my tears don't threaten to spill
they run down freely
fiercely
without my permission
i never really did learn how to choke down a sob
i was never taught to do so

Tears.
In my eyes.
Tears.
On my cheeks.
Tears going down my face eating me.

I don't go outside often.
I avoid the sunlight,
And sleep in a coffin.

Your stereotypical vampire,
This is another sob story
For a ritual campfire.
Not an individual
To be admired,

But how I long to be
Blown into the nose
Of fame like *******
With no shame.

I'd be another meteorite
To crack under the spotlight,
Diagnosed with blocked sight

At a dead end
As inspiration deadens
And the debt of regret sets in.
Nothing would be more pleasant.

(c) 2015 Brandon Antonio Smith

I can't ask God for the pain to cease
To cleanse this grief within
Because for some reason it makes me
Atone for all my sin.

I cry and sob the pain away
Wishing it to be gone
But the one thing I can never do
Is cry and sob to God.

Surely I know He's there for me
I surely know He cares
He listens when I cry out to Him
He answers all my prayers

This surely is a killing pain
That lingers deep within
But there's nothing I can do-it seems-
To slay this awful sin.

I hate the pain that plagues my life
I want it to be gone
Still I know that I must have it
To sing my mournful song.

Did you ever see me cry?
Hiding in my own corner--
It was a dismal place as dark as
Night and as pressing as the
Silent presence of death.
Did you ever watch me cry?
Every tear a diamond,
And upheaval of sobs,
Disquieting the stillness,
And disappearing into shadows.
Have you ever noticed
The drowning of my eyes,
Pools of pain and unpleasant misery,
Poaching my soul,
While undetected by others?

even when she cries,
even when she yells,
she's beautiful.

the smell of cigars,
the mess around us,
the arguments we start,
the feelings that makes us fall apart,
the heartbreaks we suffer,
the words we mutter,
the broken pieces we repair,
the kisses we share,
the hugs that mend us,
the insults that turn to dust,
the tears we sob,
the banks we rob,
create one
chaotic perfection,
out of us.

your throat closes up, making you
c h o k e
on your own words, your own shouts for help
nothing but tight lips and squinted eyes
portray any amount of emotions on your face
you want to screech, to tell someone to
h e l p   m e   I   n e e d   y o u
but no words
no squeaks
no whispers
escape past your hard teeth
finally
all alone
you begin to sOB

i don't like this website anymore
everything is deep and wonderful and precious
it reaches skinny white arms like little wires down slipping down
into my skin and tugs
invasively
I'm not crying
that's just the wind
whipping my hair about in this daylight charade
as I pretend
to dislike the feeling
suckerpunches to the stomach
oof
another to the heart


I love your poetry
but it's tearing me apart