i declaim, even bellow,
as she turn the a/c to below
the below, to sleep deep,
but then the chillers
invade like an army of Orcs,
now that my body fat now
three Yules gone bye bye
(and twenty yrs too late)

N.B. (FYI: she’s typically the one with
frequently freezing appendages!)

She mocks my screaming,
you are declaring decidedly,
me to be the hottest man-nequin,
with whom
she has ever slept~in,
has bed shared, for a consistent
statiscally valid time of period,
and the proofs
she offers is by
climbing aboard
my chiller self
,
to steal my entire inner warmth,
she being a skinny shapeshifting,
luscious figure whose body temp
barely registers 98 degrees
(per Ouro device!)

i scream out loud,
     the neighbors knock,
hearing me utter in agony
“your cold body is burning me,”
which with practice
SHE~IT
has learned to ignore for i
am  but the fly to
be engorged in her
Venus fly trap,
suiting  her purposes  
happily unwittingly

She tells me once again,
baby, baby
“you’re  my heart’s desire,
set me on fire,
once is
never enough
of a man like you,
do it again,
one more time!”

and believing
she suckeredme again
wiley giggles
loudly in my
blueish ear

I had forgotten the language of fire,
How words could burn and rise, inspire.
For years, my heart lay cold and still,
A hushed and empty, barren hill.

But then he came, with a quiet spark,
A light in the void, a song in the dark.
His presence a key, unlocking the door,
To parts of myself I’d lost before.

He stirred the ashes, he fanned the flame,
Awakening passions I could not name.
Poems poured forth, creativity bloomed,
A garden of love where shadows loomed.

Not since sixteen had I loved this way,
So fiercely alive, so willing to stay.
He reminded me of what it could be,
To love without fear, to simply be free.

But now he is gone, his light withdrawn,
And the fire he lit flickers at dawn.
My pen grows heavy, my heart turns cold,
As the warmth he gave begins to fold.

He was my muse, my radiant sun,
The source of the art my soul had spun.
Now every verse feels brittle and thin,
A hollow echo of what might have been.

Still, I thank him for the time he gave,
For waking the parts I couldn’t save.
Though the flame may fade, the embers remain,
A whisper of love, a trace of pain.

i once cherished to a flower with care,
Watching it bloom, its scent would suffuse the air.

But as time passed, i grew bored, weary,
And stopped your care, not fully there.
As the days went by, the scent waned,

Just like that, the flower was gone.
Now you yearn for the fragrance you once ignored,
And crave the care you let pass, forever more.

Will you kiss my scars?
Will you love my rot and decay too?
Crystallize me in all that’s unnatural and unpleasant.
Frame me in my ugly.
Be there when I see no light but only beckoning hands into the darkness.
Cut me your hand to hold instead of trimming the edges of my sanity.
Starve yourself with me. Starve yourself of me.
Taste me when I’m solely iron in your body,
trickling down your nose to remind you I'm there.
Feed me sugar cubes to keep the flies warm.
Wean me off the good stuff until I shame you for sharing.
Won’t you keep me sated?
Won’t you blanket your daisies in my mouth?
But what about the moths?
What about the maggots and, oh, what about the monkeys that tease you to let me go?
Let the dead go. Let her go, they say.
You won’t kiss my scars again if you knew I was dead.
Decaying won and I still love you!
I still love you.
I still love you.
How can’t I?
You loved me enough to care for the rot.

I can't quite remember
the moment
everything
shifted

when I stopped waking up
feeling anything but tired
or when I stopped going to sleep
praying for anything but the end

maybe it was the day you left
physically, I mean
or perhaps the weeks leading up
the weeks that numbed me to my bones

perhaps it was the months that followed
and the way little parts of me
seemed to just
drift away

I stopped looking both ways
while crossing a busy road
stopped being careful
while walking alone in public

I didn't notice when I stopped running
to the safety of my bed once the lights went out
instead I slowly wandered through the house
no longer afraid of the dark or what it could hide

because what can a car
or a creep
or the dark, where my fears would once reap
do that will ever compare to the way
you broke me

We started with a blank, cracked wall
Hands shaking, we began to thaw
With every stroke, a world took form,
A story began, vibrant and warm.

