******, and them ****** happy

I would go home bawling; so would they
but instead of tears they dropped floaters
And I had a rep as the kid with a concussion before the season even began

I was born five pounds tops, with no biceps whatsoever
and as I grew my arms didn’t follow
making me as clear a target as a corpsman in World War 2
To my doc’s urging I drank milk religiously
but that didn’t do **** when I tangled with Darren Shields and his Air Jordans on 4th and eternity
Instead of my ankles however, he broke my ribs; 6 of em’
Told me he’d **** me if I ratted
So I told the mother I fell off my skateboard
Because I didn’t want a rematch with Muhammad Ollie

I considered hitting the off switch on my life
at least three times a week
but I didn’t know how to tie a noose,
didn’t know where my dad’s shotgun was
and I wasn’t ballsy enough to try a steak knife
Which is ironic because if I was brave enough for that
none of this may have happened
I’ll even admit I liked to daydream about building
and bringing a bomb to school by backpack
getting revenge by leaving a crater
where my class was at

And though the bible said suicide was cowardly
I was too cowardly for suicide
So I reasoned that if I got into college out of state
it would be worth a couple more years
of broken bones, ***** dousings, and concussions
So I did nothing


Fast forward eight years
I gained two feet in height
Armanis replace my Reeboks
a multinational corporation, my 4.0’s
I’ve made the covers of Fortune and GQ,
my speed-dial list comprises of more celebrities than actual friends
my annual salary consists of two significant numbers
followed by double-digit zeroes

When I’m not working overtime I spend my days
pulling beautiful women and enjoying the pleasures
that God gave us
Every time I yank my shirt off, each girl gives me the
same wide-eyed expression and unspoken question
regarding the cruel scars all over my body,
to the point where I resort to answering every time with,
“I played lacrosse in high school.”

And I have never forgotten about high school
But Darren Shields has, and fate has him working several floors down
He HAS forgotten
He has forgotten me, my face, my voice when I pleaded for mercy
But I have not forgotten him
Nor have I forgotten my hatred
Nor my fear

I could hurt him
I could fire him with contempt
or disgrace him publicly
or to the very least, remind him of the good old days
and make him feel like the **** he was
But I don’t; I won’t

He must wonder why I struggle
to look him in the eye
or shudder when he cheerfully claps me
on the shoulder every morning  
As I am still haunted by them old days

And despite how I now spend my life in a huge office
surrounded by wealth, women,
and mostly absolute silence
I can still hear the sounds of lockers slamming,
of late bell tones
But loudest of all, I hear the sound of my body breaking
Thanks to Darren Shields on 4th and eternity
Entirely fictatious poem, no references to people I know. If you are reading this, try to imagine someone is presenting it as a slam poem, you know?
Pendragon Jul 2013
A beautiful angel has been called home,
I already miss her so.
Even though we were miles away,
In my my heart she always stayed.
And now she's gone,
I never said goodbye.
I'll never forget all the trips,
To her house.
And all the silly things she said.
She was quite the ballsy,
Lady always spoke her mind.
I know she's up there watching over us all.
Probably giving everyone in heaven a run
For their money.
And giving my grandma hell,
For leaving so soon.
God too this angel, to end her pain,
And now she can walk again.

R.I.P Aunt Arlie,
You are loved and already missed
--- Aug 2013
Is it a word?
It's fun to say
And I use it to describe things
People
Ha, this isn't deep
But I enjoy this stuff.
Odi Mar 2012
When I have fevers
I grow *****
I say things like "Quit your ******* whining."
Or "You're such a **** dad."
When my skin burns
And my pores feel like they're on fire
from the inside
I say things that rhyme with the truth
Resemble a certain meaning
unfiltered
I don't make it sound melodious
Or tedious
Its factual
and im ballsy

I talk to walls about that crackhead on the fifth floor
Who I hear talks to herself at night
Or is it her baby girl one that was taken away
Her words are mumbles that resemble a feeling I cant quite name
I tell the walls they're too ****** thin
   they should eat something
Fatten up or they'll end up like my sister
    when I have a fever I don't remember the sound of her cracking rib bones
under my useless hands
I don't dream about CPR



Sometimes I hear children crying; the floor up above me
And If I listen really hard they aren't really crying, they're laughing so hard
And the man that is yelling he isn't really yelling hes playing peekaboo with his three
laughing
squealing
children and I smile
I am delirious
The truth is delirious
We are all ******* delirious
and drugged up
and ****** up
I laugh
It is one endless fever after another
And all the truth I think I've spoken
It was just a dream
The delirious kind
I laugh
Cece May 2012
has never really been my thing.

