The connotation—the impulse.
The urge, and the strike.
A candle, a lighter—
the flame that ignites.

Sitting on the floor, in my room that night;
pen on paper, those words in my head.
Then the flame burned the papers—a fire so red.

The loudest silence, felt by one yet unheard by others, is the quiet tremor of a heart splintered in solitude.

in a very large labyrinth
a lone walker wanders
once was a figure danced, bathed in light
now an echo fading into night

each step forward, under the moon
carries a whisper of a tune
a melody once sweets, bitter now it seems
for love shared by one, alive was at least in dreams

the hearts solace, memories fray
yet there’s relief in the unravelling
from the grasp of a love that never did spread.

In this gentle release, both sorrow and grace,
For a heart that loved alone, finds its own space.
No longer tethered by what could have been,
Embracing the stillness, of love unseen.

I ask for no love to linger, nor fade into blue,
But for memories to visit, as old friends often do.

unburdened now, but i miss the weight’s hold.
that gentle hold.

Humans are social creatures
Yet the darkness never casts me away
Unlike when I'm walking with my friends
But I'm two steps back
Because 4 people together
Will crowd the hallway

Humans are social creatures
Yet a locked room won't throw me away
Unlike my friend pulling our other friend
Because she has to tell her a secret
That just isn't for me

Humans are social creatures
Yet the water of the shower doesn't drown me away
Unlike the way I know everyone in my school
But don't fit in any of the groups

Humans are social creatures
Yet my music doesn't let me faint
Unlike when I'm asked about my best friend
But realise I don't have one to name

I cannot help but wonder tonight if the archangels have abandoned me.
The universe has a plan for me but executes it unsympathetically.
My nocturnal nonchalance convinces me that I have nothing to lose,
and no one watching over me-

But there is always the moon;
There’s the moon.

I wonder if I will be happy, soon.
If all the lunar rays
I harvest through my labradorite will serve me well.
Whether I’ll hit the ground running or just simply
hit it like a meteorite.
Will I reach for the stars or throw myself
in front of the metro.

I seek solace in the sun and safety in the stars
but the sun no longer shines and the
stars no longer give a **** about my safety.
I have been plunged into darkness and led
astray.

Wandering aimlessly,

using the world as my own ashtray
because what other use does it have for me now that I am drowning,
with my head in the clouds?

Churchill called it the black dog,
I fear I will die within this brain fog.

Today I will have fun
Alone
I'm doing this retreat
On my own
To be and feel again
At home.