I've hit rock bottom
Once or twice
Been to the moon and back
Lived on the thinnest ice
I've gathered some scars
And I've talked to the stars
Spent some time behind bars

I have paid a due or two

I ran for my life
From an angry Moose
I looked up the proper number of
Twists in a noose
I turned the tables on a hungry bear
I've climbed the mountains and breathed the rarefied air

I have paid a due or two

I've had my long dark nights of the soul
I've seen the pieces, and I've seen the whole
I've pushed a boulder up the same hill many times
Just to watch it roll back down, so, once again,
I make that climb
I've written riddles, hymns(riffs) , blog entries, and rhymes

I have paid a due or two

she's like my midas, incarnated
golden just for me, i know she hates it
but she likes me though
she says

she'll call me baby, call me crazy
when she's the one cursing at me
but she likes me so
she says

and i'll be back everytime
like a sinner drawn to wine
i'll let her touch me, oh
i'll let her drown me in her liquid gold

call it toxic, call it comic
but all i want is this

she's like my midas, her touch is blessed
makes me golden, feeling euphoric
and she loves me so
she says

if this ain't love then what is?

and it's always the same
like a moth drawn to flame
i'll let her touch me, oh
i'll let her burn me 'til we're liquid gold

so she could love me for a bit
hate me for a bit
my love's been being cold to me

so just love me for a bit
i wanna be your *****
and it would feel like gold to me

It is strange and scary
To think so,
Still, I do
If I had not known music
I would’ve still known you
Still would’ve heard
The inarticulate whispers of your gown
Still then,
Gentle lashes silhouetted
Upon a sharp gaze

For the moon does not rise and set
Merely for its night
And the Mayna birds sing
But little to boast
For who dare boast but I
Who speaks and speaks, on, on of you

And they tire and groan
Who is this?
'Bet we could flicker a tad bit prettier
A sea’s sigh gentler than this leaf
That lives and lives, on, on in you'
Try then, I say, just try

Every dawn and dawn, they sing
Every dark and dusty blue
What do you think?
Curiosity tilts their heads
And I smile through my laughs
Still not, still not

And they wilt a little
Quietening down for a new show
Before a new sun’s birth
Before another shadowed sky

It is sweet and smooth
The envious mimicry
Of silver and song

Still not though, still not

No music I wish to wade in
Just the touch and touch of her breaths

Sounds
Of a familiar
Song

A tune
To follow
The bridge
To remind us
Of past love

The new
Unexplainable
Sensation

Of an
Old song
Taking
New roots

in the backyard
lighting up a smokescreen
high on all the thoughts
of what once was and could have been

filled to the brim with these emotions
but i don't feel a thing
how tiring it is to always think so much
and still remain the same

concerned for my future, got my mind stuck in the past
barely made it this far as it is how am i  honestly expected to last
but i made it, i'm here
no applause, please, no cheers
this isn't quite how i envisioned it
not how i pictured it
still fighting for control of my life despite everything

My ship has sailed, but has it really?
There’s too much, too many of uncertain feelings
And the storm in the robes of a lamb

What is missed, does wet mean pleased?
Four-leaved clover, it’s over

My ship has sailed, I’m lost at sea
Or am I the sea, too large to see me..?

I wanted to care but I cared way too much
The way to nowhere, the rays you can touch
Burning bright, burning, burned over with grace

Bear with me, I’ll carry thee

You’ll be the ship
And I’ll be the waves
The waves, the waves

The protector of the commotion
Humor me, human slow as the wide oceans
Blue in the face that never gets too green
Inhuman remains hidden behind screens

Protective smoke and the mirrors
Mirrored to never get clearer

I wanted to be there, I was way too much
Getting there, got nowhere, the whole world to watch
The bright star to follow to forget starts

But bear with me, I’ll carry thee

You’ll be the ship
And I’ll be the waves
The waves, the waves

The ship, the waves, the golden shore views
The ship, the waves, the forever cruise

I wanted to care but I cared way too much
The way to nowhere, the rays you can touch
Burning bright, burning, burned over with grace

Bear with me, I’ll carry thee

You’ll be the ship
And I’ll be the waves
The waves, the waves

Bear with me, I’ll carry thee

Until you’ll be the ship
Until I’ll be the waves
Carry me always

you put your faith into her
yeah you gave her the world
she promised that she'd do right by you
you taught her things like
little girls never hike up their skirts
girls don't wear shirts
they wear dresses and blouses
do their hair in pigtails
and make homes out of houses
paid for by their husbands

but what if he told you the truth
told you she went away with his youth
she was gone but he would take her place
and he
wants to be
someone you could learn to love
if it was me
id see to it that he
knew that he was enough
he just wants to know he's loved

somewhere else
he reaches for the high shelf
he carries the heavy loads
and he watches as time goes by
he can't help but cry
what if he asked for help
asked to end the life he was delt
begged for you to look past the body he never asked for

what if she told you her new name
would you turn her away
because just the other day
she was the little boy you raised

and she
wants to be
someone you could learn to love
if it was me
id see to it that she
knew that she was enough
she just wants to know she's loved

and they
want to stay
in your good graces
don't say they're going through phases
don't take away their happy places
just because you don't get it
doesn't mean they have to regret being alive

i wanna kiss your face
take me back to your place
my mother will never know
oh oh oh
i'm afraid i'm gonna like kissing your girlfriend more than you
i'm afraid she's gonna find out that i wanna be used by you too
i'm afraid you'll hate me hanging around
i hate the sound of my own sounds
and i hate how your feelings drown me
and thoughts of you surround me
in the best possible way
i've never been one for fate
but there you are
still standing by me

strawberry dress and clear lip gloss
laying your head on a soft bed of moss
the way you run off
reminds me of ballet
and your smile in the sun
just makes my day

but you're like a nosebleed
you really taste so sweet
i wanna take care of you
but you're no good for me
i've never had a nosebleed
i wish someone would hold me
and sing me soft songs
in their arms as i fall asleep

your scraped knees are so cute
i wanna say that i love you
but by now it's too late
you've got a boyfriend anyways

i spend all my money
on a tissue box
and waste all my time on
the show you watch
hoping that one day soon
i'll get to be the one with you

but you're like a nosebleed
you taste so ******* sweet
but you come with a punch to the face
and you make me wanna leave this place

you're like pulling teeth
it's what i need
but i ******* hate you
you're like a nosebleed
know what i mean
you taste so sweet
but it's painful
and just like me
you want everything to be perfect but you're so unstable
begging to be taken on a table
you're a self inflicted injury
and i've been clean for several weeks