i’m inherently sad.
i’ll never get better.
i’ll **** myself right now
so i won’t be forced to feel this way later.
and no one will notice
or even shed a tear
in fact, it will be ages before anyone notices i was ever even here.
and if someone cares enough to ask why or
“who did this to you?”
i’ll simply point one long, broken finger at you.
and the world will see,
they’ll all understand
i did my best by you but i was only a kid
so how am i meant to escape you if you’re embedded into my lungs?
how am i supposed to love you if you grew into a stranger when you grew up?

Some people say sisters are like blisters that just won't go away
They irritate and bother you after you once rubbed them the wrong way
They say sisters are like stickers like a thorn in your side
They tear you up embarrass you and strip away your pride
They say sisters are like liquors they burn, confuse, and sting
They take control of your thoughts and manipulate your dreams
They say sisters are not worth it they should be your greatest enemy
You should never let them be a friend or it will all just end in jealousy
But i have one a sister i mean
And i can't agree with all these things
Because if a sister is a blister then she's a band-aid too
While she sometimes will be a bother she chooses to patch it up and heal you two
And if a sister is a sticker then she is tweezers too
She might be a thorn in you but she’ll try and pull the pain out of the wound
Once she realizes she created a hurtful groove
And if a sister is like liquor that burns you to your core
Than a sister is like nectar that sweetens and restores
She may insult, you, sting you, confuse you or lash out in the moment
But her kind words mean so much more
And her heart is truly in it
So sure let your sister be competition and see how much you lose
If you let jealousy rule your relation than yeah
Your relationship won't produce any fruit
But if you approach her with love, selflessness, patience, and gratitude
I think you'll find a sweet soul and beautiful mind lurks under her rocky surface
And not only that but a life long friend to hold your hand in the darkness
So maybe a sister can be a struggle a blister, thorn, or burn
But more than that a sister is someone who loves you always, so much, for sure.
It won't always be easy, pretty, simple, or picturesque
But a sister is oh so worth it so just know i think you're the best

i wish i was an only child
but sometimes i dont
my sister
she shares
she loves
she laughs
but all i respond with is a hit
a yell
a scream
all i am is mean
and sometimes i wish
she was an only child

Eleven year difference
What does that mean?
It means she is a toddler
And I am a teen
But our relationship is still so bitter sweet

I despised my little sister
Her mother I wasn’t impressed
Perhaps we shared a parent
But still I saw her different
Her mother she expressed

Two years it took
Finally, I opened my arms
She is not her mother
She actually has a heart
And I began to see God’s work of art

I sit here beside my sister
Four years have gone by
She represents a piece of me
A piece of my family
Her mother she never was

Grief's heavy mist descends upon my soul
A sorrow so profound, it takes its toll
Like autumn leaves, joy withers away
Leaving emptiness, night's dark gray

Pain's sharp edges cut through every breath
A constant ache, a hollowed depth
Longing to turn back time's relentless hand
To hold what's lost, in a fading land

Tears fall like rain, a deluge of pain
As memories haunt, like a refrain
Echoes of laughter, now taunt my mind
A bittersweet reminder, forever left behind

In this dark valley, I search for a way
To navigate the shadows, night and day
To find solace, a respite from the pain
And learn to live with the ache, again and again

Grief's journey is long, winding, and slow
But even in darkness, seeds of hope grow.