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Pavel Rup Mar 21
In life, perhaps, I fear no more a thing,
But pangs of conscience frighten my weary soul.
In night’s deep hush, I pray, my voice takes wing –
My heart aches sharp, and tears begin to roll.

Some are no more. Their souls to heavens fled.
No chance to meet, embrace, or greet again.
What is life? A fleeting flash...
The wave runs fast, by breakwaters split and spread.
No words remain to answer for the pain.

Forgive me now, for I was blind with pride,
Why did I fling sharp words into your face?
Forgive me, those I wounded in my rage,
Back then, life’s feast seemed like eternal grace,
And I felt not the sting of conscience’s bite.

O wisdom, soothe this sorrow in my breast!
In Lethe’s stream, no soul may enter twice –
To you, departed, much I owe, confessed.
The voice of conscience screamed in night’s still air...

Lethe – the river of oblivion in Greek mythology.
Maria Feb 15
It's broken, scattered in pieces, in shreds.
What was immoveable, now is crumbled.
It morphed from spool into puny threads
And got so futile and so unrequired.

All is gone, both faith, and repentance.
And what is now, no meaning, no goal.
No one needs excuses or blaming.
Neither of those who needed are gone.

All is trampled down, mixed up.
All is stupidly wasted in whole.
And only one mediocre Zero
Is stayed with no shame at all.
time forgot
the scars
the words
the open sesame
of my miseries
my contempt
for the irony,
of freely contrived romance

how her lips,
pressed against mine
became the toothed suckling
of her vampiric abandon
the sucrose of my affections and adorations of her
how she fed on my caresses and poetry
how she wounded my soul
bled me out of devotion, mercifully, with adultery
and in the coffin
where I lay
kosher, rigor mortus preserved, for her trophy cabinet
taxidermy of bloodmoon, post-******, post-disenchantment
if the coitus fits, the honeymoon was faked
how she planned it
bottled my tears for a dry day
lubricant for her tryst

for having faked it
so many times,
surely the ink has run dry
surely the letters were forged by faithlessness
my Hancock used,
to certify her authenticity,
against my imagination
the signature of my pleasures,
a wife's knowing,
turned to the devil's archives
my powers
turned to the dark
where my light
illuminated wonders untold
impossible
for a monkey has palms and thumb
but it builds not empires with feces
wherest, withal, man builds forests where monkeys swing

and I sung at her wedding
canary fleeing the coalmine, of debauchery,
"Speak now, or forever hold your peace."

hours ahead, the setting sun,
I spoke, and the world's light dimmed
that I should be beleaguered
20,000 leagues fatigued
taking my meager pay
how many times
can a heart break
beholding infidelity
a woman so treasured
if one should have
20,000 hearts, and 20 souls,
how many times
would the domino effect
produce domino displays
like rivers and waterfalls
seas and skies
mountains and snowfalls
lakes and ponds
oceans and mirages

I sung it all
for never shall I bear peace
in the sight of infidels
for they massacred love
in their ****** of my love
a thousand men took her
willingly, she walked
into the church mass
and let them have their way
to spite my face
to rend my heart open
with joyful, painful *******
and drain my heart of its love
in the pews
for the children's sake
to see the fraud of their father
that my blood be tears
and my tears be blood
I have no quench of my sorrows
I bleed ore
and cry thunders in the bellows of my torment
known never peace have I
though having supped of Nirvana
and forged heavens
from my joys abundant
I have been mad
and wasteful
surely
to weather myriad wicked adulteresses so
and still have peace in my breast
it
surely,
I profess
was never peace, but madness!

SURELY

and so,
that is why
it took time for my heart's breaking
for every ******
and every pulsing
of cave, to womb and back,
the journey of each sacrilege
of innocence
that generations
of children
have been metaphysically unborn

by such a fuckery

that worlds have been destroyed
before spawning from nebula

that lives have been destroyed and saved, both,
before needing salvation
before being endangered

that hope was undone, in need and dream,

that songs were unsung, and sung in their unsinging
before stories wrote their need to be shared
that bards would be unborn
before legends could prophesy this unholy merrymaking
befallen me
and I,
soft of heart and lung
could be drowned
in my keep
with nary a poppy seed
to sate
the breaking of water, in me, soft-hearted I be
that meteors
could shatter the stillnesses
of the surfaces of oceans, tempered as I,
and I,
as ice shattereth
and remain disparate, frozen in time,
I break, and continue, beyond need - beyond agony
beyond warmth that wets the rain to stir from sleep
beyond ice such that tears never dreamt of cold
to neither have walked the sky
such tears are dream itself
but
to dream of cavernous sorrows
mere
to satisfy the torture of things wished to be unknown
what madness could be avoided
though blessed be the avoiding
that there need be sorrows such that hells become heavens
and the devil become deserving of all the hells
due the death of Christ
that lucifer bear the scorn of all sinners
for all time
till time loses meaning
and joy becomes as vapor to lucifer
as vapor is to the vacuum of space
but a pebble in an ocean's wealth of nothing...

