Why’d you have to say goodbye?
I was doing fine.
I wasn’t really thinking about it,
There were no tears in my eyes.
Now I’m sitting here once again,
Crying about you,
Because even though I’m doing my best,
There was nothing I could do.
It’d be easier if I could just avoid
This feeling crashing down,
But you know I have to sit with it
Since I’ve been focused on healing now.
Once again my chest feels hollow,
My ribcage collapsing in,
I want off this emotional roller-coaster,
I just want one carnival game win.
I know tomorrow I’ll feel silly
For having held on this tight,
And I will never do this again,
Clearly my mind doesn’t process right.
It’s stupid how fast it hit me,
From just a single little text,
Now my progress feels erased,
And my heart’s a ******* mess.
I almost wish you’d stayed silent,
Kept your goodbye to yourself,
Because I was finally feeling better
Putting your memory back on the shelf.
I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I'm still grieving or that I'm angry at myself for it.