My clothes sit funny, and frump
in all of the wrong places. I'm
short, and kinda chubby. My body
is so disproportionate, I won't even
go there. I have freckles painted
all over, cursing me to be
forever fair skinned.

I'll look away, and pretend to be
in deep thought. Or I'll act like I
suddenly have something I'm
absorbed in, on my ****** phone.
I run my hands through
my snarly, blonde hair - even though
it looks just fine. Yes, I'm that person
who coughs, just so that I'm doing something
if I don't feel
quite right.

I'm sure you can decipher the difference
between my real laugh
and the fake.


At times though, this is null and void.
It's those days, that i love the most.
Rare, but rewarding.

Standing tall, I'll smile at strangers.
Looking in the mirror is fun, and taking
pictures - isn't torture. Laughter eases
out of me, and I shout.

Sometimes I get really ballsy, and
I'll tell you if I think you're cute
just because I can. Flirting is easier
and not something I worry about.


Confidence is all about the
m  i  n  d   s  e  t  .
Raphael Uzor Feb 2014
Strange woman, cheerful and chase
Charming as cheerleaders, choosy with cheese
Attractive, pleasing, ballsy and proud
But she'll crash you down to the ground.

Strange woman, fine as flour
Free as fire, and fair as flowers
Luring, tempting, **** and all
But she'll break your body and soul.

Strange woman, soft as silk
Sleek as snakes, and sweet as sweets
Alluring, teasing, luscious as oil
But she'll wreck your marital spoils.

© Raphael Uzor
Inspired by Proverbs 5
Dedicated to all married men.
Geno Cattouse Jul 2013
King wing nut fancied himself a fashion savant. No one was ballsy enough to tell him "you caahnt".
                                               He sewed a nice shirt from riverbed dirt.
                                              
"Wonderful sire was the obliging blurt.
                                               He stitched a cocked hat made from rooster
                                               Fat.

"Mahvelous sire was the rat a tat tat.

                                              He sewed wooden trousers
                                              to so many wowsers !!!

                                              His stockings were crafted from gobbledygook.

Superlative sire!! and "Oh goodness look"

                                              The Vapid sot laid down on a cot for a nap.
                                               He woke at two,recharged an refreshed.
                                              
He stripped down to the skin and proceeded to sew a suit from the thinnest of air.
He stepped to his throne from the twilight zone.
bemused and with hardly a care.
                                              What say ye now said the simplified oaf.

                                              All eyes drifted skyward as he strutted about.
                                              to applause and stifled guffaws.

"Your majesty has outdone himself".
"Leave the rest of your clothes in the closets and shelves.

                                              Nothing more needs be said.
                                              Gassed up and content with an over-sized head.
One4u2nv May 2015
Partners turned enemies turned frenemies turned long lost soul mates who never were meant to be-
You never know what you got until it finally walks out the door. And thank god for that ******* door-
If I hadn’t of walked the tightrope so clumsily maybe my peanut butter fingers would have, should have, could have grabbed a little bit better omit the fumbling…but I just kept stumbling-
I honestly thought I was going to die here in this trailer, this **** double wide modular hell of mine,
We stick ourselves in mud sometimes, Mud so thick it creates specific life lines. You can actually see your personal timeline-
That timeline has been looking like the color of ****. Well **** me sideways ain’t life a ******* *****-
****** ***** low down ******* skunt. Skinned knees ***** breeze I felt this old home giving me a breathless squeeze-
It squeezed me so hard I hit reality, reached up and snatched actuality with a left hook of formality equalling life’s gain of destined brutality-
I moved mountains harder than I’ve ever ****** any man. It was one swift move of ballsy rhetoric but I had to sell my soul for a compromise and a date just to get my hands on the blue prints for the master plan-
You see everyone is someone else’s ******. I’m on a chain, a noose, a shock collar and this filthy serenade is for the shot caller-
Someday I’ll cut those chains but most likely by the time I’m equipped I’ll have lost those better days-
You learn to live on less by biding time, by sweeping by, just keeping your heart above water and your head leaking dry. I remember my partner turned enemy, turned frenemy, that long lost soul mate who just was never meant to be….
Snow sits on the branches of dead trees like it's meant to be there
And it just sits but
It works
No one questions it