Therein, my wrath,
due all my torments, chronic as breath,
that my heart has become a vice
that empathy has become chastity belt
frostbite, my melanin price, cakes my fist
as I behold my gavel,
and judge all the ****** 1000-years before their deaths,
with such wisdoms, my rage knows not end
my fury knows not storms, in universes beholding their eternal gaits,
my fury cannot fathom taming,

that my heartache become a madness
that neither holiness nor love canst quell
save that nothing save me otherwise,
that I become married to,
nay,
that I BECOME love and holiness,
righteousness, too,
that my righteous wrath,
be spared annexation to evil,
that my vengeances be preserved
and mine enemies kept alive
in my everlasting joy
of what punisheth them,
eterally!

That I,
may be born celibate
before knowing my virginity
simply to inquire
ahead of custom and common ontological seeking
query women,
that they do still, without vanity,
utter the word, the sign, the force, the mind, the passion, "LOVE."

let alone perform it, that which it is I say,
a man's privilege to declare that he knoweth love,
and women darest have never had it,
yet they deign gave God's breath to their desires of love,
reified it
believed in it
let alone had faith in themselves that men died for their ******
that marriage be ****** by the succubus in God's heaven!

They'd dare!

take it, from me, in my offering,
that I would love her,
truly,
in earnest
and see her fed of love
as like water
like milk to a babe
or,
should she deign me less than a man
due my will to love her
should she deign herself queen without me,

whenever the moment strikes
she'll dare, on a whim,
part her legs
for any man
declaring himself "King."
though he be a vagrant,
a pauper, a louse, a street urchin,
with gold bullion cascading from his pockets
because I, dared declare, "I love her..."
that she should **** such a lecherous, maggot semened
cuckold of love who would bed her with envy of me
and joy of that envy sated
true joy in his ******* of my wife
for he sold his soul
to bed her
buy her
and found his purchase met faithfully
that he might, unfaithfully
unholily,
amuse her
dwell in her
due the purchase of womanhood
due the market prices many celebrate ****** by,
rather,
due the "Graces", the unlovable, evil, malice
the bloodied, rancid, defiled, arrogant ignorant, so-called
"love" exemplified, demonstrated primarily, of
a djinn, a monster, a fiend, a demon,
a devil, in fact,
so called:

SATAN
Beware infidelity. Beware hate. Beware homosexuality.

Marriage becomes cheap when wives, literally any woman (and/or girl), therefore, can become ****** for any price...

... even her own...

For if ALL who have souls, and can be of soul,
redeemed and otherwise, earned or any such boon,
can defile themselves such,
that their soulmates, in heaven, can watch the madness,
and yet, somehow, while such a person,
man or woman, defiles themselves, and soils the holiness of their souls,
so richly that they've earned hells in the faux-merriments,
can, again in the midst of such a savagery of hell,
EXPECT to remain one's soulmate, though thou watchest FROM heaven,
how can one, in heaven, expect, rightfully and knowingly, to be married
to such a *****, a giggolo, a succubus, an incubus,
when better that hell be fed
than thou be wed
to such a demon
and therein with lucifer
may she, and he, and whomever else was of the ****
be cast into that eternal deep
to be of that eternal hell's keep
and weep
and sleep not ever again a peep
not a peep would such a holy husband, or wife,
need hear of their soiled "love one"
or, "significant other" whatever phrase sates the asylum-deserved
that roam the world these days,
except to know, due that holy spouse's need of peace be found
that their "loved one" know not pleasure
ever again
except to learn, and known omnisciently,
perfectly away from experience, even potential,
that it will never be given them, due them,
ever again,
such that the impetus of change, and remisison of sins
be absolute, nonnegotiable, and past argument,
such that any denial of the need for hell for such a person of denial of their sins, or any unholy reprisal, of their behalf,
be an immediate penalty of 1000 years of torture PER infraction,
for if we are immortal. eternal beings,
1000 years of hell, per adulterous, orgiastic ****, should be more than enough to sate whatever rage is due them,
let anyone, who'd be enraged at such an adulterous spouse,
be laughably and amateurly "accused" of spousal abuse!

If they be in hell, and "complain" of abuse, due the judgment wrought,
such that they literally interned themselves,
but claim they were deceived,
what then, should we say of abuse, if it be adultery that we,
who are scorned, should be under the perpetual threat of,
such that the very concepts of marriage
soulmates, love, commitment, virginity, celibacy,
honeymoons, consummations, "first loves",
first-times, second-times, third-times,
anniversaries, mothers- and fathers-in-law,
and all manner pleasureful trifles
such as puppy love, young love,
sweet 16s, and more than the like
be taken over by,

"First *******!" "First ******* for my teenage daughter."
And all other kinds of unholy ******* that adultery is merely the gateway to?!

Who would DARE bear the threat of adultery then?!
LEt alone such a spouse who, due her spiteful will,
like a petulant teenager, went to a *******, in protest,
due to having her "request", under pain of "being nice"
therefore asking first, to go TO the ******* ANYWAY,
(due it, her "request", therefore, of her husband, being denied)
she took it upon herself to go ANYWAY,
because how dare her husband deny her 30 ***** when she's tired of his one
average pecker?

