I could only look at you as another crack in the dam of my morality
A wave of feelings meant to untangle and unwind my heart and make it feel something sweet
It wasn’t your fault you didn’t know it was soaked and flooded with sin
I go home plenty nights with my clothes soaked in beer and my teeth in nicotine
The teeth that keep cracking in my dreams of insecurity
Cracking and falling fences keeping me in falling
Through a ******* blowing wind
And in this scene
all I see are the silhouettes of my regret
In every life-giving breath provided by a cigarette
I could walk for days away from you
I would walk straight into a fire, flood, or plague
Rather than feel what I did again
Madness is a sea of caring for someone like you
I can’t be bothered to be eclipsed by care again

I change faces like I change shoes
Trying people on for size to temporarily fill the glass of emptiness that is my heart
Its been dropped and chipped and put back together but why would you choose mine over a fresh, clean new glass
I don’t blame you
I know you see the turmoil I would cause you right on my face
And I feel bad for the others who haven’t been able to see it so clearly
I don’t mean to hurt anyone but maybe I do

protected I sit alone
lacking the comfort of love
no one to soothe my isolation
surviving an angry crowd
i want to scream out loud
where is my equal
someone strong in spirit
able to find love under the pain
pain from slights of countless people
love not gone
just covered up tight
out in the open
what others see
not the real me
pain that has a life of it's own
taking my laughter
eating away at my joy
leaving me protected and alone

I am afraid of a thing.
That thing I don’t even know what is.
Fire rises to ****, stealing life and rain
It purges the land of everything
‘Till there’s nothing left to stand.

I am afraid of something.
Of something I cannot name.
Storm and thunder are here
A swirling mass of destructive winds
Breaking people and mortal beings.

What am I afraid of, I can’t say.
What are you afraid of? I can’t answer.
The grounds get up to meet the bees
They get up to curse the sky
Why do you even bother, if you’re just going to lie?

I am afraid of a being I cannot name.
I am scared of something, of something I can’t stand.
The thunder and lightning crash
Forceful enough to blow away most things

We die protecting.

I am afraid of a storm.
The storm that, inside me, rages on.
I fight to keep it in, keep it hidden.
But I am losing, that I’m aware of.

And one day, the storm,
Will destroy everything I fought for.

An island is of the earth
As is the water all around
Mountains and streams
You and I
All share the same mother

When the earth is bleeding
And so too our hearts
The blackened skies
That make us afraid
Are stains upon our soul

Separated from God
A bird covered in oil
Every breath one of survival
Crying out
What has become of us?

Take my hand
I will clean each feather
To fly again, freely
We are more than suffering
Though pain is my teacher

To stare into the sun
Without blinking
Is to see life for a moment
But only blindness will remain
Unless you can hear my voice

Do not push me away
For I want nothing from you
Is it so hard to imagine
Someone different than you
Wanting only for you to live?

I want to write a poem
But I don't know where to start,
My mind is slowly slowing;
Too much traffic from my heart

The roads are full and busy
People getting in my way,
Each motor holds a story
Each one has too much to say

Those traffic lights and stop signs
Are just getting on my nerves,
All I see are splattered flies
That my windscreen has reserved

A dice with death, no regrets
It's all sounding so absurd
Here I am, my fate is met
Yet still standing on this earth

I'm not alone though I groan
I am not alone, but all
Loneliness is subsequent
To an inner deeper fall

I fall and fall, fall again;
Do you start to get the gist?
Made the same mistakes again
Swerving quick, I nearly missed

The road I'm meant to pass through
It's the road I'm meant to choose,
The road that holds the 'good views'
It's the road I need to use

My brakes slam on, I am strong
Yes, I'm stronger than I think.
Traffic jams I don't belong;
Jump to ship or else I'll sink!

my sadness feels like home
the only part of me that's stayed
every part of me gone
except sadness, all ******* day

it welcomes me in the morning
when i get out of bed
it gets me ready for the long ******* day ahead

it waits patiently for the best time
to sneak into my mind to remind me why i cry all the ******* time my sadness lets me know when its not safe to come out so i stay inside without a doubt knowing im only spiraling down a pitch black hole to a future without a soul my sadness makes sure im enjoying my time a smile on its face as i try to unwind whats already untangled- nothing adds up.


ill never be good enough it tells me in my ear.
my sadness is my home, for the rest of my years

I used to have it all.

My throne that I sat high upon was my whole world.

I ruled my golden kingdom with such extravagance unseen by most living beings.

I ruled with my bloodline,

So close.
So strong.
Everlasting.

And one day, it was all taken from me.
Everything I had, gone.

I was defeated,
Despaired.
And left for dead.

And now, someone else sits fixated on my throne.

He wears my crown that I worked so hard to craft.

My crown I crafted from blood, sweat, tears, and pain.

To me, it's the crown jewel.
To him, it's nothing more than a dunce cap.

He is a nothing king trying to be everything I was.

But he needs to realize,

Thrones were only ever built for one.

I am a nothing man.
Just wanting to be a nothing King.
And sit high upon my throne,
Built from all these bad feelings.

To realize I overcame.
Everything I faced.
I overcame my biggest enemy.
The evil ***** know as "Heartbreak."

But for now I'm just a nothing man.
Just wanting to be a nothing King.
I have nothing left to lose,
They've taken everything.

But when you break a nothing man down so much,
Sooner or later, he will rise as the Nothing King.