We talked to each other on the phone for 5 hours straight without running out of conversation

A lot like last Friday night when not so sober dialogue brought true feelings to the surface
And I had to swim through it to get to you
But that was alright
Because I'm a **** good swimmer

But even your words spit out of you like poetry when you speak about God or lack thereof
And I just wish that I could unravel into you like a deity of the heart

But let's not get too attached
Right?

What happens when what starts as talking about your wildest dreams to your best friend turns into ballsy conversation that is long overdue

You've always been better than me at poetry and saying what you really wanna say

Words fall out of you on cue catching me off guard without even having to think about it

Well what if I told you that last weekend I felt euphoric for a while
And euphoria did a lot for me
Euphoria inspired me
And euphoria took me to work without complaints
And euphoria fed me only what I wanted to eat
Only the richest of cuisines
Because you make me feel
Nothing less than euphoric

I find it funny that you think I'm intelligent
Like how
Nothing gets by me
And when you say things just know
That I'm an analyst
And you better bet I'll scrape out a double meaning that might not be there

But for now
The snow will continue to fall
And as those crystals sit silently on the trees
I will continue to fall
Continue to feel
Euphoric
http://youtu.be/uTnge5mcSKI
PJ Poesy Mar 2016
Sad abrasions, that is how you wish to end it? If you can't carry that with you, that unholy insecurity, without tossing it at others, others just like you, how can you be expected to be admired? That way, though seemingly popular amongst outlaws who have popularity, is still a ne'er-do-well way. You're lighting your own pants on fire.

Ballsy as it may be, singed ***** is all I see.
Jim Bob Apr 2014
We are all pawns in the system, the system is corrupt
About to self destruct cut your face handled rough
Stand against my words, see if I care
You'll be punted, caught in Delaware
And eaten with a fork, **** straight from New York
You'll be broken like Lady Liberty's image
Just passed the line of scrimmage, ballsy as ****
I'm testing my luck like speeding trucks
Below average lyrics, but you get the purpose
Like your life's meanings worthless, I know you heard this
**** it, I'm outta here like the Secret Service
Another rap.
Feedback would be nice, positive or negative.
raingirlpoet Oct 2016
warning: i am mentally unstable, proceed with caution
warning: i am 18 years old, proceed with caution
warning: i am prone to falling, proceed with caution around me
warning: i talk to myself, proceed with caution
warning: my triggers are older men, proceed with caution
warning: i'm queer, proceed with caution
warning: i'm ballsy as ****, proceed with caution
warning: i'm passionate, proceed with caution
warning: i'm a fuckng unicorn and my horn is made of poison, proceed with caution
warning: sometimes i say things, proceed with caution
warning: words come out of my mouth uncensored, proceed with caution
warning: i really don't like condescending authoritative figures, proceed with caution
warning: i like arguing, proceed with caution
warning: i have a tendency to be redundant, proceed with caution
warning: i don't know what i'm ******* doing, proceed with caution
-z.z
Cats **** on your clothes
On purrrrpose
They sound like sports cars
That's why everyone wants a feline
Just not their ancestors
Well, maybe the ballsy ones
Abdullah X Jun 2016
Wit woven and intermittent on paper
Hours owning a prickling pen in hand
Revision, re-take, rewrite - time wasted on how to shape "her"
The missing masterpiece, the babbling baby, the dark demand.

Hours owning a prickling pen in hand
Unreal voices vexing me - understand?
The missing masterpiece, the babbling baby, the dark demand
Threatens to overthrow my complacently creative mentally limp land.

