Jey Blu Mar 13
is there a place
is there a mindset

where i can sleep for ten thousand years
where i can run from all these demons

when i can close my eyes
when i can forget how good it is to hurt

is there a place
is there a mindset

where i can smile without pain behind my eyes
where i can stop picking at my nails to keep me from screaming\

when i can breathe
when i can clear my mind and the tears from my eyes

is there a place
is there a mindset

where i see the good and people
where darkness doesn't leak into every crack in the light

when i can stand up straight and proud
when i don't have to hide every flaw

is there a place
is there a mindset

where i can be free

         .  .  .  .  
it's called home
  Mar 13 Jey Blu
My name is Erin
and i was raped
at the age of 7

it has taken me
14 years of my life
for those 13 words to escape
my hollow mouth

the only questions i come to now
is why
why lock me in that room
why take everything from me
my innocence
my purity
my childhood

in my own room
where my family trusted you
where i trusted you
the night terrors i have to this day
still haunt my mind

like a never ending
drive in movie that plays
only the moon in the night sky
isnt made to be found here
there is no light in these terrors

i cant sleep this time of year
because every time i do
its you
on the seventeenth of March
in that room
locking the door
shutting the windows
undressing me
yelling at me
every single night
i close my eyes

it has taken me 14 years
to accept the fact that i was taken by you
i have been numb ever since
left in the dust
rotting away at the core
thinking i was nothing
thinking i deserved nothing
because you took everything

but not anymore
i will recover from this
i am strong enough
i believe in myself
i believe in my own happiness
and i promsie
that when i have children one day
i will never ever let them rot at the core
i will find happiness
the darkness will not take over this time
  Mar 9 Jey Blu
I am lost inside my head
Every time I lay in my bed
Waiting for sleep to wash over me
Sleep, that blissful nothing.

I am lost inside my heart
My emotions are tearing me apart
But that pain is nothing
Compared to how I constantly feel

I am lost within this world
This world of pain and insincerity
I wish someone would carry me
Back home to where I used to be free

Free from having to search my heart
In order to play my part

In the midst of this storm
I have to pretend to be someone
Who isn't me.
  Mar 8 Jey Blu
Janelle Tanguin

i used to only write sad poems.


you see,
i am a cynic,
a cemetery,
a holocaust,
a chaotic, distant, lost girl
buried in her own

but with you
i am different.

i want to wake up,
keep my promises,
make up for lost time,
spill blood and ink,
try again,

for you.


you walk me home
and the skies blush
pink cloud summers

we part and i marvel
at the sepia tint
of backyard roses
blurring my lenses.

you came in
like the missing palette color
i never knew
i needed
my skies painted with.


now, you are all the love poems
i didn't know i could write.

and every metaphor i create
is just a lengthier version of
'i love you'

i really do.
  Mar 7 Jey Blu
Akira Chinen
My self worth sleeps
with my self loathing
and the devil is watching
the whole thing go down
and whats one more scar
on a dented heart
and it hurts to breath
but it feels good to bleed
so I keep something sharp
underneath tear soaked pillows
and there is a dream somewhere
saying all this pain is worth it
and there is a reason somewhere
saying to keep my head up
and there is someone
who wants to listen
and there is someone
who wants to say something
and its all been said before
but maybe we can say it
one more time and maybe theres something more to living
than watching the devil
watch my self worth
sleep with my self loathing
Jey Blu Mar 7
Interesting, isn't it?

When people say they care.
I know they don't give a
Shit, at least don't give me false
Hope you never feel like this

Mind over matter they always say
You don't see that my mind is the matter

Letting you see my demons
I give you my trust and you just
Fuck it up
Everyone says "I care" but

When it really comes down to it
Only very few would stay
Unless they can gain from staying
Lions on the prowl, waiting for their
Dinner, my heart and mind

Everything weighing me down and
Not a single joy in sight
Death seems better than this migraine of a life
  Mar 6 Jey Blu
Amanda Francis
I went to bed with flowers in my hands and woke up carressing a rifle.
My delusion of self can offer me no help, cause you've been twisting sides.
Making me fall in love with you, you're waging a war of lies.

Cold metal sooths open wounds, I never knew you could be this cruel.
fragments of the mirror stare back at the fragments that remain.
Theres nothing I can see that looks anything like me.

So' I'm wondering where I am and who you are?
and when this ever got this far?
I idolised you and now i despise everything you do.
I can't stop myself asking, am I falling out of love with you?
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