I filled in the cracks, with thin veins of gold
Figured it'd last, and covered ugly with bold.
Excited to start, I sank into thought,
But you quietly noticed I had missed some spots.

The first layer was bright, unrestrained,
Colors of joy we couldn’t contain
We painted sunsets, golden and vast
Believing that forever would last.

You taught me to blend the shades of the sky,
I showed you the beauty in the colors of night.
Together, we built a world so grand,
Each stroke a testament to what we’d planned.

But soon, the brushes began to fray
People stared, and called us by names
We argued over colors, shapes, and space,
Yet somehow kept painting, pace by pace.

The mural grew heavy with pain and mistakes
We painted thunderstorms, chaos, and rain.
Still, tears watered flowers into bloom,
A stubborn hope shining through the gloom.

The onlookers left, but the rain eroded
Behind the clouds, faded veins of gold corroded
The thunder faded, and I blindly rejoiced
Unknowingly, I had cemented your choice

One day I looked up, to find in dismay
Your brushes abandoned, your colors turned gray.
I stood by the wall, lost and unsure,
Facing a masterpiece that felt like a blur.

With trembling hands, I picked up the brush,
In the deafening silence, my own sobs turned to hush.
I painted alone, though your colors remained,
Ghostly imprints of joy and pain.

A lighthouse painted, its beacon dim,
Two figures either side, watching it spin.
Fields of poppies, you had once made vibrant and lush,
Accidentally smeared under my hesitant brush.

My paint dryed up, eyes beckoned by sleep
A lifetime sprawled in colors and feats.
I stand before it, heart in my throat,
People walk by, unaware of what's wrote.

There’s the golden sun, where we began,
And the rain-soaked earth where our troubles ran.
The images we painted together sing,
While my final strokes frame them clumsily.

And yet, I marvel at what we’ve made,
The laughter, the love, the dreams that stayed.
It’s cracked, raw, and painfully true,
A testament to both me and you.

I step back now, my brushes laid down,
The mural is finished—its truths resound.
Alone, I face this mural we’ve drawn,
And wonder what it means to move on.

We could have had a world with tender hands,
A place where love and trust could stand.
Your laughter lived inside my chest,
Your voice—the song that I loved best.

But tides have turned, and we must part,
Unravel bonds that tied the heart.
To strangers now, we must return,
Though every fiber aches and burns.

Your shadow lingers in my days,
A haunting glow, a quiet blaze.
Yet strangers again we must learn to be,
Though love still whispers endlessly.

Your name—a ghost upon my tongue,
A song unsung, forever young.

The pieces of you, etched in my soul,
Remain, though I must let you go.
A cruel design—to love, then sever,
To fade to strangers, but remember forever.

Will echoes call you in the night,
To places bathed in softer light?
Where love was found, where hearts were bare,
Will you still feel me lingering there?

For love, it doesn’t simply die;
It folds itself—a breath, a sigh—
And hides in corners of the mind,
A treasure lost, but still confined.

I hoped we’d never walk this lane,
To sever ties and bear this pain.
For soulmates shouldn’t face this end,
A love so rare should never bend.
But you have chosen another path,
And left me broken in your aftermath.

I hope she gives you all you need,
A love that sets your spirit free.
But selfishly, I still believe,
It’s me who holds the key to “we.”

No matter how hard I try, I can’t let go
I wish it were me you’d choose to know.
I want your joy, I want your peace,
Yet I ache to be the one who brings you ease.

So though we’ll walk as strangers now,
And wear this fate we disavow,
Know this: no time, no fate, no fear
Can make the love I have for you disappear.

Tragically, the path we were on has reached its end,
And now will leave us strangers once again.