Unreal voices vexing me - understand
Driving and dribbling me ballsy 'cross court; pressure and pain - insane
Threatens to overthrow my complacently creative mentally limp land
Uncouthly killing my deep desire to do what I love because I can.

I push past pressure and pain.
Wit woven and intermittent on paper
My wife, The Pen, I go now to **** her
Revision, re-take, rewrite - time wasted on how to shape her.
Be sure to follow my blog: https://mrxsworld.wordpress.com/
Frannie Dec 2020
Be Brave
Be Bold
Be Bashful
Be Bodacious
Be Bracing
Be Brilliant
Be Boisterous
Be Blue
Be Blunt
Be Blameless
Be Bright
Be Buoyant
Be Bemused
Be Ballsy
Be Baronial
Be Beloved
Be Benevolent
Be Balanced
Be Better
Be Bomb
Be Bountiful
Be Blessed
susan Apr 2015
i'm trying my damndest to see past you
'cuz i need to know what's pushin' you
i know and you know
you ain't that ballsy on your own
   so...tell me
what is it that pushes you
to get in my face?
Lucy Jul 2018
Here I am
Carefully teetering on the line of moving forward
Of life, of recovery
I’m scared to death, and they tell me I have to be kind
To not pressure myself, to take it easy
And I told them, I thought I already was
But they argue that it takes a lot of work
To hate yourself
And the way I do it is so masterful, finely tuned
So it’s foolproof and it’s kept me here
I guess I have to believe them
They tell me that my inner psyche
Will always drive me towards wellness, whatever that means
But my system got broken
And I have to let it restart

I’ve been working hard, y’know
I tell people my new script if ever they cautiously ask
A hundred times this year I’ve heard myself say
‘I’m not better, but I feel more in control’
I guess it’s true, though it may not always seem that way
I still can’t really breathe or think clearly
Still don’t know how my parents love me
And every time the seasons change, god I feel ill
I feel a real sense of regret and shock that wait.
I’m not supposed to be here.
They can’t help me trust that I am, just yet
Still can’t cross the road or take my meds
And not wish and wish right there and then that I was ballsy enough.
But I’m not, and I can only assume
That’s my inner psyche working.
wordvango Jul 2015
in not editing reality
not seeing what I say
is at times
only corrupt loneliness
support systems I
don't turn to
out of pride
or friends?
I cannot confide in
a job I have no pride in
but a check.
Not ballsy enough to fight
the wrongs in this world just
like a ******' animal hide in ignorant bliss?
11 Jun 2010
once bold, brave, ballsy
feared not
to speak so vastly
to state the obvious
and obviously
I lust for

I am holding a straw
the grip is firm
as I allure
it glances at me

once spoke
of new found scenes
the disengagement
sessions
once destroyed
destroys me

I am not convinced
but now my words have lost their worth
did you taste like someone else
as we hoped I cant really tell

did I need to be assured?

as to curious, caring, cold
feared not
to hide the dirt
to speak so absurd
how absurdly good
the good was

I am holding on to a straw
the grip is firm
void of meaning
like lovers vow
for better or for worse
I just believed in you

but desperate people don't win
our love was the seven deadly sins
11
Qualyxian Quest Jun 2020
chop 'em up like the Saudis do
inject him with the Wuhan flu
nuke 'em up like we used to do

