i feel too much
i love too much
i forgive too much
i'm good too much

There comes a point and time
where you just have to stop.

Stop loving them
Stop worrying about it
Stop trying so hard.

You aren't enough
You can see that
Every time you look in the mirror
Your reflection stares back
Pointing out
Every
Single
Flaw
There's so many
You talk too loud
You speak too much
And you always say the wrong thing
You aren't pretty
You aren't smart
Your grades show that clearly
You're definitely not popular
The way you search for a table at lunch
And no matter what anyone says
You aren't enough

How cruel is it for God to give me wings.
Amongst all the other petty things?
And still bind me to the Earth,
Avoiding my death, same as my birth.

Three times I fell,
Three times I broke into hell.
A fourth one there shall not be.
No more, will the night listen to my plea.

As heavy rains poured from the stars,
I swore that this world would be ours.
My lies were too well glazed.
You left my insides completely razed.

These lungs can’t hold any more water.
My blood boils, and it’s only getting hotter.
Ice can hold only so much,
My soul is also, such.

Get off my back, ok?
I've got heaps of homework
I've got a practice internal
which looks completely difficult
I've got to pack for a field trip
even though I don't have all the things, but I'll make do
All of which has to be completed in two days.

I've been exhausted,
Haven't been getting enough sleep
I'm not ready for the pressure of school
My mind isn't on that level yet
Woken up this morning,
Nagged to do lots of things
As if this pressure isn't enough already.

It's only 9:50AM,
My day's starting to go down hill,
It's turning to ****.
Can't you see that I'm stressed out?
Can't you see I've got enough on my plate?
Can't you see I'm fighting back tears?
Can't you see I'm trying to motivate myself to do everything else?
Are you trying to bring me to my breaking point?
It sure as hell feels like it!

It makes me want to scream,
Throw things,
Yell and hit,
I want to have a break from all this,
Get away until I calm down
Can everything just be easy?

But I'll square my shoulders and hold my head high,
You won't see me cry.
No one will see me cry.
I'm not going to lose it,
I won't make a mess.
I'll handle it
Do my work,
Prepare everything
And try be positive.
I just need my headphones,
That's all I need
To block everyone out
And get things done.

Please,
Stay off my back?
All I ask for is two days.
Two days
Without extra pressure,
Please?

l.v.s

What you give me is what I receive,
The feelings overloading and essentially controlling me are forcing the inner version of myself to ignore thee,
Block off anyone who interferes with my life in the smallest of ways.
Stress is enough,
I can no longer think straight.
Consistently titling to both ends of our path,
I thought the starting would lead us somewhere beyond the fan stays of great,
But I was kicked and left in the dust with the others,
The prophecy unveiled itself,
I was right since the beginning, but my witless gut remained oblivious to my emotionally unstable self and instead stayed behind with the real you.
I grew attached to you, thinking everything for once would finally accumulate into one enjoyable entirety,
But you shattered me both internally and externally,
Now all I can focus on is how to fix these pieces back together.
Before I loose touch upon myself once more,
I ask anyone for forgiveness, begging on my knees for all to please.
I wish to give the little portion of my purity and happiness to you, now, am I considered the wrong and careless one?
Or are you, the heartless form of me?

Into The Night

Lost in a pattern of thoughts,
as these experiences continue to shape our realities,
fell in love gave my heart away,
and watched it disappear with her into the night,

too much heartbreak,
too much more,
too much greed and lust,
too much wanting too much more,

is that even correct English,
does it even matter,
it seems I’m frozen in a moment,
but the words just continue faster and faster,

fck you,
fck me,
I mean,
that in the most loving way,

we’re all fckt up,
the plan is no more,
we’re lost in a position of indecision,
where there is no either or,

lost in a pattern of thoughts,
as these experiences continue to shape our realities,
fell in love gave my heart away,
and watched it disappear with her into the night…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆

Often times, it's the person sitting right in front of you.
Smiling and laughing and cracking jokes.
The one that's always the first to ask how you're really feeling.
The one who will sit with you in silence,
Or let you scream to them your frustrations.
The one who will give you a shoulder, an ear, a hug, anytime you need it.
The one who is always there, and never judging.
People don't often see their pain, because they've become so good at hiding it.
So they keep smiling too big,
and laughing too long,
and letting people soak their shoulders with their salty tears.
Because, unfortunately,
Depression targets the ones that feel too much,
until they feel nothing.