You called for me
after I uttered your name
in a passing conversation,
but it’s too late now, father

You see,
I’ve already drank
your poison,
I savored it to the last drop

It’s in my bloodstream,
it’s in my hollow stomach,
it’s pouring over
everything that I am today

My soul is mine,
you can’t touch it,
it’s achingly burning from a
fire I can’t extinguish alone

Your name is laced
with mine, I’m sorry
I couldn’t forget you

But please let me
keep my soul,
It’s mine,
but can I keep it?

It burns me,
let me keep it anyway

~
if you're feeling sinister tonight, come inside the darkroom. picture yourself pouring over mental images of a demure young botanist, loitering around the trapdoor of nostalgia, kissing someone new for the first time.

now imagine she is conscious and clustered in titillating blur, her smile beachy and airborne, with only the slightest suggestion that something troublesome is lurking underneath.

can you see her double exposure? totally tranquil, she poses with an arsenal of poisonous plants, as if she’s already slipped their venom into your tea.
~

the flower
holding on to the soil
with what's left from
its' root, lost in turmoil
lost most of it
lost to the attacks
of its own species
lost when it trusted
them the most, because
the flower didn't fit in

the snake—
alluring notions held in its eyes
tongue twitching with noxious desire
arrogance held in a sauntered slink
vile venom dousing budding souls
—lends itself to this nature

blame is like a posion
no one wants to carry its weight
so they pass it onto you
as you're considered
a pushover
in their language

I am the moth and you are the flame.
Bodies dropping and you are to blame.

You attract us to your hurtful light.
All of us burning, oh so bright.

Everybody wants a piece of you.
Beautiful light left us to fume.

I want you all for myself.
But this pretty little flame can't help herself.

Saturn Rx in Aquarius     - June 5th 2022

We recognized our other - selves
baking in the furnace of a Holy Relationship;
a hot crucible of an octave -
a high note.
in the dwindling and the withering we glowed
and we grew.
we walked into the no-light of the
New Moon.
we cracked open a lead egg
it was full of hidden memories -
atrocity and betrayal
and roses that drew blood when you plucked them.
the koshi bell skies were bright
despite the
dim
Gemini
new - lunar night.

what once we thought were vampire bats
were one thousand albino doves
who flew from thy heart
while you sat inside the dark -
trying to ***.
one thousand doves were flying from thy heart
while we discovered new
alleyways between the west Lancaster streets
and played detective
solving criminal activity mysteries
like partners walking the beat
at half past three in the morning.
we danced with the devil against the
cobblestone.
we forgave his filthy ***** deeds.
the citronella candle light was gleaming in our minds
and we were beaming then,
dancing with our shadows against the bricks
and the bible verses stenciled
along the
alley walls.
we loved each other then
even as we had been loved.
our hearts were two bouquets full of peacock feathers.

King street
meets Queen
by a circle inside a square.
we were as royalty then
sitting with one another
there on the bench
regal
open
and free.
we had let in the blood-letters
and our hearts were a smeared bleed
seeping into higher lines of time.
we were happy then,
I placed my hand on the front and the back of your heart
and I saw you then
under the yellow lights
regal
open
and free.
the Gemini winds were whispering
like the wings of Hermes’ feet.
your eyes were bright blue like
how does the howling of the wind..
color and sound compressed
and became as one.
my words were flashing forth like
royal  jelly from the hive-
or the Oil of Christ
burning
our tongues
and foreheads
like lilies of the
white
creator fire.
Anointed, we saw each other then
from the summit of a hill
our hearts were two baskets full of rose petals.

but the dawn went down to day
an american poet once said that
“nothing gold can stay.”
and I started seeing flies again in the kitchen -
creepin
and buzzing up against the windows,
palmetto bugs at night on the concrete walkabouts,
pit vipers hissing on behind me
coiled up in whicker burn baskets
and the low hanging branches of trees.
they say honey doesn’t go bad
but it only took 12 hours for mine to sour.
I said mean things
and I saw evil shapes cast against the walls.
I went blind and deaf
I couldn’t see all the beauty unfolding on before before me
I couldn’t  hear the hymns of peace
being sung above the clouds.
you said you’re about numb to it now;
laying there
curled up and
inoculated from all my onslaughts.
If i could, why
I would take
all those bad words
of my dweller’s mouth
and hide them in a poison pendant
capped with an Ethiopian opal.

we both would know, of course
that all those
mean words
with the serrated edges
of the bitter ends of frayed nerves
wouldn’t really be gone
and that they’d still be there-
just kind of
locked away
and hidden inside a poison pendant.
but
at least opals are beautiful.

by: Jordan Gee

You are poison

Yet your lips on mine
That taste so sweet
Your Hands running up and down my back
Slow enough to make me draw you closer

When instead
I should be pushing you away
Because you're killing me
Slowly

As your kiss
Is paralyzing me
And your hands
So gentle
Yet fast enough
To bruise me
That I hurt

For I don't know how to decide
On who I love more
You
Or myself