 Sacha Baron Cohen
 singin' playin' knowin'!
nova Jan 2019
There are no trees.
Well, that's a lie. There are a few, but they're mostly planted by people in straight lines that run east to west, west to east.
There are few trees, and there's a lot of topsoil not being held down by root systems. When there's a drought, the soil blows around in dust storms that can last hours, days, weeks, all because of a lack o' rain.
A lack o' rain, for Christ's sake.
And because of the lack o' rain, windmills scatter across the landscape, pumping water up from the aquifer.
What for?
The freakin' cattle, of course. There's more cattle than people out here, but they're as trapped as we are; miles and miles of fences cut boundaries into the acres of rolling green hills.
Cut boundaries, cut boundaries, cut boundaries.
More boundaries are shaped by the railroad and the highway system (Thank you, President Eisenhower), but they also link the small towns dotting the landscape.
Towns. Not cities. Towns of five hundred people or less. More often less than not. (Villages?)
Everything here is old. Worn, not by use, but by being there, by being beat down on by the wind, and the sun, and years and decades of weather.
People included.
"Washed out" isn't the right wording. "Tired" is more like it.
And predominately white.
(Sorry, Native Americans. We kind of kicked you out and treated you like you were the invaders.)
Ruddy skin. Scarred arms. Calloused hands.
Tattered clothes covering hardened skin.
Even the kids are like that. Lookin' like they're ten years older than they really are.
There are two types of people here.
The first type is rooted here. The family's been there for decades, the farm-ground's been owned for longer. (Depression-era, you understand.)
(I was born in this house, I will die in this house.)
The second type is driven by the desire to get out, get out, get out. But get out of what?
(Fences, you understand, are not only physical, and all fences out here are made from barbed wire.)
(Barbed wire hurts. Wear leather gloves when you're fencing.)
The people technologically advanced, but in the ways that work best for working hard and earning money. Tractors. Combines. Medicine for the livestock.
Sure, you ain't got cell service half the time, but who needs that?
And who wants to listen to anything but the country radio station that plays ads half the time, the only station that comes in?
When it snows, nobody waits for the maintainer. (Snow plow on steroids, for the city folk.) They put the loader on the heaviest tractor they have and hope they don't get stuck.
There's a lot of hoping that happens here.
Hope that it rains. Hope that nobody gets sick, because most can't afford to be. Hope the gamble they took pays off. Hope they don't get stuck. Hope that the kids don't get in a wreck in a place with no cell service.
Football's a weirdly big thing here.
Every fall Friday night, if someone doesn't show up at the field to watch the game, they're either sick or drunk off their *** and banned from the school grounds.
(Sorry, there's swear words embedded in my blood. It's part of the dangers of living here.)
And if someone's not in sports, they're looked down upon.
Outcast.
The internet is a good escape. (If you've got it.)
So is television. (If you're into it.)
So is drugs and alcohol. (If you're legal or ballsy enough to do it.)
But.
But there's a certain sense of freedom that crashes through your veins when you're riding ******* across an empty pasture, the horse sweating and huffing and puffing below you like a train, your arms outstretched like your free, free, free.
But you're not and you've got chores to do and by the time you've put the horse away and fed them and checked cattle and told your boss (your grandpa or dad) that you've taken care of everything, it's dark.
So you drag your tired, sore self home and shower, letting the water wash away the sweat and the mud and the dirt (and sometimes the blood) from your aching body and change into a baggy shirt and pants and crash onto your bed.
(With two blankets - a jean blanket made by family and a quilt also made by family.)
And you sleep
and you do it all again tomorrow
with the tired people and the tired animals and the landscape that calls to you, no matter who you are.
Perks of living in the midwest. (Perks? Are there any?)
Arlene Corwin Apr 2021
Sometimes poetry is story telling, sometimes didactic teaching, sometimes a combination of both.

A Letting Go & Letting In

A ‘ballsy’ lady I know well,
Who doesn’t hesitate to tell
Those she considers foes, to ‘go to hell’
Considers meditation
Self-deception and delusion,
Which ‘dislike’ inspired me to re-define
In easy terms,
A practice I consider firm.

Meditation, as I find it, see it, use it
Is a mind full, filled by focus, plus,
A letting go and letting in
A ‘thing’ you can’t put finger on.
All these three are meditation.
These, a brain that’s working on
A different plane or several planes.

I admire her for her ‘*****’
But sympathize a mind the sees life as a
Nothing worthy or an all.
She may be missing what’s behind -
Which may be spirit or a soul;
Some non-something behind the earth
Contactable by non-thing faith.
No meter there to measure pleasure;
Or to calculate its treasure.

