Yes, But Do You Know You Deserve the World

Through the sunshine and the rainbows,
through the dark and stormy nights,
your light shone the brightest,
and whomever it touched, it lit their world.

And in that light, do you know

you deserve the yellow of the sunflower below?
Your gleeful smile thawed the frost in the air,
rushing into me and all around me—
like the fresh breath of air on a winter morning,
like drops of water slipping through a cracked rock,
carrying beauty in an ethereal glow.

And maybe you don’t see it,

you changed me and the world around you.
Your words carried a voice of reason,
filled with warmth and understanding—
sometimes childish and playful,
but always fiercely protective,
like the sunflower guarding its yellow.

So I tell you again,
your eyes shine bright like the stars above
Your radiant smile took the blue out of my day,
set butterflies to dance in the world’s wake
Even when your cries dampened the world below,
in my eyes you still appear so beautifully yellow,
since the day I first saw your glow.

these metal chains around my wrists
must make me seem insane
the things I let go of
have blood on them and scratches engraved

but I swear I am holy.
I pray night and day.
anchors hold me when I go feral again.

They gave me these feathers
told me to write something sweet.
my words are the only source of warmth
I‘ll ever feel.

But I miss being held tightly
although I can‘t recall I ever was.
still I mourn closeness so deeply
as if it was something I lost.

they preach that it‘s time
that allegedly heals you
but it just feels pretentious,
they don’t know what I‘ve been through.

letters, poems, novels and sonnets
a million pages in cursive
a million of them haunt me

Creatively I

press five ideas between one --


cheerful, thick cover.

You all look at me with those eyes.

Beads reflecting light—
illuminating expression.

Are there for me or for someone else?
Are you speaking to me?

Or do I cast your eyes for a reflection of myself?

Some may look at me offended, telling me to back off.
The others look and think to themselves or don’t think at all, just stare.

I wonder what you think of me when I don't force my impressions on you.

Misfired signals; the boat abandoned to the sea.

I was thiknin'

Why do I always need to reorder lists

So that heavier, or worse things

Follow the lesser ones, as in:

"disappointment and tragedy"

vs.

"tragedy and disappointment"

It's like—Disappointment?!  Pft, we have tragedy here, man!

I wonder, would I have this proclivity

If I were from another country

Then I think

Nah

I'd be hangin' in that forest

A haiku stapled to my tie

To create or to consume, that is the question
To cook or to gorge, needs answering
When a leaf flutters down from a tree
Dead, worn and bereft of life
The earth greets it with little mercy
And proceeds to devour it utterly
But ask the tree what she poured into that leaf
And she answers calmly, all the life that came before me
Our duty is to be, but our desire is to set free
What lives within us, from others already freed
From the mortal yoke
It takes a poke, a nudge and sometimes a push
For it comes not easy, not easily shook
But once you breathe the air of creation
You will never again question
Whether to eat or create
You draw upon the joys and pain of the billions before you
And you exhale into being, a beautiful bloom

On a day that was
fraught
with anxiety and anger,
I sailed on
to the
other side.
The two pens that
blew up in my hand
foreshadowed the
prolific writing
streak to come.
Six poems today,
a personal best.
Bukowski would be
proud.
He might even
wonder
How I did it without
******
***** and
cigarettes.

It was easy.
I had bluebirds for
lunch, and listened
to Vivaldi.
I just let the telephone
ring
ring
ring

they told you no.
they meant never.

they tried to carve
a life without passion—
because passion is poverty,
and you deserved better.

just wait, little one.
the world will carry
your name on its tongue.
the dream they stole,
quiet as a matchstick,
burned through a decade.

today
you’ll strike it—

and the whole sky
will burst into flames.