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The Whisper Aug 2015
In the midst of desperation,
With my hands pressed tightly against the sides of my head,
I'm hopelessly trying to hold myself together.

Will clutching my head hold my thoughts in their place?
Or is the delusion only another reason to believe
That I'm losing this fight with myself tonight?
Everything is going to be okay. I just have to try to make things better.
The Whisper Jul 2015
It starts with a thought,
And ofcourse it's of you.
What the hell is the matter with you?
Before I can blink; thought number two.
Is it just me, and I'm too blind to see?
Just a simple confession;
I can't stand my depression.
It means dealing with you like I ******* have to.
If you measured the pain with the amount of my sighs,
You'd know I can't sleep with tears in my eyes.
I don't ******* get it. I just want to dream...
Because my emotional stability is ripping from the seams.
The Whisper Jul 2015
Nobody deserves to see the joy and pain that I hide within me.

Whoever wants to dig and see only needs to prove that they're worthy of me.

So the smile that I hide and the tears that I hold do not exist in the face of the bold.

They are only revealed to those with hearts made of gold.
The Whisper Jun 2015
Guns are expensive.
Pills take too long.
I can't tie a noose.
So what's the use?
I'll light up a smoke
and smile as I die.
The Whisper Jun 2015
The city comes alive at 5:45 A.M.
Outside, Los Angeles
Makes her morning cup of coffee,
While I sit here,
Feeling so useless.
In a dark and silent house,
I greet the glimmer of dawn
With a false forced grin
And my eyes sunken in.
There's a whole world out there.
So much to do.
So much to see.
Infinite possibilities of what could be.
With a whole world of wonder
Just outside that door,
Why do I find myself thinking of you
And that smile that you wear
So casually like a plain white tee
Yet as elegantly as an expensive gown?
An infinite number of steps
Await me beyond this porch,
But is it worth it without you?
Is it pathetic to say
That I find it hard to take the first step
For we no longer walk same path?
No matter how hard I try
To shake the thought of having you
Out of my head
And losing you before I could show you
Just how I really feel.
I find myself trapped in a house
With no walls and no doors.
Inside of my mind.
Inside of my head.
For a few days you made my fantasy
Something real.
I miss you, I hate you.
I miss what never was.
The Whisper May 2015
Let's start with the good,
When I asked if I should.
Should I pursue, and give myself to you?
A friend is a friend, but when you kissed me;

You pulled out a part of me you don't deserve to see.

I held your soft hands and held your sea green gaze,
I looked to your soul and saw flashes of pain,
flashes of beauty and a glimmer of hope;

Hoping that we were not meant to be.

The guy you pulled out with a kiss is a fool,
a sucker for love and an ignorant tool.
He played by your rules and he kicked your ***.

Don't prey on the good men who still have some class.

I admit that the things that I told you were bad,
and sorry, not really, for making you sad,
I'll miss being able to call you my buddy;

You get what you give when you're selfish and slutty.
This poem has a long story to it. It involves a girl I once called a friend who basically led me to believe that she wanted to pursue a relationship or ***. But apparently, "she was just playing a game". I'll admit I played my role in ******* myself over by putting on the rose colored glasses for a while, but it recently ended with me trying to apologize to her for making fun of her, her refusing to accept my apology and playing the victim, and I called her a ****. So yeah, we don't talk anymore
The Whisper Feb 2015
Will swallow **** before she swallows her pride.
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