A Letting Go & Letting In 4.23.2021 To The Child Mystic II; The Processes: Creative, Thinking, Meditative II; Arlene Nover Corwin
Mateuš Conrad Sep 2018
the regression of progressives:

**** me, it could have worked,

i'd be happy, being a free-floating
free-radical

   biting on rather than snuggling
on the **** of
some demi goddess -

   but? no.

         i could have been an advocate of
progressive grammar...
i'm not a ******, i'm a Brit
sort of "machismo"...
but, no... no...

some people had to attack grammar?
oh... right...
so the Platonic
universals contra particulars question
was solved,
without my knowing?

**** me!

              so.....
you want me... to abandon organic proofs
of my ethnicity,
built upon quasi
   Marxist, more like:
globalist biases?
           while you unravel
the English grammar?

you out of your, ******* mind?!?!
learn the language, good,
use it, good,
then speak it better than the natives,
subsequently the copper skinned
immigrants... not so good...
the ****?!
              good luck Brexit
when your children feign
to speak a word of French....
good luck teaching them
Mandarin...
good luck!

promises promises...
the road to heaven is hardly
intentional -
it's like the road to heaven:
paved by promises...
or politico lies...


                   now, if you do not breed
a generation of youngsters who
are at least bilingual in one other
European tongue?
the **** are the cobblers going
to do... sell bananas
like some Banana Republic of
South America?!

*******...
           great... we can nuke the *******
island and exp0ect a shift
in the ripple effect of a *******
tide off the coast of Normandy!
******* zombies...

  no... you can attack my "identity politics"...
dfeny my biology... my ethnicity...
you can all do that...
but when you place trans-gender restrictions
on my access of grammar?
now? now you're pushing it...
*******!

                   you leave grammar out of it...
i'm not here to solve
the singular she with a singular he
with  plural non-****** ascription
of a, missing, ******* adjective...
you what a lesson in grammar?!
ask why philosophers
never used grammatical category words...
to walk the short-cut...

            what do you expect?
that i wouldn't revert / rather than regress
to "identity" politics?
what... you're going to rob me off
my ethnicity...
play the Michael Jackson bleach card?!
expect me to shy away like
some ******* Inuit?!

  metrosexuals not welcome,
esp. of a political class of
bogus barons and esquire farts...
            
if these people simply refrained from
toying with grammar...
i'd be all well and dandy...
did these people have to **** around
with grammar?! really?!
   no... i'm not buying it...
whatever you think of the outliers
of urban areas,
the people who tickle the country-folk
for reading lists when it comes
to combating boredom...

   you could have had all you've wanted...
a free floating
pronoun radical with
a noun-censorship implant...
but then you went against
the most intricate basis of a language...

both ******, but also
a plurality / singularity neutrality...
  no...

*******!

               i'm going to drink my
shveedish "absolutist" *****...
  and watch you send your quasi-daughters
back to the Sheiks'
desert to **** in a harem...
protected by castrato slaves...
who occupy the realm as counter
******...
                 has the softy -
missing the ballsy -
                        hey -
better than what Muhammad originally
provided...

                       unless he's high as a kite on
******....
  
           you can't attack both "identity"
politics... and at the same time
create grammar "politics"...
                  
        i call it a reversion drama -
"you" call it a regression grammar...

           see... my singular / plural /
male / female it ****** up...

