Four years elapsed,
Since the world collapsed,
And I still can’t delete it,
Delete it from my head.

The concrete impaction,
One solitary action,
From able to chained,
Chained to his deathbed.

And I’m disturbed by the memories,
Sad for the suffering–

                For his suffering,
                For their suffering,
                For the collective rippling of suffering…

Tragedy inspires, I’m told,
But its message is lost upon me,
Blurred in darkness,
A stop-motion picture,
Haunting me, frame by frame.

Homing in on this harrowing loss,
I find my focus will never sharpen,
Just like he will never come back,
And so, I’m left fixating on that which
I can neither fully remember nor fail to forget.

Pour me a scotch son and let your father talk.
Untie his tongue and hear his secrets sing.
Release the torrent there within.

And repressed within that sacred silence
Recollections hold their breath to survive.
Let go this man who was once alive.

Tom Lefort 2024

Found among Dad's things while cleaning out his condo. He died at the end of December:

EXHORTATION TO A TROPICAL FRUIT

Go
Mango!

AT THE HEALTH SPA

Virginia slims
Virginia's limbs

THE ULTIMATE CHALLENGE

The daredevil
Dared evil.

LEBANON

Malicious
Militias

THE HOSTESS AND THE BASKETBALL PLAYER

Julia serving
Julius Erving

Upon your death, friends

unanimously agree --


on your character.

I was on a journey to find my core,
Through heartaches deep, in search of something true.
A soul adrift, emotions all askew,
In quest of worth, I longed for something more.


Through winding paths where shadows seemed to creep,
I sought for treasures in life's vast array,
Yet each pursuit left me in disarray,
As yearning eyes welled up with tears to weep.


In the final dusk, clarity emerged,
A whisper soft, a truth that set me free.
The love of Allah, a balm, a key,
Now, in His grace, my troubled heart has surged.


Remembrance of what's vital, pure release,
In His love, my soul finds lasting peace.
The lesson I learned in pursuit of importance, our hearts misled,
Messing the threads of truth, chasing illusions we bred.


If you inquire of true remembrance,
I'd share the extract—life's secret recipe.
Remembrance, a tapestry woven in the mind,
Threads of cherished moments, in our hearts entwined.

soft falls the silence
gentle rain upon your face
beads full between those waiting lips
a poet once, but taking sips of watered war
has stilled your voice
and beauty speaks no more

Ghosts dance around me
and I am stepping on their toes
they curse me as I walk backwards
tracing old footprints
wishing them to come back into color,
that a familiar hand
and a smile I remember
might reach back out and ask
if I can keep a secret—
if I’d like to dance with them again?

Though you've left me, lost not found
It is your voice I hear around
Silence of sound permeates this room
A life remembered, hearts filled with gloom
All friends and family gathered 'round
I can't bring myself to make a sound
A love undying; a heart felt broken
I lie awake with arms wide open
In the dead of night, I witness your embrace
I feel your breath upon my face
I dream once, and dream again
Your love I feel, though not like then
As these ghosts of our love surround
My memories open my heart abound
Echoes of our love remain
Grief and silence, sound and pain
Those sapphire roses that I once bought
Say thee nothing, they were for naught
All the thoughts of which I find
The echoes of your essence remind
I see you not, but hear you there
Though in my mind, you're everywhere
A love as ours shall remain long and true
Even with only echoes of you