The GALL of him! (Sarcasm, of couse...)

So, yes, to hell with her (LITERALLY), and every gent who thought himself lucky to have her, while also knowing I exist, regardless.

That nothing of innocence be protected?
That WARS be fought, over marriage fidelity?
Really? Something so simple?
To hell with all who doth protest.
SIMPLY!
Though your sins may fulfill you in this life
They serve no purpose upon you in the next
Prepare yourself for what will be
Seek mercy for yourself and others
In preparation for what is to come
And in peace you shall reside
For time here is fleeting and ambiguous at best
Though innocence is not needed
Repentance is required
In these moments acceptance shall serve you
Cast judgement aside
In him with him in unity with God the creator you shall remain
Though your sins may fulfill you in this life
They serve no purpose upon you in the next
Prepare yourself for what will be
Seek mercy for yourself and others
In preparation for what is to come
And in peace you shall reside
For time here is fleeting and ambiguous at best
Though innocence is not needed
Repentance is required
In these moments acceptance shall serve you
Cast judgement aside
In him with him in unity with God the creator you shall remain
Repentant Jan 29
The man in the digital world
May lose sight of the labour works
May lose sight of the Iman
He may not be able
To see the lawful presence of her wife
He may think oh it's just a like
Oh it's just a message
The man in the digital world
May think everything is just suppose to happen
The man in the digital world
May can't understand the why
He may lose sight in truth
He may trust all the lies
The man in the digital world
May lose everything he loves
To gain the sight of Osiris
You should first lose an eye
The man in the digital world
May lose love in his heart
Blessed whomever I have hurt
Forgive me if I have hurt you with my ineffective lies
I thought I was telling the truth
I thought there was a chance to win
I didn't know I was planned to lose
To gain the knowledge of the world we live
You may think I am a genius
Who spent his life in lies
I beg the differ and forgiveness
My pictures should be stamped as fools in your eyes
Bless every person that has been a part of my life and tried to help me understand and didn't know what was actually happening in my mind. One day, we shall all see, we all shall see Infront of the god.for that day, forgive me and bless me on my path to hell, shall I be burned a decade less or a century more, I wish you all just the heaven.
Repentant Jan 26
Because I am a robot
I just follow the carrot
All I see as donkey
Is the face behind the parrot
It better be the dumbest
Than be the smartest in the world
If I can't go up the ladder
I better stay indoors
Because you are a human
You just use me for satisfaction
You see me as a potato
With holes to drill in the head
Two is not enough so more
You remove the eyes and the latter
To me you are just a tor
I have peeled your faces off the hatter
And what a beautiful soul you have
Behind all those sins you were hiding in
Behind all the fake mentorships
Behind all the action hits
We are only angels
Devil's born inside
The devil is in the details
Thanks to god above
Each sin is a torment on the soul, necessary to be accepted but beholden, taught but explained, for life is a hard place, if you want to stay alienated.
For the good may seem bad and the bad may seem good to the eyes that can't get past the hardship of the truth, stay safe, sane and sinless. Other wise, repent.
I lose my shape, shattered
In turmoil, deeply battered
Beneath my veil, head bowed and tattered.

I lose my way, defeated
In steps that forget to plead,
In anger blind to its misdeeds.

O Master of the Universe,
I am lost,
Forgotten the path of obedience.

O Ruler of the Horizon,
At Your door, I knock in submission,
To embrace the light of devotion.
Dom Nov 2024
i am a filthy crusted towel
who was doomed to forever
in a laundry bin.
but when i came to Him
He made me clean.
i still collect stains
but His love will always make
me clean again.
God loves you. May you turn to Him and may He bless you all!
EMMANUELLE MALOK Sep 2024
"Ô Dieu, ai-je pris ta grâce pour acquise ?
Ai-je oublié la voie étroite que je dois traverser ?
Ai-je oublié que tu es saint et que tu ne vis que dans la sainteté ?

Il est vrai que tu aimes le pécheur, mais j'ai déjà été rachetée.
Tu m'as conduite à la vérité.
Et maintenant, qu'est-ce que je fais ? Deviens-je pire que les Galates ?

Suis-je en train d'oublier le sacrifice de la croix et la persévérance que tu nous exhorte à pratiquer ?
Deviens-je une paresseuse éternelle,
qui ne pense qu'au plaisir, somnolente dans ma chair ?

Père, pardonne-moi,
pardonne-moi, car j'ai laissé tomber toutes les voies que tu m'as apprises,
en laissant le laxisme et la paresse m'envahir.
Je ne comprends pas que je ne suis pas indispensable.

Je ne voudrais pas être mise de côté.
J'aimerais vraiment que tu m'utilises,
que je revienne à ma consécration,
à mon alliance et à mon amour premier.
Je te prie de ne point détourner ta face de moi.
Aide moi père
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