               it's like the question
posed by Plato about universals and singulars
has been solved...
  with a ******* band aid.
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2018
i could have had siblings,
and turned out less... quirky...
but then Chernobyl happened...
and it was like...
either we keep one,
or we breed another,
     hapless limb-McKenzie;
i.e.?
   i'm not a solipsist by nature,
or choice,
  rather...
             a scare...
                  given that atheism
already knows that god,
or, "god", has solipsism ingrained
in "its" ontological architecture....
   and...
       wasn't Kant who revitalißed
the concern for dialectics?
why pin down Hegel as originator?
     i've moved past conversational
english in compositional parameters...
       alles ist abstrakt...
     there's conversational english,
which i retain...
   but compositional english?
  sorry...
                        there's an automated
hindering herr zensor in place...
                      conversational english
is for english people...
     my english?
           they don't teach in the native
high-schools;
also known as
     schattenzungepuppenspiel...
and i know how the ancient Saxons
love their compounding of words,
   how they loath the French deviance
from diacritical markers -
how they eat up consonant syllables,
and how they loath,
English shrapnel,
  and the hyphenation, intra-words...
guess this sort of ontology,
perpetrates, a central european
bias against the outliers -
Mc for the catholic in scotland...
Mac for the protestant
           under the guise of Knox.
so look, at the Chinese predicament of
the weight of my predicament
behind me... wavering and counter-instigating
a perspective...
of being a mono- guise of
reproductive structuring...
        if only Chernobyl didn't happen...
i'm sure that my mother
would have been more ballsy to
allow me a younger brother, or sister...
        i guess...
   i managed to figure out the solo...
more than, those forced to play
out the siblings orchestration...
oh i compete, to the death,
with my first acquired sibling...
mein schatten.
em Mar 2021
has it been kind? i should be a fool to think it has. and i'm not sure i want it to. at least not to me. perhaps others, other souls which serve true purpose and meet needs of each other, bouncing around and need-meeting and hard-loving, instead of crossing every line that is thinkable and failing, undeniably, at each little obstacle and challenge. its true that we meet many people over the course of our lives, hollowed-out and thin, hearty and honey-like, thick and sweet. sometimes these people candy-coat our existence. sometimes they **** it over. sometimes they simply sit, limp and lifeless, like a dead ballerina. serving no purpose other than for us to spit upon them, curse them out, regard and disregard. often they come and go, allowing us to live on, just living it out like a Greenland shark. but despite these people, despite these purpose-driven minds, i still stand around with this empty head of mine. and yes, i have no doubt i can create beautiful things. but i am certainly not one of them.
to me, it is interesting how being alive is so unacceptable, seemingly only it becomes so in the wee hours of the morning, like four am, right before the coffee and right after you've awoken from your most recent nightmarish fever dream. when the disintegration of your soul has yet to become entirely apparent. when you've yet to look in that ****** mirror and see yourself looking like death warmed over; ready to take on a new day, yeah right. and often, things, people, places, smells and sights and sounds and textures and tastes and simply cogs of our lives take it all back to those moments. telling myself to forget them, push them away like i always do when things get too close, too much. remembering anyways. that first touch, the blankness that follows. the feeling of being split open. being broken. thinking i would die. living anyways.
looking at people. remembering. like the way things tasted so good before. and the way they taste now. the lions at the zoo. pacing, hungry, fantasizing about ripping the fat white man's head off, feeling the bones crumble between their teeth, licking up the blood and ruling the world. how bad i felt for them. the time i turned too fast, too tight on my old bicycle. more blood. laughing. shaking. bandaids and a dark bathroom. the smell of chocolate cake and the scent of wine on my mothers lips as she came close. go to bed. the deadpan thump of the kitten against the wall. an empty kitchen table. summer nights that drifted through the windows, ate you up and calmed you down. black shoes that clacked against white linoleum. ******'s army. discovery channel and broken televisions. racism. mud fights in the river behind the small brick house, grass for miles and nowhere to go. thick honey people whose touch felt lighter than feathers. belly laughs, beer drinkers and thin paper-weight women. hospitals and IV drips, sunburns and stars you could actually see. tranquilizers and sickdays and scalding showers. obliviousness. neutrality.
happy childhood, sad childhood.
crazy talking teeth.what more could you ask from a primordial life?
i should be a fool to think it's been kind. whether i feel sorry for myself, that's another question. sometimes i am like the three-legged dog, dragging a leftover stump behind itself, buzzing with flies, whining and cowering and sitting in its own ****. ugly and dejected, victim to helplessness. a street-walker, a tired-talker.
then, i get filled up. with some insanity, a mix of molten rage, and that dangerous thing called hope. break the glass ceiling and you'll make it in life. or drown in it, and you become identical to every other human being that every lived and didn't end up in a book. a nuisance. an addict to all the small things life has to offer, never willing, never ballsy enough to allow themselves to get hooked in the cheek by some life-changing ****.

yeah, cuz that's it. that's the thing.

everyone is just absolutely
terrified.

— The End —