It was a usual and happy life wondering will I get a man I like
I went to his home as his wife, life was like a play time, he earned money and I cooked fine
Soon I had a child with beautiful bright smile
A happy family it was but with big lies
"The love is missing, the spark is missing" were my only lines
My man was with someone else living his wonderful life
I should have known, I should have gotten any signs
As I couldn't bear living my life that was half of others and half mine
Started to accept new city life with tall buildings and bright lights
Struggle was real to live without my daughter, my lifeline
But food and shelter were the only thing that matter at this time
How beautiful yellow hoodie looked on me because of my smile
Hiding all emotions and questions I have in my heart and in my mind
Sitting in a dark room beside a man behaving everything was fine
I could feel him, a person; I haven't met in my life
At first, I cried and cried till my tears dried
At second, I cried and walked for a mile
At third, I accepted with clear eyes
And now again it’s a usual and unhappy life wondering will I be someone whom I like.

It would be nice
If my demons loved me
the way I love them
If they curled up like cats
or ran to me like dogs
if the sang in they morning to wake me up
or howled at the moon signalling sleep
instead
they creep around the issues
afraid to accept
the love
I have
the understanding I've gained for them
or maybe its me
and even demons can't love me

Why?
The motive of a peoples
The reason we are

Why?
The driving force of history
The catalyst of the future

Why?
The question asked every day
To learn our being here

Why?
The ode to my sadness
The reason of my doubt

Why?
The key to all questions
But couldn’t unlock my heart

Why?
The question I wonder when I think about you
The question I ask as to the reason I do

Why?
My silent cry in the dark
The haunting echoes of a chamber

Why do I miss you?

Questions, I have all these questions
questions with no answers
answers that are incomplete
I try to look
I try to find
but the truth is..
I'm not sure what I seek..
The longer I search..
the more I know..
I'll be forever lost

Do you think it would be okay if I sat ?
If I took this opportunity to talk ,
and you to listen ,
For me to sort my thoughts ,
for you to see my cheeks redden .

Perhaps it would be alright if I stared a little longer than I should've ?
Maybe if you were staring back we'd be okay ,
for me to watch you avert your gaze,
If you could quiet the noise for a second ,
there's no end to your power ,
Silence my nerves with a look ,
appreciate movement .

If I could just accompany you for a minute ?
I'd tell you all about yourself ,
the you I believe in ,
the person I hoped you'd bring out in me .

But by all means ,
this seat is saved for someone else ,
my intentions remain pure ,
wait for her ,
I'll wait for you .